Need Help On How To Make My Wife Sexually Active?

[Anel King]

Hi Bro & Sis of SBF

I've been married for 4 1/2 years now. Before marriage I was active in Geylang and HC's almost every month 1 or 2 times. ONS also once in 1 month.

When I was dating my wife stop everything in Geylang & HC's. Only maximum was sucked her nipples, which surprised me as she was conservativebut she was the one who initiated it.

After marriage, we had sex almost every other day till our 1st child. During the 9 months, she didn’t allow me to even finger her below. 4 months after our 1st child we had sex. I was like a caged animal let loose. But we only had sex 1 a month.

Last year was out 3rd anniversary we had decent sex. The next 3 months we only had once a month till April she confirmed she was pregnant again. Again I got hung dry and DIY from April last year till 2 weeks ago.

Looks like I still won’t have sex whenever I want to cause she like not so interested to even start anything. But once we start, she wants to finish fast. And only missionary, from 1st day to today.

No matter what I try to tell her or what I do, she only what to have when she is ok and only in missionary, nothing else.

I don't want to head back to my old play grounds as that will tear the family apart. I am only a regular for JG in the Tuina shop in CV.

Was wondering if any experience bros & sis can advice.

Regards
Anel King

[samyboys]

http://www.sammyboyforum.com/showthread.php?t=168710

bro, guess quite many guys feel the same like you.
the woman becomes dead fish and sex becomes monotonous
sex frequency also drops
all i can think of is for you to get away from kids and have a short break to recharge yourself, else with kids in tow, u can never relax

[tigerprawn]

Reality of life. Common problem that is why a lot of married guys patronise FL or have affairs. Especially in this case where it is not that you got sick of fcking your wife but more cos she lost interest in sex and performing it more as a duty. Bro, realistically you may end up on your old habits again if this carries on, but please just play safe outside for the wellbeing of your family.

[deptrai4u]

Hi Bro & Sis of SBF

Was wondering if any experience bros & sis can advice.

Regards
Anel King

Tell her... if she does not want to service u, there are many waiting in the queue to provide u much better service..

Bro, if u married a Singapore girl.. then this WILL be ur destiny liao.. u either feel sorry for the rest of your "fucking" life or u should venture out and get what u deserve..

Singapore girls are like that.. they only know "I want, I want I want.." and forgot about the needs of the husband or even pretend not to know.

Of course many here can suggest counseling or whatever.. but let me tell u there she will have a longer list of excuse than yours ... so forget it!

Venture out, have ur fun, eat outside remember to wipe ur mouth, when back home, pretend to be a good husband, like that lor... how else???

If u really want to change her thinking... better u use ur efforts to save the world.

[Urbane]

Maybe you can try to groom yourself ? Get into fitness activities, take more care on how you look, things that makes guys more attractive.

She will notice it and think that maybe you are eating on the outside. She may then pay more attention to you and be more accomodating towards you. It's a good passive aggressive method.

[sgiceboy]

wah bro

@ least u did have sex after yr first child.

for my case hor... alreadi 3 yrs NO SEX liao...:(

everyday see porn & DIY.... or else how to relieve pressure.....

take it easy...lor.. live each day as it passes....

[digdug]

sgiceboy - 3 yrs NO SEX ? OMFG!! :eek:

You got to talk to your wife. 3 yrs NO SEX and you hang around SBF... wow, how do you stand it?

[lovestar]

how true... i wish somebody would tell that to a gal

[cereal-killer]

Hi Bro & Sis of SBF

I've been married for 4 1/2 years now. Before marriage I was active in Geylang and HC's almost every month 1 or 2 times. ONS also once in 1 month.

When I was dating my wife stop everything in Geylang & HC's. Only maximum was sucked her nipples, which surprised me as she was conservativebut she was the one who initiated it.

After marriage, we had sex almost every other day till our 1st child. During the 9 months, she didn’t allow me to even finger her below. 4 months after our 1st child we had sex. I was like a caged animal let loose. But we only had sex 1 a month.

Last year was out 3rd anniversary we had decent sex. The next 3 months we only had once a month till April she confirmed she was pregnant again. Again I got hung dry and DIY from April last year till 2 weeks ago.

Looks like I still won’t have sex whenever I want to cause she like not so interested to even start anything. But once we start, she wants to finish fast. And only missionary, from 1st day to today.

No matter what I try to tell her or what I do, she only what to have when she is ok and only in missionary, nothing else.

I don't want to head back to my old play grounds as that will tear the family apart. I am only a regular for JG in the Tuina shop in CV.

Was wondering if any experience bros & sis can advice.

Regards
Anel King

Let me guess, She's Not Working .... and you don't have maid.

if it is, then "most likely" she is just toooo stressed up handling two kids
plus they are like 2 years apart ?

You need to take the load off her, you need to come back and fill that gap during the evening. Bond with your children and get close to her again and every thing should be fine.

Its gonna take awhile, but my guess is, you're going to loose heart and go back FL or GL again.

[Drooler]

Bro i totally understand how you feel cos i was in the same predicament.Try having a talk with your wife, you are both adults. originally i had difficulty coping as well, stress built up then frustration. decided then to speak to my wife and got green light to get my 'release' she understands that men need sex......and paid sex is nothing but a transaction.

If however one day should i get into an affair and feelings are involved then i will be at fault.

Take it easy and try to do as one of the bro's suggested, the get fit method. cos
1) you need that fitness anyways to handle your kids
2) you will feel good about yourself
3) women are like that, they say looks dont matter but in the end, if they see a hunk, they will still take a second glance.

Good luck dude.

[reflexk]

wah bro

@ least u did have sex after yr first child.

for my case hor... alreadi 3 yrs NO SEX liao...:(

everyday see porn & DIY.... or else how to relieve pressure.....

take it easy...lor.. live each day as it passes....

Bro, you deserve Nobel prize for peace, at least much more than Obama :D..

[sgiceboy]

sgiceboy - 3 yrs NO SEX ? OMFG!! :eek:

You got to talk to your wife. 3 yrs NO SEX and you hang around SBF... wow, how do you stand it?

bro.... after yrs of cheonging, wasting time and $... u tend to realise we men jus need to release dats all... how you want to do it, it's really to u:p

[Anel King]

http://www.sammyboyforum.com/showthread.php?t=168710

bro, guess quite many guys feel the same like you.
the woman becomes dead fish and sex becomes monotonous
sex frequency also drops
all i can think of is for you to get away from kids and have a short break to recharge yourself, else with kids in tow, u can never relax

Well Bro

I tried to convince her to go to bintan with me for the week end last week. but she didn't want to leave the kids.

Will try again next week once my MIL comes back

Regards
Anel king

[Anel King]

Reality of life. Common problem that is why a lot of married guys patronise FL or have affairs. Especially in this case where it is not that you got sick of fcking your wife but more cos she lost interest in sex and performing it more as a duty. Bro, realistically you may end up on your old habits again if this carries on, but please just play safe outside for the wellbeing of your family.

Thanks for your concern Bro

I have been thinking about it the last 3 months actually about going to my old playgrounds. But i just DIY and release the stress. I don't know how long more i can tahan.

But will still lun for as long as possible.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Tell her... if she does not want to service u, there are many waiting in the queue to provide u much better service..

Bro, if u married a Singapore girl.. then this WILL be ur destiny liao.. u either feel sorry for the rest of your "fucking" life or u should venture out and get what u deserve..

Singapore girls are like that.. they only know "I want, I want I want.." and forgot about the needs of the husband or even pretend not to know.

Of course many here can suggest counseling or whatever.. but let me tell u there she will have a longer list of excuse than yours ... so forget it!

Venture out, have ur fun, eat outside remember to wipe ur mouth, when back home, pretend to be a good husband, like that lor... how else???

If u really want to change her thinking... better u use ur efforts to save the world.

Bro

Although what ever you said sounded funny, but I think it sounds very correct. Especially it sounds alot like my wife. Maybe even other bro will say the same that its a typical Singaporean wife problem.

I did tell her indirectly once a fews weeks ago when she went to Bangkok with the kids leaving me here. I said, cheekily that i might go to GL soon to F**k if she doesn't want to. She said, go lah!

I have been to China almost every other month since last year for work. And every time my suppliers want to bring me to Drinking, KTV & Massage. I always decline as I wanted to be with Wife only.

Then in May i went to Jiaxing for work again. I was pretty happy with the work that I went to KTV with them and drank nicely. (Those who work or do business in China will know how they are when the let loose) They got a girl to be with me. I was a bit high, so we were rabba rabba ing each other, but dont know in my mind i picture my wife.

Going back time, my supplier kept on asking me to take the girls back to the hotel. i kept on saying no which in the end i didn't.

On the way to the hotel, i called my wife @ 1am. she asked what happened & i told her everything. She was a little disturbed that i was drunk (I don't drink in at all. Only during NS or when i go Reservist) and telling her about the girl.

But she was calm and relieved. She was happy that i was self restraining and was thinking of her. But it wasn't enough for me to make love with her again.

So I am lost again and might end up in my playground again and follow what you mentioned:
Venture out, have ur fun, eat outside remember to wipe ur mouth, when back home, pretend to be a good husband

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Maybe you can try to groom yourself ? Get into fitness activities, take more care on how you look, things that makes guys more attractive.

She will notice it and think that maybe you are eating on the outside. She may then pay more attention to you and be more accomodating towards you. It's a good passive aggressive method.

Well Bro

I have recently started to work out in California Fitness with a trainer. Will see the result in 2 months time.

Hopefully it works.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

wah bro

@ least u did have sex after yr first child.

for my case hor... alreadi 3 yrs NO SEX liao...:(

everyday see porn & DIY.... or else how to relieve pressure.....

take it easy...lor.. live each day as it passes....

Bro

Hopefully I don't end up like you, but I sympathize with you as I know what you are going through.

But seriously 3 years is too long liow. I think would ended up in GL or HC already if i was you.

But hang in there bro if you can.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Let me guess, She's Not Working .... and you don't have maid.

if it is, then "most likely" she is just toooo stressed up handling two kids
plus they are like 2 years apart ?

You need to take the load off her, you need to come back and fill that gap during the evening. Bond with your children and get close to her again and every thing should be fine.

Its gonna take awhile, but my guess is, you're going to loose heart and go back FL or GL again.

Actually bro not really.

Yes she is not working.

But we have alot of help. We live in my parents house with them and my brother & his wife. We have 2 maids. 1 helps to take care of the kids, even sometimes when the younger one wakes up in the middle of the night. My in-laws leave 1 lane away from our house. so no shortage of helping hands.

