Trouble with a capital T...

[Wizrd]

.

This is a true story and not made up...I wish it was made up but unfortunately for me...it is not...please read and let me know what you think....



Last month, I was in Perth for 2 weeks...and as usual, I try my luck to hook a girl to keep me warm at night for at least those two weeks...

On the third day, tried the usual mall areas and at a book store, hooked one ang mo uni graduate student and spent a few hours together with her...she was pleasant and cute and always smiling...I love that...

Later that evening, kissed and rabba her at a darkish restaurant after dinner and she acted like she enjoyed it...
However...once I suggest to her to come back to my hotel...she suddenly say she love to but her husband is waiting for her at home...

NA BEI!!!!:mad:

Lan lan...go back by myself...fucking woman gave me her number and ask me to call her when I am next in town some more...KNN...I cannot wait till your husband is out of town lah...I am just passing through...luckily not very horny so still can control...

The next day after work...I went to a supermarket to buy some food stuff...saw this really cute Asian SYT...maybe around 22-25...well dressed and very sweet...my heart melted and I felt the need to hook her...

Walked near her and she received a phone call...she spoke Cantonese into the phone...wow...cool...I can handle that..

I pushed my trolley and stalked her a bit walking around Coles...then when she was choosing fruits...I made my move...

I started asking her about fruits and how to know which ones are ripe...and what fruits are in season...etc etc...

At first...she was friendly but kept a cool distance...I kept asking and making jokes...took me at least 10 minutes and many jokes before I made her laugh...after that...she opened up a bit more and we chatted about other stuff to buy...
Once I started to add Cantonese into our conversation...she warmed up even more...I became like her BFF...

We went to have Vietnamese food...then had coffee...then ice cream...

Long story short...we made a date for the next evening...

As before...coffee and cake...jalan jalan...steak dinner...jalan jalan...ice cream...coffee...back to my hotel....and next thing we knew...she was rushing around my hotel room in the morning to get ready for work...

Over the next 10 days or so...she came over to stay with me for 6 nights...we hit it off and playing house with her was really fun...our age difference was never mentioned and all was good...


She is Asian and we share the same values...we like the same food...same sense of humour...similar taste in movies...the sex was fantastic...yet...she has the western mentality so we can discuss anything openly...it felt right...I'm starting to think...this one is a keeper...


3 nights before I had to leave...we cuddled in front of the T.V...and she started talking about her family...I never thought to ask before, so this time I had to pay her some attention...how they migrated to Perth when she was 5 years old...what brother is doing...what sister is studying...yada yada yada...

She said she would really like me to meet her family...it's ok, she said...not like a boyfriend meeting parents type...just as a casual friend...no need to stress etc...

So I said sure...love to...

Since I was planned to leave in 3 days...she quickly called her mum to arrange that we meet for dinner at her house the night before I left...all sweet and great...who are you bringing back...oh just a friend...you'll like him, he is funny and smart...make sure Dad is there...blah blah blah...

Everything good and arranged so I thought to reward myself with a bit of good sex in the living room...we blew each other's bodies and minds...then we had a shower together...life is good...

Luckily...or unfortunately...while we were lying in bed getting ready to sleep...she took out her phone and started flipping through photos...hey, this is my brother...this is my sister and her boyfriend...my dog...my office...my best friend...the usual woman crap...I was losing interest but she was so happy showing me so I indulged her...which was lucky for me...

Then she showed me photos of her mum and dad...and my heart stopped beating...

KNNBCCB....:o

I said I needed the toilet and rushed there to lock myself in...holy fuck!!!!


Her father is my ITD platoon mate...and I remember carrying his oldest daughter (the woman I have been banging...) when she was 2 years old...I still remember my platoon mate joking with me then that girl girl loves this uncle because she would stop crying whenever I carried her...FUCK ME!!!

What is a man to do in this situation???

He and I lost contact 20 years ago...I didn't even know he migrated...

.....


There is a small part 2 to follow which complicates the whole story even further...but tell me bros....what would you have done about this??


Cheers for reading...


.

[banana81sg]

hmmmmmmmmm:rolleyes:

[A$$man]

Bro, you are fucked...

[likashing]

If u love the gal and wanna marry her, just come clean. Nothing wrong. My gfs are all between 25 - 30 yrs younger than me. Keeps me young.

I hope you are single, though.

[Wizrd]

Bro, you are fucked...


:( Yes bro...literally and figuratively....:o


.

[Wizrd]

If u love the gal and wanna marry her, just come clean. Nothing wrong. My gfs are all between 25 - 30 yrs younger than me. Keeps me young.

I hope you are single, though.


:eek:

WAIT...what?!?!?!?!?!

Who said anything about marriage??

No Bro...not going down that way...

3 other girlfriends all 19-23 years younger than me...this one takes the cake but it's not her age that is the problem...
:(


.

[herodieyoung]

:eek: O..M..G..

[dreamlight]

just go and say hi. not marriage what

[Wizrd]

:eek: O..M..G..


Y...E...S......I...N...D...E...E...D...:o


.

[Wizrd]

just go and say hi. not marriage what


Can't...how??

'Hey buddy...long time no see...How's life and by the way, I'm banging your daughter...' :eek:

I'm also worried about her reaction to the whole thing...not just my platoon mate...


.

[wilson80]

Wait for part 2..... interesting story

[Tazzymercs]

why not tell her the truth? lol scarly she got an uncle complex leh? lol but anyway truth lo come to this stage liao might as well prepare all of you guys for the worst lo...maybe she may have a good idea on how to proceed leh?

[oshkosh]

Ts

depends on your friend and his daughter personality. if they are open and dont mind the age gap, nothing wrong mah.

but it be funny if and when u guys get married as the groom is the same age as the bride's father.

but anyway, if its not serious, just say u meet next time ba as I think you are not mentally prepared.

cheers!

[Wizrd]

Wait for part 2..... interesting story

On the way bro...still thinking how to phrase the story...

why not tell her the truth? lol scarly she got an uncle complex leh? lol but anyway truth lo come to this stage liao might as well prepare all of you guys for the worst lo...maybe she may have a good idea on how to proceed leh?

Not so easy bro...

She might feel the need to tell her parents...then I'm not sure what will happen...:(


Ts

depends on your friend and his daughter personality. if they are open and dont mind the age gap, nothing wrong mah.

but it be funny if and when u guys get married as the groom is the same age as the bride's father.

but anyway, if its not serious, just say u meet next time ba as I think you are not mentally prepared.

cheers!


Thanks for the upzz bro...

But why is everyone using the M word?. I've only been with her less than 10 days...:confused:
We are not even at the stage of gf/bf yet...but yeah...I guess it would be funny right?..

Yes...you are correct bro...I did bail on the meeting...only thing I can think of at the time...


.

[jessicatan94]

Pitching up my tent here geez.

[Stud00]

Ts,

I nearly died laughing after reading your post..

oh oh... her daddy might be a SBF-rian too..

nah.. just kidding..

i can feel you.. this is quite a nasty situation u r in..:eek:

[asdfghjkl]

starting fire.. sounds good, continue! ;)

[1nottiboy]

This is some scary shit!

Anyway if I were you I would just tell her truthfully, see her reaction then decide what to do next.

[Wizrd]

.


Thanks to all the bros and campers setting up fire place and all...make sure BYO plenty of drinks and snacks ok? I suspect this saga may become quite drawn out...any bros want to set up food stands are welcome to help themselves.. :p


Before I get into part 2 which will complicate the hell out of the situation...let me quickly go through what I did and what happened after I found out...

So...there I was in the toilet...sitting in the bathtub and had a smoke...my head started to throb from the memories...and I also knew I couldn't hide in there until morning...

I made my way back to the bedroom...she was already half asleep...

She asked me quietly if I was ok...I bullshitted her that something is wrong with my stomach...but will be ok...just go to sleep, I told her...

She reached her arms out for a hug...I got into bed and gave her a hug and we kissed for a minute or two...then she rolled over...and was soon asleep...

The next day...I made all the arrangement to leave one day earlier...She couldn't come see me that night...so I didn't say anything to her about the new plan...we talked on the phone for a bit then she went to bed...I went to the 24 hour Vietnamese cafe for coffee...

It was quite cold...I think 13-15 degrees outside and I was only in shorts and tee shirt...but the cold felt good...kinda numbed the pain I felt inside...

I actually already finished my work there the day before and thought staying 2 extra days would give me time to check out the city...she was not in my original plan and now I had to skip town one day early because of her...


The next morning...the day of the dinner...and also the day I changed my ticket for to leave...I called her around mid morning to tell her that something came up and I had to leave early...sorry but no choice...etc blah blah....

She sounded surprised and worried...is everything ok? What's wrong...

No don't worry...it's work...they need me back in the office...so sorry...

What time is your flight?

Oh, it's 1545...

What time you going to the airport?

I'll be there around 1400...

ok, she said...I'll see you there...

My heart nearly exploded...You coming alone? I asked her...

Of course..she said...who else am I bringing??

Oh...nothing...forget I asked...as I sighed a big relief...

I packed and had lunch with an old friend living in Perth..then he sent me to the airport...

She came at 1415...and ran into my arms...we hugged...she kissed me and there were tears in her eyes...

We sat down for coffee...I told her I will visit her as soon as I can make plans for it...she said she will miss me...all the 'life leave death depart' type of drama lines...

She told me her plans...she had taken leave the next day (my original day of departure)...after dinner, she was going to come over and stay with me...then the next morning, we can have a leisurely breakfast outside...take a stroll along Swan river in the morning...have a picnic lunch in Kings park...then she was going to send me to the airport...our day, she said...

My heart broke...what a girl...

I told her to remember the plan...we will do all of that when I come visit her next...she laughed and nodded...

Too soon...my flight was boarding and I had to go...she held on to my hands but she smiled for me...said she wanted me to remember her smiling and not crying...

But...time wouldn't stop for us...so I had to go...

When I was inside...my phone beeped...she sent me a text with her photo...and asked me to think of her...I replied...of course...

That was 12 days ago...we have been texting each other everyday since...and she has been asking me to send her my photo...I keep acting blur because I know who will get to see my photo and I don't want that to happen yet...

I can't act blur forever...so I thought maybe some bros here will have a good idea on what I should do next...

Oh..yeah...the part 2...let me post that tomorrow evening...please let me know what any of you can come up with from what you know so far...

Thanks for reading...


Cheers.



.

[Tazzymercs]

BRO....lol i really wanted to say AI SEH man..but on the other hand i really hate you sia hahaha

ok la..one thing...i tot your motto was not to let the girl send you away or pick you up from the airport..you breaking your rules liao..

another thing..i think you KC the girl ah till i got a nagging little feeling that you are toying the line in between playing with feelings and otherwise lo

beside..i too, following a gut feeling..maybe she will surprise you by coming to SG then really ho seh liao...

girls ah they say one thing, like just casual friends only..but they think other wise lo...abit like you Indo surgeon gf..

but anyway...its either you stick to your motto, cut her loose or really have to consider lo you playboy hahaha...

anyway you teh gong lo..if you use fake names in courting her...please dun send photos la if not father see liao sure tio liao lo..unless you plan to you know fuck that lo lol anyway not in contact with papa bear also ma

if you use real name..send only...then let papa bear be surprise..who knows what maybe in store for you...

but you know yourself la if you really wan the girl for sex or for love lo...if for sex dun care liao lo..if for love..bro..i urge you to reconsider lo..although you may have juicy details..well..still got your indo cuisine to consider ba..i dun think got this thing call best of both worlds de..sometimes have to make minor concessions de..if make minor adjustments..can it still be consider best of both worlds? if not according to your original plans? no free lunch in this world bro hope you understand where i come from lol

i dun condone eating out lol just i dun really enjoy playing with food hahaha coz who knows what will come to bite me back

[henabi]

Oh man... Wiz... That's what I call a "SMALL WORLD"....
I totally understand your feelings right now. Fucking your camp mates daughter...
But I guess theres only two things to do:
1) go MIA. Which may cause even more repercussion if you HAPPEN to bump into them again in Perth or SIN
2) come clean. Tell her the truth and drop the whole relatiOnship and hopefully it ends on a good note. At least even if you bump into her and your camp mate next time, the awkwardness is there but at least only slightly...

