fit to marry

[leungccsg]

Hi guys

seeking your opinion.

i have a GF for past 2 years and she has been staying with me since.
she is very keen to get married but i am still very comfortable with what i am .

one serious thing that is bothering me is the financial aspects.
well , my GF is kinda of very money minded to the extend she does not wants to spend anything on our common stuff than herself.

list of examples.
1 ) wedding cost.
she expect me to give up all my bonus for wedding cost but she get to keep hers.
2 ) travel holiday
she expect me to pay for everything when she is the one who want to travel.
3 ) household expenses
she stayed with me for past 1yr plus , and everything is paid by me.
even when the fridge is empty , she would not stock up.
even she goes to NTUC , she would buy only her stuff.
4 ) daily meals
i dine with her , pick her up from work. but she just dun automatic to pay for some of the meals . expect me to pick up tab.

even when i am jobless for past 5 months , she still behave as if nothing.
never automatic.

during CNY , she expect me to buy new yea goodies for her parents but never even bother to buy anything for my side. worst , she buy stuff for her family and never buy anything for the home she stayed.

i do love her but this is the time that been holding me back.
spoken to her before and she think i am insulting her.
her opinion is that guy should pay for everything.

do you think i should marry such girl ?

advise please

[lovetorn]

the fact that you are hesitating whether to marry her or not means that you are not willing to accept her 'money-minded, materialistic' ways. if she is like this even before you 2 are married, imagine how will she be like once married. she will probably live with the view that men (husbands) should be the one supporting the household. they should be the one giving their wife monthly household allowances and pay for their every expenses. maybe you shouldn't hold it back, even if you love her. if she really loves you too, she will do something about it. communication is the key, and if after talking it through with her, she still feels that she is right, then i see no point. think of the future. can you bear with her money-minded ways?

[goodpartner]

Wah Lun Eh!

These kind of GF also have ah! :eek:

Stinginess or Calculative person I've seen a lot, but some of the things you highlighted are really too much to bear imho. Frankly, if you can pen down such details (of unfairness) out loud means you KNOW deep inside you that they are simply... wrong.

People don't change....easily.
And from what you say about talking to her but only to get rebutted, it laggi means she won't ever change after you 2 married, supposedly for the rest of your life. Again, if you're the type that don't mind, you won't be here asking if this is "fit to marry".

I know if it's me I'll go crazy one day and flare up when pressure mounted.
She is not JUST being stingy or calculative to me, it's something more serious man. :rolleyes:

[Assplorer]

bro , IMHO this type of woman will U turn and leave you in 5 mins when u are in dire straits . do consider carefully whether she is the right one for u . PEACE :cool:

[naemlo]

advise please

What do u still need to think??? Dump her. Life will be happier. :rolleyes:

[The Milk Man]

Only at BF/GF stage and she is oredi applying the Womens Charter :mad:

Bro, get out while you still can before it's too late!

F*CK THE WOMENS CHARTER !!!

[sammyboyfor]

Hi guys

seeking your opinion.

i have a GF for past 2 years and she has been staying with me since.
she is very keen to get married but i am still very comfortable with what i am .



DUMP HER as quickly as possible!!!! :eek: No cheebye is worth this sort of crap.:rolleyes:

When it comes to marriage, you should find yourself a girl who is loving and caring and has YOUR interests at heart. Look for one who enjoys helping others, does social work, is kind and considerate towards her parents and her relatives and generally shuns luxury goods and decadent living.

[waiwaiz]

don see much future in this kind of relationship. can foresee more quarreling over money issue after married.think carefully bro. gd luck :)

[bfreemen]

bro you pay her for bonking ?

[goodpartner]

can foresee more quarreling over money issue after married.

And if the marriage don't work out, given this type of gal... 101% sure that the extreme wrath of the women's charter will smile upon you.
... she'll demand that you ALSO pay for the lawyer fee even if she's the plaintiff ;)

[hbk88]

bro . . . without saying anything you should know what we will be saying. the fact that you yourself are doubting, you should known the answer yourself.

[see see only]

TS,

Women with this kind of mindset almost unlikely to change as they are brain washed when young .... and is worse than marrying a FL or WL :(

They will dump you in time of trouble. My ex-wife is the same kind, she dumped me after my business failed and almost brankrupt.

But now my life picked up .... even divorced for 7 years liao still huanting me for more maintenance and even use the "WOMENS CHARTER" to throw me to court for more money. :mad:

[joew2005]

better think careully ..... no $ no honey !!

[etct88]

"what is yours is her's, what is her's is her's":eek:

If you can accept this, then continue with the next phase of life and good luck to you. :rolleyes:

Good that you have come to your senses.

Do considerations carefully.

Do your mathematics for long term.

What is your happiness worth?

Whatever, wish you all the best.:)

[tanmikel]

do you think i should marry such girl ?

advise please

if she is so bad , why are you still with her ?:confused:

[Xgenre]

Set up a joint account for common expenses. You put in a certain amount and she puts in the same amount. For joint expenses, use this pool of money.