I usually come back by 6.45 have dinner and play with the kids till 9. I will shower my older one and change her in to her pajamas and make her milk. My wife feeds her and put her to sleep. My second one will be taken care of by the maid.

Only one problem i have is my snoring. so i sleep in the next room so that I don't disturb my wife & kids sleep. We have had sex with my older one sleeping on the same bed.(When trying to have my second one)

Hopefully since now i am going to the gym, i will loose weight and bring down my snoring so that i can sleep in the same room again to increase my chances of loving her.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Bro i totally understand how you feel cos i was in the same predicament.Try having a talk with your wife, you are both adults. originally i had difficulty coping as well, stress built up then frustration. decided then to speak to my wife and got green light to get my 'release' she understands that men need sex......and paid sex is nothing but a transaction.

If however one day should i get into an affair and feelings are involved then i will be at fault.

Take it easy and try to do as one of the bro's suggested, the get fit method. cos
1) you need that fitness anyways to handle your kids
2) you will feel good about yourself
3) women are like that, they say looks dont matter but in the end, if they see a hunk, they will still take a second glance.

Good luck dude.

Hi Bro

i didn't catch the 1st part of when your wife gave you the green light. Did she allow you to screw in GL/HC?

The Second part about affairs, I agree 100%

Last part, I am already working on it in progress. And i agree that you might be right?

Reagrds
Anel King

[samyboys]

Reality of life. Common problem that is why a lot of married guys patronise FL or have affairs. Especially in this case where it is not that you got sick of fcking your wife but more cos she lost interest in sex and performing it more as a duty. Bro, realistically you may end up on your old habits again if this carries on, but please just play safe outside for the wellbeing of your family.

i guess at times, woman knows woman best.
that is why FLs are here to fill the void.
i feel it difficult to work it out with the other half as she will have more than enough 'reasons' to silence you.

so if u really need to outsource, do it safely

[samyboys]

Bro i totally understand how you feel cos i was in the same predicament.Try having a talk with your wife, you are both adults. originally i had difficulty coping as well, stress built up then frustration. decided then to speak to my wife and got green light to get my 'release' she understands that men need sex......and paid sex is nothing but a transaction.

If however one day should i get into an affair and feelings are involved then i will be at fault.

Take it easy and try to do as one of the bro's suggested, the get fit method. cos
1) you need that fitness anyways to handle your kids
2) you will feel good about yourself
3) women are like that, they say looks dont matter but in the end, if they see a hunk, they will still take a second glance.

Good luck dude.

some clean and fit advise here.

however i feel most woman do not know how often a man needs to release

[samyboys]

Anel King


I guess your faithfulness do not equals to intimacy from your wife.
Well if that is the case, try out what some brothers are advising you here and see how it goes. If nothing change, then u need to change.

Sometimes woman see faithfulness as a duty and not in exchange for intimacy.


Good luck

[brother69]

Bro, bring yr wife to a pub. Hv some drinks, talk to other girls in the pub infront of her. She lost her wildness after the marriage n kids. U need to spur her ups....U dress smart n she dress sexy......after a few drinks n touch her once a while......she will be on fire....enjoy

[Anel King]

Anel King

I guess your faithfulness do not equals to intimacy from your wife.
Well if that is the case, try out what some brothers are advising you here and see how it goes. If nothing change, then u need to change.

Sometimes woman see faithfulness as a duty and not in exchange for intimacy.

Good luck

Well bro

I have started th change by going to the gym to loose some weight and beer up the muscles to get her attracted to me again.

If that fails, i wont let all the hard work go down the drain. i'll show off my bod to ladies who like it.

But i am giving myself till end of the year with her.

Don't get me wrong. She is a great wife to be with. A wonderful mother to my kids. But our communication is screwed sometimes as we aren't intimide as i would want to be.

Honestly guys, I'm sure Many bro who have been hung dry and not have sex for a few weeks or months, tend to be unable to concentrate in work and be always on a short fuse. But always put up a false face of everything is alright.

I am going through that now. the last 2 or 3 months my work has been & still is suffering as concentration is damn low.

All i need, of every man needs is 1 or 2 good love sessions a week, then all problems can be solved. I dare to think even divorce rates will fall. Cause there will be no more tension, more communication and openness in the relationship.

But am going to continue to work hard, in the gym also, to keep the fire in my marriage before taking the next drastic step.

Regards
Anel King

[eeemen]

Well bro

........................

But am going to continue to work hard, in the gym also, to keep the fire in my marriage before taking the next drastic step.

Regards
Anel King

Good luck bro, all the best! Cheers .........

[Anel King]

Bro, bring yr wife to a pub. Hv some drinks, talk to other girls in the pub infront of her. She lost her wildness after the marriage n kids. U need to spur her ups....U dress smart n she dress sexy......after a few drinks n touch her once a while......she will be on fire....enjoy

Bro, thats and interesting idea.

Let me beef up the muscles in the gym 1st. Then i bring her to pubbing. get her jealous with all the girls coming to me then i will make her hot.

Good idea. but need to take abit of time to get there 1st.

Regards
Anel King

[The_Chef]

Keep fit, bro! :)

[hotspurs]

hi all. I guess this is a common issue for many bros considering numerous similar threads now and in the past. I have been married 10 yrs and have a 6 yo daughter. we hardly have sex, maybe 1-2 times a month many times when we do, she does it grudgingly, make me feel a begger. Sometimes i just fantasize about another girl and pump away or I just walk away. Things got quite bad as I resented her and would give her the cold shouler treatment. sometimes I get paranoid at times thinking she may be fucking around outside.
but I soon "saw the light". if she does not want sex and I need, just go find FL, fuck and pay up. for the past few years, I have been regular to HCs, KTVs, FLs. My thinking very simple - play, fuck whatever then at 6pm sharp, I go back to my wife & kid and we have dinner, shopping etc. This way, everybody happy. My wife not pressured and I don't resent her anymore. I find my mood much lighter since then and I enjoy my family time better. Although sex is important to me, my wife is an excellent mother, works hard to bring home $ too, respects my parents etc all these are impt in marriage too.

[analicious]

Hi Bro & Sis of SBF

I've been married for 4 1/2 years now. Before marriage I was active in Geylang and HC's almost every month 1 or 2 times. ONS also once in 1 month.

When I was dating my wife stop everything in Geylang & HC's. Only maximum was sucked her nipples, which surprised me as she was conservativebut she was the one who initiated it.

After marriage, we had sex almost every other day till our 1st child. During the 9 months, she didn’t allow me to even finger her below. 4 months after our 1st child we had sex. I was like a caged animal let loose. But we only had sex 1 a month.

Last year was out 3rd anniversary we had decent sex. The next 3 months we only had once a month till April she confirmed she was pregnant again. Again I got hung dry and DIY from April last year till 2 weeks ago.

Looks like I still won’t have sex whenever I want to cause she like not so interested to even start anything. But once we start, she wants to finish fast. And only missionary, from 1st day to today.

No matter what I try to tell her or what I do, she only what to have when she is ok and only in missionary, nothing else.

I don't want to head back to my old play grounds as that will tear the family apart. I am only a regular for JG in the Tuina shop in CV.

Was wondering if any experience bros & sis can advice.

Regards
Anel King

Hi bro i'm going through what you are going through and i tot my 3 weeks was bad but your's 3 years Even now i'm feeling bored of releasing on my own.:(
Same like you dont wish to go back to the old hunt.:D

Anyway i'm new here noe nothing abt this site until saw my friend log in and was surprised there such a site in sg but i like what i see now i'm into reading the stories here to pass time and forget abt going back to the old hunt .

Seriously the the story telling part . Now more into reading abt it rather than doing it .;)

Cheers everybody.

[samyboys]

Well bro

I have started th change by going to the gym to loose some weight and beer up the muscles to get her attracted to me again.

If that fails, i wont let all the hard work go down the drain. i'll show off my bod to ladies who like it.

But i am giving myself till end of the year with her.

Don't get me wrong. She is a great wife to be with. A wonderful mother to my kids. But our communication is screwed sometimes as we aren't intimide as i would want to be.

Honestly guys, I'm sure Many bro who have been hung dry and not have sex for a few weeks or months, tend to be unable to concentrate in work and be always on a short fuse. But always put up a false face of everything is alright.

I am going through that now. the last 2 or 3 months my work has been & still is suffering as concentration is damn low.

All i need, of every man needs is 1 or 2 good love sessions a week, then all problems can be solved. I dare to think even divorce rates will fall. Cause there will be no more tension, more communication and openness in the relationship.

But am going to continue to work hard, in the gym also, to keep the fire in my marriage before taking the next drastic step.

Regards
Anel King


u have a fairly reasonable time frame to see if its worth your efforts.

i tested my other half reaction earlier by relating some reasons quoted here why intimacy dies after marriage, esp after with kids as i am somehow in such a situation too.

my other half response was fast and defensive, "not happy can go outside eat, just don't get caught, everything takes 2 hands to clap" was her immediate replies.

after some discussion here and there, i could feel the topic was going no where and its just a finger pointing game, guys point at ladies, they point back. claiming housework, kids and two main reasons for draining them out. unless these chores are taken care of my maid, she got time to go shopping and do what she likes, she can be more physically available. else mentally and physically drained, no way she is into sex.
else men all the same, only wants sex from a 'tired woman' and never contribute to help.

for me case, at times i do help out to balance out the running of a household, but can never be within her expectations, so i have chosen at times to wash my hands of certain chores. just like she has her way with the kid, she will 'complain' about the way i take care of the kid. the kid as a result side with her more as a result.

in conclusion, i feel such intimacy decline happens in most married with children situation. most woman do not really look deep enough to work things out. they expect us to share work load with them in exchange for intimacy, which i feel is wrong. workload and intimacy should not be bundled together. and maybe men are also more physical animals compared to women who are more emotional and mental type.

live and let live - i would seek my own solutions than to be feeling disappointed and allow my happiness to be controlled by others/situation
we adjust ourselves to the environment and not expect it the other way round

[sgboy89]

Well Bro

I have recently started to work out in California Fitness with a trainer. Will see the result in 2 months time.

Hopefully it works.

Regards
Anel King

bro how much you paying per month? package or what?? sorry to hijack this thread ~.~ off topic

[bossy_miaomiao]

Anel King

Situation sound familiar to me... :o

My suggestions:

1-Since not short handed in taking care kid, try not let kid sleep with your room, to create a love nest for 2 of you only

2-Talk to her again

will try to write more during weekend...

Guo Lai Ren :o

[deptrai4u]

Bro

Although what ever you said sounded funny, but I think it sounds very correct.


So I am lost again and might end up in my playground again and follow what you mentioned:



Let me unfold the whole thing in completion for ur perusal. I will type slowly so that u can really understand it clearly.