[iFuck]

Indeed is a small world . Who would expect this far away from home ?

One thing for sure , you are in deep shit.
Is "between a rock and a hard place".

Telling her the truth...she will be deeply hurt. Might take very long to recover.
Just disappear...I guess not much difference.

Keen to know the outcome. Any spectacular escape ?
Another case study. :p

[piasen]

Given this situation, come out clean Bro!! there is an honor to maintain with your camp buddy!! everything else is fair and you have not done anything wrong. you have been a gentleman and stay that way. but do mention to her that you freaked out .. and Here is the Truth.

you may not be in bf/gf domain.. but it has not been transactional fxxx either; there is a silent code of being fair and honest here. She is doing that and you need to do your best from that front.

that would be my two cents!!

[acidicavex]

Ppl always like to say "Singapore is very small mai guai. LAN sure can meet one" but for your case TS he can now tell everyone "the world is very small blab blab blab" no such experience and confirm I don't want to be in such a scene. I would really try to avoid see her or keep in touch even u have feeling for her. U wouldn't want her father aka your platoon mate to track u down. And the 1st thing that happen after u open the door is a fist punching your face.

[pakalolo]

Bro, the thing you can do is to come clean with her, after all she was expecting to have a relationship and not just ONS.
She will be hurt for sure but girls get over fail relationship better than guy.
And she will not tell her daddy about you,no girls will tell their daddy she got screwed by his mate.
At most she will tell her daddy that she met someone that used to carried her many years ago.

[Wizrd]

BRO....lol i really wanted to say AI SEH man..but on the other hand i really hate you sia hahaha

ok la..one thing...i tot your motto was not to let the girl send you away or pick you up from the airport..you breaking your rules liao..

another thing..i think you KC the girl ah till i got a nagging little feeling that you are toying the line in between playing with feelings and otherwise lo

beside..i too, following a gut feeling..maybe she will surprise you by coming to SG then really ho seh liao...

girls ah they say one thing, like just casual friends only..but they think other wise lo...abit like you Indo surgeon gf..

but anyway...its either you stick to your motto, cut her loose or really have to consider lo you playboy hahaha...

anyway you teh gong lo..if you use fake names in courting her...please dun send photos la if not father see liao sure tio liao lo..unless you plan to you know fuck that lo lol anyway not in contact with papa bear also ma

if you use real name..send only...then let papa bear be surprise..who knows what maybe in store for you...

but you know yourself la if you really wan the girl for sex or for love lo...if for sex dun care liao lo..if for love..bro..i urge you to reconsider lo..although you may have juicy details..well..still got your indo cuisine to consider ba..i dun think got this thing call best of both worlds de..sometimes have to make minor concessions de..if make minor adjustments..can it still be consider best of both worlds? if not according to your original plans? no free lunch in this world bro hope you understand where i come from lol

i dun condone eating out lol just i dun really enjoy playing with food hahaha coz who knows what will come to bite me back



Hahahaha...bro....


Don't hate me lah bro...we all tan jiak based on our own talents and circumstances...Chinese saying: 'person in river lake, body not up to self'...is very true..:o
For someone like me...I never eat in...so if eating out is the only option...no point always eating the same dish, right??


Yes...I agree with you that I broke my own rule...but please understand...at that time, my 'square inch big mess' already...at least I covered my tracks...I hope...

My cover story is that I am originally from Malaysia and am P.R. and living in the U.S...so unless picha lobang...unlikely she will find me...also one of the reasons I cannot meet the parents...because they know me...sure way to give up the plot...most bros reading won't know my operating style so I didn't add that to my story here...

I understand that women can say one thing and mean another thing...but my conscience is clear as long as I remain upgront and do not make promises that I never intended to keep...we cannot help it when others make all kinds of assumptions...nor should we be held accountable for that....but we can be upright and at least be honest with what we want from others...that way...the ball is not in my court should they feel hurt...

I think you are right...cutting her loose may be the only option...:(


Cheers bro...


.

[Wizrd]

Oh man... Wiz... That's what I call a "SMALL WORLD"....
I totally understand your feelings right now. Fucking your camp mates daughter...
But I guess theres only two things to do:
1) go MIA. Which may cause even more repercussion if you HAPPEN to bump into them again in Perth or SIN
2) come clean. Tell her the truth and drop the whole relatiOnship and hopefully it ends on a good note. At least even if you bump into her and your camp mate next time, the awkwardness is there but at least only slightly...


Indeed is a small world . Who would expect this far away from home ?

One thing for sure , you are in deep shit.
Is "between a rock and a hard place".

Telling her the truth...she will be deeply hurt. Might take very long to recover.
Just disappear...I guess not much difference.

Keen to know the outcome. Any spectacular escape ?
Another case study. :p


Thanks bros..

You idea is good...MIA seems the only sensible option left...

Since I have not bumped into them in 20 odds years...chance of that happening is very slim...

Cheers bros....


.

[Wizrd]

Given this situation, come out clean Bro!! there is an honor to maintain with your camp buddy!! everything else is fair and you have not done anything wrong. you have been a gentleman and stay that way. but do mention to her that you freaked out .. and Here is the Truth.

you may not be in bf/gf domain.. but it has not been transactional fxxx either; there is a silent code of being fair and honest here. She is doing that and you need to do your best from that front.

that would be my two cents!!

Bro, the thing you can do is to come clean with her, after all she was expecting to have a relationship and not just ONS.
She will be hurt for sure but girls get over fail relationship better than guy.
And she will not tell her daddy about you,no girls will tell their daddy she got screwed by his mate.
At most she will tell her daddy that she met someone that used to carried her many years ago.



Thanks bros...but cannot...:o

There are more at stake here...I do like her a lot but this involves too many people...the web of lies is so difficult to untangle that I am not sure I even dare to try...

When I tell you the part two...you may understand why I rather hurt her than hurt her father...

Cheeers bros...


.

[Wizrd]

Ppl always like to say "Singapore is very small mai guai. LAN sure can meet one" but for your case TS he can now tell everyone "the world is very small blab blab blab" no such experience and confirm I don't want to be in such a scene. I would really try to avoid see her or keep in touch even u have feeling for her. U wouldn't want her father aka your platoon mate to track u down. And the 1st thing that happen after u open the door is a fist punching your face.


Thanks bro...agree with you...

Time to cut the ties I think...


Cheers bro...

.

[AlexV]

Wow.

What happened is every fathers worst nightmare. So don't meet him, and don't tell him, UNLESS you are serious about a long term relationship with the girl.

if not, and you know it cannot work (i.e you aren't going to relocate to Perth) then you have to MIA.

Or make up some story so her heart won't be so broken - like spending time with her made you realise that the age difference is too great.

[woodywoody]

worst case, just pretend that you are the elder or younger bro of yourself if you actualy have to meet the father....after 20 yrs, i think chances are quite high that tis will work if you can act well. if not, if you have to meet the father, just tell the truth that you got to know the daughter by coincidence and when she showed you the father's pic, you recognised him and therefore decided to hatch a plan to surprise him with the help of her daughter's arrangement. The daughter will be shocked, which u can explain as part of the total surprise....and i doubt she will be dumb enough to clarify there and then that you fucked her etc....

[henabi]

Bro Wiz... What about that Indonesian Female doctor you knew in Jakarta?!?!

That one no more Liao ah?!?!

Woody woody did point out a good point. You n your camp mate haven't contact and met for a good 20years. Seriously who will really remember you... Unless he has super photographic memory... Or you mentioned something which happened between both of you and it triggered his memory...

One thing for sure is probably "act blur live longer"...

Another thing to "dig" is her relationship with her dad. How close are both of them? Do they share alot of things with each other etc.
It may help you a bit to wiggle your way through if things get messy

[Wizrd]

Wow.

What happened is every fathers worst nightmare. So don't meet him, and don't tell him, UNLESS you are serious about a long term relationship with the girl.

if not, and you know it cannot work (i.e you aren't going to relocate to Perth) then you have to MIA.

Or make up some story so her heart won't be so broken - like spending time with her made you realise that the age difference is too great.

Yes bro...

Maybe cannot even jaga how heart broken she might be anymore...I think MIA is the best option and hope she will be fine after a while...


Cheers...

.

[Wizrd]

worst case, just pretend that you are the elder or younger bro of yourself if you actualy have to meet the father....after 20 yrs, i think chances are quite high that tis will work if you can act well. if not, if you have to meet the father, just tell the truth that you got to know the daughter by coincidence and when she showed you the father's pic, you recognised him and therefore decided to hatch a plan to surprise him with the help of her daughter's arrangement. The daughter will be shocked, which u can explain as part of the total surprise....and i doubt she will be dumb enough to clarify there and then that you fucked her etc....


Thanks bro...

But cannot...I doubt I can pretend that well...plus, over the course of a meal or two plus plus....I need to act almost retarded in order for him not to figure it out...

I recognise him on the photo immediately...don't think he will not do the same if he sees me...

Cheers anyway bro...

.

[Wizrd]

Bro Wiz... What about that Indonesian Female doctor you knew in Jakarta?!?!

That one no more Liao ah?!?!

Woody woody did point out a good point. You n your camp mate haven't contact and met for a good 20years. Seriously who will really remember you... Unless he has super photographic memory... Or you mentioned something which happened between both of you and it triggered his memory...

One thing for sure is probably "act blur live longer"...

Another thing to "dig" is her relationship with her dad. How close are both of them? Do they share alot of things with each other etc.
It may help you a bit to wiggle your way through if things get messy


Hahahaha..bro...

She is still well and kicking...hahaha...well at kicking me most of the time and I love it...:D

Yes bro...as explained above...cannot work...he will remember....let me explain a little more in part 2...

Very true...act blur live longer...but MIA can live forever...;)


Cheers bro...

.

[Wizrd]

.

Alrighty folks...the latest update...


Late last night...I sent her a text to say that my Australian number's credit may be running out soon...
Then this morning...another friend called me from Australia and that number's credit really ran out...so for now...unless I contact her using my other numbers...she has basically lost contact with me...

So in effect...to her...I am now MIA...

I feel bad about this and do not know what else I can do right now...

The best thing is for me to play disappearance for the time being...let me sort it out in my own mind first.
Maybe if I find a solution...I will contact her when I am in Australia in a month's time...the next time...I'm going to be in Melbourne for 3 weeks....perhaps she can come visit...at least her family will not be involved then...
Maybe she won't even want to meet me then...which will bloody serve me right...:rolleyes:


My thought process is a bit messed up now so am not thinking clearly...giving myself the time to work this through...and with inputs from all the bros and sis in here...hopefully I will live to hook another day...:p


Alrighty...let me work on part 2 right now...should be ready in a couple of hours....