[leungccsg]

hi bro

many thanks for your replies.

to answer to some query , my GF does respect elders ( her own family), does a bit of social work, kind and caring when we did not quarrel thought she never say sorry even when she is in the wrong.

i did suggest to open a joint acct , but it did not materialize.
she always say she want to keep all her money to buy herself a house in singapore ( she is a malaysian ).
so saving her own penny is her rights.

i even told her that we can buy ourselves a house under joint name and it also never happen.

some bros hit the bull eye , on many occasion , it hit my boiling point that i called for breakup but in the end my heart turned soft.

seriously , i do think she will make a good wife who can upkeep the house but it is the matter of she being so stingy and un-automatic about money issues.

leopard does not change it spot ? or is all malaysian girls behave in the same way ? taught in the way that men must always pick up the tab and they keep their own penny.

[thrustee]

leopard does not change it spot ? or is all malaysian girls behave in the same way ? taught in the way that men must always pick up the tab and they keep their own penny.

Do not generalize bro ! its the character of the gals not the nationality of the gals . so far my experience with malaysian girls are good . bedy goody ! :D

[see see only]

some bros hit the bull eye , on many occasion , it hit my boiling point that i called for breakup but in the end my heart turned soft.

Bro, it is about time you start to dominate the situation. :rolleyes:

Ask yourself did you pay everything during courtship and insist to pay everything tat time ???? :rolleyes:

If the answer is yes, then i reckon you turn the table around and tell her straight what you feel deep inside.

Tell her, you can pay now but not forever ... "marriage / relationship is living together not living for her" :cool:

So now insist on some time you pay, sometime she pay and other normal couple measure .......... or else you can & got so many choices in singapore especially with so many PRC decent students hoping to marry a sillyporean :p

[James81]

bro my gf is 100% like your GF i dated her for 5yrs sinces i was a student... i pay for all the expenses got to take up 2 jobs jus to support her,

however things started to change over time, she once told me that its the responsibility of a man to uphold burden.. so i need to be stronger.. i worked very hard and become quite sucessful over the years. guess what ? her spending power is still the same ~ as the past no increment~i was happy cause the ammount of money she spend now is only 0.5% of my income.

the point is true love is hard to come by if u can't change her let time do so, in the meanwhile you should work harder if things dun work well by then , at least u done your best

[Xgenre]

she always say she want to keep all her money to buy herself a house in singapore ( she is a malaysian ).
so saving her own penny is her rights.

You didn't say she's a Malaysian girl just now. Now it all makes sense. Malaysian girls are like that, tend to be thrifty. I've met a few and sometimes do wonder if our differences are due to different growing up experiences.

Here's what I think. A lot of Singaporeans view the Causeway and 2nd Link as just 2 bridges into Malaysia. A bridge that brings you from home to holiday. The moment you reach Johor, you feel like you are on holiday. Your money is bigger due to the exchange rate etc. However, the Malaysians view the 2 bridges differently. To them, it's a bridge that brings that from home to work (make money, money, money). They are primarily concerned about making as much SGD dollars as they can and then converting them to Ringgit. The money they send home can make quite a lot of difference in Malaysia. Getting married, having Singapore PR is just a bonus. Got or not, doesn't really matter. Most importantly, must make money and save them for a better future back in Malaysia. A lot of successful Malaysians (doctors, lawyers) think like that. Maybe that's why she's more thrifty and conscious about defining what's your money and what's her money.

Does she convert whatever she want to buy into ringgit (in her mind) before she buys? Does she see something that costs SGD$50 and think 'Wah, that's $120 ringgit, so expensive.'?

Why don't you ask her the most important questions?
1. Do you see your future with me?
2. What and how should we go about building our future if you say yes?
3. What will you say if I tell you I can't do build our future alone based on my income alone?

[me05]

If you are affected now during the relationship, think how bad it will be 5 or 10 years down the marriage path, when you have less patience for this kind of bullshit.

its ur call if you want to put it up with it. if you think it is bearable then go ahead. Or have a good discussion with her, and tell her if this continue you will not marry her.

PS: you may loss everything later if you marry and seperate later.

[arsenal_84]

i would say KIV the situation first...sort out these nagging issues before further commitment.

[Stamp]

if she is so bad , why are you still with her ?:confused:

Yes I am very confused too on why you are still with her. So far you have listed her cons. What other positive aspects other than those couple you have stated makes you want to be with her ?

It's not the nationality, it's the character. Her social work seems very much to contrast with her nature where money is concerned. Eyes wide open Bro.

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

.....

i have a GF for past 2 years and she has been staying with me since.
she is very keen to get married but i am still very comfortable with what i am .

one serious thing that is bothering me is the financial aspects.well , my GF is kinda of very money minded to the extend she does not wants to spend anything on our common stuff than herself.
.....

even when i am jobless for past 5 months , she still behave as if nothing.
never automatic.

during CNY , she expect me to buy new yea goodies for her parents but never even bother to buy anything for my side. worst , she buy stuff for her family and never buy anything for the home she stayed.

i do love her but this is the time that been holding me back.
spoken to her before and she think i am insulting her.
her opinion is that guy should pay for everything.

do you think i should marry such girl ?





.......my GF does respect elders ( her own family), does a bit of social work, kind and caring when we did not quarrel thought she never say sorry even when she is in the wrong.

i did suggest to open a joint acct , but it did not materialize.

she always say she want to keep all her money to buy herself a house in singapore ( she is a malaysian ).
so saving her own penny is her rights.

i even told her that we can buy ourselves a house under joint name and it also never happen.