Somehow most (I would not say all, but most here means anything between 98 to 99%) feels that sex after kids is really what the chinese saying "draw snake add legs". In fact if a whole bunch of mummies get together, the talking topic will be kids, or shopping, fashion, and if 1 of them says "and I still like very much about making love with my husband", do you know what will happed to her???? She will immediately be seen as out-cast and will not be invited for the next group outing. I am not making this out, this has been written in one of the magazine before (either Female or Her World kind of mag).

IMHO, there is NO WAY to escape from this for those who married the 98 to 99% of Singapore girls... u can take whatever precautions but u will get into this trap 98 to 99% of the time. Some brudders here have suggest various ways.. such as :

1. To know if she likes sex before marrying her
2. Dun let her do too much housework, otherwise she tired and stressed
3. Plan time away from kids..
4. The stupid list goes on...

Let me tell u the facts... my wife (by default referring to the Singapore one.... I still got a few others outside of Singapore by the way..) before marriage, we quite active sexually.. after marriage, very active quarreling (as a means of communication, which is still ok), and a lot less sex.. after 1st kid, 1 more time and kenna 2nd kid and no more.... and that was 6 years ago.

Most of my friends go thru this... kids stick to mummy, mummy sleeps in kids room ... etc.. and then SUDDENLY when kids reach teens, they usually dun want mummy anymore.. that is when trouble starts... wify by then either late 30s or early 40s, she suddenly want the husbands again.. by then husbands used to greener pastures already and dun want old vege anymore.. guess wat happens??? Divorce!

By the way, my wife (the default one) does not have to work.. house got maid, no need to worry about money as every month I gave her a lot more than the average income of Singaporean (>$3k) to spend. Even bought her a car at a point in time until 1 day damn fucking frustrated with her, sold it! So if u look at the check list above... even if u check everything on that list the wife reserved the rights to add couple more things to the list without prior notice one!

From what u wrote, i can tell that u are probably age 30-35. If u talk to people who are 45-50... especially those travelling biz people, u will see what I mean.

So nowadays, when some young men tells me they are going to ROM with their Singapore gf.. i tell them ROM = Registry Of Mistake. I even tell them dun ever invite me to their wedding if they are marrying a Singapore girl.. because it will be no different from attending their funeral...

Since u have already married a Singapore girl (my deepest condolences to you), i suggest that u should live ur life in such a way that u will have little regret if you should die in ur sleep tonight and not wake up tomorrow. Go for what u think u deserve, but try not to jeopardize the family... and trust me that this is a lot easier and better than to try to convince ur wife that u need sex to stay sane.

As the saying goes, what kind of wife a man wants.. well, they want:
a wife that can cook
a wife that bear child and take good care of the child
a wife that is good in bed
and a wife that is like a best friend..
I really took that advice and so now I have 4.

[pottter58]

Hi Bro

why do you discuss wif wife on tie up the so that it would be safer on sex with each other. at least she won't get prenant... oop spelling mistake...
btw it safe when before birth tell doc so that yo wont have to pay extra.

Then both of you can enjoy sex again. lah

[Anel King]

hi all. I guess this is a common issue for many bros considering numerous similar threads now and in the past. I have been married 10 yrs and have a 6 yo daughter. we hardly have sex, maybe 1-2 times a month many times when we do, she does it grudgingly, make me feel a begger. Sometimes i just fantasize about another girl and pump away or I just walk away. Things got quite bad as I resented her and would give her the cold shouler treatment. sometimes I get paranoid at times thinking she may be fucking around outside.
but I soon "saw the light". if she does not want sex and I need, just go find FL, fuck and pay up. for the past few years, I have been regular to HCs, KTVs, FLs. My thinking very simple - play, fuck whatever then at 6pm sharp, I go back to my wife & kid and we have dinner, shopping etc. This way, everybody happy. My wife not pressured and I don't resent her anymore. I find my mood much lighter since then and I enjoy my family time better. Although sex is important to me, my wife is an excellent mother, works hard to bring home $ too, respects my parents etc all these are impt in marriage too.

Bro Chef, thanks for the encouragement.

Bro hotspurs,

Even though we are in the same boat, at least you get 1-2 in a month, i only got 1 in the last year.

I am not much of a good liar and i don't know if i can hide the fact the i am going to meet women outside for a f**k time. Plus financially i may not be able to sustain as of yet. (Take home is only 2.5K. have to pay loan for house)

The more i read you brothers responses here, the more i think i might just end up in the old playgrounds or look for a cheap FB. (Nothing is free right bros)

But bro, there is so much of similarities i see in you with me, especially the last sentence about your wife.

I just hope things turn out better in a few months.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Hi bro i'm going through what you are going through and i tot my 3 weeks was bad but your's 3 years Even now i'm feeling bored of releasing on my own.:(
Same like you dont wish to go back to the old hunt.:D

Anyway i'm new here noe nothing abt this site until saw my friend log in and was surprised there such a site in sg but i like what i see now i'm into reading the stories here to pass time and forget abt going back to the old hunt .

Seriously the the story telling part . Now more into reading abt it rather than doing it .;)

Cheers everybody.
Hi Bro
My sympathies with you as well.

I was actually a follower of Sammyboy since it was in delphi forums, more than 12 years ago. My user id was Anaconda. (had a number of posting as well as starting the PB HC Girls thread, as i was a regular in PB HC.)

When i was dating my wife, i stop logging on to the forum in 2005. At the same time, stop going to the playground. After my 1 st child when sex took a nose dive, in joined back SBF, but could not get back my old ID, so reregistered. Only for JG, to read stories & see he pics in the free section. (Similar like why you came here.)

But it is getting harder to avoid going back to the old playground.

But am hopping for the better. And hope the best for you as well.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

u have a fairly reasonable time frame to see if its worth your efforts.

.............................

live and let live - i would seek my own solutions than to be feeling disappointed and allow my happiness to be controlled by others/situation
we adjust ourselves to the environment and not expect it the other way round

Bro samyboys

I hope that it will work out by the end of the year.

I agree with you last line with a minor tweak to it. We adjust ourselves to the environment and not expect it the other way round, to make our lives better or worse.

If i decide to cheong the old playgrounds with my wifes consent, it can make me happy, but need to see how the family reacts.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

bro how much you paying per month? package or what?? sorry to hijack this thread ~.~ off topic

Well bro

All you need to do is negotiate as low as you want. Dont settle for the 1st price they give you. even if you have to sit 1 hr just do it. they will get tired and give you the bottom price they can, and not what they want.

That is what i did and i got a very good deal. With instructor of course.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Anel King

Situation sound familiar to me... :o

My suggestions:

1-Since not short handed in taking care kid, try not let kid sleep with your room, to create a love nest for 2 of you only

2-Talk to her again

will try to write more during weekend...

Guo Lai Ren :o

Bro

Suggestion 1; Tried so many times, but both mother and daughter not letting go of each other. son sleeps in the cort.

Suggestion 2; Will try again in 2-3months time when my body is toned and muscular. Hope to lure her back.

Will be waiting for you post.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Let me unfold the whole thing in completion for ur perusal. I will type slowly so that u can really understand it clearly.

.............................

As the saying goes, what kind of wife a man wants.. well, they want:
a wife that can cook
a wife that bear child and take good care of the child
a wife that is good in bed
and a wife that is like a best friend..
I really took that advice and so now I have 4.

Bro, I like you lah. Very Direct.

On your 2nd Paragraph, her friends and cousins are opposite. they are actually encouraging her to her a 3rd child, but she is resisting.

My 2nd kid is just 8 months, so i pray i don't get hung dry. But from active sex to active quarreling, we are the same. And hopefully i don't get to even speak or think about divorce.

I'm not as lucky as you on the money part but i have decent income and to give her what she needs.

I am 31, going to be 32 in Oct. Just for everyones info, i am a Bhaiyi with turban and beard. And i travel to China almost every month and to Africa 2-3 times a year.

On the Rom part, i have joked with my friends before, "Why you want to commit suicide by jumping into the well and have a onegina policy(one vagina)." But i know what you are talking about.

I accept you condolences half heartedly. Like i said earlier, if i cant convince her in a couple of months time, i will look for greener pastures discreetly, like you have.

If i fail, then i hope to be like you, 4 wives.

Thanks Bro

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Hi Bro

why do you discuss wif wife on tie up the so that it would be safer on sex with each other. at least she won't get prenant... oop spelling mistake...
btw it safe when before birth tell doc so that yo wont have to pay extra.

Then both of you can enjoy sex again. lah

Hi Bro

She actually want to tie up, but i would like to have 1 more before that.

And it's not about getting pregnant that she is worried about. She don't know how to delegate baby work and trust others, including me and family members, to take care of the kids. if she can do this, then i think i will have so much better chance.

Regards
Anel King

[unger]

Bro TS,

I have quite some lady friends whom we talk openly. I understand from them,
that some women, after birth, will lose interest in sex. They become very dry
, even with KY.

Personally i felt that singapore women, not all, tend to be too, overly self-centered. Like one of the brother here said, His wife commented, "not happly eat outside........." see, women tend to say this but when they file for divorce, this are things they used against you, but alway forgooten that they have neglected their husband, and they think it is legal and right. They think they are there just to bare the family 1 or 2 kids and they have done their duty. So they are not for their husband to f*&k.

I do feel sorry for you and those suffering the consequences.

My advise to all brothers out there, try to talk to your wife to solve the problem. Once you head back to your younger days, it will be harder for you to walk out again. And it will be more frequence than you used to do. Not forgetting the money is different, You have to bring home and you have to pay out.

[Anel King]

Bro TS,

I have quite some lady friends whom we talk openly. I understand from them,
that some women, after birth, will lose interest in sex. They become very dry
, even with KY.

.................................................. ............................

My advise to all brothers out there, try to talk to your wife to solve the problem. Once you head back to your younger days, it will be harder for you to walk out again. And it will be more frequence than you used to do. Not forgetting the money is different, You have to bring home and you have to pay out.

Hi Bro

Interesting fact. But, like i said earlier, a few weeks back i had 1 session with my wife(after a year), when i fingered her, she got really, really wet. Not to mention, the next few days we were all happy and work was good for me.

Like you say, touch wood, if things take a turn for the worse, divorce, then she can use everything against me. So have to be very careful.

Will try talking to her soon.

Regards
Anel King

[yang punk]

Women are so fucking strange...own husband don't want but other's husband than want!

