Just needed a channel to vent

[Yaphets]

I'm a unhappy married man. Recently, I really cannot tahan my wife anymore and decided to divorce her. We have one kid and currently another one in her womb 8 weeks old. However, we both decided to abort it because we don't have time to take care of the second one. And also we both know that our relationship is getting sour. So giving birth to another one doesn't make sense at all. I just needed a place where no one knows me to vent out everything. Below is my exact sentiments and words I wanna tell her after the abortion and before we divorce.



I'm sorry for being selfish. No amount of apology can ever make up for what I have done and will do. Although I know that we can never be together for the next decade, I still want to give you the best of the remaining days we have left. Call me selfish, call me asshole, call me bastard and whatever names you can think of. Because I can only nod in agreement. Today, you let me rekindle how it feels like to at the initial stages when we were still dating. When I would hold your hands, let you lie on my shoulders and hug you tight when you sleep. I almost wanted to U-turn and tell myself why not forget about separation? But when you snapped at me upon lending me your phone made me realize that no matter what, we cannot really live together for long. I'm tired of you and I bet you are tired of trying to please me. And so I thought it would be better for us to free ourselves of everything and live the life we individually desire. I'll always remember you for who you are, rest assured. And I sincerely hope that you will be able to pick yourself up from this and live life courageously unlike the past you. Upon typing this very sentence, it felt heart wrenching and I honestly felt like I needed to protect you from all harm there is. But to do that, perhaps I have to sacrifice myself. Perhaps I love myself more than you. Perhaps I've never truly opened up my heart and tried to accept you for who you are. Perhaps I'm blinded by my destiny and am not satisfied with the simple pleasures of life. I really don't know. But knowing that I slightly teared while typing out this heart felt message makes me wanna delete and never let you see this. I feel like going back all the way and don't ever hurt you and all. Because I can imagine the pain and agony that you will have upon receiving this whole long message. Am I wrong? Or am I just plain selfish? All I wanted is just a new start. Flashes of our memories suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Not that we have many to reminisce. I feel sorry that I have broken the vow and pledge to love you forever, for rich and for poor, for better and for worst, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish till death do us apart. I'm sorry for being a loser. But I swear that the day we married was the happiest day of my life. Although I did not really show it. I know I don't show a lot of my feelings to you. I'm really sorry.

[hamsapkwai]

That`s sad. Did you guys stop talking?

Did u react instantly and told her that u did not like being snapped at when it happened?

I learned in life that u must stop an unpleasant action immediately by giving feedback . Or people will just take u for granted and walk all over you.

But i commiserate with you that u have come to this juncture.

:(

[Big Sexy]

mate...before you do anything...
read the WOMEN'S CHARTER
http://www.sammyboyforum.com/showthread.php?t=239909

and this thread..

All you need to know about "Marriage/Divorce" under the SG Law (http://www.sammyboyforum.com/showthread.php?t=40761)


I'm a unhappy married man. Recently, I really cannot tahan my wife anymore and decided to divorce her.

[hamsapkwai]

Maybe he is a Muslim? 3 Talaks can already , no need to read through that maze.

3 Talaks via sms used to be acceptable even but not anymore . Damn!!!

TS tell me u are Muslim ?

http://app.syariahcourt.gov.sg/syariah/front-end/TypeOfDivorce_Talak_E.aspx

[Big Sexy]

why dont you read the threads as well..
it covers that as well..
Maybe he is a Muslim?
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[Sen5eS]

Talk to a counsellor ? She snaps at you and you react negatively ?

Sorry to hear about the plans for your unborn tho ...

Things will work out one way or another.

[Yaphets]

Nope I'm not a Muslim. I'm Chinese.

Anyway, thanks for the consolations. I didn't expect any replies actually. Last night, she rejected my hugs and last efforts to be a good husband for the remaining days we are married. I guess there isn't any room for negotiating or contemplating a reconcile.

[Reoxy]

Nope I'm not a Muslim. I'm Chinese.

Anyway, thanks for the consolations. I didn't expect any replies actually. Last night, she rejected my hugs and last efforts to be a good husband for the remaining days we are married. I guess there isn't any room for negotiating or contemplating a reconcile.

You already sent an ultimatum.

You got her to abort your unborn child.

How do you expect her to react to you?

If she made you cut off one of your balls how would you react?

Being born with a willy comes with great responsibility. One of these is NEVER TO KILL YOUR OWN BABY.

[RealEstateGuy]

Braddah, both of you should drop your egos and seek marraige counseling to see if you can as a team make it work. Only after that should you both make hasty decisions and accuse each other of not fufilling promises. Have you tried that yet? Give it a try. Might take your wife or yourself some time to agreet to it but its worth a try for the sake of keeping together the family. Another way to look at it is you both already know each others likes and dislikes, why not work on the known rather than seek new partners which will be totally unknown as far as personality clashes and/or compatabilities? Keep us posted braddah though your outlet should not be SBF and a counselor instead we are still here to help you as much as we are qualified to do.

[PuTonRen]

I'm a unhappy married man. Below is my exact sentiments and words I wanna tell her after the abortion and before we divorce.



Bro,

I always believe that when a couple comes together and becomes husband and wife, it is the most beautiful chemistry of God (or Buddha, or the almighty as per your religion). The birth of a baby from marriage is the results of a strong and perfect chemical reaction. It saddens me that you are going to break both beautiful things. I agree with what one of the brothers said "... do not kill your own baby!".

From your message, I can sense that you still have feeling towards her. A simple one time refusal when you try to hug her does not signify the end of a relationship. Imagine the sadness that a mother, having to abort a baby, has. Would you think she is still in a right state of mind of accepting your hug?

I am now at my advanced age, and I have seen situations like yours. Many of them have resulted in good ending, i.e. reconciliation and happy family thereafter, while a minority has sad ending. Why not try to patch up by engaging a third party to try to mend the fence. I believe both of you still have feelings in each other, and strenghtened by the existence of the kid(s) that you have, you stand a good chance to remain together.

I am an old man and have been married for many years, and I always tell my wife, and she agrees that two persons can be together only through mutual understanding and tolerance. No two persons are born the same and behave in the same manner; and they will stay together if they accept that they are different.

It is indeed my sincere hope that both of you will remain as husband and wife, for the sake of your happiness, and that of your kids.