.....on many occasion, it hit my boiling point that i called for breakup but in the end my heart turned soft.

seriously , i do think she will make a good wife who can upkeep the house - Upkeep the house???? Huh?????? Whose House?????

but it is the matter of she being so stingy and un-automatic about money issues.

leopard does not change it spot ? or is all malaysian girls behave in the same way ? taught in the way that men must always pick up the tab and they keep their own penny.

It's not a matter of financial aspects, it's the mindset!

Do you think marriage will change her? Yes - it will - it will likely maker her even more selfish and your problems become magnified.

Let's be clear. Marriage is great and it doubles your joy if you are already happy and it quadruples your sorrows if you already have cracks in your relationship. Before taking the plunge, you will need to sort out your differences and problems before they become uncontrollable monsters.

You have all the information you need right now to make a decision. Inside your heart, you already knows the answer and what needs to be done!

[teebs_darklord]

It's not a matter of financial aspects, it's the mindset!

Do you think marriage will change her? Yes - it will - it will likely maker her even more selfish and your problems become magnified.

Let's be clear. Marriage is great and it doubles your joy if you are already happy and it quadruples your sorrows if you already have cracks in your relationship. Before taking the plunge, you will need to sort out your differences and problems before they become uncontrollable monsters.

You have all the information you need right now to make a decision. Inside your heart, you already knows the answer and what needs to be done!

Agree with Bro IK on what he has said. If you think that marriage will change your gf, think again. It may change her for the worse instead...:D

[noobcomer]

Hi TS,

Give you some of my own opinions. I think a person to change his/her mindset is impossible. If I am in your shoes, I will probably dump her. Her mindset will never change ever. Forget talks lol. I tried before so many times, she may change for a while but usually they get tired of it and revert back.

Accept her only if you do not mind such a woman. Like what some of the other bros say, this kind of woman will run away from you when you are in trouble. And stick to you only when you have money. Her money is her own, so don't expect her to do anything for you at all.

I have a cousin who married a Malaysian woman. She also cares more of her family than my cousin's. I only seen her once during their wedding banquest in their 7 years of marriage. Now they are divorcing because he cannot stand her anymore.

Better think carefully bro. Marriage should be a lifetime of happiness, not a lifetime of enduring and unhappiness

[kick_ass]

even when i am jobless for past 5 months , she still behave as if nothing.
never automatic.

during CNY , she expect me to buy new yea goodies for her parents but never even bother to buy anything for my side. worst , she buy stuff for her family and never buy anything for the home she stayed.

i do love her but this is the time that been holding me back.
spoken to her before and she think i am insulting her.
her opinion is that guy should pay for everything.

do you think i should marry such girl ?

advise please

if she loves u, she will buy some stuff for ur family as that is what i think is the most basic since she is imposing on them.
nowadays even the smarter Fls will buy things for guys in order to 放长线钓大鱼. ur gf not even doing any of it?

DUMP her!

[alan0338]

TS, how did u managed to tahan with her for 1 year plus really amazes me.... :eek: but if she is the way as u described, seriously, dun see any future for u guys... no offence :)

[heroseven2003]

What a load of crap !..............Get rid of her quickly to avoid a lifetime of misery. No Chao Chee Bye is worth this much :p

[Ryan]

She must be REALLY REALLY good in something to have you continue in this relationship........

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

Knowing fully well, you might still want to marry her. You need to drill into her that she needs to accept your family as they are HER OWN and not to treat them as "Out-Law"! :p It is no time nor room for a soft heart for a lifetime of misery and unhappiness. :D

[sammyboyfor]

seriously , i do think she will make a good wife who can upkeep the house but it is the matter of she being so stingy and un-automatic about money issues.



If you want someone to take care of the home, you don't need a wife. Get yourself a maid. It's much cheaper. If she doesn't perform her housekeeping duties to your satisfaction, you can fire her and get a new one with zero consequences. (try doing that with a wife and see what happens!!!)

If you need sex, you can work out a deal with your maid so you can bang her too.

If your maid is too ugly for sex, pay for it by the hour with one of the many delightful whores that operate in Singapore. In the long run, the cost per fuck is VERY much lower.

[leungccsg]

thanks bro for your advise.

well , there have been many times i feel like giving up.
but one thing which is holding me is somehow emotional.
you may call it stupid , but i feel responsible since she has stayed with me for past 1 yr. and her family thinks we are getting married soon.

my GF is those very family oriented. even at times , she suggested to get her pregnant but i freaked out.

i am really stuck in my decision.
i know this stupid habit of hers will not changed ....be it now after talk or future coz i tried before. and i could not tolerate it as well.
but on the other hand , i think she will make a good wife and mother.

the sensible decision is let go as there are better fishes in the ocean....

becoz of this issue , i hate to provide anymore and hated to even have sex with her . we are not even on talking terms for past 2 weeks n i even requested her to find her own lodging.... but till now , nothing is happening with her.

well , she is earning a decent income as well ...above S$5k.

i guess it is time to move on... but how to resolve this amicably and ask her to move out ?
i tried asking her to move out but everytime she did not react.
i do not want things to turn ugly

[Triple-X]

Typical Singaporen bitchy slut :D

[K9696]

Dear TS..

Looking at your presentation. you are going thru hard time - do you?

You may want to find tune yourself and widen your social circle to know more gers and probably you could find someone better.