Cheers everyone...

.

[sane]

.

So in effect...to her...I am now MIA...

.

Bro, i understand that u don't want to commit but hor, u can really play without getting real feelings involved?

[Wizrd]

Bro, i understand that u don't want to commit but hor, u can really play without getting real feelings involved?


Hi Sane...always good to hear the sane voice...:)

There was no commitment with her...and yes, while I have broken quite a few of my own rules with her...I would not have chosen to do this to anyone...

This is really the 1 out of a billion type exception...if her parents are not who they are...then I would have kept her as a friend /lover for a lonnnggg time...
Had I known who her parents are before I started talking to her...we would not have been sexual...and I would love to meet my platoon mate again for a few drinks...and maybe be live-long friends again with him...

If no real feelings involved...then I wouldn't be at all streessed about the situation...right?? :p

For now...too much to forgive and forget....:( and this is not the way to re-introduce myself back into his life...

Thanks for reading and commenting...always a pleasure to hear from you...cheers...


.

[henabi]

Sigh... I guess this is one of those "The Hunter got hunted... Accidentally" type.

Probably that's the only thing you can do right now.. Let Time wash away some of the feelings, and maybe just maybe... in a few months time she finds another guy and you can re intro yourself in the correct way.

[sane]

Hi Sane...always good to hear the sane voice...

There was no commitment with her...and yes, while I have broken quite a few of my own rules with her...I would not have chosen to do this to anyone...

This is really the 1 out of a billion type exception...if her parents are not who they are...then I would have kept her as a friend /lover for a lonnnggg time...
Had I known who her parents are before I started talking to her...we would not have been sexual...and I would love to meet my platoon mate again for a few drinks...and maybe be live-long friends again with him...

If no real feelings involved...then I wouldn't be at all streessed about the situation...right?? :p

For now...too much to forgive and forget....:( and this is not the way to re-introduce myself back into his life...

Thanks for reading and commenting...always a pleasure to hear from you...cheers...

.

Nvr hear from you for a loooooong time and just get to learn that u were busy settling ur personal issues and grats for ur new found freedom :)

Sometimes the most impossible are always possible, it's really so unbelievable but it really happen!! Just keep things as it is will always be the best.

Continue writing, I luv reading your stories, always witty and full of humour :)

[Wizrd]

Sigh... I guess this is one of those "The Hunter got hunted... Accidentally" type.

Probably that's the only thing you can do right now.. Let Time wash away some of the feelings, and maybe just maybe... in a few months time she finds another guy and you can re intro yourself in the correct way.

Hahahaha bro....no...

This is one of those hunter walked into own trap type of accident...:rolleyes:

Yes...I agree...no choice is the best phrase I can think of...time will heal all wounds...including mine and hers...I hope...

But dang bro...if only I don't like her sooooo much...why must she be sooooo cute??(and sweet and pretty and warm and lovable and sexy and...) :mad:
:o


Cheers...

.

[Wizrd]

Nvr hear from you for a loooooong time and just get to learn that u were busy settling ur personal issues and grats for ur new found freedom

Sometimes the most impossible are always possible, it's really so unbelievable but it really happen!! Just keep things as it is will always be the best.

Continue writing, I luv reading your stories, always witty and full of humour


Oh....hahahaha...no Sane...

I was kept away because of a lack of internet and I lost my password after that...

My personal issues have long been settled...well...this is the type of self-inflicted personal issues I have nowadays...:( :p

Anywyas...glad you like reading my writing...and boy are you in for a treat...

I am finding it difficult to write part 2 in a short and succinct version...so may have to deliver it in a few parts....I hope you and the other readers don't mind...;)


Cheers and please keep reading and commenting...


.

[sane]

Oh....hahahaha...no Sane...

I was kept away because of a lack of internet and I lost my password after that...

My personal issues have long been settled...well...this is the type of self-inflicted personal issues I have nowadays...:( :p

Anywyas...glad you like reading my writing...and boy are you in for a treat...

I am finding it difficult to write part 2 in a short and succinct version...so may have to deliver it in a few parts....I hope you and the other readers don't mind...;)


Cheers and please keep reading and commenting...


.

Anyway glad that u r back and to share of more :)

Take your time to write, good stories gotta wait..

Looking forward for new updates!

[Wizrd]

Anyway glad that u r back and to share of more :)

Take your time to write, good stories gotta wait..

Looking forward for new updates!


Right-i-ho....here it comes...:p


.

[Wizrd]

.

Alrighty readers...as stated earlier...part 2 cannot be squeezed into a short version...so...

Here is part 2A...enjoy...:D



*********


As I watch the cigarette smoke rise in front of me...my thoughts are brought back to the good old days...

Isn’t it strange how at that time, we bitch and moan and curse our circumstances...how much we hated what we were going through and how unfair we felt life was treating us at the time...but once it is in memory mode...it is always the good old days??


We were in platoon 8...the mixed bag platoon...some high flyers and some O level drop outs....some speak with a kantang stuck in the mouth and some hokkien peng...


My buddy and I were both educated abroad...and while he is the quiet type...I was mr. Gung ho...and even though our thinking were similar...and we had each other’s back...we do not always see eye to eye about things...


I felt that to survive the course...we must band together...he felt that we all had our own destiny..and that some will go on to become officers and some will be stuck as privates...no real point to merge everyone...I did not agree...


Anyway...my efforts to band the group together met with more resistance than I originally thought...herding dissimilar people together takes more than just talking...when people disagreed...logic often fails to bridge the gap...


There was this Chinese educated guy in the platoon...he was quiet but somehow all the hokkien peng kinda respected and followed...and then there was me...the loud mouth kantang guy who can intimidate all the higher educated guys into following...and so it became...after 2-3 weeks...two gangs in one big bunk...


This quiet guy...let’s call him Chong...seem to be an ok guy...he was honourable...did the right things and even I had to say I respected him...a bit...but it grated on my nerves that he always looked out for only the hokkien pengs...nevertheless...overall, he is a good guy...and we tolerated each other...


In my mind...the best way to forge platoon unity or to get a mixed group like ours to band together...nothing will help better than to throw a few parties together...


Whether rich or poor, educated or not, speaking Russian or Singlish...put a few cute girls into the mix and the guys will suddenly have a common topic and goal...all the guys become brothers in front of women...


I got one of the Kantang guys to be the GSO...he was the stud of his JC and no doubt he has a black book larger than the yellow pages...and so it was decreed...a party for the weekend...I went around the bunk and got 90% of the guys excited and looking forward to the party...


As usual...Chong had other ideas... and he went around convincing all the hokkien pengs to decline the invitation...and soon...only 40% of the guys are going to this party...


Naturally...I wanted to confront Chong...I mean what the fuck man...not say asking you to pay for everyone...each person only come out a few dollars...why block here block there??


My buddy told me to leave it alone but would Mr. Hot head listen?? No...



(to be continued...)


.

[henabi]

Seems like an exciting story coming...
*with my backpack filled with camping equipment, I walked over to where Wiz is, dropped my backpack onto the dried, cracked ground and began pitching my tent...*

[Wizrd]

Seems like an exciting story coming...
*with my backpack filled with camping equipment, I walked over to where Wiz is, dropped my backpack onto the dried, cracked ground and began pitching my tent...*

:D
Thanks bro...

2 episodes today...:cool:

.

[Wizrd]

.

(Cont...)


I cornered Chong one evening after night snack to ask him why he was being difficult...


My hokkien was at primary one level...the same level his English was at...and even at the best of times, we found it hard to communicate properly...but with some shouting and raise voices...we had no idea what we were saying to each other...


Of course...Mandarin was the medium of choice...but neither of us wanted to ‘back down’ to ‘lower’ ourselves to make the other person understand us better...


Very soon...raised voices became shouting...shouting turned to pushing...and pushing turned to shoving... I do not remember who threw the first punch...but I think it was all the ‘helpers’ around us that induced it...my buddy and some other Kantang gang members tried to hold me back and push Chong away...some of the Hokkien peng gang members tried to hold Chong back and push me away...someone must have hit someone in the face...and the next thing I knew...Chong and I were traded punches.


It was over pretty quickly...maybe 40 seconds...and I am not proud to say...I won simply because I was more aggressive...if the Kantang gang wasn’t there to hold me back...I believe I would have seriously hurt Chong....I think my buddy took a couple of punches from me for Chong even...


Oh great...with all the commotion...the sergeant and other NCOs arrived and the two lead culprits were rounded up and brought in front of the P.C...I had nothing to say to him and surprisingly, Chong kept quiet too...I thought he would bury me since he had the scars to show for it...

The P.C made us stay in the office for the night...a tiny room with a table and a chair only...and the table was full of files and crap...we were suppose to sleep there...what the fuck is the guy on??


Anyway...no choice...being the alpha male...I took the chair...Chong lan lan sat on the floor...


Once I had time to calm down...I thought through the fight...and the more I thought about what happened...the more I realised it is just a miscommunication...I felt bad for hurting him...and despite this incident...I have always liked Chong and respected him...


I walked over to him...offered him my hand and said I was sorry in Mandarin...


He looked at me for quite a long time...then he shook my hand...


I sat down beside him on the floor...’Why don’t you want to come to the party?’ I asked in Mandarin...


His reason actually made sense to me...damn the guy...


His logic is this...everyone will pay equal amount...yes??....but the girls will all be JC girls and most likely going to University...yes??...then the non-English speaking guys will have almost no chance to tackle them right??


Hmmmm okkkk....I never looked at it from that point of view...so??


So...it is unfair because the non-English speakers are only there to pay for the English speakers to have a good time....


Ok...he has a point...


I offered him some logic...like every guy has a chance with any girl and so on...and we bantered logic for an hour or so...



(to be continued...)


.

[papereleven]

Sometimes, the most sensible things only come out from a person that isn't highly educated.

Great story/recount. Do keep up the good work.

[Wizrd]

Sometimes, the most sensible things only come out from a person that isn't highly educated.

Great story/recount. Do keep up the good work.

Thanks bro...

And absolutely agree...common sense gets worn down with additional education...


Cheers...

.

[Wizrd]

Alrighty everyone...I'm flying off tomorrow and may be busy for 24 hours or so...so here is instalment 3...and more to follow tomorrow night and the day after ok?

BTW...to her, I have been MIA for a while now...I hope she is all right....though I have no way of finding out...:(

See you guys soon...cheers...


.

(Cont)


Sitting on the floor is not something I enjoyed...so after a while...I asked for his help and we cleared the table...put all the files and crap on the floor...pulled the table towards a wall...and we could both lie down on the table with our legs resting on the back of the chair and against a window ledge....now this was much more comfortable...brought back a few files to act as pillows and we were all set...


We continued talking...and I was impressed with his world views...his ideologies and his beliefs...we traded ideas and view points...and sleep was never an issue...


He told me that he is amazed at my way of thinking too...like he would never in a hundred years dared to move the things off the table and re-arrange the room...but that I found it easy to do was strange and new to him...he has seen me modify orders given and still made it work...he has been fascinated with my methods while not really condoning them...


There was basically too much man love and mutual praising that night...but we eventually got back to the party coming up...we finally came to a satisfactory solution...one of his hokkien peng GSO can round up their kind of women and we will have the best of both worlds...maybe many bros will breach the divide and cross pollinate each other’s flowers... heh heh heh...and the party was back on...