Why I say this? Cos my experience similar. Wife when busy climbing career ladder and caring for 2 kids (with my help of cos) was not interested in sex. Had to pcc myself whilst sleeping next to her! Until I connected with an office wife. She was married with 2 kids and a busy husband. So we took care of each other at the end of each work day and both go home to our respective families happy.

Even after the relationship ended cordially (she was transferred to another office) I had no problem finding another replacement. Another married woman with busy bizman husband. So no sex at home but got sex in the office! Can't complain.

But funny thing ... now with one foot in the grave wifee wants intimacy but I am not interested!

[laudiko]

mine only allow sex every 2 weeks....so consider lucky???

[Anel King]

Women are so fucking strange...own husband don't want but other's husband than want!
...................

But funny thing ... now with one foot in the grave wifee wants intimacy but I am not interested!

Bro
I think you might be on to something. Why can't all the sexually active people meet each other, while those who are dormant meet each other. Then they can enjoy each other better because they know what to expect from each other.

But like the saying goes, opposites attract. So the attraction must be really good not to divorce. And in some cases, still can eat outside & come home to wife as a good hubby.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

mine only allow sex every 2 weeks....so consider lucky???

Brother,

Compare with many of us here, You Si Beh Heng Ch**Bye F***ing Lucky ah!!!

Regards
Anel King

[samyboys]

Women are so fucking strange...own husband don't want but other's husband than want!

Why I say this? Cos my experience similar. Wife when busy climbing career ladder and caring for 2 kids (with my help of cos) was not interested in sex. Had to pcc myself whilst sleeping next to her! Until I connected with an office wife. She was married with 2 kids and a busy husband. So we took care of each other at the end of each work day and both go home to our respective families happy.

Even after the relationship ended cordially (she was transferred to another office) I had no problem finding another replacement. Another married woman with busy bizman husband. So no sex at home but got sex in the office! Can't complain.

But funny thing ... now with one foot in the grave wifee wants intimacy but I am not interested!


u are lucky that u got back up, wished i were u

[ch18]

Sigh..... Seemed that many Bros here are on the same ship....

[Rickey]

Women are so fucking strange...own husband don't want but other's husband than want!

Why I say this? Cos my experience similar. Wife when busy climbing career ladder and caring for 2 kids (with my help of cos) was not interested in sex. Had to pcc myself whilst sleeping next to her! Until I connected with an office wife. She was married with 2 kids and a busy husband. So we took care of each other at the end of each work day and both go home to our respective families happy.

Even after the relationship ended cordially (she was transferred to another office) I had no problem finding another replacement. Another married woman with busy bizman husband. So no sex at home but got sex in the office! Can't complain.





Let me unfold the whole thing in completion for ur perusal. I will type slowly so that u can really understand it clearly.

Somehow most (I would not say all, but most here means anything between 98 to 99%) feels that sex after kids is really what the chinese saying "draw snake add legs". In fact if a whole bunch of mummies get together, the talking topic will be kids, or shopping, fashion, and if 1 of them says "and I still like very much about making love with my husband", do you know what will happed to her???? She will immediately be seen as out-cast and will not be invited for the next group outing. I am not making this out, this has been written in one of the magazine before (either Female or Her World kind of mag).

IMHO, there is NO WAY to escape from this for those who married the 98 to 99% of Singapore girls... u can take whatever precautions but u will get into this trap 98 to 99% of the time. ..

Let me tell u the facts... my wife (by default referring to the Singapore one.... I still got a few others outside of Singapore by the way..) before marriage, we quite active sexually.. after marriage, very active quarreling (as a means of communication, which is still ok), and a lot less sex.. after 1st kid, 1 more time and kenna 2nd kid and no more.... and that was 6 years ago.

Most of my friends go thru this... kids stick to mummy, mummy sleeps in kids room ... etc.. and then SUDDENLY when kids reach teens, they usually dun want mummy anymore.. that is when trouble starts... wify by then either late 30s or early 40s, she suddenly want the husbands again.. by then husbands used to greener pastures already and dun want old vege anymore.. guess wat happens??? Divorce!

So nowadays, when some young men tells me they are going to ROM with their Singapore gf.. i tell them ROM = Registry Of Mistake. I even tell them dun ever invite me to their wedding if they are marrying a Singapore girl.. because it will be no different from attending their funeral...

Since u have already married a Singapore girl (my deepest condolences to you), i suggest that u should live ur life in such a way that u will have little regret if you should die in ur sleep tonight and not wake up tomorrow. Go for what u think u deserve, but try not to jeopardize the family... and trust me that this is a lot easier and better than to try to convince ur wife that u need sex to stay sane.





I have quite some lady friends whom we talk openly. I understand from them,
that some women, after birth, will lose interest in sex. They become very dry
, even with KY.

Personally i felt that singapore women, not all, tend to be too, overly self-centered. Like one of the brother here said, His wife commented, "not happly eat outside........." see, women tend to say this but when they file for divorce, this are things they used against you, but alway forgooten that they have neglected their husband, and they think it is legal and right. They think they are there just to bare the family 1 or 2 kids and they have done their duty. So they are not for their husband to f*&k.

I do feel sorry for you and those suffering the consequences.

My advise to all brothers out there, try to talk to your wife to solve the problem.

Looks like there are no other better ways out for most of us bros here than to look for FLs or FBs etc. Our OCs seems to be all the same as mentioned by bros above.

When will they ( and the likely up and coming potential 1s ) ever learn to treat their husbands as lovers rather than children long after the wedding day. They all seems to fall into the same trap. The very moment all of them are able to do so, the world's oldest profession will cease to survive..

And its no point trying to talk to them, they are simply not interested in sex anymore.... the econ principle of diminishing returns applies beginning from day 1 (wedding day) to having 1 child after another til .... sigh. Actually 1 can say tat almost every wedding we see today will end up in tis sad situation...just a matter of time, ....and more so if they are SG gal and holding high position and high salary jobs. The risks are yours to take....

So beware bros, be warned.....think hard before u walk down tat aisle and say "i do" wif whoever tat gal is. An Angel b4 marriage can turn into a Devil after. And once said, its irreversible !!.... Now i know why many pple choose to remain single...sigh

[ch18]

An angel b4 marriage can turn into a devil after. And once said, its irreversible !!....

This is so damn RIGHT leh......

[Anel King]

Sigh..... Seemed that many Bros here are on the same ship....
Yes bro, yes we are in the Same Ship!!!!

An angel b4 marriage can turn into a devil after. And once said, its irreversible !!....

This is so damn RIGHT leh......

Well bro, sort of right.

For me is
A boy who became a Devil in School & NS.
Then an Angel during Courtship and Marriage.
Now am getting a call from the Devil to come back again.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Looks like there are no other better ways out for most of us bros here than to look for FLs or FBs etc. Our OCs seems to be all the same as mentioned by bros above.
-------------------------------------------
So beware bros, be warned.....think hard before u walk down tat aisle and say "i do" wif whoever tat gal is. An Angel b4 marriage can turn into a Devil after. And once said, its irreversible !!.... Now i know why many pple choose to remain single...sigh

Bro, Very well said.

And I am beginning to agree with with what most brothers here say. But it's like a bitter pill to swallow. It's still stuck in my tonsils, but starting to slip down to my throat.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Hi Sistas of SBF

I would like to get some of you views as well. At least we will know what the females think as well.

I am really hoping to work thing out with my wife before I finally conclude that if I fail, the playground is always there for me.

Would really appreaciate if the Sisters here can join in the discussion.

Regards
Anel King

[sgiceboy]

guess lots of bros in the same state.. no sex after kids...

is this a growing trend?

like i says life still goes... sex or no sex...

FL, HC, PCC..... its all up to you....

[samyboys]

there's hardly any ladies around here

[kgbkgb]

whoah. i'm surprised so many women are disinterested in sex. Mine dun mind to have it evryday. I have an intimate female fren who also said she doesnt mind evryday.

[kgbkgb]

1 more thing i notice is this. Women tend to be disinterested in sex if interval is too long. The more frequent it is, the more she becomes interested. TS might wanna try this out

[tomvoyeur]

whoah. i'm surprised so many women are disinterested in sex. Mine dun mind to have it evryday. I have an intimate female fren who also said she doesnt mind evryday.

Women like sex too. They just did not find the right man. So to all husbands - be wary when ur wife is not interested in having sex with u - they just released it somewhere else. ;)

[Anel King]

whoah. i'm surprised so many women are disinterested in sex. Mine dun mind to have it evryday. I have an intimate female fren who also said she doesnt mind evryday.

Bro

Thats what they all say before Marriage. But the reality come after marriage. As you can see from all the responses in this thread and others.

1 more thing i notice is this. Women tend to be disinterested in sex if interval is too long. The more frequent it is, the more she becomes interested. TS might wanna try this out

That might be true if they don't have kids. Unless other bros can say otherwise.

Regards
Anel King

[tkwok]

i think all the brother who commented are right.

But the staying fit one actually helps the most. i am currently training myself up in my own gym. and i noticed, if u are fitter, more girls will be attracted to you. Be it old or young ladies, u will feel good.

Then once u are fitter, slimmer, you will see the difference.

I did that with my ex g-f before. i used to be 100kg and i drop till 68. now i go back to 80 -_-.

my plan is to go back to 68kg in 3 months time.

[PepperO]

Hi Sistas of SBF

I would like to get some of you views as well. At least we will know what the females think as well.

I am really hoping to work thing out with my wife before I finally conclude that if I fail, the playground is always there for me.

Would really appreaciate if the Sisters here can join in the discussion.

Regards
Anel King

Hi TS,

As a woman, I think there is no easy way out. Both parties have to work at it - putting time aside for each other, trying new things together to spice things up.. perhaps you can try talking it out with your wife?

[Anel King]

i think all the brother who commented are right.

But the staying fit one actually helps the most. i am currently training myself up in my own gym. and i noticed, if u are fitter, more girls will be attracted to you. Be it old or young ladies, u will feel good.

Then once u are fitter, slimmer, you will see the difference.

I did that with my ex g-f before. i used to be 100kg and i drop till 68. now i go back to 80 -_-.

my plan is to go back to 68kg in 3 months time.

Bro

That's 1 reason i start to go to the Gym. I have a big Bhayi body. So if i can loose fats and gain muscle, weight come down by 20kg. Can already.

I envy you (Especially Chinese) can go down below 75 sia)

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Hi TS,

As a woman, I think there is no easy way out. Both parties have to work at it - putting time aside for each other, trying new things together to spice things up.. perhaps you can try talking it out with your wife?

Hi Sis.

Finally a female prospective to shed light on this issue.

I am trying my best to slowly talk to her. will need abit more time. Same time i am going to the gym to beef up some muscle to woo her as well.

Spice things up... HHMMMM!!!