[sammyboyfor]

Nope I'm not a Muslim. I'm Chinese.


Just because you're Chinese doesn't mean you can't be a muslim. One's an ethnicity and the other's a religion.

As for your relationship it's pretty obvious there is no mutual respect so my advice is to end it as soon as possible. Affection and the lovey dovey side of any marriage fades over time but respect for each other is paramount for a relationship to last through thick and thin.

[ryanlim79]

You already sent an ultimatum.

You got her to abort your unborn child.

How do you expect her to react to you?

If she made you cut off one of your balls how would you react?

Being born with a willy comes with great responsibility. One of these is NEVER TO KILL YOUR OWN BABY.

bro, totally agree with you, NEVER EVER ABORT YOUR KID EVEN. THIS IS AS GOOD AS A MURDERER.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

I'm a unhappy married man. Recently, I really cannot tahan my wife anymore and decided to divorce her. We have one kid and currently another one in her womb 8 weeks old. However, we both decided to abort it because we don't have time to take care of the second one. And also we both know that our relationship is getting sour. So giving birth to another one doesn't make sense at all. I just needed a place where no one knows me to vent out everything. Below is my exact sentiments and words I wanna tell her after the abortion and before we divorce.



I'm sorry for being selfish. No amount of apology can ever make up for what I have done and will do. Although I know that we can never be together for the next decade, I still want to give you the best of the remaining days we have left. Call me selfish, call me asshole, call me bastard and whatever names you can think of. Because I can only nod in agreement. Today, you let me rekindle how it feels like to at the initial stages when we were still dating. When I would hold your hands, let you lie on my shoulders and hug you tight when you sleep. I almost wanted to U-turn and tell myself why not forget about separation? But when you snapped at me upon lending me your phone made me realize that no matter what, we cannot really live together for long. I'm tired of you and I bet you are tired of trying to please me. And so I thought it would be better for us to free ourselves of everything and live the life we individually desire. I'll always remember you for who you are, rest assured. And I sincerely hope that you will be able to pick yourself up from this and live life courageously unlike the past you. Upon typing this very sentence, it felt heart wrenching and I honestly felt like I needed to protect you from all harm there is. But to do that, perhaps I have to sacrifice myself. Perhaps I love myself more than you. Perhaps I've never truly opened up my heart and tried to accept you for who you are. Perhaps I'm blinded by my destiny and am not satisfied with the simple pleasures of life. I really don't know. But knowing that I slightly teared while typing out this heart felt message makes me wanna delete and never let you see this. I feel like going back all the way and don't ever hurt you and all. Because I can imagine the pain and agony that you will have upon receiving this whole long message. Am I wrong? Or am I just plain selfish? All I wanted is just a new start. Flashes of our memories suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Not that we have many to reminisce. I feel sorry that I have broken the vow and pledge to love you forever, for rich and for poor, for better and for worst, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish till death do us apart. I'm sorry for being a loser. But I swear that the day we married was the happiest day of my life. Although I did not really show it. I know I don't show a lot of my feelings to you. I'm really sorry.

Marriage is a sacrament.
Like building a house from the flat ground.
Even after building it, in time, cracks and problems will emerge.
This is where a MAN should do his part to repair it.
These damages of time are known as marital issues which every couple will have to go thru also known as the root to a long peaceful marriage or the beginning of the end depending on how one manages them.
For your case, no, you r not a loser, but you are someone who is not matured enuff to be married.
You lack the BOLLS to fix your marriage and rather throw in the towel for a quick fix.
Just because you wanna hug her & she refuse her advances, you give up?
Have you ever tot of how toolan she is wif u though u felt a hug?
Only you but no her in your head.
Wif this mindset, pls dun get married or you'll just wreck another woman's life & steal her youth!
You already killed an unborn child and as good as wrecked the life of the one that is already born!
1 person ruin 2 lives and killed 1
Yes, please divorce her & set her free, dun pull another innocent life into the sea!

[sammyboyfor]

Marriage is a sacrament.


You're living in the last century. Marriage is but a temporary union in this day and age. Why else do you think pre nuptial arrangements and family trusts are so popular?

If a wife brings no joy, it's time to move on to the next one. There's no point being stuck in a loveless state of matrimony. It certainly won't benefit the children.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

You're living in the last century. Marriage is but a temporary union in this day and age. Why else do you think pre nuptial arrangements and family trusts are so popular?

If a wife brings no joy, it's time to move on to the next one. There's no point being stuck in a loveless state of matrimony. It certainly won't benefit the children.

Wanna start again?
It's been a while.
Wat u say may be applicable in skippyland!
Pre-nuptial crap but here, not recognised
When was the last time u looked into the mirror to notice your skin colour?
You go there too long you start to tink u ang mo gao liao ah?

[sammyboyfor]

Wanna start again?
It's been a while.
Wat u say may be applicable in skippyland!
Pre-nuptial crap but here, not recognised
When was the last time u looked into the mirror to notice your skin colour?
You go there too long you start to tink u ang mo gao liao ah?

Pre nups may not be recognised in singapore yet but it's just a matter of time.

The divorce rate amongst the young has reached an all time high and it'll only get worse. Very few people in Singapore give a shit about their marriage vows anymore. They're more concerned about the apps on their iphones than they are about the state of their marriage.

http://www.singstat.gov.sg/stats/keyind.html



http://www.singstat.gov.sg/images/charts/chart6b.gif

In the meantime, the old farts may still be married but they spend a lot more time fucking whores than they do on keeping their marriage alive. The evidence is plain for all to see. Just look at the contents of this forum.

When in comes to extra marital sex, it's pretty obvious that sinkies are a lot worse than their western counterparts as the opportunities for commercial sex are far greater.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Pre nups may not be recognised in singapore yet but it's just a matter of time.

Ah ha, thus this is not in context unless its accepted by OUR aka SINKAPORE society!

The divorce rate amongst the young has reached an all time high and it'll only get worse. Very few people in Singapore give a shit about their marriage vows anymore. They're more concerned about the apps on their iphones than they are about the state of their marriage.

http://www.singstat.gov.sg/stats/keyind.html



http://www.singstat.gov.sg/images/charts/chart6b.gif
Yeah, thus moral values are all screwed in a united colours of Benetton society that sinkapore has become....just like the US of A and Ozzyland!