Chong and I became good friends from that day and now with the two gang leaders working together...the platoon became a unified force to be reckoned with...We won every competition within the company and the rest of the ITD during our time there...


Chong would always consult me about thinking out of the box and new ways to doing things...especially administrative things with lots of English writing...and I will always ask him about people management...for the life of me, I cannot grasp how effectively hokkien pengs can work together...no need written decrees, or expressed orders....they just banded together and did what needed to be done...we spent a lot of time learning from each other....and the most important I think I did for Chong...was to ‘force’ him to improve his English...


It is not about pride...I told him...it is simple economics...the more we can communicate with the outside world...the better lives we will have and the easier it will be to do business....any business...he and I can already speak mandarin...some of the dialects...a bit of Malay...he needed English...I needed hokkien...and we both needed Japanese...(this was the 80s ok?!?!)


And so...we enrolled into a Japanese class together...he taught me hokkien and I taught him English...and eventually...I got him to enrol into an English class as well...


Mind you...by this time, we were out of ITD and were both busy with camp duties...he went on to be a lance corporal in an infantry unit and I was a corporal in a guard unit...we met every weekend for classes and to cheong together...I brought him into some of the Kantang parties and he brought me into the heartland parties...


My buddy, who was with me at the guard unit, was eying all this and sounded his apprehensions...was I really trying to put false hope into a guy with unsuitable education...the disappointment that will come later may crush him if he doesn’t get anywhere after life in NS...I kept at it and disregarded my buddy’s warnings...and soon...he dropped out of our circle...preferring to hang out with only the Kantang crowd...


2 months into our Japanese class...a seriously cute girl joined the lessons...let’s call her Ching...sweet and kawaii...no horse run type...and all the guys in the class were bioing her non-stop...


(to be continued...)


.

[Tazzymercs]

so chong is the buddy whom you fucked the daughter or another buddy?

[twinresist2]

Let me make a guess.. Chong is the father and Ching is the mum .. OMG

[oshkosh]

On the way bro...still thinking how to phrase the story...



Not so easy bro...

She might feel the need to tell her parents...then I'm not sure what will happen...:(





Thanks for the upzz bro...

But why is everyone using the M word?. I've only been with her less than 10 days...:confused:
We are not even at the stage of gf/bf yet...but yeah...I guess it would be funny right?..

Yes...you are correct bro...I did bail on the meeting...only thing I can think of at the time...


.

Lol, u may never know how things work out but there is a 0.01% chance that you will get to use the M word. haha.

yea, if i am u i will also bail. how to face my friend and tell him: " bro, 20 years no see how are you!? btw, i up ur daughter le... zzzz."

Anyway, just see how it goes lor.

cheers!

[Wizrd]

so chong is the buddy whom you fucked the daughter or another buddy?

Let me make a guess.. Chong is the father and Ching is the mum .. OMG


HAHAHAHAHA.....bros...:D

Na bei...you all thought what....selling tikum tikum here ah??

KNN...read book sure first flip to the end one...the two of you....hahahaha...

Be patient lah...more story coming tomorrow...let it unwrap....ok??


Cheers for reading bros...:)


.

[Wizrd]

Lol, u may never know how things work out but there is a 0.01% chance that you will get to use the M word. haha.

yea, if i am u i will also bail. how to face my friend and tell him: " bro, 20 years no see how are you!? btw, i up ur daughter le... zzzz."

Anyway, just see how it goes lor.

cheers!


Yes bro....

Very true....I cannot argue with that...always a chance for the M word to crop up...:)


Yup...I also know no face to see him...so I run road...:(

Not very gentlemanly...but under lose lose situation...lose less better than all lost...


Cheers bro...


.

[curiouslala]

The first thing that came up in my mind is karma..
Well, i hv no right to tell you whether its right or wrong since you've lived longer than me..
But i do think that you're playing with women's heart..
Bcos if I'm in one of your women's position, I'll be very sad to know that's u hv lots of women to keep your bed warm..

Well, enough for my-so-called-womanly POV..

There are few of solution actually, but the easiest is to be MIA and not in contact with her anymore.. Why?
Because if she liked you that much, she probably won't be able to move on in 3 months..
And, if you meet her again, she'll grow stronger feeling for you..
And then i think you should prepared for makan-makan and reunion plus additional drama..

Several girl can be quite scary when chasing for the guy that they like (or love)..
Say, she went to malay and can't find u then her father told her to go n meet her uncle (u) in sg..
Then.. Lalala~~

Maybe it's just me, but I won't bring a guy whom i fuck or just a friend to meet my parents..
And if my guess is right, she already like u quite a lot in 6 days when u with her..
That's why she want to arrange meeting between you and her parents to know how would they think about you (since you're more senior than her previous guys)..

Because i think its every father's worst nightmare if their little girl is being played by a guy..
Some more this guy is his buddy and he have lots of gfs all around the world..

And if you're in your buddy position, i think you'll know what would you do if u knew that your buddy fucking and playing around with your daughter (or sister)..
That's what likely would happen to you..

So, just move on, and find another girl to keep..
And i hope that your friend won't migrate back to sg as the small sg would be tiny for u..
:D

[yatachi]

Cant comment much as u "eat salt more then i eat rice"
However my thought was that going MIA would be really unfair to a lady. But being in this situation it might be the best choices.

[Wizrd]

The first thing that came up in my mind is karma..
Well, i hv no right to tell you whether its right or wrong since you've lived longer than me..
But i do think that you're playing with women's heart..
Bcos if I'm in one of your women's position, I'll be very sad to know that's u hv lots of women to keep your bed warm..

Well, enough for my-so-called-womanly POV..

There are few of solution actually, but the easiest is to be MIA and not in contact with her anymore.. Why?
Because if she liked you that much, she probably won't be able to move on in 3 months..
And, if you meet her again, she'll grow stronger feeling for you..
And then i think you should prepared for makan-makan and reunion plus additional drama..

Several girl can be quite scary when chasing for the guy that they like (or love)..
Say, she went to malay and can't find u then her father told her to go n meet her uncle (u) in sg..
Then.. Lalala~~

Maybe it's just me, but I won't bring a guy whom i fuck or just a friend to meet my parents..
And if my guess is right, she already like u quite a lot in 6 days when u with her..
That's why she want to arrange meeting between you and her parents to know how would they think about you (since you're more senior than her previous guys)..

Because i think its every father's worst nightmare if their little girl is being played by a guy..
Some more this guy is his buddy and he have lots of gfs all around the world..

And if you're in your buddy position, i think you'll know what would you do if u knew that your buddy fucking and playing around with your daughter (or sister)..
That's what likely would happen to you..

So, just move on, and find another girl to keep..
And i hope that your friend won't migrate back to sg as the small sg would be tiny for u..
:D


Yes sis...good scolding...I accept...

But...

Maybe it's my thinking...but I really do not think I am playing with their feelings...

As one of the bros mentioned...yes...while I do not promise any of them anything...there is also no exclusion clause....meaning anyone of them could be the right one for me....

All the time I am with them...I focus entirely on them...and give them my all...

I try to make them happy...try to show them a good time...get to know them...let them get to know me...and at no time will I promise them a future or even hint at one...it is more like a 'holiday romance' type concept...they have fun, I have fun...and then we see if we choose to continue...

It seldom happens, but occasionally, a woman will ask me if I have other girlfriends...and I will tell them yes...they can then decide what they want to do...

Obviously, I am not going to volunteer the information...

Wouldn't a woman rather have a fun time with someone she likes than to just sit at home by herself??

Perhaps men think differently...but I know I sure prefer a woman I don't dislike...come around to take me out to eat and show me a good time...sex or no sex...and enjoy her company...instead of sitting in my room alone...

Alrighty...we can debate this point another time if you wish to discuss it further...

Yes and yes...I agree.....hahaha...makan makan some more...MIA is the only way I can think of...hurt her in the short run...spare her in the long run...

I reserve judgement on whether she wanted me to meet her parents because of her emotional state for me...possible, but I doubt it...

Hahaha...she won't come looking for me...I think I know her enough to say that...and her father will not send her to Sg...

Oh...if they migrate back to Sg...that is fine with me...I do not live in Sg sis...:D

Yes...very enlightening post sis...thank you very much and I will take your points on board...

Please tell me, if you can spare the time...what is this obssession that women have about owning the man 100% when they don't actually want 100% of the man??

Cheers again sis...talk again soon...


P/S...just read your siggy...interesting...care to discuss??
.

[Wizrd]

Cant comment much as u "eat salt more then i eat rice"
However my thought was that going MIA would be really unfair to a lady. But being in this situation it might be the best choices.


Thanks bro...

Please don't say that...good ideas are not the domain of people who have lived longer...

And yes...I agree with you...MIA is bad, no, seriously fucked up...but it is the best choice I have at the moment...

Cheers...

.

[nuclearkid]

Love your writing style, bro. Got me hooked every word of the way. ;)

I suppose Chong's is the dad of lady in question. Reading through your reenactment, you both have immense mutual respect for each other, which would not be that bad should two old fogeys reunite. In my mind, you could show hand with her and remind her about that uncle who carried her 20 years ago and then a little about what her dad and you have gone through. It may cause her enough discomfort not to want you to meet her folks but at least the ball is squarely on her side.

Once this is in the open, there's a clean conscience if you or her wants to continue playing. Seriously, I don't think its such a big deal under the circumstances. Breaking the news to her is probably the toughest part... But if you think that there's more than a miniscule chance she wants more than what you can commit, then you should be gentle and exit the gentlemanly way. Whichever, please do continue your story. :D

[sane]

The first thing that came up in my mind is karma..
Well, i hv no right to tell you whether its right or wrong since you've lived longer than me..
But i do think that you're playing with women's heart..
Bcos if I'm in one of your women's position, I'll be very sad to know that's u hv lots of women to keep your bed warm..

Well, enough for my-so-called-womanly POV..

There are few of solution actually, but the easiest is to be MIA and not in contact with her anymore.. Why?
Because if she liked you that much, she probably won't be able to move on in 3 months..
D

Hi sis,
If u read more about bro Wizrd, u will know where he is coming from. He is someone who just walk out from a marriage and won't commit.

He is upfront to the ladies and don't promise them anything just to get them in bed. Sex is based on mutual agreement. For this, I salute him.

I guess the key to avoid being hurt is to be direct and straight forward.

I made it very clear from day 1 to those who know me that I don't go for flings/ons/fbs and when i went out with my guy friends, I paid for my own share or we take turns to pay, won't sponge on anyone too. That friendship line is drawn very clearly :)

Even if bro is my personal friend, I will made this known for him too.

For this case, it's really unexpected n for the best for both of them, stop all contact for the hurt to be minimal.

Even if it seem to v cruel, this is actually the best for the other party, release her n let her move on, just leave the beautiful memories behind.

[curiouslala]

Yes sis...good scolding...I accept...

But...

Maybe it's my thinking...but I really do not think I am playing with their feelings...

As one of the bros mentioned...yes...while I do not promise any of them anything...there is also no exclusion clause....meaning anyone of them could be the right one for me....

All the time I am with them...I focus entirely on them...and give them my all...

I try to make them happy...try to show them a good time...get to know them...let them get to know me...and at no time will I promise them a future or even hint at one...it is more like a 'holiday romance' type concept...they have fun, I have fun...and then we see if we choose to continue...