Cheers;)

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

thanks bro for your advise.

well , there have been many times i feel like giving up.
but one thing which is holding me is somehow emotional.
you may call it stupid , but i feel responsible since she has stayed with me for past 1 yr. and her family thinks we are getting married soon.

my GF is those very family oriented. even at times , she suggested to get her pregnant but i freaked out.

i am really stuck in my decision.
i know this stupid habit of hers will not changed ....be it now after talk or future coz i tried before. and i could not tolerate it as well.
but on the other hand , i think she will make a good wife and mother.

the sensible decision is let go as there are better fishes in the ocean....

becoz of this issue , i hate to provide anymore and hated to even have sex with her . we are not even on talking terms for past 2 weeks n i even requested her to find her own lodging.... but till now , nothing is happening with her.

well , she is earning a decent income as well ...above S$5k.

i guess it is time to move on... but how to resolve this amicably and ask her to move out ?
i tried asking her to move out but everytime she did not react.
i do not want things to turn ugly

What are you trying to tell us la?
What not on talking terms for 2 weeks? CNY just few days ago :confused:
I really blur blur with your this sudden U-Turn post liao la. :confused:
1 moment cannot stand her , she didn't share the expanses in the household, free stay for past 1 year, and yet you feel responsible? She make a good wife and mother? - Then marry her la and don't feel bad of all things you said in your 1st post.

Funny, I didn't notice you mentioning of "My Family" in all the postings, it's all "Her family"

Do you really understand what you wrote?:rolleyes:

[teebs_darklord]

Bro,

You are an adult since you are already ready to get married. Marriage is a long term commitment though these days it's easier to get a divorce but I doubt you are considering this route at this moment.

At the end of the day, the decision is yours.

If you want to break off with her then why bother about having an amicable break off? Tell her straight that both of you are through and get her to pack her bags and move out asap.

On the other hand if you feel that she will make a good mother and wife then by all means marry her. You always have the option of divorcing her in future if things do not work out.

[deelite825]

bro, it sounds to me that u are still unsure of what you want.

do you want
(1) a wife who can share the financial burden with you
(2) a wife who can take care of family and kids (housewife)
(3) both of above

i dont think (3) exists anymore. and the way you describe your gf, it sounds like she belongs more to (2) but with $5k salary, i don't think she will be quitting her job and taking care of your kids in the future. she will probably continue with her job, pocket her $5k salary and make you pay for a maid for the household chores.

i think communication is the key... u can't be in non-talking terms with her because this will happen more often if you are married to her. a non-talking couple will just lead to a divorce.

just my 2 cts.

[Arion]

Bro Leung, first you ask if you should marry her, then becomes how to break up amicably with her ? This is getting very confusing. Shows that you are very conflicted yourself on whether or not you should continue on while on the other hand, years of attachment have formed a bond that you do not want to break......or something like that.....

You need to make up your mind first if you want marriage or breakup ? :confused:

[smartke]

..........

i have a GF for past 2 years and she has been staying with me since........... .

one serious thing that is bothering me is the financial aspects.
well , my GF is kinda of very money minded to the extend she does not wants to spend anything on our common stuff than herself.

..........

even when i am jobless for past 5 months , she still behave as if nothing.
never automatic.

i wonder if she even love or care for u! u r jobless yet she DID NOTHING??

during CNY , she expect me to buy new yea goodies for her parents but never even bother to buy anything for my side. worst , she buy stuff for her family and never buy anything for the home she stayed.

..........

her opinion is that guy should pay for everything.

if she has a heart for u, dun think she shld even hv such thoughts!

do you think i should marry such girl?

havin said all the above, dun u think it's already clear enuf?
sorry for bein direct but dun think tis q shld even be asked...

..........

to answer to some query , my GF does respect elders ( her own family), does a bit of social work, kind and caring when we did not quarrel thought she never say sorry even when she is in the wrong.

..........

she always say she want to keep all her money to buy herself a house in singapore ( she is a malaysian ).
so saving her own penny is her rights.

regardless she is msian, sporean or prc, both parties shld share the cost when both parties commited to each other. so, u r saying she only respect the elders in her family?

..........

leopard does not change it spot ? or is all malaysian girls behave in the same way ? taught in the way that men must always pick up the tab and they keep their own penny.

it's nothing to do wif nationality cos i seen many msian gers putting more efforts more than guys! so, i believe it's how she was brought up.

..........

becoz of this issue , i hate to provide anymore and hated to even have sex with her . we are not even on talking terms for past 2 weeks n i even requested her to find her own lodging.... but till now , nothing is happening with her.

well , she is earning a decent income as well ...above S$5k.

she is earning so much & yet she dun even bother to pay a single cent?
my sincere advice... "DUMP HER IMMEDIATELY!!!" really no point continue...

i guess it is time to move on... but how to resolve this amicably and ask her to move out ?
i tried asking her to move out but everytime she did not react.
i do not want things to turn ugly

u r in ur current situation bcos u hv been dominent by her all this while!!

probably not the best way but, u can start off by not sending/picking her up at work, stop spending on her & etc...

my humble 2 RMB...

[Glidiator]

DUMP HER as quickly as possible!!!! :eek: No cheebye is worth this sort of crap.:rolleyes:

When it comes to marriage, you should find yourself a girl who is loving and caring and has YOUR interests at heart. Look for one who enjoys helping others, does social work, is kind and considerate towards her parents and her relatives and generally shuns luxury goods and decadent living.
Well said Boss.
Totally agree all what you said!!