In the meantime, the old farts may still be married but they spend a lot more time fucking whores than they do on keeping their marriage alive. The evidence is plain for all to see. Just look at the contents of this forum.

When in comes to extra marital sex, it's pretty obvious that sinkies are a lot worse than their western counterparts as the opportunities for commercial sex are far greater.
What you do outside, stays outside.
What is your family vows, aka man's responsibility stays that way.
Look at our stupid puny island, young execs get job, buy car, 10yrs loan and not even enuff disposable income to spend, thus always seeing posts on how much one jug, tips how much, ST how much.......WEAK man!

[hamsapkwai]

Nope I'm not a Muslim. I'm Chinese.

Anyway, thanks for the consolations. I didn't expect any replies actually. Last night, she rejected my hugs and last efforts to be a good husband for the remaining days we are married. I guess there isn't any room for negotiating or contemplating a reconcile.

Brother that shows how much you understand women.

She`s staring divorcee status in the face in the coming months and you expect her to respond to your hugs?

You have done her a lot of hurt and women don`t forget things like that in a hurry and a hug does not right all the wrongs.

You guys got to sit down and really talk and in your case its gone real sour and a professional mediator is needed to save the situation.

For without a referee you both will be going for each other`s throat at the sound of the opening bell.

And be ready to accept responsibility for any perceived wrongdoings in the session.

[plmnc]

i also du lan with my wife...!!!!!!! :mad::mad::mad:

i think i on the verge of divorce liao.. i staying together for my daughter only...

[goodpartner]

As for your relationship it's pretty obvious there is no mutual respect so my advice is to end it as soon as possible. Affection and the lovey dovey side of any marriage fades over time but respect for each other is paramount for a relationship to last through thick and thin.

The fading part I've read u commented a few times, can u elaborate on the underline, perhaps by quoting some examples to enlighten bros here?

[DO_YOU_BJ]

i also du lan with my wife...!!!!!!! :mad::mad::mad:

i think i on the verge of divorce liao.. i staying together for my daughter only...

Sometimes,mit doesnt hurt to play smart.
Just stay cool, give her her space n try to avoid engaging her as much as possible.
Gonna explode, go somewhere else to chill
I understand how u feel, trust me cos we in da same boat!

[owl888]

TS, be a MAN. Keep the innocent baby! Please show your sincerity be repentant to your wife on the abortion part......

Also, I think both of u need to be separated for cooling down period of say 3 months to seriously think about divorce.

Juz my 2 cents:D

[sammyboyfor]

The fading part I've read u commented a few times, can u elaborate on the underline, perhaps by quoting some examples to enlighten bros here?

If you meet someone that you admire for qualities that go beyond your sexual needs, then the element of respect is established and it's cemented into the relationship right from the beginning.

On the other hand, if you marry a girl primarily because she's pretty, gives great blow jobs and has a nice tight pussy, then the chances of the relationship lasting are much slimmer. Once the sexual aspect of the relationship sours as it invariably will, the relationship is done for.

My partner in life has the same interests and hobbies that I have. We do things together and in some areas, she's more skillful than I am. I respect her for that. She, in turn, respects me for my patience in pursuing my goals and "never say die" attitude towards life.

Sex is the least important part of our relationship. We are best friends first and foremost. If we get to 80, we'll still be the best of friends long after my dick has shriveled up.

It is for this reason that I always advocate NOT marrying a whore, especially one you fucked commercially before you started the relationship. There is no way that mutual respect can exist in such a relationship. She'll forever view you as a whoremonger who pays for sex and you'll forever view her as a prostitute. The relationship is doomed from the beginning. Once the sexual aspect of the relationship sours as it invariably will, there's nothing left to hold things together and many factors that will invariably tear things apart.

[plmnc]

If you meet someone that you admire for qualities that go beyond your sexual needs, then the element of respect is established and it's cemented into the relationship right from the beginning.

On the other hand, if you marry a girl primarily because she's pretty, gives great blow jobs and has a nice tight pussy, then the chances of the relationship lasting are much slimmer. Once the sexual aspect of the relationship sours as it invariably will, the relationship is done for.

My partner in life has the same interests and hobbies that I have. We do things together and in some areas, she's more skillful than I am. I respect her for that. She, in turn, respects me for my patience in pursuing my goals and "never say die" attitude towards life.

Sex is the least important part of our relationship. We are best friends first and foremost. If we get to 80, we'll still be the best of friends long after my dick has shriveled up.


yes, i agree...but my wife's temper really volatile....sigh

[sammyboyfor]

yes, i agree...but my wife's temper really volatile....sigh

Get a new one. Why put up with shit. Life is short. ;)

[goodpartner]

If you meet someone that you admire for qualities that go beyond your sexual needs, then the element of respect is established and it's cemented into the relationship right from the beginning.


Thank you for the elaboration, so we better draw a list of items why (if any) we respect our partners outside of sex/lovy dovy feelings before committing to a long term r/s. Good adviCe.

Still, it'll be a relentless pursue for that pretty babe who can give great BJ, AND also have great respectable qualities. Guys being guys, where physical attractive usually comes first.

I also better see why u think pros will not garner any respest right from the start, althought it seems some here "respect" the pros for the very same reason (for working as a pros to help the bigger 'me') :rolleyes:

yes, i agree...but my wife's temper really volatile....sigh

Bro, case in point, can u list out what qualities you RESPECT your wife for? Maybe that has changed over time, but what did you respect of her before u decided to tie the knot years ago?

[observer85]

Hi bro, saw what u wrote. i rarely comment on things but for ur case, i really wanna to voice out wat i think. Pls dun zip me as this is only my personal OPINION. Thanks

To me, Marriage is not just like 2 kids playing. it's a promise make for life !! And since u urself can say tat, u still think tat the day when u 2 get married was the happiest day of ur life, then y u dun TRY UR BEST to save this relationship? Why wanna to asked her to abort your unborn child !?? Do u know that it's ur own child u are gonna kill, do u ever put urself in ur wife shoes and think how will she feel if someone were to talk her tat ?? The unborn child are innocent, how can u just decided to kill it off just cause u claim tat u are not in a good relationship with ur wife now?
Since u say u really love her, why not tell her to keep the child and both make an agreement to work to improve ur relationship for the child?? i'm sorry to say this but i really dun think Bro Yaphets are trying hard enough to fix this problem.... Pls go do some real meaningful things to save e relationship instead of wasting time to write all this rubbish and emo one conner blaming fate !!!
Below are just my personal tho, pls dun be officered.