It seldom happens, but occasionally, a woman will ask me if I have other girlfriends...and I will tell them yes...they can then decide what they want to do...

Obviously, I am not going to volunteer the information...

Wouldn't a woman rather have a fun time with someone she likes than to just sit at home by herself??

Perhaps men think differently...but I know I sure prefer a woman I don't dislike...come around to take me out to eat and show me a good time...sex or no sex...and enjoy her company...instead of sitting in my room alone...

Alrighty...we can debate this point another time if you wish to discuss it further...

Yes and yes...I agree.....hahaha...makan makan some more...MIA is the only way I can think of...hurt her in the short run...spare her in the long run...

I reserve judgement on whether she wanted me to meet her parents because of her emotional state for me...possible, but I doubt it...

Hahaha...she won't come looking for me...I think I know her enough to say that...and her father will not send her to Sg...

Oh...if they migrate back to Sg...that is fine with me...I do not live in Sg sis...:D

Yes...very enlightening post sis...thank you very much and I will take your points on board...

Please tell me, if you can spare the time...what is this obssession that women have about owning the man 100% when they don't actually want 100% of the man??

Cheers again sis...talk again soon...


P/S...just read your siggy...interesting...care to discuss??
.
Lol.. No need to discuss about my siggy la.. That one, case close liao..

But anyway, I've to say sorry bcos i said that you playing with girl's heart.
Bcos if when she asked u whether you have other gfs or not n u answer it with Yes..
Then I must say that you're not playing with their heart n it's more like u fall into your own game (not karma)

And yeah, like sis sane said below, that's called mutual benefits la..
Bcos if I happen to be in one of ur gfs place, I'd be happy if you told me the real fact that you are having other gfs except me and it'll give me chance to think whether I want to continue screwing u or not..

In my own case, I also did asked him about that few times and he dun wan be honest..
Even after I told him that's its okay if he have gf..
Then tada.. Her gf or maybe i should say a fiance, came out into the picture
And it's was not good la..
If he's being honest with me, maybe we're now in thailand and having a LOT of fun tgt..

About the owning, let me think on how to rephrase it in English..
Paiseh.. My mother tongue isn't English..

:D

Hi sis,
If u read more about bro Wizrd, u will know where he is coming from. He is someone who just walk out from a marriage and won't commit.

He is upfront to the ladies and don't promise them anything just to get them in bed. Sex is based on mutual agreement. For this, I salute him.

I guess the key to avoid being hurt is to be direct and straight forward.

I made it very clear from day 1 to those who know me that I don't go for flings/ons/fbs and when i went out with my guy friends, I paid for my own share or we take turns to pay, won't sponge on anyone too. That friendship line is drawn very clearly :)

Even if bro is my personal friend, I will made this known for him too.

For this case, it's really unexpected n for the best for both of them, stop all contact for the hurt to be minimal.

Even if it seem to v cruel, this is actually the best for the other party, release her n let her move on, just leave the beautiful memories behind.
Paiseh ah sis..
I've been MIA for few weeks and the last thing that i read from bro Wizrd is when he shared his tips n tricks on how to have fun with local delights w/o hv to pay or tabao (correct me if I'm wrong)..
And i really dunno if he would answer those girls honestly if they ask about his other gfs...
Hehe.. Paiseh ahhh..

:D

[sean69]

Hi sis,
If u read more about bro Wizrd, u will know where he is coming from. He is someone who just walk out from a marriage and won't commit.

He is upfront to the ladies and don't promise them anything just to get them in bed. Sex is based on mutual agreement. For this, I salute him.

I guess the key to avoid being hurt is to be direct and straight forward.

...

For this case, it's really unexpected n for the best for both of them, stop all contact for the hurt to be minimal.

Even if it seem to v cruel, this is actually the best for the other party, release her n let her move on, just leave the beautiful memories behind.

For this case, at least for TS, he knows why he is stopping contacts .. but what about the lady ?

Is it more cruel to leave her wondering what happen or would it be able to tell her the truth and let her decide?

no right or wrong answer, just wondering...

[Wizrd]

Love your writing style, bro. Got me hooked every word of the way.

Thanks bro...very kind of you to say...:)



It may cause her enough discomfort not to want you to meet her folks but at least the ball is squarely on her side.

Yeah bro...methinks it may cause her enough discomfort to kick me in the nuts too...:o


. Whichever, please do continue your story.

Sure thing bro...coming right up after replying a few more posts...

Cheers...

.

[Wizrd]

Hi sis,
If u read more about bro Wizrd, u will know where he is coming from. He is someone who just walk out from a marriage and won't commit.

He is upfront to the ladies and don't promise them anything just to get them in bed. Sex is based on mutual agreement. For this, I salute him.

I guess the key to avoid being hurt is to be direct and straight forward.

I made it very clear from day 1 to those who know me that I don't go for flings/ons/fbs and when i went out with my guy friends, I paid for my own share or we take turns to pay, won't sponge on anyone too. That friendship line is drawn very clearly :)

Even if bro is my personal friend, I will made this known for him too.

For this case, it's really unexpected n for the best for both of them, stop all contact for the hurt to be minimal.

Even if it seem to v cruel, this is actually the best for the other party, release her n let her move on, just leave the beautiful memories behind.


Thank Sane...you're the best...:)

Very true...draw the line so each person is aware of the boundary...and the 'price' for crossing over...then each and both can decide which side to cross over to...
Well said!

And agree too...I'm MIA to her now and probably will not contact her again. Surprisingly...my heart hurts pretty badly on this one...both for having to do this...and having done that...one of life's real cruel curve balls...

Cheers sis...please keep reading and commenting...


.

[Tazzymercs]

Thank Sane...you're the best...:)

And agree too...I'm MIA to her now and probably will not contact her again. Surprisingly...my heart hurts pretty badly on this one...both for having to do this...and having done that...one of life's real cruel curve balls...

.

Bro there is a difference in 不舍得 and feeling wasted leh lol...is you feel 不舍得 or that its just a wasted effort leh...

[Wizrd]

Lol.. No need to discuss about my siggy la.. That one, case close liao..

Hey sis...

I picked up on your siggy not because I'm nosey....was just going to point out to you your state of mind when writing that...kinda in answer to your accusation from before...

Glad you said what you said below though...and we seem to agree on the fundamental fact that both men and women enjoy fun...and dare I say, sex...it is then only a matter of how we get it, right? :)




But anyway, I've to say sorry bcos i said that you playing with girl's heart.
Bcos if when she asked u whether you have other gfs or not n u answer it with Yes..
Then I must say that you're not playing with their heart n it's more like u fall into your own game (not karma)


Please sis...no need to apologise...it was only a matter of perspective...



And yeah, like sis sane said below, that's called mutual benefits la..
Bcos if I happen to be in one of ur gfs place, I'd be happy if you told me the real fact that you are having other gfs except me and it'll give me chance to think whether I want to continue screwing u or not..

Hahaha....that's sounds...errrmmm...yeah...:D

I understand what you mean sis...glad you can accept my method...




In my own case, I also did asked him about that few times and he dun wan be honest..
Even after I told him that's its okay if he have gf..
Then tada.. Her gf or maybe i should say a fiance, came out into the picture
And it's was not good la..
If he's being honest with me, maybe we're now in thailand and having a LOT of fun tgt..

I'm sorry to hear that sis...

Sadly, some guys like to employ the fog of war as their only tactics.

I suppose it's insecurity or not wanting to miss out for being honest...

But being a guy...I can see where they are coming from...and can only say 'all is fair in love and battle'...guys must do what they have to do...right or wrong, moral or not...and the ladies have to find ways verify and check merchandise before accepting....something like buyer beware....

It is a dance of sorts after all, and kinda unfair to only blame one side. One team primarily does the offence and one team primarily does the defence...and hopefully the dance is a joyous one for both parties...

The toughest dance is when one side wants to be upfront, but the other side thinks it's a trick... Neither side can win those...



About the owning, let me think on how to rephrase it in English..
Paiseh.. My mother tongue isn't English..

Hahaha...English is not my mother tongue either...no worries, please take all the time you need...

While you're thinking...can you please add this question to the production line...

When sex is involved, everyone seem to think or believe that the man gained while the woman lost. Be it reputation, morality, value...did the woman really lose something for having sex with a man?



I've been MIA for few weeks and the last thing that i read from bro Wizrd is when he shared his tips n tricks on how to have fun with local delights w/o hv to pay or tabao (correct me if I'm wrong)..
And i really dunno if he would answer those girls honestly if they ask about his other gfs...

Hahaha...sis...

Those tips are like a guide to speed dating...

I share tips on how to bring the horse to the water's edge...and ways to 'assist' the horse to want to willingly drink...but ultimately...it is still up to the horse to drink...this cannot and should never be forced...

If you have read through what I have shared...I gave plenty of examples of failures...and even suggested times to walk away...

It is by no means a sure-win formula...merely to help improve the chance only...and hopefully broken down into understandable and digestible chunks...

Just so you know sis...in another adult site...I 'share' similar tips to help women to attract guys and ways to improve their chances of being asked out...this dating game is tough...and we all need all the help we can get...both men and women...but I just dislike playing emotional games...people should be more upfront with their intentions...although I won't ever win that one...


Cheers sis...love hearing from you...:)


.

[Wizrd]

For this case, at least for TS, he knows why he is stopping contacts .. but what about the lady ?

Is it more cruel to leave her wondering what happen or would it be able to tell her the truth and let her decide?

no right or wrong answer, just wondering...


Yes bro...sadly, in this case, I cannot do both...telling her the truth will invite ten thousand unanswerable questions plus whatever she decides, I will still have to say no.

Therefore...the best solution I can come up with is to leave her wondering and know that she is strong enough to move on soon...

Cheers bro...


.

[Wizrd]

Bro there is a difference in 不舍得 and feeling wasted leh lol...is you feel 不舍得 or that its just a wasted effort leh...


Yes bro...I understand what you are saying...maybe you will understand me better after reading the rest of my story...my heart pain stems from wishing I didn't start the thing at all...

I initially thought I can highlight just the facts...but realise I cannot make sense of the complexity with telling almost the full story...

Please read on...:)

Cheers bro...


.

[Wizrd]

.

(Cont)


Being Mr. Gung ho...I die die must try my luck...and soon...I warmed her up enough to go for a date with me...of course...the rest of the class had no idea...including Chong...


Ching and I agreed that our relationship should be kept a secret or she will never hear the end of it in class and that was fine by me...I told her also that I was planning to study overseas after my NS, so we should keep our relationship light...no heavy stuff that may cause us to regret when the time came for me to leave...within a month...she and I were meeting secretly to do the horizontal tango...


After a couple of weeks of getting together with Ching, I was introduced to her cousin; Chung. Chung was very cute too but different from Ching. She was the outgoing sporty type...always after some outdoor activities...always going in four different directions all at once...


One day when I was cuddling Ching, I suggested to her that we should hook Chong and Chung up together. She laughed at the idea because they were quite the opposite. He was the silent steady type and she cannot sit still for a minute plus speaks at 200 mile per hour. I laughed too. It'll be fun and who knows, opposite attracts right?


We spent a day or too to scheme it, and the most important thing was to keep Ching and my relationship quiet. This proved easy enough since Chung was the careless type who didn't even think we were together. She actually thought Ching and I were revising Japanese in her bedroom. So cute yet so blur....hahahaha...