[Sam Heng]

Just curious, is the sex great? if it is, then just tahan lor lol

[makemecum]

Hi guys

1 ) wedding cost.
she expect me to give up all my bonus for wedding cost but she get to keep hers.
2 ) travel holiday
she expect me to pay for everything when she is the one who want to travel.
3 ) household expenses
she stayed with me for past 1yr plus , and everything is paid by me.
even when the fridge is empty , she would not stock up.
even she goes to NTUC , she would buy only her stuff.
4 ) daily meals
i dine with her , pick her up from work. but she just dun automatic to pay for some of the meals . expect me to pick up tab.

..during CNY , she expect me to buy new yea goodies for her parents but never even bother to buy anything for my side. worst , she buy stuff for her family and never buy anything for the home she stayed.

..
do you think i should marry such girl ?

advise please

dump her. period
worse than ktv gal.
at list some of them buy some gift for their bf sia.
the girl may not be well off...but can buy small token "li qing , qing yi zhong"..

call her go live in medival period la..guy pay for erything...if u r millionaire ok la...but if u normal working class...she expecting tooo muc...

earning 5k s/mo... u love her wat...stinginess...selfishness...untotfulness....
the only reason i can think she mus be damn chio...if not wats her goodness huh...



guess it is time to move on... but how to resolve this amicably and ask her to move out ?
i tried asking her to move out but everytime she did not react.
i do not want things to turn ugly


1) change the door lock and cut off contact with her
2) pack her barang barang put in room in H81 and text her to collect herself
3) tell her straight in the face
4) sex her until she cannot tahan n run off
y she no react...erythin free ma...real cheapskate...bah...



bro my gf is 100% like your GF i dated her for 5yrs sinces i was a student... i pay for all the expenses got to take up 2 jobs jus to support her,

however things started to change over time, she once told me that its the responsibility of a man to uphold burden.. so i need to be stronger.. i worked very hard and become quite sucessful over the years. guess what ? her spending power is still the same ~ as the past no increment~i was happy cause the ammount of money she spend now is only 0.5% of my income.
....

wahseih. 0.5 %, presumim she spend 1k yo income equal 200,000!
can share share secrets of yo success...beside workin hard...i oso work hard le...but earn meagre income...

[smartke]

1) change the door lock and cut off contact with her
2) pack her barang barang put in room in H81 and text her to collect herself
3) tell her straight in the face
4) sex her until she cannot tahan n run off
y she no react...erythin free ma...real cheapskate...bah...

#1 & #2 not a gd idea cos bro leungccsg already said tat he dun wan things to turn ugly. afterall, they hv been staying 2gether for 2yrs.

#3 already done by but his gf jus did nothing.

#4 may not work cos i suspect his gf is gd in tis area & tis probably one the reason holdin bro leungccsg :D:p sorry bro leungccsg, jus kidding... :)

[paul55ho]

Hi guys

seeking your opinion.

i have a GF for past 2 years and she has been staying with me since.
she is very keen to get married but i am still very comfortable with what i am .

one serious thing that is bothering me is the financial aspects.
well , my GF is kinda of very money minded to the extend she does not wants to spend anything on our common stuff than herself.

list of examples.
1 ) wedding cost.
she expect me to give up all my bonus for wedding cost but she get to keep hers.
2 ) travel holiday
she expect me to pay for everything when she is the one who want to travel.
3 ) household expenses
she stayed with me for past 1yr plus , and everything is paid by me.
even when the fridge is empty , she would not stock up.
even she goes to NTUC , she would buy only her stuff.
4 ) daily meals
i dine with her , pick her up from work. but she just dun automatic to pay for some of the meals . expect me to pick up tab.

even when i am jobless for past 5 months , she still behave as if nothing.
never automatic.

during CNY , she expect me to buy new yea goodies for her parents but never even bother to buy anything for my side. worst , she buy stuff for her family and never buy anything for the home she stayed.

i do love her but this is the time that been holding me back.
spoken to her before and she think i am insulting her.
her opinion is that guy should pay for everything.

do you think i should marry such girl ?

advise please

Dump her...treat all the expenses u paid as what u pay for a whore outside. No such thing as u pay while she spend....who the hell her father is? Then every mth send money back to her parents? Jus screw her a few more time n ask her to wake up, or ship out!

[paul55ho]

Typical Singaporen bitchy slut :D

Malaysian la... ur thai wan how? hahaha

[3Dragon]

Let's be clear. Marriage is great and it doubles your joy if you are already happy and it quadruples your sorrows if you already have cracks in your relationship. Before taking the plunge, you will need to sort out your differences and problems before they become uncontrollable monsters.

Wise words from the great Ichigo_Kurosaki.... lol

Dump her la bro....prempuan ini, tak boleh pakai.... u dun understd what i wote, u copy down ask ur gfrd whats the meaning... :)

[leungccsg]

hi bro

i tried changing lock before or even force her to move out.
but my heart soften when i see her pack her bags n no where to go.
there is once she had pack her bags and spent the night in her company van with no where else to go.

i do not feel like having sex with her anymore.
i do not want her to treat it as if sex is a repayment for the money i spent on her.

i did tell her in the face, but no use. change a while then back to normal again

fyi , my GF is not those syt or chio bus. just normal looking .

i am just tired trying new r/s after so much failure.
i thought i can work out this current one but another roadblock again.

who likes to be a carrot head ? i dun.