I'm a unhappy married man. Recently, I really cannot tahan my wife anymore and decided to divorce her. We have one kid and currently another one in her womb 8 weeks old. However, we both decided to abort it because we don't have time to take care of the second one. And also we both know that our relationship is getting sour. So giving birth to another one doesn't make sense at all. I just needed a place where no one knows me to vent out everything. Below is my exact sentiments and words I wanna tell her after the abortion and before we divorce.



I'm sorry for being selfish. No amount of apology can ever make up for what I have done and will do. Although I know that we can never be together for the next decade, I still want to give you the best of the remaining days we have left. Call me selfish, call me asshole, call me bastard and whatever names you can think of. Because I can only nod in agreement. Today, you let me rekindle how it feels like to at the initial stages when we were still dating. When I would hold your hands, let you lie on my shoulders and hug you tight when you sleep. I almost wanted to U-turn and tell myself why not forget about separation? But when you snapped at me upon lending me your phone made me realize that no matter what, we cannot really live together for long. I'm tired of you and I bet you are tired of trying to please me. And so I thought it would be better for us to free ourselves of everything and live the life we individually desire. I'll always remember you for who you are, rest assured. And I sincerely hope that you will be able to pick yourself up from this and live life courageously unlike the past you. Upon typing this very sentence, it felt heart wrenching and I honestly felt like I needed to protect you from all harm there is. But to do that, perhaps I have to sacrifice myself. Perhaps I love myself more than you. Perhaps I've never truly opened up my heart and tried to accept you for who you are. Perhaps I'm blinded by my destiny and am not satisfied with the simple pleasures of life. I really don't know. But knowing that I slightly teared while typing out this heart felt message makes me wanna delete and never let you see this. I feel like going back all the way and don't ever hurt you and all. Because I can imagine the pain and agony that you will have upon receiving this whole long message. Am I wrong? Or am I just plain selfish? All I wanted is just a new start. Flashes of our memories suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Not that we have many to reminisce. I feel sorry that I have broken the vow and pledge to love you forever, for rich and for poor, for better and for worst, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish till death do us apart. I'm sorry for being a loser. But I swear that the day we married was the happiest day of my life. Although I did not really show it. I know I don't show a lot of my feelings to you. I'm really sorry.

[miniskirt]

i also du lan with my wife...!!!!!!! :mad::mad::mad:

i think i on the verge of divorce liao.. i staying together for my daughter only...

whatever things you can go have a good talk with her and don't do the wrong things and regret for life.

[sgjoey]

Only two of you can decide whether or not you should remain as a couple. Do take the time to consider carefully what you wish to do.

As for the abortion of the foetus, I think you made the right decision. No point bringing a child into the world if he has to struggle against the odds in a single parent family. Contrary to what people say, human life is not that precious especially when it is not even fully human yet. Thousands perish every day in the world for one reason or another, and the world doesn't really care. Precious? There are already 7 billion humans in the world. Unless a child is really wanted, it is better for him not to be born.

And no, abortion is not murder because it's a foetus, and not fully human yet.

[SmsEs]

Do not murder. Give the baby to me. In some place, that's good money.

[Reoxy]

And no, abortion is not murder because it's a foetus, and not fully human yet.

The Pope does not agree with you on this.:cool:

[sgjoey]

The Pope? Despite appearances, he's a totally irrelevant human in the modern era. He also says no condoms. That's just how silly he is.

[Shuang_Jie_Gun]

no matter what happen, the baby is innocent and denying it a chance to come to this word is utter cruelty. :mad:

[SHalone]

Life is short, it might sound selfish but you need to be happy first before you can do more for people around you.
No one is prefect, for your daughter try to make it up to her as much as u can. And take good care of your parents. The rest are secondrary.
No point looking back, u let woman down and this has become a fact. But this doesn't stop u making a difference in another woman life.
For the baby you abort, I have no comments but hopefully if god willing he or she would be your baby in a better situation or family environment.

Good luck

[goodpartner]

Are killing sperms considered taking "lifes" too? :confused::rolleyes:

Because Sperms are cheap, Eggs are expensive. (http://www.sammyboyforum.com/showthread.php?t=254582)
:D

[sgjoey]

no matter what happen, the baby is innocent and denying it a chance to come to this word is utter cruelty. :mad:

Letting an unwanted child be born is much more cruel than aborting it.

Millions of fully grown cows, pigs, chickens and sheep are slaughtered everyday to cater to the human taste for animal meat. That is cruelty which is almost totally concealed from public eyes, and which the public doesn't want to know about anyway. The killing is only part of the cruelty, by the way. The conditions under which these farm animals have been produced entail months and years of cruelty for each and every one of them.

In comparison, the abortion of a fetus that can hardly feel anything is actually nothing.

[hickeybites]

I'm neither for nor against abortion... there are a myriad of factors/ reasons behind the couple's decision that none of us are privy to. Therefore I won't dare to judge.
However I believe that parenthood is a wondrous blessing (AND a HUGE responsibility that perhaps never ceases even when our kids grow old themselves).
I just can't imagine the emotions that TS's wife could be experiencing right now... impending grief & guilt of voluntarily killing one's own flesh & blood, after which likely more pain with divorce looming...

TS: from your post, it does seem that there's still the love between you & your wife. And if you can say sorry & feel sorry & even shed tears... perhaps all is not lost...
And please don't forget the child that you have now - it's not just about you & your wife -- your child is totally innocent. I hope that you & your wife is shielding the child from any animosity & fights. Whatever the decision that you both decide in the end, please ALWAYS put the child as priority! If ultimately you & your wife simply cannot live together as a couple anymore, at least do your utmost to be good parents & provide a stable environment for your child. Your child deserves that...

[ATAP]

Think TS marriage at a young age (around 16 or 17) which cause him to stray. He mentioned he go for his FIRST commercial sex because his wife did not cater for his needs. And in another post, he mentioned he tried FIRST commercial sex when he is about 18 years old. Think he should be still quite young if this is the case. We should talk some senses into him.