Can advice please. So far from marriage till now, she only like Missionary, once in a while Cow Girl (other she don't want to try). BJ she hardly give, may be not used to it (I wash & clean my small head nicely.)
Likes me painting her upper body but not waist down, including her pussy. She feel not clean. We used to bath together, but ever since the kids came, no chance.

Any other way to spice things up.

Thanks in advance sis.

Regards
Anel King

[adrx]

Hi Sis.

Finally a female prospective to shed light on this issue.

I am trying my best to slowly talk to her. will need abit more time. Same time i am going to the gym to beef up some muscle to woo her as well.

Spice things up... HHMMMM!!!

Can advice please. So far from marriage till now, she only like Missionary, once in a while Cow Girl (other she don't want to try). BJ she hardly give, may be not used to it (I wash & clean my small head nicely.)
Likes me painting her upper body but not waist down, including her pussy. She feel not clean. We used to bath together, but ever since the kids came, no chance.

Any other way to spice things up.

Thanks in advance sis.

Regards
Anel King


u can paint her waist down.. but probably after a bath... or early morning... 30 min before alarm sounds....

if not, bring her to the holiday... and have a good one at night before sleep.. then attack her virginal in the morning at a 69 pose...

who knows.. :D

[adrx]

Bro, thats and interesting idea.

Let me beef up the muscles in the gym 1st. Then i bring her to pubbing. get her jealous with all the girls coming to me then i will make her hot.

Good idea. but need to take abit of time to get there 1st.

Regards
Anel King


dont make her jealous... that's make her more inferior.. i tried that.. worse!!!

I bet she bother about her figure.... how about do some of cycling with your kid (old enough?) and ur wife?

[Anel King]

u can paint her waist down.. but probably after a bath... or early morning... 30 min before alarm sounds....

if not, bring her to the holiday... and have a good one at night before sleep.. then attack her virginal in the morning at a 69 pose...

who knows.. :D
Hi Bro
Like i said, she won't even let me go below her tummy. So it will be very difficult. Somemore the kids are in the room.

Holiday, i tried to ask plan to go, but she force to cancel. But am planning again so and this time no give chance, will attack her terok terok.

dont make her jealous... that's make her more inferior.. i tried that.. worse!!!

I bet she bother about her figure.... how about do some of cycling with your kid (old enough?) and ur wife?


She is a little concious about her self, but she been chasing me to work our for some time already. So hope it would be worth it and make her happy.

Regards
Anel King

[adrx]

Hi Bro
Like i said, she won't even let me go below her tummy. So it will be very difficult. Somemore the kids are in the room.

Holiday, i tried to ask plan to go, but she force to cancel. But am planning again so and this time no give chance, will attack her terok terok.




She is a little concious about her self, but she been chasing me to work our for some time already. So hope it would be worth it and make her happy.

Regards
Anel King

if kids are in the rm, its virtually impossible....she do not wan to 'pollute' the kids...

work out together will enhance your relationship or probbaly 'simulate'...

same as my wife..chasing me to workout....Normally she dont mind wearing (she had a topless sun bathing during our honeymoon) .. but due to her figure out abit.. dont wear it anymore... :mad:

probably urs and are similar to mine.. plan and get some workouts.... u never know... ;) Beside that, workout together will definitely improve your communications...

[Spanner]

Bro.....
I too went through the same problems as you....

2 years ago, things got out of hand and i hit her.

But thanks to God, we somehow found a way.

We went to a Marriage Encounter which is under the Non-Profit Catholic Group. It is open for all races and religion.

They do not talk about Jesus and God. Purely on how to have a stronger and better marriage.

At 1st, i thought it must be some boring stuff..... BOY....! How wrong i am.....
Today, my wife and me has changed so much in just that short period of 2 yrs.

My wife who nevers low cut or short dress has started doing that. And during the weekends, when my wife always have a hard time waking me up, she will give me a wet and slup slup blowjob and i usually ended up raping her.... haha.....

Although sex is not as much as during our dating time, but it is so much better than when after we have our 1st child.

Of course we continue to have our weekly counselling after the Marriage Encounter. A daily quarrels has become weekly sex for us.

I'm not here to promote this Marriage Encounter, and neither i am an active member. But i just want to share what this has helped us.

Oh by the way, we went for this, which is held every 1st weekend of the month, there were only about 6 or 7 Catholic couples out of 30 couples.

At end of the day, i always believe that's always a positive way out of every problem. Take care bro and hope you can pull out of this with your beloved wife.

This is the link for the Marriage Encounter:
http://marriage-encounter-sg.org/index.php

P/S: You can always pm me if you need more informations.;)

[Anel King]

if kids are in the rm, its virtually impossible....she do not wan to 'pollute' the kids...

work out together will enhance your relationship or probbaly 'simulate'...

same as my wife..chasing me to workout....Normally she dont mind wearing (she had a topless sun bathing during our honeymoon) .. but due to her figure out abit.. dont wear it anymore... :mad:

probably urs and are similar to mine.. plan and get some workouts.... u never know... ;) Beside that, workout together will definitely improve your communications...

Bro
That can only work if she can leave the kids and join me.

The main problem is that she clings on to the kids and not enough time spent with me. then she blame me for not enough time with her.

Shape wise, she is ok, B- breast. but big thighs and hip. I like.

Will work for better life with her.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Bro.....
I too went through the same problems as you....
.................................................. .......

At end of the day, i always believe that's always a positive way out of every problem. Take care bro and hope you can pull out of this with your beloved wife.

This is the link for the Marriage Encounter:
http://marriage-encounter-sg.org/index.php

P/S: You can always pm me if you need more informations.;)

Hi Bro

Seems like a good advice. Might look at this in a few months time if we can't solve it on our own.

Thanks

Regards
Anel King

[adrx]

Bro
That can only work if she can leave the kids and join me.

The main problem is that she clings on to the kids and not enough time spent with me. then she blame me for not enough time with her.

Shape wise, she is ok, B- breast. but big thighs and hip. I like.

Will work for better life with her.

Regards
Anel King

hmm... tell her straight to the face...go direct.. but in a calmly manner.. she need time for u... once a while, should leave the kids alone.. better still, put the kids on the hand of mother-in-law.... even just a day... preferably 2-3 days...

[PepperO]

Hi Sis.

Finally a female prospective to shed light on this issue.

I am trying my best to slowly talk to her. will need abit more time. Same time i am going to the gym to beef up some muscle to woo her as well.

Spice things up... HHMMMM!!!

Can advice please. So far from marriage till now, she only like Missionary, once in a while Cow Girl (other she don't want to try). BJ she hardly give, may be not used to it (I wash & clean my small head nicely.)
Likes me painting her upper body but not waist down, including her pussy. She feel not clean. We used to bath together, but ever since the kids came, no chance.

Any other way to spice things up.

Thanks in advance sis.

Regards
Anel King

Hi bro.. I can understand your situation 'cos I also have 2 kids. Recently, HB and I ended up making out in the living room after the maid and kids were asleep in their rooms. It was thrilling and exciting, trying to keep myself from moaning too loud. :p

I guess it's about knowing what makes your wife tick.. or horny, in this case. :)

[sexualfantasi]

Hi Sis.

Finally a female prospective to shed light on this issue.

I am trying my best to slowly talk to her. will need abit more time. Same time i am going to the gym to beef up some muscle to woo her as well.

Spice things up... HHMMMM!!!

Can advice please. So far from marriage till now, she only like Missionary, once in a while Cow Girl (other she don't want to try). BJ she hardly give, may be not used to it (I wash & clean my small head nicely.)
Likes me painting her upper body but not waist down, including her pussy. She feel not clean. We used to bath together, but ever since the kids came, no chance.

Any other way to spice things up.

Thanks in advance sis.

Regards
Anel King

Bro, sometimes it is not doing things that you like but things she like.
she says you not spending time with her, means she wants to spend some quality time with you (maybe together with your kids)

[bossy_miaomiao]

1 more thing i notice is this. Women tend to be disinterested in sex if interval is too long. The more frequent it is, the more she becomes interested.

You are rite !!

Man, take note of this.. the frequent it is, the more we became interested and surely addict to it.. *shy :p

[bossy_miaomiao]

Hi Sis.

Finally a female prospective to shed light on this issue.

I am trying my best to slowly talk to her. will need abit more time. Same time i am going to the gym to beef up some muscle to woo her as well.

Spice things up... HHMMMM!!!

Can advice please. So far from marriage till now, she only like Missionary, once in a while Cow Girl (other she don't want to try). BJ she hardly give, may be not used to it (I wash & clean my small head nicely.)
Likes me painting her upper body but not waist down, including her pussy. She feel not clean. We used to bath together, but ever since the kids came, no chance.

Any other way to spice things up.


Give her compliments, lady love it... such as " sexy, nice, this dress fit you, you look great today, you make me think of doing with you dear.... etc" make her feel good, comfortable and may turn her on.

Perhaps I know her feeling well, lady turn to low sex drive. Busy with kids and tired are reasons, BUT mainly caused lack of confident after giving birth.. we need sometimes and expect to receive compliment, confirm and assurance to re-gain the confidence to our figure, as well as to turn on sex drive.

[bossy_miaomiao]

...same as my wife..chasing me to workout....Normally she dont mind wearing (she had a topless sun bathing during our honeymoon) .. but due to her figure out abit.. dont wear it anymore...


same here, after gave birth, figure out abit... don't even go swimming anymore.. feel lousy..

but now, re-built my confidence and had brought few bikinis during HK trip.. will put on and show off killing body again.. (although not slim as previous, but the important is i feel confidence to myself) ;)

thus, give her continuouesly compliment and encouragement.. sure will work it !!

[bossy_miaomiao]

Hi Sis.
..... Spice things up... HHMMMM!!!

Can advice please. So far from marriage till now, she only like Missionary, once in a while Cow Girl (other she don't want to try). BJ she hardly give, may be not used to it (I wash & clean my small head nicely.)
Likes me painting her upper body but not waist down, including her pussy. She feel not clean. We used to bath together, but ever since the kids came, no chance.

Any other way to spice things up.


try to seduce her, like clean shaven yourself if you never did that... sure will attract her attention.

try to naked / with only a towel around your waist after shower.. hug her from her back and kiss her, might turn her on.. * personally i like the feeling :D, feel loving, caring and sexy..

During pregnancy, small baby/kid around really make lady's sex drive low, pls bear a bit it is due to "act of hormones". When kid growth elder, lady turn to more horny and would try out whatever pattern you name. Trust me, by time can't promise horny for you or others?

[Rickey]

whoah. i'm surprised so many women are disinterested in sex. Mine dun mind to have it evryday. I have an intimate female fren who also said she doesnt mind evryday.