[smartke]

Wise words from the great Ichigo_Kurosaki.... lol

Dump her la bro....prempuan ini, tak boleh pakai.... u dun understd what i wote, u copy down ask ur gfrd whats the meaning... :)

lolx... bro, it's 'perempuan'... u missed out the letter 'e'... :D

maybe 'teman perempuan ini langsung tak guna' wld be better! :p

[MengJai]

Here's what I think. A lot of Singaporeans view the Causeway and 2nd Link as just 2 bridges into Malaysia. A bridge that brings you from home to holiday. The moment you reach Johor, you feel like you are on holiday. Your money is bigger due to the exchange rate etc. However, the Malaysians view the 2 bridges differently. To them, it's a bridge that brings that from home to work (make money, money, money). They are primarily concerned about making as much SGD dollars as they can and then converting them to Ringgit. The money they send home can make quite a lot of difference in Malaysia. Getting married, having Singapore PR is just a bonus. Got or not, doesn't really matter. Most importantly, must make money and save them for a better future back in Malaysia. A lot of successful Malaysians (doctors, lawyers) think like that. Maybe that's why she's more thrifty and conscious about defining what's your money and what's her money.

Very true. I had a biz in KL a few years back...when they hear i'm sgprean...they are like thinking we can spend alot of money on them...Once bitten, twice shy.

[3Dragon]

lolx... bro, it's 'perempuan'... u missed out the letter 'e'... :D

maybe 'teman perempuan ini langsung tak guna'! :p

hahaha...betul betul... maaf la, i never learn malay before, just picked it up frm my staff...hehehe... can say "perempuan ini langsung gorblock"

[3Dragon]

hi bro

i tried changing lock before or even force her to move out.
but my heart soften when i see her pack her bags n no where to go.
there is once she had pack her bags and spent the night in her company van with no where else to go.



To have a better future, u nid to be CRUEL! Ask her go n dun look back! Rathe be cruel now than have a broken marriage later.

[smartke]

hahaha...betul betul... maaf la, i never learn malay before, just picked it up frm my staff...hehehe... can say "perempuan ini langsung gorblock"

haha... me too.. know very simple malay only...

wats "gorblock"? :o

[Doriemus]

Do not generalize bro ! its the character of the gals not the nationality of the gals . so far my experience with malaysian girls are good . bedy goody ! :D

Bro, bed skills and money sucking skills are different la...lol

[3Dragon]

haha... me too.. know very simple malay only...

wats "gorblock"? :o

lol...gor-block frm what i know, is similar to Goondo... meaning stupid like a piece of wood.. hehe

[smartke]

lol...gor-block frm what i know, is similar to Goondo... meaning stupid like a piece of wood.. hehe

lolx... icic... the word sounds like indo, or it's a very traditional malay.

anyway, something for u, bro TS...

前方是绝路，希望在转角！

“命里有时终须有，命里无时莫强求”.... 人生中总有很多挫折，但那不是尽头。只是在提醒你：该转弯了！
放手，只是为自己找条更美好的路走。幸福，是要靠自己去争取。但，勉强就不会有幸福~~~

[HCKing]

TS dont worry abt her la. since u said she earning abt $5k/mth even if u dump her nw i think she can survive on her own $.:D

[goodpartner]

i do not feel like having sex with her anymore.
i do not want her to treat it as if sex is a repayment for the money i spent on her.

No Sex!!!? :eek:
Plus....She's not SYT nor chio bu type...

Seriously, what else do you feel for her except for all the guilt feeling when your heart turn soft?

[SYTBigBoobLover]

..........

who likes to be a carrot head ? i dun.

bro TS,

Pls move on...

It's not abt being carrot head or not, it's about her actions & mindset!

Based on what you have mentioned, I got a feeling she is taking you for granted! Also, she is too self-centered! Everything is about herself & you need to do

[makemecum]

If ....If you need sex, you can work out a deal with your maid so you can bang her too.

If your maid is too ugly for sex, pay for it by the hour with one of the many delightful whores that operate in Singapore. In the long run, the cost per fuck is VERY much lower.

hey Boss, tot of yo suggestion b4 le...
but to get a pretty maid esp syt esp china so far Sin garment no allow / have le:p

[shitrules]

Dont marry her, go and find someone new... there are plenty of girls out there who are decent and generous.

You deserve better than that bro.

[Chinapuss]

TS, juz DUMP her...no point of marrying such a gal...she juz wan ur $ and NOT u.. :eek:

[nitefyre]

hi bro

i tried changing lock before or even force her to move out.
but my heart soften when i see her pack her bags n no where to go.
there is once she had pack her bags and spent the night in her company van with no where else to go.


Doesnt' she have friends she can stay with?

To be honest, if the same happened to me, I also wouldn't just leave my ex like that la. Cause you still have history and of course, not devoid of all feelings. You just don't think you have a future, but it's not like you hate her or anything. This is normal ... so don't feel too bad about not being more heavy handed.

However, if you are truly at wits end, i have a suggestion (although it may cost a pretty penny). Why don't you look for a place for her, and pay the first month rent? Maybe suggest this and c her reaction. This way, she has a place to stay, and you won't be tied down by the guilt of kicking her onto the streets.