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

Think TS marriage at a young age (around 16 or 17) which cause him to stray. He mentioned he go for his FIRST commercial sex because his wife did not cater for his needs. And in another post, he mentioned he tried FIRST commercial sex when he is about 18 years old. Think he should be still quite young if this is the case. We should talk some senses into him.

I agreed with you.

Thread: why do I stray?
http://www.sammyboyforum.com/showthread.php?p=5946506&highlight=#post5946506

I'd like to answer this question changing it to "why do I stray"?

I used to be someone whom thought that I'd never stray in a relationship. But recently I just went for my first commercial sex. And I know that once I step into it, there will definitely be a second and a third time. So why did I stray? Simply because sex at home is unbearably mundane. I'm not accusing my partner of not being able to pleasure me enough. I'm accusing her at not trying to. So thus sex between us is totally boring for me. But it is not boring for her at all because I'm doing a great job satisfying her needs. How do I know? Because I've talked to her many times on the topic already. Until I find it really screwed up then I finally decided to go for commercial sex. So for me, it's because I'm being I'll treated and starved at home that's why I choose not to torture myself and eat out instead.

Thread: Re: Is 18 too young?
http://www.sammyboyforum.com/showthread.php?p=6389713&highlight=#post6389713

Actually I stepped into commercial sex at a young age too. Somewhere near or similar to your age if you ask. Many commented that I'm very young too. But you'll get used to it very soon la. Not really a big issue if that's your concern. But someone told me this on my first few visits before. If you stray once, you'll stray the second, third, fourth time etc. And it was proven to be really true. As in going for commercial sex. So I hope you can consider carefully first. Because it's pretty expensive if you work and pay for it yourself. Otherwise, if you have plenty of spare cash, why not?

Bros/Sis should advise and talk some sense into him cos saving a life is a good deed ;)

[plmnc]

now my wife back to normal again liao...but i still giving her the semi-cold treatment...

[Reoxy]

The Pope? Despite appearances, he's a totally irrelevant human in the modern era. He also says no condoms. That's just how silly he is.

He is definitely more relevant than you are.

Letting an unwanted child be born is much more cruel than aborting it.

Millions of fully grown cows, pigs, chickens and sheep are slaughtered everyday to cater to the human taste for animal meat.

In comparison, the abortion of a fetus that can hardly feel anything is actually nothing.

If the child is unwanted, why impregnate in the first place? One must be responsible for his actions and accept the full consequences.

Pls tell me you are a vegetarian. If not, you are just being hypocritical.

[hamsapkwai]

And could have been an outstanding Samster if allowed to be born.

Hell now we`ll never know :o

[sgjoey]

He is definitely more relevant than you are.

After years of sexual abuse of boys by priests and doing nothing about it? That's a rather strange interpretation of relevance.

If the child is unwanted, why impregnate in the first place? One must be responsible for his actions and accept the full consequences.

Because of people such as the Pope, for goodness sake! He forbids the use of condoms -- you still don't geddit, do you?

Pls tell me you are a vegetarian. If not, you are just being hypocritical.

I have the highest regard for vegetarians because I lack the will to be one. To recognise one's weakness is not to be hypocritical. It is because of my awareness of the cruelty of farm practices that I KNOW that the abortion of a fetus is nothing compared to that.

[BBSS]

Dear Bros here,

just my experience to share. I am married to a KTV gal for 3 years and we still live separately.
Everything is ok with my 1 year 2 times visit and her visiting to apply for PR for us to get a HDB.
Initially our agreement is that she will stay in sg after I am financially stable.
I owed some credit cards bill.
But I think things took a turn after her dad passed away and I neber showed enough care for her.
For the last 1.5 years, she give me the cold shoulder and when we talk over the phone, she seems not interested at all.
I met her in BJ last month and she was still that cold. I know something was wrong and she even dare to open her QQ chatting with someone she label My Dear.
Lan Lan tok to her on this and that is her BF. And say I can divorce her any time.
Have to say that I really love her alot. So I tell her she can do wat she want right now and just let me take care of her when she is 60 yrs old.
She got a weak heart and I really need to take care of her in my opinion.
Deep inside I really felt hurtful. Even now I am back in sg, I also miss her despite her affairs.
Think I am the most pitiful peerson in life right now. But then again, I was in vietnam for a few days recently and went to some ktv whereby the charbo so swee and treat you so well. A little tempted but still what I want to say is
I think I owed my wife alot and I gonna stick to her forever.

Any comments is welcome.

[Reoxy]

After years of sexual abuse of boys by priests and doing nothing about it? That's a rather strange interpretation of relevance.

The relative level or relevance remains the same: He is more relevant to the world than you are.

Because of people such as the Pope, for goodness sake! He forbids the use of condoms -- you still don't geddit, do you?

There are many ways of contraception. When accidents happen because one does not take precautions, one must be responsible and bear the consequence. People do what they want to do but yet are not fully prepared to take responsibility.

It is because of my awareness of the cruelty of farm practices that I KNOW that the abortion of a fetus is nothing compared to that.

This is hypocrisy at its worst.

In Chinese context, the Tiger is considered the most vicious of all animals. Having said that, we Chinese have a saying: Even a Tigeress does not eat her own cubs.

Why would anyone want to make comparison with animals?

[Reoxy]

Dear Bros here,

Any comments is welcome.

My comment is that you start your own thread instead of hijacking another's.:D

[BBSS]

My comment is that you start your own thread instead of hijacking another's.:D

Lol. No need lah.

[goodpartner]

Dear Bros here,

just my experience to share. I am married to a KTV gal for 3 years and we still live separately.
Everything is ok with my 1 year 2 times visit and her visiting to apply for PR for us to get a HDB.
Initially our agreement is that she will stay in sg after I am financially stable.
I owed some credit cards bill.
But I think things took a turn after her dad passed away and I neber showed enough care for her.
For the last 1.5 years, she give me the cold shoulder and when we talk over the phone, she seems not interested at all.
I met her in BJ last month and she was still that cold. I know something was wrong and she even dare to open her QQ chatting with someone she label My Dear.
Lan Lan tok to her on this and that is her BF. And say I can divorce her any time.
Have to say that I really love her alot. So I tell her she can do wat she want right now and just let me take care of her when she is 60 yrs old.
She got a weak heart and I really need to take care of her in my opinion.
Deep inside I really felt hurtful. Even now I am back in sg, I also miss her despite her affairs.
Think I am the most pitiful peerson in life right now. But then again, I was in vietnam for a few days recently and went to some ktv whereby the charbo so swee and treat you so well. A little tempted but still what I want to say is
I think I owed my wife alot and I gonna stick to her forever.