Women like sex too. They just did not find the right man. So to all husbands - be wary when ur wife is not interested in having sex with u - they just released it somewhere else. ;)

Yes above-mentioned bros are rite....women do like sex and as bro kgbkgb said some even want it everyday !!. But tis applies to the young married ones from teens to say 50 yo, to those just married, recently married etc.

BUT when the novelty is over and as they age and age catches up wif them, they begin to lose interest in sex esp after the children come along wif its attendant problems, tis is when it spells trouble for the marriage. HBs are being rebuffed and refused sex by their OCs for all the various reasons they give, some of which are of course valid. But watever it is, it all boils down to the fact tat they are no longer interested to have sex with their HBs anymore, they have other interests or other better things to do or life's matters to attend to. So most of us bros here and outside of SBF are left stranded n the problems we are having wif our OCs are at tis stage... perhaps tis is no one's fault, we are made by nature tis way...

As i hav mentioned, tis is somewat like the econ principle of diminishing returns in operation. I tink Nature has a big part to play in tis and the high divorce stats tell part of if not the whole story. I tink we cant expect all 60, 70, or 80 yo women to be still interested in sex even if they are still healthy. Tis is nature, we can't change nature, we hav to accept tat they no longer want to have sex at a certain point of time in their lives.....when and at wat age depends on the individual, but the ceassation of sex and the consequent likely break-up will happen 1 day if HBs cannot continue to command the love n respect of their OCs. even for the best of reasons

Sigh...wat a difficult and problematic world we live in.....:(

[SeaKing]

Wonder if this problem only happened to Asian women?
Always not interested in sex after giving birth.....

I stayed in the States for about 7 years and the Ang Mo women don't seem to have this problem....
Still super active even they are already like 40 years old (though they usually looked much older....)

[freezetheDB]

I think its a natural outcome eventually as we humans tend to get bored of the same thing.

For me the main reason for staying off the playground is if one day my dick cannot perform, will I want my gf/wife/SO to go outside and play?

I still have sex with gf but not as frequent. Living together seem to kill that urgency to have sex compared to when not living together. You think you have all the time in the world at home but then you get tired from other stuff like work or other serious hobbies.

Trying my best to stay loyal. Only time will tell if the beast within me force itself out of my skin.

[PepperO]

Wonder if this problem only happened to Asian women?
Always not interested in sex after giving birth....

Actually, I think it really depends on the individual.. For me, I actually find my sex drive higher after giving birth to 2 kids. :p

[Rickey]

Wonder if this problem only happened to Asian women?
Always not interested in sex after giving birth.....

I stayed in the States for about 7 years and the Ang Mo women don't seem to have this problem....
Still super active even they are already like 40 years old (though they usually looked much older....)

Actually, I think it really depends on the individual.. For me, I actually find my sex drive higher after giving birth to 2 kids. :p

Rite again, sis PepperO is correct in her statement above. It is fortunate for us to know tat she is 1 of the few special women who hav HSD, lucky hubby !! But for the larger conservative majority, they simply lose interest in sex esp after the babies come....maybe to them they tink they hav done their NS to bear children.....wat more do u want from them, har ??....now other life's matters interest them more... sigh

And i believe bro Seaking is oso rite too. The Ang Mohs are in general more open to and love to hav sex more than their Asian counterparts esp the European women, i heard..

[Rickey]

try to seduce her, like clean shaven yourself if you never did that... sure will attract her attention.

try to naked / with only a towel around your waist after shower.. hug her from her back and kiss her, might turn her on.. * personally i like the feeling :D, feel loving, caring and sexy..

During pregnancy, small baby/kid around really make lady's sex drive low, pls bear a bit it is due to "act of hormones". When kid growth elder, lady turn to more horny and would try out whatever pattern you name. Trust me, by time can't promise horny for you or others?

Thanks for your many good suggestions, sis bossy_miaomiao. But many bros/sis here n elsewhere i believe, hav tried them and others in the books but regrettably none were able to turn their partners on... they seem to be as hard as stone..:( But its good tat sis miaomiao is an understanding lady who can appreciate and enjoy sex wif HSD. There's another Lucky hubby again !!

[bossy_miaomiao]

Thanks for your many good suggestions, sis bossy_miaomiao. But many bros/sis here n elsewhere i believe, hav tried them and others in the books but regrettably none were able to turn their partners on... they seem to be as hard as stone..:( But its good tat sis miaomiao is an understanding lady who can appreciate and enjoy sex wif HSD. There's another Lucky hubby again !!


:rolleyes: now the lucky one is my BF.. :D:D

[Anel King]

hmm... tell her straight to the face...go direct.. but in a calmly manner.. she need time for u... once a while, should leave the kids alone.. better still, put the kids on the hand of mother-in-law.... even just a day... preferably 2-3 days...

Well Bro

Thats already in the pipeline. In a weeks time. Will keep updated

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Hi bro.. I can understand your situation 'cos I also have 2 kids. Recently, HB and I ended up making out in the living room after the maid and kids were asleep in their rooms. It was thrilling and exciting, trying to keep myself from moaning too loud. :p

I guess it's about knowing what makes your wife tick.. or horny, in this case. :)

Hi Sis

Lucky you and your Hubby.

Am still trying to find out what makes my wife Horny though. I might have found it but need a confirmation

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Bro, sometimes it is not doing things that you like but things she like.
she says you not spending time with her, means she wants to spend some quality time with you (maybe together with your kids)

Bro

I honestly think that my wife & me are both guilty on this.

She spends alot of time with the kids. the whole day actually.
I only get a precious 3 hours from the time i get home to the time they sleep

So when they sleep, she is already tired out and have no energy.
I go back to doing my work.

But For my work i am already seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. So thing should improve on my end. will look for a solutions her as well.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Give her compliments, lady love it... such as " sexy, nice, this dress fit you, you look great today, you make me think of doing with you dear.... etc" make her feel good, comfortable and may turn her on.

Perhaps I know her feeling well, lady turn to low sex drive. Busy with kids and tired are reasons, BUT mainly caused lack of confident after giving birth.. we need sometimes and expect to receive compliment, confirm and assurance to re-gain the confidence to our figure, as well as to turn on sex drive.

Well i have tried saying that she looked nice and sexy twice when she wore a sexy singlet and jeans at home. Ans she honestly looked great in that. All She said was, All guys only One track mind, Sex!!! in an annoying look and manner.

So tell me what else to tell her?

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

try to seduce her, like clean shaven yourself if you never did that... sure will attract her attention.

try to naked / with only a towel around your waist after shower.. hug her from her back and kiss her, might turn her on.. * personally i like the feeling :D, feel loving, caring and sexy..

During pregnancy, small baby/kid around really make lady's sex drive low, pls bear a bit it is due to "act of hormones". When kid growth elder, lady turn to more horny and would try out whatever pattern you name. Trust me, by time can't promise horny for you or others?

Will like to try your suggestions

Thanks

Regards
Anel King

[Rickey]

Well i have tried saying that she looked nice and sexy twice when she wore a sexy singlet and jeans at home. Ans she honestly looked great in that. All She said was, All guys only One track mind, Sex!!! in an annoying look and manner.So tell me what else to tell her?

Regards
Anel King

Tats a familiar experience with a lot of bros wif their OCs......sigh, why r they so like dat, putting on such a holy stance.....arent they oso sexual beings like the guys ?? If they really dislike sex so much why marry in the 1st place, to marry is to hav sex, and then to hav kids rite ?? :confused: causing misery to all concerned. The world started with all of us being made 'male' or 'female' 1st, isnt tat so ??...

[PepperO]

Well i have tried saying that she looked nice and sexy twice when she wore a sexy singlet and jeans at home. Ans she honestly looked great in that. All She said was, All guys only One track mind, Sex!!! in an annoying look and manner.

So tell me what else to tell her?

Your wife seems a little reserved so perhaps your compliments should not be so direct? Or does TS only compliment your wife when she dresses sexily? :p

Frankly, I would be thrilled if my HB gave me such compliments, but he's a man of few words so I don't take issue with him. I guess it's matter of being patient with our other half and understanding what makes them tick. :)

[sticky5]

Sis PO....guess your HB be very proud of you for such good understanding and caring....kudos

[samyboys]

maybe the solution is to buy Nintendo WII for our partner and hope for 'accident 'to happen

Amanda Flowers Claims She Became a Sex Addict After Wii Fit Fall
April 14, 2010 at 04:54 pm

Amanda Flowers From England Says a Fall From Her Wii Fit Turned Her in to a Sex Addict

In a rather strange turn of events, a woman from Manchester says that after falling from her Wii Fit, she is now a sex addict.

She said that she was using the Wii Fit and she fell from the board and suffered what doctors are calling a 'damaged nerve'. It is not known exactly what she hit when she fell from the board, or how exactly she fell because the board is not far off the ground, but she apparently now requires up to 10 sex sessions a day in order to control her nymphomania.

[Rickey]

Sis PO....guess your HB be very proud of you for such good understanding and caring....kudos

Yes !! indeed. Very hard to find such good wifey nowadays...1 in a million :)

[backdoortowar]

but I soon "saw the light".

jialat. i have also seen the sexual light. unfortunately not the light of life.. but the light of when frustrated better eat out.

[Anel King]

Hi Brother & Sisters

Sorry for the long absence as was tied down with work terribly.

An update about the Wife sex situation. Still hung dry.

But i am seeing a glimmer of hope. Manage to convince her to go to Koh Samui for the weekend around the 25 of Aug, after my reservist next week. Booked everything, booked a private pool and jaquzi villa. She sounded quite happy about it.

But my biggest bonus was, she agreed to go with me without the kids.

Long story short, my inlaws were also telling her about letting go of the kids and spend time with me. (Family help is good)

So will update everyone on the situatuion after the trip. I just need to loon & tahan another 2 and half weeks.

Wish me luck

Regards
Anel King

[Gaiki]

Good luck bro!

[k3lvin123]

brother anel king, i'm married for 4 yr plus coming 5 this year. Things were good i mean sex life la not to guidge you or teach u bad thinking. SEX to woman is something they love when they're single,once pregnant they start to lose interest after birth.so the more they birth the more they lose interest due to the pregnancy however good news is 30+ to 40, their kick come back again.we can make love minimum 1 time per day. After my 1st child max waiting time 1 week 1 time, 2nd child max waiting time 3 weeks, 3rd child broke my record of 2 months due to baby, infant sleeping with us together. I pcc for the 1st 2 years but i realised that i cant be eating mee pok dry for until she gets 30+ so i need to eat some chicken rice, $$$$$ or char mee. Hope u get what i mean, small little things makes the family together but remember after eating please use a tissue & wipe off the oil stains.