[Caduceus]

hi bro

i tried changing lock before or even force her to move out.
but my heart soften when i see her pack her bags n no where to go.
there is once she had pack her bags and spent the night in her company van with no where else to go.



Sounds like she knows you better than you know yourself. This topic is becoming more like how to make a clean break now. Well, you said it yourself, you have a soft heart. And after a few years, good or bad times, still will have some feelings.

Why don't you just give her a time frame to move out and in the meantime, demonstrate your determination by not sleeping in the same room, avoid speaking to her and doing things together.

I have a sneaky suspicion that if you are able to do the above, she will have a heart to heart talk to you and promise you that she will try to change. But, cross the bridge when it comes to that. Display you determination first.

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

hi bro

i tried changing lock before or even force her to move out.
but my heart soften when i see her pack her bags n no where to go.
there is once she had pack her bags and spent the night in her company van with no where else to go.

i do not feel like having sex with her anymore.
i do not want her to treat it as if sex is a repayment for the money i spent on her.

i did tell her in the face, but no use. change a while then back to normal again

fyi , my GF is not those syt or chio bus. just normal looking .

i am just tired trying new r/s after so much failure.
i thought i can work out this current one but another roadblock again.

who likes to be a carrot head ? i dun.

How to say in Hokkein: What are you talking now? :confused::eek:

[teebs_darklord]

How to say in Hokkein: What are you talking now? :confused::eek:

A crude version goes something like this:

li gong simi lan jiao??? OR li gong simi jiao wei??? :D

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

A crude version goes something like this:

li gong simi lan jiao??? OR li gong simi jiao wei??? :D

Thanks bro.
Really it's getting very drama with each updates.
Moving out without breaking up do not solve the problem :D

TS: You need to walk away and let her knows that if she wants you then she will need to grow up and behave like a woman that respects the man that she is involved with, not just uses him;)

Then again, your heart is soft, so ........................:rolleyes:

[RealEstateGuy]

Your GF is nothing but a leech and doesnt have the qualities to make a good wife in my opinion. Your best course of actions is to make a clean break even if you have to move.

[teebs_darklord]

TS, seriously if you are as soft hearted as you make yourself out to be (which I doubt), then go ahead and marry her and suffer the consequences yourself because you really have no other person to blame for the mess you are in right now. :D

We will wait for your next thread after you are married to her and when you KPKB about how much suffering you are going through, we will offer our condolences to you. :p

Just recite these few words when you marry her: 生命苦短, 人生充满了悲哀.

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

委屈求全，可是结果是事与愿违，委屈了自己，伤透了亦!
一时心软，做了一个错误的决定。:(
古语：一失足成千古恨，回头已是百年身:(
小弟, 三思而行啊! :o

[teebs_darklord]

委屈求全，可是结果是事与愿违，委屈了自己，伤透了亦!
一时心软，做了一个错误的决定。:(
古语：一失足成千古恨，回头已是百年身:(
小弟, 三思而行啊! :o


CHINESE words of wisdom again...:eek:

Translation from Google Translate service:

To compromise, but the result did not, wronged himself broke also
Soft-hearted moment, made a wrong decision
As the old saying: without fire, a hundred years back is the body
Brother, think twice ah

[smartke]

A crude version goes something like this:

li gong simi lan jiao??? OR li gong simi jiao wei??? :D

hahahahaha... typical 'ah beng' slang... but i LIKE!! lolx... :p:p

[teebs_darklord]

hahahahaha... typical 'ah beng' slang... but i LIKE!! lolx... :p:p

Last time many many many years ago during BMT, this is wat all the Hokkien peng will say mah...:D

[smartke]

Last time many many many years ago during BMT, this is wat all the Hokkien peng will say mah...:D

last time?

last time many many many years ago, police wear undies/shorts ler... :p

so, keep those in memory la... :D

[teebs_darklord]

last time?

last time many many many years ago, police wear undies/shorts ler... :p

so, keep those in memory la... :D

hahahahahaha...:D

[Thanatas]

Just to clarify a bit on is it in the Malaysian girl's nature doubt.

Last time I also had a malaysian chinese gf, but she never sting money on me. Because she stays with me and buy all the household stuff, I give her about $300-500 a mth for the expenses. Sometimes, expenses more than that she just pay by herself. And when I give her the expenses, she will still say this month ok, never spend much, last mths money can still last this mth.

Still quite a lot of other things but just want to say it is in nature and character and not nationality.

And TS, don't take it anymore, make a break.

[see see only]

CHINESE words of wisdom again...

Translation from Google Translate service:

To compromise, but the result did not, wronged himself broke also
Soft-hearted moment, made a wrong decision
As the old saying: without fire, a hundred years back is the body
Brother, think twice ah

Wahahaha ..... :D

Well done with the translation bro td .... errrr but i tot is 三思 :rolleyes:

think 3 times instead of twice :rolleyes: ...... :D

[newhere]

Hi guys

seeking your opinion.

i have a GF for past 2 years and she has been staying with me since.
she is very keen to get married but i am still very comfortable with what i am .

one serious thing that is bothering me is the financial aspects.
well , my GF is kinda of very money minded to the extend she does not wants to spend anything on our common stuff than herself.