Any comments is welcome.

Classic....

[sgjoey]

The relative level or relevance remains the same: He is more relevant to the world than you are.

Maybe the Pope is more relevant to the Catholics and other medievalists, but to the rest of the modern world, he's probably just an embarassment.

There are many ways of contraception. When accidents happen because one does not take precautions, one must be responsible and bear the consequence. People do what they want to do but yet are not fully prepared to take responsibility.

The condom is one of the best ways to prevent such accidents. And when all else fails, going for an abortion instead of bringing an unwanted child into the world IS being responsible!

For me, someone who uses his power to try to forbid others to use condoms is an arch-devil.

This is hypocrisy at its worst.

In Chinese context, the Tiger is considered the most vicious of all animals. Having said that, we Chinese have a saying: Even a Tigeress does not eat her own cubs.

Why would anyone want to make comparison with animals?

Just in case you are not aware, humans are another species of animals. We claim to be the most superior species, but our behaviour is worse in many respects. And I still don't understand why acknowledging my failing is considered hypocritical.

May I repeat that abortion of human fetuses is NOTHING compared to the amount of daily suffering we inflict on millions of animals who are as capable of feeling pain as you or I. I wonder where is your sense of proportion. Or are you just being hopelessly speciestic and therefore unable to see anything beyond human interest?

[BBSS]

Classic....

Classic? I am not a director who shoot classic movies leh.
But so far I must say I live a sad live. After going to vietnam for the few days trip, I feel I am now more open..... er not sure what it means.
And I must say if wifey really ask for divorce, I will agree.

[Reoxy]

Maybe the Pope is more relevant to the Catholics and other medievalists, but to the rest of the modern world, he's probably just an embarassment.

The condom is one of the best ways to prevent such accidents. And when all else fails, going for an abortion instead of bringing an unwanted child into the world IS being responsible!

For me, someone who uses his power to try to forbid others to use condoms is an arch-devil.

I refrain from continuing in a religious squabble. Every religion has their own basic principles but ultimately the core principle is to do good. I do not see any good in killing an unborn baby by a MARRIED couple simply because they "have no time". In that case, they should invest in a few more seconds of putting on a condom or spending a few bucks in buying a pill or any other ways of preventing pregnancy.

When one engages in unprotected sexual intercourse, one must be fully prepared to accept the potential adverse consequences. Let's see anyone try to abort AIDS or herpes when they get them "accidentally". But, back to the context of this thread, abortion is the easy way out, especially for the man. To both the woman and the unborn child, it is absolutely unfair. The whole basis of my argument is subjective and only within the context of this thread started by the TS.

He made his wife pregnant and took the easy way out of cajoling her to an abortion. To me that is irresponsible.

Just in case you are not aware, humans are another species of animals. We claim to be the most superior species, but our behaviour is worse in many respects. And I still don't understand why acknowledging my failing is considered hypocritical.

May I repeat that abortion of human fetuses is NOTHING compared to the amount of daily suffering we inflict on millions of animals who are as capable of feeling pain as you or I. I wonder where is your sense of proportion. Or are you just being hopelessly speciestic and therefore unable to see anything beyond human interest?

A whoremonger commented that the prostitutes are being treated inhumanely by their bosses. He also acknowledges that he will continue to pay these bosses for their supply of prostitutes because he is weak and cannot stop his addiction/ reliance on commercial sex. Is he a hypocrite?

The abortion stated by TS was when the wife was 8 weeks pregnant.

At 8 weeks, the development of the baby or as you would like to call it, fetus, is as follows:

•The embryo is measures about 18 mm (3/4 inch) in length.
•Their arms and legs are growing and location of the elbows and toes are visible..
•The feet and hand buds have appeared.
•Starts to practice moving (not felt by mom till week 20)
•The stomach is being made from part of the gut.
• The face is beginning to take shape.
•Your baby's mouth and nostrils are starting to develop.
•Teeth begin to develop under the gums.
•The eyes can now be seen as small hollows on each side of the head.

The arms and legs continue to develop - These limbs are stretching out more and more. Later on you will be feeling those feet and elbows up close and personal right in your bladder. The embryonic tail has almost disappeared.
The pituitary gland is also forming and the embryo is beginning to grow muscle fibers. The heart has divided into the right and left chambers and is beating about 150 beats a minute which is about twice the rate of an adult.

The baby's facial features are visible, including a mouth and tongue. The eyes have a retina and lens. The major muscle system is developed, and the baby starts to practice moving. The baby has its own blood type and the blood cells are produced by the liver now instead of the yolk sac.

Source from: http://www.baby2see.com/development/week8.html

My sense of proportion is derived as follows:http://www.worldometers.info/abortions/

As it stands when I am posting, there has been 33.5 million abortions so far since 1st Jan 2011 and counting.

[sgjoey]

I refrain from continuing in a religious squabble. Every religion has their own basic principles but ultimately the core principle is to do good. I do not see any good in killing an unborn baby by a MARRIED couple simply because they "have no time". In that case, they should invest in a few more seconds of putting on a condom or spending a few bucks in buying a pill or any other ways of preventing pregnancy.

When one engages in unprotected sexual intercourse, one must be fully prepared to accept the potential adverse consequences. Let's see anyone try to abort AIDS or herpes when they get them "accidentally". But, back to the context of this thread, abortion is the easy way out, especially for the man. To both the woman and the unborn child, it is absolutely unfair. The whole basis of my argument is subjective and only within the context of this thread started by the TS.

He made his wife pregnant and took the easy way out of cajoling her to an abortion. To me that is irresponsible.

The fact that one mistake has been made does not mean it is inevitable that one should commit another. Bringing an unwanted child into the world is an irresponsible thing to do.