It wasn't difficult to bring the two of them together....simply get Chung to come pick Ching up after class, Chong and I just happened to need a ride to Orchard...easy peasy....then at Orchard, Ching suddenly needed my help to pick out a thank you present (we told Chong it was for Chung and told Chung it was for Chong...hahaha) and we asked Chong to go jalan jalan with Chung to keep her company until we were done...meet back here in 3 hours ok? Cool...see ya...


To be fair, Chong was suspicious...very suspicious...3 hours to buy present?? But given a chance to be with a cute girl, he left it well enough alone. He did confront me the next day and i told him the scheme...we laughed real hard about it.


From all reports gathered, they got on well. She brought up his energy level while he gave her some calm...they were a nice couple...


Life was good and it got even better...after a while as a corporal...I was sent a notice that I was to report to OCS...to become an officer...wow...fantastic....


Chong and I celebrated...then at another time, Ching and I celebrated too...
I told the both of them that I had to drop out of Japanese because being back on course won’t give me the time to attend classes and do homework and all that...the OCS course was 6 months for me and that is a long time to try to juggle everything...


Naturally...Chong was unaware of what was going on between Ching and I...but he knew that she and I were friends...better friends than with other classmates...that was all he knew though...he did ask me if I have a girlfriend around that time period...but he bought my standard excuse of "who has the time bro?"


Chong and I would still meet when I had time on weekends...and Ching and I would meet whenever I can get away from everyone else I knew...things were stable for a few months...and I was having a great time...very tired all the time...but great...


Chong asked me one day about sex...when should he and Chung get into it? I was surprised that they hadn't done it yet,..knowing how daring and active she is. He said they never got around to it...they only kissed and from my understanding of what he said, not even the tongue kind of kissing...maybe slightly hotter than a good night kiss...max extent of wet lips and slight open mouths...no tongue and holding hands with each other so no auto roam...and lasting only like a few seconds at a time.... It was the 80s man but my best friend of the day was gunning for the 1880s...However, I wasn't overly concerned for him though. Knowing him, he'd come up with 'don't ruin the girl's future' type of old school Chinese drama crap. I knew Chung will rape him when she is good and ready...oh..note to self...remind her to give him an ang pao...


If you guys know about NS days...you will understand that with the limited time outside of camp...there was very little time for quality time with outside friends...between new course mates, Chong and my old kantang mates...and Ching...and family...juggling becomes too tiring some times...every sector got less time in my schedule.....


Nevertheless, Chong was still one of the main stay during my weekends...his parents' home was near a hawker centre...and whenever I went over to visit...his mother would always cook soup and desserts for me...his sister...21 years old that year...seem to have taken a shine to me too and always bought cakes and kueh keuh every Sunday...according to Chong...she never asked if I was going over...but always bought the stuff...and no one was allowed to touch them until evening time after I didn’t show up...it was heart warming...and I knew nothing about not stringing a woman along then...I mean, I was getting kueh kueh right??...bring it on...the more the merrier...her heart is her problem...sorry but every man (and woman) look out for his/her own internal organs ok?
:D


(to be continued...)

.

[Steventan]

TS Wizrd,
Thanks for a well written thread & sharing what you went through ...
:) :)

[sane]

In my own case, I also did asked him about that few times and he dun wan be honest..
Even after I told him that's its okay if he have gf..
Then tada.. Her gf or maybe i should say a fiance, came out into the picture
And it's was not good la..
If he's being honest with me, maybe we're now in thailand and having a LOT of fun tgt..

Paiseh ah sis..
I've been MIA for few weeks and the last thing that i read from bro Wizrd is when he shared his tips n tricks on how to have fun with local delights w/o hv to pay or tabao (correct me if I'm wrong)..
And i really dunno if he would answer those girls honestly if they ask about his other gfs...
Hehe.. Paiseh ahhh..

D

Sis, if u r into serious r/s, put the intimacy on hold and take time to know the other party and like what u've say, he will bring u home if he is into u.

However if its only out for fun, don't need to think so much. Play with mutual agreement, 好来好散，再见还是朋友。

For this case, at least for TS, he knows why he is stopping contacts .. but what about the lady ?

Is it more cruel to leave her wondering what happen or would it be able to tell her the truth and let her decide?

no right or wrong answer, just wondering...

Personally I find it more cruel to let her to cling on false hope or tainted her sweet memories by letting her know that "I sleep with daddy's best friend" n hopefully not to remind her of it whenever she see daddy's face.

I don't know how conversative her family is but if it's mine, my whole family will probably freak out.

Thank Sane...you're the best...:)

Very true...draw the line so each person is aware of the boundary...and the 'price' for crossing over...then each and both can decide which side to cross over to...
Well said!

And agree too...I'm MIA to her now and probably will not contact her again. Surprisingly...my heart hurts pretty badly on this one...both for having to do this...and having done that...one of life's real cruel curve balls...

Cheers sis...please keep reading and commenting...

.

Tks for sharing bro. Without a proper closure and with the complications involved, no doubt this will set the heart aching. Time heal everything.

Do continue writing. :)

[Wizrd]

TS Wizrd,
Thanks for a well written thread & sharing what you went through ...
:) :)


No worries bro...thanks for reading and commenting...

Cheers...

.

[Wizrd]

Tks for sharing bro. Without a proper closure and with the complications involved, no doubt this will set the heart aching. Time heal everything.

Do continue writing. :)

Thanks Sane...:)

Yes, I hope the heart ache and regret will lessen over time quickly...

Cheers and more cumming right up...:D


.

[Wizrd]

.


(Cont)


We would hang out in his house...chit chat and talk about our plans for our future and anything under the sun...then go get a coffee or snack at the hawker centre...life was simple and good...his sister would sometimes join us...but most of the time felt left out by guys speak...or more technically accurate...our talking cock...yet, she bravely hung on and tagged along with us every so often...


I always excused myself around 6 pm to go meet Ching, and Chong’s mother had asked me many times to stay for dinner...always...no thanks Auntie...need to go home....and she would laugh and scold me...say I should always go home first and spend more time there...hahaha...I know that if I really did that...Auntie would have been disappointed...


Anyway...this lasted for the 6 months of OCS...and when I was posted back to be a P.C in Guards...things got even more busy...I had to cut the time spent at Chong’s house...and went over only once every two weeks...Ching and I were still keeping things light but I can tell she was getting restless...I knew she wanted more...a proper gf/bf thingy...even though we did all the bf/gf things...shopping, movies, meals, play house etc...but she wanted a title, which I could not understand the importance of...I mean, say she's girlfriend or don't say she's girlfriend, she is still girlfriend mah, right? Why must be iron teeth about this? My OCS mate have met her and they think of her as my girlfriend, not enough meh?..I only knew that I wanted to attend university in England...and that was still my plan in about a year’s time...and in my warped sense of logic, I merely didn't want someone who has speaking right to ask me not to go, and thus give me a dilemma...


During this period, both Ching and Chong would tell me the going ons in the Japanese class and they have become good friends too...I guess because they shared a common friend in me plus the Chung factor...and we tried so hard not to mix the meetings that I never actually saw the two of them together for a long time...once in a while, I'd meet him and Chung together...the young love birds were still not making headway in the sex department, and even I was starting to get blue balls on his behalf...he wasn't fazed though...and patiently explained to me that this is how a good relationship should be...KNN...I almost choked on my satay....


One day...Ching and I had an argument...we both said things we regretted...but young lovers are prone to that kind of things...after a few hugs and kisses...all was forgiven and things were back to normal...however...the mind state has altered...and I suspect that it kept on modifying a little at a time after that...


Roughly 2 months after that big argument...Ching and I decided to break off the sexual relationship and just be friends...I wouldn’t be her boyfriend and she wanted more from a guy...fair enough... I was not that guy for her...only being her friend was not easy but since I had little time...I only met her once a month after that...to eat and catch up, nothing more...but we were like the best of friends and can share everything because of our history....


We were soon passing the 1.5 year mark of our NS...I had another ‘girlfriend’, Chong said Chung broke up with him but its ok, he almost have another girlfriend already anyway...I asked him to double date with us and he always said not yet....I pushed and questioned and got no answer as to why we cannot double date...he had join me and my new girl for supper but there was no sign of his so-called girlfriend...according to Ching, Chung found Chong to be too straight and boring...ok, so opposites didn't attract that much then...


I still visited his house...and the soup and cakes and keuhs were always good...Auntie was always very pleasant and made me felt at home...Chong’s sister even started to sew and iron my uniform and stuff for me...this was like a home to me...


One day...Chong pulled me out to the hawker centre before I had my soup...na bei...WTF man?? And he acted very secretive...which was very unlike him...we sat down to a cup of kopi each then he started with the twenty questions...


Hey...I know you have a girlfriend but you are not very serious with her right?


Yes??? Why??


Hey...how about my sister??


What about your sister??


You know she likes you right?


Yeah...I’m a very likeable person...so what??


No...not like that...she really likes you...


For fuck sake bro...what’s going on? Are you trying to fix me up with you sister??


He looked a bit embarrassed...but he pushed on...he told me that when his sister heard that I have a girlfriend...she cried all night...KNN...why girls so like that one??


He asked if I can see a chance to be with his sister...you know...make her happy...which will make him happy...and also make his mother happy...yeah yeah yeah....I get it...na bei...everybody happy mah, right?...except me...no one cares how I feel hor...


No ah...she will make you happy one....you don’t think my sister is good for you meh?


Ok folks...time out...this is a fucking loaded question...a guy and his sister...do not mess around there...he makes fun of her...no problems...he tekan her...no problems...he says she is good for nothing...no problems...anyone else try to do or say the same things about his sister...NNB...there will be hell to pay...and I already know this at that tender age...


(to be continued...)

.

[curiouslala]

Hey sis...

I picked up on your siggy not because I'm nosey....was just going to point out to you your state of mind when writing that...kinda in answer to your accusation from before...

I know you're not nosey la.. Haha..
Just that I dun really like to discuss it in public..
That passed, but I'm still on my move on phase..

Glad you said what you said below though...and we seem to agree on the fundamental fact that both men and women enjoy fun...and dare I say, sex...it is then only a matter of how we get it, right? :)
Yep.. I agreed though.. That's okay..

Please sis...no need to apologise...it was only a matter of perspective...
Well, still need la..

I understand what you mean sis...glad you can accept my method...

I'm sorry to hear that sis...

Sadly, some guys like to employ the fog of war as their only tactics.

I suppose it's insecurity or not wanting to miss out for being honest...

But being a guy...I can see where they are coming from...and can only say 'all is fair in love and battle'...guys must do what they have to do...right or wrong, moral or not...and the ladies have to find ways verify and check merchandise before accepting....something like buyer beware....

It is a dance of sorts after all, and kinda unfair to only blame one side. One team primarily does the offence and one team primarily does the defence...and hopefully the dance is a joyous one for both parties...

The toughest dance is when one side wants to be upfront, but the other side thinks it's a trick... Neither side can win those...
Well, i don't really know it for sure..
Just that I asked him, but he said n insisted that he's single..

Please tell me, if you can spare the time...what is this obssession that women have about owning the man 100% when they don't actually want 100% of the man??
About this, the answer should goes to insecurity and afraid to lose..
There's so many pretty woman outside. What if he like them more than me?
Some more if the guy have higher cheating risk..

While you're thinking...can you please add this question to the production line...