[siansianla]

Sigh..... really every family has its cupboard( 家家有本难念的经). My not interested in sex so much but she is very willing to service me anyway i like bj, cim etc... But I really feel bad. The feeling is really not the same as when both really going for it or am I asking too much?
Spend lots of time talking to her. We try going out and having good time together. Even spend a weekend in nice hotel but still no change. Sigh... I give up. No ending. We do love each other alot. My advice to Anel is do try talking to her on whats happening n share your feeling about your need. And I hope you have better luck then me. Good luck. :) :(

[benxmanda]

why dont you try to talking your wifey into letting you to take some sexy photos of hers

[PepperO]

brother anel king, i'm married for 4 yr plus coming 5 this year. Things were good i mean sex life la not to guidge you or teach u bad thinking. SEX to woman is something they love when they're single,once pregnant they start to lose interest after birth.so the more they birth the more they lose interest due to the pregnancy however good news is 30+ to 40, their kick come back again.we can make love minimum 1 time per day. After my 1st child max waiting time 1 week 1 time, 2nd child max waiting time 3 weeks, 3rd child broke my record of 2 months due to baby, infant sleeping with us together. I pcc for the 1st 2 years but i realised that i cant be eating mee pok dry for until she gets 30+ so i need to eat some chicken rice, $$$$$ or char mee. Hope u get what i mean, small little things makes the family together but remember after eating please use a tissue & wipe off the oil stains.

Bro k3lvin123 may be somewhat right, though I have no way of confirming it, as I had my first kid at the age of 29. For me, I feel that my sex drive actually increased after childbirth. At the end of the day, I think it really boils down to the individual, as I know women who used to be darn active in their 20s but totally dread it after having had kids. So I hope bros do not get disheartened by some of our generalisation here, there's always a way out - you only have to try and not give up. :)

[sexualfantasi]

Hi Brother & Sisters

Sorry for the long absence as was tied down with work terribly.

An update about the Wife sex situation. Still hung dry.

But i am seeing a glimmer of hope. Manage to convince her to go to Koh Samui for the weekend around the 25 of Aug, after my reservist next week. Booked everything, booked a private pool and jaquzi villa. She sounded quite happy about it.

But my biggest bonus was, she agreed to go with me without the kids.

Long story short, my inlaws were also telling her about letting go of the kids and spend time with me. (Family help is good)

So will update everyone on the situatuion after the trip. I just need to loon & tahan another 2 and half weeks.

Wish me luck

Regards
Anel King

thats good for your wife and you too ... let her feel the romance again !!!

[k3lvin123]

Hi anel king & SMF brothers, just to share with u guys. I've a friend in FB from USA. She keeps asking me to buy a kind of juice something like those apple orange or whatever, she's in her mid to late 40s. After drinking that juice over a period of time, according to her.... she gets more aroused. I've ordered it from her & will try it out. Attached is the site, it u interested pm me i'll ask from my FB friend.

http://www.monavie.com/Web/US/en/index.dhtml?r=1

* Reminder, i believe it belongs to MLM but no means to have a try.

[the_qwerty]

Bro Anel, i think you probably got to talk to your missus on why she feels disinterested in sex? Sex too boring for her? (always the same move?). Try watching a porn movie together and do fun stuff like eating melted chocolate off each other, you know something kinky to spice things up.

Discuss with her about her wants aand fantasies and tell her about yours too. Since you are going on a trip, it's a good time to explore and rediscover each other. Like what bro Benxmanda mention, try taking some nudes together that you 2 may enjoy and remincse after the trip.

Hope it goes well for you and kudos for having much self restraint despite the tempations.

[(o)(o) Tuner]

Me and my wife have sex at least twice a week. She does everything for me. Almost everything you can see in a porn movie, like suck and gagging on a cock, deepthroating, cof, cim, swallow & fucking in many hardcore positions. Overtime, she has learned how to fuck like one of those sluts in a porn movie.

She loves cock sucking and swallowing my cum in every love making session. At times when we can't have sex due to her period, she would just pull down my pants and suck my cock just to get a dossage of my cum. Sometimes she would do this in the middle of the night when I was deep asleep. I really felt piss off at times, but wat to do? I have to give in to satisfy her cravings. Sometimes I wonder did I over educate her on sex? Till she became so wild and daring (to swallow my cum).

We have done so many to enhance our sexual life. From using sex toys to role playings like nurse, maid, policewoman...etc. It has become so routine for us, so much so that we are beginning to feel bored of our sexual life. So at times after the children gone to bed, we would often discuss how and wat can we do more to enhance our sex life. We also talk about 3somes, but we knew that's highly impossible. Afterall, we are still chinese oriented, unlike the westerners. So we are going to try bdsm / bondage, and that's gonna bring us to another level. :D

Now look, interactions are very important. Try open talks with your partner and share wat's your like and dislike. I think it's important path to maintain a good husband and wife relationship.

[Anel King]

Hi Brothers & Sisters of SBF

Sorry for the long disappearance. 1st went for reservist.

Then went to KOH SAMUI with My WIFE only.

Update on situation.

Mission Sexcesfull

The alone time I spent with my wife was worth the money spent. (Private pool villa was a little ex, but worth it.)

We managed to rekindle our love. But what made me happy was we had sex almost everytime we were in the villa.

Best part, she initiated most of the time. (What more can a horny husband ask for?)

The minute we enter the villa, we would strip naked and walk around in doors and out doors.(Really private and safe) Sex On the bed, In the open air Shower & in the pool. Skinny dipping in the pool also and shower together.

And we also managed to resolve most of our problems and come to a compromise on many issues including sex.

Main reason did not want sex was becoz she was drained out from caring for the kids. (Now resolved.)

So i told her, all i need is minimum foreplay and release 2-3 times a week & Full course once a week.

That is what i have been getting since we came back. becoming a very happy man now. Most of the time we just cuddle naked and i will suck and finger her while she suck and HJ me. I happy already.

Lesson learnt is,

1.Try to force and alone time between you and your spouse. Preferably at a private resort with private pool and open air shower. the romance will automatically come and you will start to fall in love all over again. The work things out with your spouse. (I can tell you, this worked for me. But one mans cure, is another mans demise)

2.Till the above happens, try not to eat outside. Give yourself a time frame of at least a year before eating out. because once you start to eat outside, you will have no motivation to eat inside. (No disrespect to brothers and sisters who are already eating outside)

I was on the verge of eating out, but feel happy thing worked out. I pray this is will be for ever. You never know if things change again.

So brothers and sisters, keep trying to get your spouse to have sex with you.

Regards
Anel King

[mvmhjki6]

Hey bro anel king, care to share which villa is that. Scared to book those villa without any recommendation le. Yours sound good.

[tomvoyeur]

So brothers and sisters, keep trying to get your spouse to have sex with you

Try innovative ideas and think out of the box, bros n sis. ;)

[taegukgi]

Bro

Hopefully I don't end up like you, but I sympathize with you as I know what you are going through.

But seriously 3 years is too long liow. I think would ended up in GL or HC already if i was you.

But hang in there bro if you can.

Regards
Anel King

Good news is I know people that endure more than 3 years, bad news is; I know more and more people having this problem :eek:

[psp100]

this is fact of life. Most women after married will be like that

[darylcch]

Hey bro anel king, care to share which villa is that. Scared to book those villa without any recommendation le. Yours sound good.

Really envy all here...my wife list her sex drive more than a yr ago.
how i talk to her, try my best to please her, buy toys, nothing helps..
so till now..i am still DIY....

[mr chen]

Sorry for asking, after giving birth, most ladies will balloon in weight... Do bros here still find their wives appealing. If not, what step or advice do bros give their other half?

[Anel King]

Try innovative ideas and think out of the box, bros n sis. ;)


Yes bro
I agree.

I bought the sex dice along. was worth it. damn shiok.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Really envy all here...my wife list her sex drive more than a yr ago.
how i talk to her, try my best to please her, buy toys, nothing helps..
so till now..i am still DIY....

Hi Bro

Maybe try going away for the weekend alone like i did. You wont know the outcum till you try some thing.

Wish you the best.

Regards
Anel King

[Anel King]

Sorry for asking, after giving birth, most ladies will balloon in weight... Do bros here still find their wives appealing. If not, what step or advice do bros give their other half?

Bro

Depends from woman to woman. some can loose weight immediately and go back to original.
Some take a bit extra time loose.
While some cannot loose abit or alot.

Advice, if you and her go for walks daily, will definitely help. also help in communication.

Regards
Anel King

[mr chen]

@Anel King, thanks for suggestion.

[darylcch]

had tried before...she keep saying i everytime thinking of sex...
but ...i am guy wat...ai...

[samyboys]

most woman is cold towards sex:o

[darylcch]

should we just take it?

[Sex4Love]

Guess your wife is probably stressed up with her mother duties and housework. Probably you can help to lighten her work load a bit by helping up in certain chores. Give her a massage to relax after a day's of her housework. Sensual touching can turn her on.

Make her feel desirable by praising her if she does something good. Also show appreciation for what she has done as a wife and mother. Surprise her with some small gifts.

Communication is also important too. You need to let her know you are a normal man with needs.

Hope what I said here (http://sextisfaction.wordpress.com) could help you in some ways.

[Anel King]

Hi Brothers and Sisters of SBF

I'm back again. Have been silent for a while but things have not been well with me, so am here again to seek help, guidance and advice from everyone.

Last year after our sex filled Koh Samui trip, we had regular sex almost every week. after 4 months, I started to travel for work and was away for a really long time in Jan & Feb. when I came back, we only had 2 session from March till now.

And in both sessions, Missionary only. if you read my earlier postings here, she only prefers this, even not allowing me to suck & finger her pussy.

Ok nevermind.

When I enter her in Missionary, within 2-3 min, she will ask if I am cumming already. Sian but i continue, after that every 30 sec she will ask. So i get fed up, lie down next to her, PCC and hug & suck her nips till i cum after 10 min.

Which means i can last at least 5 to 15 min per session. But my wife wants to only do 1 position in 2-5 min and finish it. (from Koh Samui to dec was the same)

I went for JG once at my Favorite regular place in CV last month. My Massuers started JG and with 3 min i shot out. She asked me how long ago i had sex, looks like long time already. I felt embarrassed. But she was nice to me, cleaned me up and continued.

Problem 1:
I think my wife just having sex with me just to release my load, fearing that i might end up eating out. So just go through the motion of Having sex.I, on the other hand, want to make love to her and want to help her enjoy the love making session.