A whoremonger commented that the prostitutes are being treated inhumanely by their bosses. He also acknowledges that he will continue to pay these bosses for their supply of prostitutes because he is weak and cannot stop his addiction/ reliance on commercial sex. Is he a hypocrite?

I don't know what your notion of a hypocrite is, but here is a typical dictionary definition: "A person who pretends to be what he is not." I do not pretend to be other that what I am -- a human who recognises the cruelty of how farm animals are treated, but who continues to consume meat. This may seem inconsistent, but I do see this as my failing. I wish I could refrain from meat-eating -- but the meat-eating culture is just too pervasive for me not to succumb after a time. How am I being hypocritical when there is no pretence?

The abortion stated by TS was when the wife was 8 weeks pregnant.

At 8 weeks, the development of the baby or as you would like to call it, fetus, is as follows:

•The embryo is measures about 18 mm (3/4 inch) in length.
•Their arms and legs are growing and location of the elbows and toes are visible..
•The feet and hand buds have appeared.
•Starts to practice moving (not felt by mom till week 20)
•The stomach is being made from part of the gut.
• The face is beginning to take shape.
•Your baby's mouth and nostrils are starting to develop.
•Teeth begin to develop under the gums.
•The eyes can now be seen as small hollows on each side of the head.

The arms and legs continue to develop - These limbs are stretching out more and more. Later on you will be feeling those feet and elbows up close and personal right in your bladder. The embryonic tail has almost disappeared.
The pituitary gland is also forming and the embryo is beginning to grow muscle fibers. The heart has divided into the right and left chambers and is beating about 150 beats a minute which is about twice the rate of an adult.

The baby's facial features are visible, including a mouth and tongue. The eyes have a retina and lens. The major muscle system is developed, and the baby starts to practice moving. The baby has its own blood type and the blood cells are produced by the liver now instead of the yolk sac.

Source from: http://www.baby2see.com/development/week8.html

My sense of proportion is derived as follows:http://www.worldometers.info/abortions/

As it stands when I am posting, there has been 33.5 million abortions so far since 1st Jan 2011 and counting.

It is a romantic myth that human life is precious. There are more than seven billion humans on earth today. Millions perish every year because they lack resources enough to survive and die prematurely and miserably. Why don't you weep for these fully human victims?

Truth be told, each of us is precious to ourselves. But to conclude mindlessly from here that human life is therefore precious and must be preserved at all costs is plain silliness and totally unrealistic.

A fetus is not even a fully formed human being at the bottomline, despite all your attempts to make it seem as if it is. I just wonder about the logic of your stand against abortion, and I suspect that religion is involved in this somewhere. Sure seems to be the case when you can respect a man as unworthy of respect as the pope.

Unfailingly, faith in religion results in muddled thinking. And please, it is a common misconception that the core message of religion is to do good. Religion has been the cause of wars and persecution from time immemorial.

[goodpartner]

Bros, let's cum back on track la...

If you meet someone that you admire for qualities that go beyond your sexual needs, then the element of respect is established and it's cemented into the relationship right from the beginning.


While researching further on the above enlightenment, I stumbled upon this:
Our sis should take note :D I think most guys still look for these qualities, although the "new age" female will say the ideas are dated.:rolleyes:

Qualities of a Good Wife

Every married man wishes to have a good wife. Many people advice the new bride to be a good wife to her husband. But what are the makings of a good or perfect wife? Many women do not know. Many of the qualities of a good wife are already inbuilt in a person and the rest can be developed.

In India the qualities of a good wife or eight noble virtues an ideal wife should have are summed up in the verse from Neethisaram.

"Karyeshu Dasi, Karaneshu Manthri; Bhojeshu Mata, Shayaneshu Rambha,

Roopeshu lakshmi, Kshamayeshu Dharitri, Satkarma Nari, Kuladharma Pathni".

Here are some of the Qualities a man looks in his wife.

1) Be pleasant: It is said that ‘we need to treat others the way we want ourselves to be treated.’ Never be rude to our husband, family and friends. Be warm, kind, positive, understanding and friendly. Work to be pleasant toward your husband. Don’t be one of those people who make everyone around you feel bad just because you’ve had a hard day. Welcome your husband with a smile when he comes home instead of a sour face. A good wife honors her hubby by keeping a pleasant tone in her voice, a happy smile on her face and a neat and clean appearance. Listen to him talk about his day especially if it was a difficult one. If you don't like how you partner treats you, take a minute to notice how you treat your partner and correct your behavior.

2) Treat your Husband with Respect: If you expect respect from others we need to treat others with respect too. Haven’t we all heard ‘Give respect and take respect’. Respect can be reflected in the way one talks and behaves. Always speak in a loving and refrain from speaking in a harsh manner. A good wife respects her hubby and she never chooses to belittle, strike, humiliate or otherwise harm him in private nor in public. It is better to watch what you say and to think your thoughts through before speaking as it is not possible to take back the words once they have been spoken. A good wife will treat her man with respect in front of others and at home.

3) Communicate: Communication is key to a good and solid marriage. Do not hide things from your husband or keep secrets after marriage. Be honest to him. Find time to sit and talk with your husband on a daily basis even if it is for only half an hour. If you let things bottle up and feel that you cannot share with your husband anything then your marriage is in trouble. Be a good listener when your husband is talking. You may have a dozen important things to tell him but allow him to talk first. Don't greet him with complaints and problems the moment he comes back from work. Good Communication also helps to build trust and strengthen your relationship. After marriage the wife and husband are a team or partners. Do not take any major decisions about the family without consulting with husband. Fights or problems may happen in between the two but do not let the world know about it rather solve it between yourselves. The fight you had last week over shopping or whatever is over and done with. So move on with it and stop rehashing old stuff and reminding him of his faults. Do not resort to name calling, hitting, spitting, breaking dishes or anything else when you lose your temper. If you do he may actually start to fall out of love with you and you could lose him all together.

4) Be Supportive: A husband expects wife’s support and understanding especially in times of troubles. A good wife loves her hubby through his successes and failures and provides reassurance when he's feeling down. She is a nurturer and an equal partner in the marriage. Support your husband in all stages of his career and life. Do not belittle your man or hurt his ego. It is often heard saying that ‘a wife can make a man or break a man’. There’s no quicker way to build resentment in your man than to criticize him or belittle him especially in front of others. Be proud of him on his accomplishments and genuinely complement him. If you do this you can expect your husband to behave with you in the same manner and also respect you more for your support and thoughtfulness. When you don’t agree with him respectfully let him know you don’t agree.