When sex is involved, everyone seem to think or believe that the man gained while the woman lost. Be it reputation, morality, value...did the woman really lose something for having sex with a man?
I ever read this phrase somewhere..
Its said that "Woman lose their brain (ability to think logically) after they have sex with their partner when Man gain their brain (ability to think straight) after had sex.."
It should be something like that la..
My memories isn' t very good..

Me, myself can blame chemistry for that.. Bcos oxytocin screw my mind..
But, I think its because i need thr loving when we're having sex..
That's makes me feel fuller as a human being..


Those tips are like a guide to speed dating...

I share tips on how to bring the horse to the water's edge...and ways to 'assist' the horse to want to willingly drink...but ultimately...it is still up to the horse to drink...this cannot and should never be forced...

If you have read through what I have shared...I gave plenty of examples of failures...and even suggested times to walk away...

It is by no means a sure-win formula...merely to help improve the chance only...and hopefully broken down into understandable and digestible chunks...

Just so you know sis...in another adult site...I 'share' similar tips to help women to attract guys and ways to improve their chances of being asked out...this dating game is tough...and we all need all the help we can get...both men and women...but I just dislike playing emotional games...people should be more upfront with their intentions...although I won't ever win that one...

I've read that.. And this answer below is purely based on perception..
I think your guide isn't a guide to speed dating.. But more like guide to get a woman to have sex with before the night is over.. Or in another word, how to get ONS..
As if you re-read what you post, the goal is having sex.. And not to get to know her properly first for some time (say like 3 days or a week before sex)..
Eg. After you get her in ur bed and you think she's not that good to keep, i think you'll fuck her until ur last day of your stay and discard her asap..
Bcos i think you won't want to know more if she said she dun want.. (like your case with that Australian gal who rejecting u and make you have to find another sleeping partner)..

:D

[curiouslala]

Sis, if u r into serious r/s, put the intimacy on hold and take time to know the other party and like what u've say, he will bring u home if he is into u.

However if its only out for fun, don't need to think so much. Play with mutual agreement, 好来好散，再见还是朋友.
Err.. I know la..
But, I wasn't mah.. And i also not asking to be in a relationship with the guy..
He asked and I liked him and the sex and i said yes to so called long distance relationship..
And around this period, I asked him few times about his rs status, he said no..
Then I liked him more, his gf aka fiance come lo..
Ka jiao everything..

Haha..

[TempLust]

Err.. I know la..
But, I wasn't mah.. And i also not asking to be in a relationship with the guy..
He asked and I liked him and the sex and i said yes to so called long distance relationship..
And around this period, I asked him few times about his rs status, he said no..
Then I liked him more, his gf aka fiance come lo..
Ka jiao everything..

Haha..

Let TS finish his story and then it's time for some opinions.....not judgement, thei I must emphasize.

I'm having some inkling, speculative guess but let's wait till the end.

TS, post more and reply less. You don't need to justify yourself. You did what you did. Your game, your rules and be it good or bad. Your life.

[Wizrd]

I know you're not nosey la.. Haha..
Just that I dun really like to discuss it in public..
That passed, but I'm still on my move on phase..


Ok sis...fair enough...best of luck with that...:)




About this, the answer should goes to insecurity and afraid to lose..
There's so many pretty woman outside. What if he like them more than me?
Some more if the guy have higher cheating risk..

Hmmmm...maybe true in the old days...but today...everyone has a high cheating chance....

With the levelling of the playing field so to speak...the only way to keep a partner is to make that person want to stay voluntarily...and is no longer just about singular aspects like good looks, good sex and so on...the total package matters more than just sexiness...


I ever read this phrase somewhere..
Its said that "Woman lose their brain (ability to think logically) after they have sex with their partner when Man gain their brain (ability to think straight) after had sex.."
It should be something like that la..
My memories isn' t very good..

Me, myself can blame chemistry for that.. Bcos oxytocin screw my mind..
But, I think its because i need thr loving when we're having sex..
That's makes me feel fuller as a human being..

Hahahaha....memory not good may be due to a lack of oxytocin...:D

Yes, it is the hormone that calms, reduces stress and induces bonding...but....

As long as both partners ares satisfied with a sexual encounter...my question was...why shoes everyone feel/think/comment that....the woman lost out...in Chinese...吃亏了...

This is a public opinion/belief that I don't get...surely women enjoy sex as much as, if not more than men...



I've read that.. And this answer below is purely based on perception..
I think your guide isn't a guide to speed dating.. But more like guide to get a woman to have sex with before the night is over.. Or in another word, how to get ONS..
As if you re-read what you post, the goal is having sex.. And not to get to know her properly first for some time (say like 3 days or a week before sex)..
Eg. After you get her in ur bed and you think she's not that good to keep, i think you'll fuck her until ur last day of your stay and discard her asap..
Bcos i think you won't want to know more if she said she dun want.. (like your case with that Australian gal who rejecting u and make you have to find another sleeping partner)..


Ok, fair enough as well. I can see why you come to that conclusion...

There is also an assumption that men will fuck just any willing woman...which is not true...

An important element is the qualifying process, which you will be surprised at how many guys have asked me about....and in my discussions with them...different standards and likes create different qualifying processes...
This mean...a lot of the women are 'spared'...

Yes sis...sex is the ultimate point for guys to hook a woman mah...so speed dating guide for guys must surely have this end goals as the objective.
Errrr...I agree that most people at the start of using my method MAY tend to sleep and forget as many women as possible...but once they know it works...most guys I know of will become a lot more selective...

From a woman's perspective...getting to know someone needs a fair amount of time...for men...this is not really necessary...especially to get to the sex part...AND...for most men...sex (good sex in the case of men with lots of option...multiple availability of sex for men with fewer option...and offer of sex for men with no other option) is also a selection requirement to decide if a woman is worth keeping...

I'm sorry sis...as I'm writing this...I realise it doesn't sound too good from the women's point of view...even some guys may not like what i just said...but it is true...and my method is not for everyone...

For me at least...the person may be the loveliest person in the world, the most pretty, the kindest...(blah blah blah...you get the idea...) ...if the sex between us is not compatible...using my words...I will throw her away...
(NB...I won't keep her till the end of my stay...one sexual encounter is not stringing a woman along in my mind...I would rather go hooking again the next day because what I am after in my method...is to find a woman I can revisit over and over again...)

From your point of the argument...I agree that in a way I have created a ONS situation..but the intention was never about that...as stated above...my aim is to find a 'partner'...to meet and to get to know...over a reasonably long period of time...

Ok sis...and please don't get me wrong...I do value and respect your views...and would love a chance and proper forum to discuss this with you in depth (because I am fascinated with a woman's perspective...)...but as bro Templust says...we are going off topic...my thinking about our exchange is this...
However gentle, guided with the best intentions, using the most painless /pleasurable methods possible...a fish will never agree with and condone a fisherman lowering his hook into the water...whether the fisherman plans to keep, take care of, eat or release the fish after catching her...

Thanks sis...you just inspired a slight tweak to applying my method...

Please keep commenting...great to hear your points...:)


.

[Wizrd]

Let TS finish his story and then it's time for some opinions.....not judgement, thei I must emphasize.

I'm having some inkling, speculative guess but let's wait till the end.

TS, post more and reply less. You don't need to justify yourself. You did what you did. Your game, your rules and be it good or bad. Your life.

Hahaha bro....my NS story has brought out the command essence in you...:D

Yes sir...but...the point of posting in a forum is to interact and get points of view...and to discuss those POV...no?

Alrighty...you are not wrong either...here comes the next instalment...


Cheers bro...

.

[Wizrd]

.

(Cont)


So I hummed and hawed for a while...cannot say yes...cannot say no...na bei...how to answer loaded questions like this??


At the end, I came up with a plan....ok bro...I tell you what...maybe...ok, maybe only hor...I take your sister out for a meal and a movie...see how we get along first ok? Maybe she will stop liking me or something...then we decide can or not?


Like a date?


Shiiiiit...my face aged at least a year from that question....No lah, not date lah...don’t gun the jump like that...we just spend some alone time together first then see ok??


He grinned from ear to ear...and my next date was fixed...haiz...


Since I didn’t really want to rush back to his house to meet his sister...we hung out longer at the hawker centre...We talked about other things...his camp...his English classes (which has improved his England powder to impressive levels...this Chong is hard working and is a genius...if only I can jam a kantang into his throat...he would sound like a radio DJ...)...and of course the Japanese class...


His eyes dimmed a bit on mentioning the Japanese class...


What’s wrong, I asked...but he didn’t say anything...maybe reminded him of Chung...I quickly changed the subject...


After a while...we went back to his house...his sister engaged me in conversation...mostly to find out if I had uniform to wash or iron or clean or sew or something (lucky for her I was still quite young and green then...otherwise, may have asked for a BJ...hahahahaha...could be worth a beating from Chong just for that...)...Chong went back into his room and took out his notebook...something he carried with him and I have never seen what’s inside...


This time...he showed it to me...he opened to a page where he penned some Chinese poems...love poems and such...it was quite good...a bit too sugary but good...and being quite the expert in poems, I read with interest...he wrote about 8-9 poems...not long...but all quite touching and meaningful...


Wah bro...I said to him...what’s up?? Love sick ah?? This for you girlfriend you told me about?


His face turned red...


Eventually...I got it out of him...he likes this girl but is afraid to ask her out...so he wrote poems...but then afraid to show her...she is not his girlfriend and may not even know he likes her...but he sometimes talk like she is his girlfriend...KNN...why guys so like that one??


I said to him...how do you expect the girl to know you like her?? You must try mah...the most she says no only...anyway...these poems can melt any girl’s heart...be brave...approach her and show her...then if she likes them, tell her they're written for her...if you need, I can help you write some in English too...


He ee ee aa aa all the way until about the time for me to leave...and then finally told me...he likes Ching...she has been kind and nice to him...although she never hinted that she likes him that way...but the more time he spent with her, the more he liked her...now...he can't stop thinking about her....


Hmmmm...I thought to myself...I can help here...she and I are no longer together in that way...put in a few good words...at least can get them on a few dates right?? He's a good guy...she's a good girl...not that difficult I think...they can be good together...


Ok bro...I told him...don’t worry...you polish up these poems...I will talk to Ching ...


Are you sure?? Hey brother, don’t sabo me hor...what if she stops talking to me altogether?


Don’t worry lah...wrap on my body...I hint hint and if she don’t like...I won’t push it further ok...then you can just act blur and say didn’t know why I said those crazy things...ok??


The poor guy must have had sperm swimming in his head by that stage...even if I told him to jump off the tallest building; he would have done it for love...so he happily agreed to my plan...


(to be continued...)


.

[Tazzymercs]

BRO!!! all the chung ching chung lol KNN i read halfway i kena confused liao lol

but you a bit CB in a sense hor...you never tell chong that you already up the girl ching liao lol....

later when they together hor then she blurt out...you BI BIN wan lo..no meh..sure got like KKNBCCG why you never tell me before...from what i see chong very traditional de right...sure he will mind de lo even if he never say lol..

somemore you his brother leh hahaha...not nice to kept in the dark ma...imagine that my gf kena up by my best buddy and i dunno...then when find out i very kao wei de lo...my best friend seen my gf naked..up her...and duno up how many times...where they up..knn lol 101 question..then got scar..then break liao...lol then i'll curse him like no tml de...