Problem 2:
Honestly if she allow me to finger and suck & tongue her pussy till she cum 2 or 3 time, I am happy already. (I am more a foreplay person) Then we can move on to intercourse with doggy, cowgirl and other easy but good positions to enjoy.

Problem 1 & 2 are linked. If the 1st can be solved the 2nd one also will be eliminated.

Appreciate any constructive comment and advice from the brothers and especially sisters (need female advice to understand wife)

[derekc]

Hi Bro
Seem like your wife is not into a great sexual relationship with you. I presume she doesn't goes into orgasm (sexual satisfaction). She is suffering from female sexual dysfunction (FSD). In USA there are 50 million women suffering from this (3 times men's ED). Is there help? Yes, there is a product helping these women now in USA. I will pm you to go further from here.
Have faith if you want to help your wife to improve both of your precious relationship.

[Canoneos]

Have you tried watching porn with your wife? I introduced porn to my wife and it has really improved our sex life. She gets damn horny and wet watching.

Your wife needs to understand that it takes two to tango.

[chowchowkeith]

Hi Bro & Sis of SBF

I've been married for 4 1/2 years now. Before marriage I was active in Geylang and HC's almost every month 1 or 2 times. ONS also once in 1 month.

When I was dating my wife stop everything in Geylang & HC's. Only maximum was sucked her nipples, which surprised me as she was conservativebut she was the one who initiated it.

After marriage, we had sex almost every other day till our 1st child. During the 9 months, she didn’t allow me to even finger her below. 4 months after our 1st child we had sex. I was like a caged animal let loose. But we only had sex 1 a month.

Last year was out 3rd anniversary we had decent sex. The next 3 months we only had once a month till April she confirmed she was pregnant again. Again I got hung dry and DIY from April last year till 2 weeks ago.

Looks like I still won’t have sex whenever I want to cause she like not so interested to even start anything. But once we start, she wants to finish fast. And only missionary, from 1st day to today.

No matter what I try to tell her or what I do, she only what to have when she is ok and only in missionary, nothing else.

I don't want to head back to my old play grounds as that will tear the family apart. I am only a regular for JG in the Tuina shop in CV.

Was wondering if any experience bros & sis can advice.

Regards
Anel King

Bro, if you dont want to go GL,maybe we can go JB spa together. just came back yesterday.. shiok!!

[Christine02]

Bro, is your wife working in daytime? As for me, I'm a mother of 2 kids, some times my hubby & I will disappoint each other, we are quite highly sex drive. Cos' daytime need to work plus night time need to take care of kids and my hubby is working shift work, which totally drained me out. Before got kids, we can do it every alternate day. But now different, normally once a week or once in 2 weeks.

My hubby loves to watch Japanese AV, I even subscribed the Megaporn for him to watch. We also try to accomated each other's needs, tiredness, and understand each other. Just like today (a few hrs ago), after dinner, I ask my mum to help us take care of the kids a while, while we going out for some relax. But in the end, I had a quick bj for my hubby at mscp.

Bro, try to communicate with her more, try to ask her, whether is she tired, her mood. Try to ask your parents or in-law to take care of your kids during weekend and let her have some rest.

Communciation is the best for couples. Very sorry for talkative.

[Anel King]

Have you tried watching porn with your wife? I introduced porn to my wife and it has really improved our sex life. She gets damn horny and wet watching.

Your wife needs to understand that it takes two to tango.

Hi Bro

Well I tried earlier in marraige, but she used to find them sick and said that we should do it our way. ( After that she wanted me to delete my porn collection. Luckly i didn't

So after that, i just stopped.

[Anel King]

Bro, if you dont want to go GL,maybe we can go JB spa together. just came back yesterday.. shiok!!

Hi Bro

I don't want to eat outside yet. Still wanna eat at home and have a good life with wife and kids.

But if the situation becomes that, she doesn't mind me to eat out to satisfy my sexual urge while i maintain my love for her and the family, i will follow you to JB. (Never eat there before. I stop GL & HC when I started dating wife 6 years ago)

But until then, I will still try to make love to my wife.

[Canoneos]

Hi Bro

Well I tried earlier in marraige, but she used to find them sick and said that we should do it our way. ( After that she wanted me to delete my porn collection. Luckly i didn't

So after that, i just stopped.

Is your wife religious? Sounds like she was brought up to treat sex as dirty and wrong. If so, then it will be a difficult task to turn her around. I think there are two ways. One is to convince her that life should be lived to the fullest. That means throwing out inhibitions and have some fun. The other option is to tell her that you are sexually frustrated and need some release. If she hates sex, then you should be allowed to eat out. To be honest, it is ridiculous for a wife to refuse something as mild as doggy style.

[cheongsterjon]

I know of a girl who has been brought up to be very religious....to her sex is something just for procreation and she would do it missionary style only, other positions such as cowgirl or doggie are unnatural and dirty like porn, no need to say there is no bbbj or painting by the guy.....

Is your wife religious? Sounds like she was brought up to treat sex as dirty and wrong. If so, then it will be a difficult task to turn her around. I think there are two ways. One is to convince her that life should be lived to the fullest. That means throwing out inhibitions and have some fun. The other option is to tell her that you are sexually frustrated and need some release. If she hates sex, then you should be allowed to eat out. To be honest, it is ridiculous for a wife to refuse something as mild as doggy style.

[Anel King]

Bro, is your wife working in daytime? As for me, I'm a mother of 2 kids, some times my hubby & I will disappoint each other, we are quite highly sex drive. Cos' daytime need to work plus night time need to take care of kids and my hubby is working shift work, which totally drained me out. Before got kids, we can do it every alternate day. But now different, normally once a week or once in 2 weeks.

My hubby loves to watch Japanese AV, I even subscribed the Megaporn for him to watch. We also try to accomated each other's needs, tiredness, and understand each other. Just like today (a few hrs ago), after dinner, I ask my mum to help us take care of the kids a while, while we going out for some relax. But in the end, I had a quick bj for my hubby at mscp.

Bro, try to communicate with her more, try to ask her, whether is she tired, her mood. Try to ask your parents or in-law to take care of your kids during weekend and let her have some rest.

Communciation is the best for couples. Very sorry for talkative.

Thank you Sis for your input.

You and your hubby are lucky to have each other.

She is at home and taking care of the kids. But she finds it hard to let anyone else take care of them, including both our parents.

So by the time i get back home from the stress filled work, both our batt will be flat. And i travel every month at least a week.

And communication is one thing i am trying to work on as now we just talk about the kids and and our frustrations.

[Anel King]

Is your wife religious? Sounds like she was brought up to treat sex as dirty and wrong. If so, then it will be a difficult task to turn her around. I think there are two ways. One is to convince her that life should be lived to the fullest. That means throwing out inhibitions and have some fun. The other option is to tell her that you are sexually frustrated and need some release. If she hates sex, then you should be allowed to eat out. To be honest, it is ridiculous for a wife to refuse something as mild as doggy style.

HI bro

She isn't the religious type. she has studied in OZland and have been exposed but not participated in sexual activities. But she feels that missionary is the right way to do it we should not influence ourselves by watching porn.

I think she knows i am getting sexually frustrated. I've joked with her a few times that i might just eat out one day. And she says you can do what you wanna do, just don't tell me. (I think its a trick answer)

But i know if i do eat out, she might just leave me.

[rokhard]

Hi Bro

I don't want to eat outside yet. Still wanna eat at home and have a good life with wife and kids.

But if the situation becomes that, she doesn't mind me to eat out to satisfy my sexual urge while i maintain my love for her and the family, i will follow you to JB. (Never eat there before. I stop GL & HC when I started dating wife 6 years ago)

But until then, I will still try to make love to my wife.

Hey bro Anel, I am sorry to hear about your situation. It is easy to feel frustrated. Sister Christine offered very good advice that you should consider paying very close attention to and practicing this advice: communication and making time for each other. In doing so, you have to try to avoid communicating 'your way' and 'making time according to your terms and needs'. In marriage, this is about the two of you. Do you know what this means?

You mentioned that you are considering eating out. I am wondering what is your understanding of sex. Do you see sex as only about your pleasure? If not, then do you try to really understand how you can help your wife receive the same pleasure?

Another question for the meaning of sex: do you see sex as just pleasure or do you see sex as a means to grow your family? In either case, are you on the same page as your wife on this topic? You do realize that if you are not on the same page as your wife, have you tried communicating with your wife about sex, family, future?

Remember that communication is not about you talking but also listening to what your wife has to say, about what she feels, hopes or believes in. When one stops communicating, the other tends to drift off and that is where problems begin. When a husband just wants sex, without communication, without being sensitive to her needs, the wife tends to become 'cold' or disinterested. You can appreciate the wife's complaint that she is being treated like a sex object. Is it possible that that is why your wife treats sex like a chore?

I also note that both of you had good sex when on a holiday. Could it be that chores are getting in the way of being/feeling sexy? Can you visualize what's going on in her mind: wake up on time, feed the kids on time, take them to school on time, prepare lunch on time, do the marketing, fetch them from school on time, do the errands, prepare the dinner on time, laundry, emergencies and then the husband comes home and he wants sex: how does a wife feel sexy like this?

Just a few thoughts. I hope this helps you on your way to bonding with your family.

[abchow]

HI Anel,

When 2 persons from different world comes together as hubby and wife . Its take alot of effort and time to connect.

But when both party settle down and stay together under same roof, the day to day activity becomes mundane.
Alot of time , both side will take for granted each other.
communication is lesser. Then become monotonous and then totally nothing much to talk except kids, school, expense etc..

The romance and spark is gone and then becomes just two body staying together. There is no excitement or anticipation like a courting couple.

This has happen to many a couples lving a modern lifestyle in Singapore or a rat race society.

I feel you should try to romance your wife like your courting days.
Do not have SEX as the motive. But just enjoy being together . Hold hands , Kiss .. walk along the beach .. enjoy some private time together.
Dinner together - not necessary a posh restaurant. Just have time for each other. The loving feeling will come back and then both of you will enjoy it.

So create time and chance for this to happen naturally.
U may have plan this kind of activity since your wife maybe too tired to do any planning.

Let your in laws take care of your kids.

anyway , too long story..

Wish you all the best

Good luck!!

[Prince81]

Yes bro.. I totally agree with all brothers and sisters advice.. Whatever you do try not to have an affair outside. Talk to your wife. If not pay and get it done with. Dun create more problem by having an affair outside. It will be even worst if u fall for the third party and eventually have to force yourself to leave the third party for the sake of ur family. I know how painful it is to destroy a relationship with someone whom u love so dearly jus because u have to maintain ur family. That is exactly wat I am goin through now....