5) Do not nag: No man would like a nagging wife. If you want to get your own way ask him nicely. Many wives think that is the only way to get her husband to do things is by nagging. But the truth is that your nagging can create unwanted rift or can make things worse between the two of you. Your husband is a grown man with his own thoughts and desires. Just because you think he should be doing something particular doesn't mean he has to do it.

6) Give him his space: As a wife you need to understand you’re your husband has a life other than you also. He has his family, friends and colleagues who too are part of his life. He also may have some hobbies or passions he is involved in. Don’t expect his undivided attention. Don’t stop him if he wants to go out and hang out with his friends sometimes or engage in a hobby or sport that he likes. An interfering wife can sometimes be too irritating.

7) Keep him happy in Bed: Sexual intimacy is one of the most essential things in any marriage. Please your man in bed. If you cannot keep your man happy in Bed he would go where he can get it. After all, a Man is a man!

8) Plan Surprises: Men like surprises too. It can be anything like organizing his birthday party without him knowing about it or planning a special night of passion by playing a seductress. Your surprises do not have to be elaborate and can be as simple as making him his favorite snack or his favorite dishes once in a while even if you would rather eat something else.

9) Express your love and appreciation often: Men likes praises and appreciation. Make the best of your time together. Men like to hear the words ‘I love you’ too. Also join him in activities that he's interested in even though you would have preferred to do something else or give him a thoughtful gift once in a while. Make it a point never to forget the special days in his life. Pamper him very often, especially when he is at home. You can even cook for him or give him a good massage. Making him dependent on you by doing his chores when he is at home is not a bad idea. Let him miss you and think about you when you are not around. These gestures won’t go unnoticed and it may even inspire him to do something nice for you. Don't withhold affection.

10) Honesty, Loyalty and Dedication: A good wife would be honest, loyal and dedicated to her husband. Marriage is a life long commitment and the vows you have taken at the time of marriage should be kept in all conditions.

11) Prepare yourself: A good wife honors her hubby by keeping a pleasant tone in her voice, a happy smile on her face and a neat and clean appearance. Take special care about your appearance and everyday. Include exercises or yoga in your daily routine. Be hygienic. Some woman feel that once they are married why they should dress up or take care of their appearance. A man likes his wife to smell good. If you are unhealthy or not presentable your man may cheat you behind your back.

12) Prepare the House: Maintain a clean house all the time. Clear away the clutter and spend time decorating the house. Apart from this be wise with money and take all the responsibilities of a wife seriously without complaining.

I am sure any man would be happy to get a wife with all these qualities. Have I left anything? Please feel free to add through comments.

[stone08]

referring to the post just above. didnt want to quote as long text...

good luck finding such ideal wife...nowadays sg women like tiger and lioness, especially if they are working and still they expect to be treated like queens...

maybe go vietnam or thailand , still can find...lol

[goodpartner]

maybe go vietnam or thailand , still can find...lol

That, is exactly why there's a mismatched of expectation in this new era, where bros start seeking & buying wifes from less developed countries.

Those with the above qualities & exist in Sg are probably without C-cuppers, etc. So guys that are fortunate to have them as wifes are still not contended. Blessed are the men who can find such as wife, but even then, SBF still thrives with these bros....

[Iemanishere]

Dear bros, life is always like than from all ways you look at it.. Why u want to leave her? If it because of other party than I've got none to say.. But if not, try to work things out..

I'm a catholic, but am no alter boy.. Likely to burn in hell. When I die.. But I pray and make sure my kids have a better life.. And that is what I pray..

Never the less.. God bless

[Big Sexy]

did you also take care of your parents when they were 60????
damx...god must love stupid people....he made so many...


I know something was wrong and she even dare to open her QQ chatting with someone she label My Dear. Have to say that I really love her alot. So I tell her she can do wat she want right now and just let me take care of her when she is 60 yrs old.
.

[feelmetonight]

There is no difference in killing a child that's already been born and one that's still in the womb. The crime is the same.

[hamsapkwai]

did you also take care of your parents when they were 60????
damx...god must love stupid people....he made so many...

LMAO :D

10 characters

[askam]

If you meet someone that you admire for qualities that go beyond your sexual needs, then the element of respect is established and it's cemented into the relationship right from the beginning.

On the other hand, if you marry a girl primarily because she's pretty, gives great blow jobs and has a nice tight pussy, then the chances of the relationship lasting are much slimmer. Once the sexual aspect of the relationship sours as it invariably will, the relationship is done for.

My partner in life has the same interests and hobbies that I have. We do things together and in some areas, she's more skillful than I am. I respect her for that. She, in turn, respects me for my patience in pursuing my goals and "never say die" attitude towards life.

Sex is the least important part of our relationship. We are best friends first and foremost. If we get to 80, we'll still be the best of friends long after my dick has shriveled up.

It is for this reason that I always advocate NOT marrying a whore, especially one you fucked commercially before you started the relationship. There is no way that mutual respect can exist in such a relationship. She'll forever view you as a whoremonger who pays for sex and you'll forever view her as a prostitute. The relationship is doomed from the beginning. Once the sexual aspect of the relationship sours as it invariably will, there's nothing left to hold things together and many factors that will invariably tear things apart.

Very insightful and well said. Respect you for that.

[sgjoey]

There is no difference in killing a child that's already been born and one that's still in the womb. The crime is the same.

Abortion is not a crime in most developed countries. The decision to allow abortion was made because the issue had been thoroughly debated and a consensus was more or less reached that not to allow it is worse.

Clearly, aborting a fetus and killing a baby is totally different. Saying that they are the same simply reveals your mindless acceptance of what seems to be vaguely laudable in a moral sense, but is, in fact, totally mistaken. A fetus is not a fully formed human, unlike a baby.

[flcult]

So yr relationship with yr wife soured beyond redemption but u could still have sex with her n the make her pregnant?TS, there are pple out there who could kill to hv a baby in the family and u r ok with yr wife to abort yr own flesh n blood? U could really nd professional help,u r way farked up.