list of examples.
1 ) wedding cost.
she expect me to give up all my bonus for wedding cost but she get to keep hers.
2 ) travel holiday
she expect me to pay for everything when she is the one who want to travel.
3 ) household expenses
she stayed with me for past 1yr plus , and everything is paid by me.
even when the fridge is empty , she would not stock up.
even she goes to NTUC , she would buy only her stuff.
4 ) daily meals
i dine with her , pick her up from work. but she just dun automatic to pay for some of the meals . expect me to pick up tab.

even when i am jobless for past 5 months , she still behave as if nothing.
never automatic.

during CNY , she expect me to buy new yea goodies for her parents but never even bother to buy anything for my side. worst , she buy stuff for her family and never buy anything for the home she stayed.

i do love her but this is the time that been holding me back.
spoken to her before and she think i am insulting her.
her opinion is that guy should pay for everything.

do you think i should marry such girl ?

advise please

When you marry her, its the end of your life as you know it. Stay married, you pay for everything, divorce, Women's Charter will ensure you pay for everything.

[paul55ho]

Sounds like she knows you better than you know yourself. This topic is becoming more like how to make a clean break now. Well, you said it yourself, you have a soft heart. And after a few years, good or bad times, still will have some feelings.

Why don't you just give her a time frame to move out and in the meantime, demonstrate your determination by not sleeping in the same room, avoid speaking to her and doing things together.

I have a sneaky suspicion that if you are able to do the above, she will have a heart to heart talk to you and promise you that she will try to change. But, cross the bridge when it comes to that. Display you determination first.

Bro,then every month time to pay rent,she'll come visit TS then how?

[sage2000x]

I think she's not for you.

You have already pointed out her worst behavior. It's is good thing that you hesitate.

Don't feel guilty about leaving this one-sided love.

[newhere]

Hi guys

seeking your opinion.

i have a GF for past 2 years and she has been staying with me since.
she is very keen to get married but i am still very comfortable with what i am .

one serious thing that is bothering me is the financial aspects.
well , my GF is kinda of very money minded to the extend she does not wants to spend anything on our common stuff than herself.

list of examples.
1 ) wedding cost.
she expect me to give up all my bonus for wedding cost but she get to keep hers.
2 ) travel holiday
she expect me to pay for everything when she is the one who want to travel.
3 ) household expenses
she stayed with me for past 1yr plus , and everything is paid by me.
even when the fridge is empty , she would not stock up.
even she goes to NTUC , she would buy only her stuff.
4 ) daily meals
i dine with her , pick her up from work. but she just dun automatic to pay for some of the meals . expect me to pick up tab.

even when i am jobless for past 5 months , she still behave as if nothing.
never automatic.

during CNY , she expect me to buy new yea goodies for her parents but never even bother to buy anything for my side. worst , she buy stuff for her family and never buy anything for the home she stayed.

i do love her but this is the time that been holding me back.
spoken to her before and she think i am insulting her.
her opinion is that guy should pay for everything.

do you think i should marry such girl ?

advise please

Well, if she cooks you 3 meals a day, cleans your house, wash your car, takes care of your parents' needs, satisfies you in bed and willing to look after your children 24/7, then I think it's a fair deal. If she's a princess you have to hire a maid to look after, good luck to you man.

[kurbit]

Yoz bro, you should ask yourself what is marriage to you!

Love you deep deep, is not marriage! Sometimes the one you married is not the person u love the most, but the person who you can live with for the rest of your life.

[Komuso]

Bro TS, the truth hurts, but it's plain and simple - bail out while you still can.

If you're still hung up with feeling guilty about driving her out, try some reverse psychology. Pretend to have picked up gambling and keep pestering her for money to clear off your "debts".

My bet is that she will either dump you on her own accord, or if she does support you, at least you have a means of recovering some of your funds.

This method is rather insidious and requires some acting skills :D But I think when her vicious side comes out in full you will have not much guilt to deal with when you finally throw her out.

[Glock]

get out

get out while you still can

it is so many singapore women are like this that i say that almost no singapore woman is worth marrying

this kind of bitch watch too much TV show , they think they are some kind of princess

even if her tits are the most beautiful tits you have ever seen , one day they will sag and there will be better tits for you

find someone else

i tell you , if she suddenly find some angmoh man who likes her , all of a sudden she is prepared to spend her own money

this kind of bitch is all the same



Hi guys

seeking your opinion.

i have a GF for past 2 years and she has been staying with me since.
she is very keen to get married but i am still very comfortable with what i am .

one serious thing that is bothering me is the financial aspects.
well , my GF is kinda of very money minded to the extend she does not wants to spend anything on our common stuff than herself.

list of examples.
1 ) wedding cost.
she expect me to give up all my bonus for wedding cost but she get to keep hers.
2 ) travel holiday
she expect me to pay for everything when she is the one who want to travel.
3 ) household expenses
she stayed with me for past 1yr plus , and everything is paid by me.
even when the fridge is empty , she would not stock up.
even she goes to NTUC , she would buy only her stuff.
4 ) daily meals
i dine with her , pick her up from work. but she just dun automatic to pay for some of the meals . expect me to pick up tab.

even when i am jobless for past 5 months , she still behave as if nothing.
never automatic.

during CNY , she expect me to buy new yea goodies for her parents but never even bother to buy anything for my side. worst , she buy stuff for her family and never buy anything for the home she stayed.

i do love her but this is the time that been holding me back.
spoken to her before and she think i am insulting her.
her opinion is that guy should pay for everything.

do you think i should marry such girl ?

advise please