[Wizrd]

BRO!!! all the chung ching chung lol KNN i read halfway i kena confused liao lol

but you a bit CB in a sense hor...you never tell chong that you already up the girl ching liao lol....

later when they together hor then she blurt out...you BI BIN wan lo..no meh..sure got like KKNBCCG why you never tell me before...from what i see chong very traditional de right...sure he will mind de lo even if he never say lol..

somemore you his brother leh hahaha...not nice to kept in the dark ma...imagine that my gf kena up by my best buddy and i dunno...then when find out i very kao wei de lo...my best friend seen my gf naked..up her...and duno up how many times...where they up..knn lol 101 question..then got scar..then break liao...lol then i'll curse him like no tml de...


Hahahaha...bro...

Yeah lor...I was going to name his sister Cheng and my army buddy Chang...but that will confuse even me...so I kept it simple...:D

Yes...I agree with you...but think of the time line mah bro...who brings up ancient history like that one?...he says he likes her...not say I tell him cannot, I already fucked her...like that meh? How to say?

Some more I really think they can be good for each other...and can make each other happy...some more I already no longer in the picture...should be ok right? Then once we past that window of opportunity...at which point can we bring it up? Got confessional happy hour meh?

Fate bro...it's all bloody fated...:(


.

[Wizrd]

(Cont)


Long story made short...over the next few weeks, I went on a few dates with his sister...she is really very pleasant and nice to be with...she’s quite pretty too...but I cannot help feeling like she is my sister too...you know what I mean?? No real sexual spark...just very comfortable to be with her...never even had the urge to cop a feel or anything type...and slowly...she accepted me as her friend...and we could talk about anything...and some time later, I even helped her nab a boyfriend...but that’s another really funny story...


And during the same time, I convinced Ching to give Chong a chance...aiya, just go out on a few dates...you know he is a really nice guy...very stable and progressive...never fucks around...in fact...never fucked before...if you like, he is the perfect bf material...if don’t like...just step back to be friends lor...


Na bei...they went on a few dates...then the middle man got cut out of the loop after that...hahaha...that’s always a good sign...


This went on for a while...meantime, yours truly was going through girlfriends like it was going out of fashion...damn modern girls are getting too bloody smart and demanding...and then...3 months after he finished his NS (I still had a while to go for yaya papaya going to OCS...)...he announced to me that he and Ching are getting married...


I was never so happy for anyone ever....my best friends are getting married...his sister and I busied ourselves with arranging everything....by this time, he had found a decent job and his powder of England gave him an edge that complimented his diploma perfectly...most people with that diploma were Chinese educated so he really stood out....and the Ching Chong wedding was the event of the day for all of us...


Everything went swimmingly...they were happy...his sister was happy...his mother was happy...his father was happy, well, at least as happy when he was not drunk...I was kinda happy...changed a few girlfriends again...KNN...girls are not easy to nail down when there’s no offer of commitment on the table...I vowed to find a way to deal with this issue....^_^


Anyway...all went along well and issue-free for a few years...


I made two major life decision modifications during that time...


1) I did not go to England to further my studies...I joined the Air force instead because they came knocking and the offer sounded too interesting to pass up...the university will always be there right?


2) I met this girl and while I psychoed her to be with me with no commitment...she slowly psychoed me to marry her...took her a few years but she won at the end...the biggest sway that helped her was that I also want to invest in property and HDB can only be possible with marriage...I already own a condo unit but without a second property, cannot make money on where I was staying...when she pitched me the – let’s get married so that we can buy an HDB proposal...it sounded logically and financially correct...we were staying together already anyway...one more piece of paper wouldn’t add that much right? (fucking wrong! Wrong! WRONG!...that was a dickhead decision...only wish I thought that through...but then...at that time of my life...I did not have enough information to know how stupid that decision was....)


Chong and I still hung out...but obviously not as often as before...We each had our own lives and we were both busy...


Then came the fateful night...


Ching and Chong already have two children at this stage...one daughter and one son...they were trying for one more...They also moved into a nice condo...life was really good to them...I was the son's godfather so was practising my Marlon Brando impersonation to fit into the role properly...why everyone always laughed at me when I did that was beyond my comprehension...I mean seriously, who dared to laugh when Don Corleone said...I'm gonna make him an offer he won't refuse ok? I want you to leave it all to me...Dang, people were pissing in their pants when he said that...not laugh...


At that time, I was stuck with my subservient girlfriend but was enjoying life too...constantly flying at the speed of sound is always good for the ego....


We got together a few times every couple of months...and always had a feast...this night was BBQ night and we all sat around the pit at the foot of their condo...


(to be continued...)

.

[henabi]

>.< you already have a condo why not go for a second condo instead of HDB?!?!

[Wizrd]

>.< you already have a condo why not go for a second condo instead of HDB?!?!


:o

Money bro...a lack of money...banks will only loan so many % of disposable income...and since I'm staying in that one and not producing income from it...HDB was the only option...especially for civil servants...

:(

.

[curiouslala]

Wah lau..
U not only know her father but also her mother?
And even up her mother before?

Oh my..
Such a small world n unexpected story..

[Wizrd]

Wah lau..
U not only know her father but also her mother?
And even up her mother before?

Oh my..
Such a small world n unexpected story..


Alamak sis...don't rub it in any more can?? The heartache and guilt is already killing me...:(

(Oh...belum reply...deal with other things dulu siap?)

.

[Wizrd]

.


(Cont)


Chong and I already fried and grilled and burnt everything we had...so we started on our after-meal beers and were drinking quite a bit...and since it was between babies for Ching...she joined us to drink quite a bit too...Chong and I were running around with the kids and just goofing around having a great time...the ladies sat together and had their usual conference...no doubt complaining to each other about everything the guys did wrong...


It was getting late and the kids became tired...Chong and their maid took the kids upstairs to put them to bed...I went to get a box to pack up the BBQ stuff...my girlfriend needed the loo so she went upstairs with Chong...


When i returned with two boxes, Ching was still sitting on the bench sipping her beer....she looked so absorbed and serene, I left her alone and went to the BBQ pit to pack up...A while after I started cleaning and packing up...Ching came and stood in front of the BBQ pit opposite me...


Her eyes were red...and she seemed very deep in thought and breathing hard...


I didn’t think much of it...she can’t be upset with me right? Whatever Chong did...I can try to help smooth things over but it's not really my business...whatever it was, she will calm down and forgive him soon enough...So I continued packing and just casually said to her...'You ok, Ching??'


Then out of the blue....


‘You bastard...’...she hissed...barely loud enough for me to hear her...


Har what???? I put down the stuff and paid her more attention...


‘You fucking lying bastard...’...this time, she almost screamed it...


‘What Ching?’ I asked her...’What did I do??’


She shook her head and turned away...tears dripping off her face...


‘Ching...’...I said from behind her...’maybe you should stop drinking...’


She turned back around in a snap...’Don’t you dare tell me what I should do...’


‘Ok...ok...’...I backed off...scanning for where I left all the knives...in case she start reaching for them...


‘What has upset you, Ching? What's the problem?’ I asked...as calmly as I could...my heart was beating at the speed of sound now...


‘YOU!!!...you are the fucking problem...I believed you all this time...’...she said...’but you are such a lying bastard...’...she was quite a bit louder than I’d like...I can sense other people near the BBQ area staring at us...


She is drunk...I thought to myself....better find a way to calm her down before this becomes a scene...


Unfortunately for me...this was around the time Chong and my girlfriend came back to the BBQ area...if only Ching and I could have finished this conversation before they came back...but how was I to know at that time???


Ching was facing away at this time so they just came and join me...Chong started to pick things up and I motioned to him to stop...


‘I think Ching is drunk bro...maybe we better get her upstairs...’...I said quietly to Chong...


Chong frowned and looked concerned and started to go towards Ching...



(to be continued...)

.

[Tazzymercs]

speechless man lol...

you up her mother first..then up their daughter..hahahaha imagine when all things came to the light...

ching : " you bastard..you up me before already still wan up my daughter...

chong : " what? since when you up my wife...still now up my daughter..wan up me not..."

siao liao lol but you cannot deny leh the world really very small...scarily is you see something in the daughter which sub consciously remind you of ching...ho sey liao....

[curiouslala]

Alamak sis...don't rub it in any more can?? The heartache and guilt is already killing me...:(

(Oh...belum reply...deal with other things dulu siap?)

.

I'm just making conclusion leh..
Some more its just not me (pls check other comments)..

Honestly, the best way to heal is to rub it with salt..
Very painful but healed faster..

Just please be careful with your next move..
Or maybe you should find a fortune teller to get amulet?
Lol

:D

[Wizrd]

speechless man lol...

you up her mother first..then up their daughter..hahahaha imagine when all things came to the light...

ching : " you bastard..you up me before already still wan up my daughter...

chong : " what? since when you up my wife...still now up my daughter..wan up me not..."

siao liao lol but you cannot deny leh the world really very small...scarily is you see something in the daughter which sub consciously remind you of ching...ho sey liao....


:rolleyes: Na bei bro....for a speechless person, you have a lot of things to say hor? :mad:


:D (don't mind hor...'bitter middle make joy'....haiz...)


No lah, you are right bro...when I met her, I had this...'she is made for me'...feeling until I die die must approach type...

I thought it was because of the lady from the day before who 'pumped' sperm up to my brain...which is the only reason I put that woman in my original tale...now I realise she wasn't needed to guest star in my tale at all...hmmm...

But, I never saw the resemblance at all...not a hint of her parents...if I really must say she reminds me of anyone at all (now that I'm thinking about it...not then when I was with her...)...I'd say her auntie...Chong's sister...but even then...not really also...just a bit bit only....


Haiz...see how fucked up the situation really is yet??


It gets worse...:( stay tune...


.

[Wizrd]

I'm just making conclusion leh..
Some more its just not me (pls check other comments)..

Honestly, the best way to heal is to rub it with salt..
Very painful but healed faster..

Just please be careful with your next move..
Or maybe you should find a fortune teller to get amulet?
Lol

:D


Hahaha sis... No worries...understand where you're coming from...

Unfortunately, this drama episode is too real to me...

Yeah right...you say one har...you better not get a paper cut or something...I'll show up at your door with sea salt...and vinegar...and personally do the rubbing...then see how you heal...:mad:

Hahaha...no need see fortune teller lah...my star sign is ostrich...no eye see is my way to move on in life...:D

Cheers...


.

[Tazzymercs]

bro ka kin update lol so i can rub more salt in wound to make you heal faster !!!! wahahahahaha

[Wizrd]

bro ka kin update lol so i can rub more salt in wound to make you heal faster !!!! wahahahahaha


NNB...dog mouth cannot grow out elephant tusk....:mad:

Yeah bro...you and Lala both like salt rub right? No problems...when I revenge with salt rub, then don't blame me hor...:rolleyes:

:D

Yeah lah...ok lah...coming right up lah...
:p

.

[Wizrd]

.

(Cont)


Ching turned around and said...’Your girlfriend told me you guys are thinking of getting married...’...I wasn't sure if she even noticed there were two more people standing beside me...she wasn't really even looking at me...I think...


I looked at my girlfriend and she was beaming with a big smile on her face...


Chong, I think, was about to congratulate us...


‘Wait...’...I said...’we are just talking about a possibility...nothing is firm yet...’


‘Oh fuck you and your possibilities...’...Ching yelled...


This scared Chong too and my girlfriend suddenly realised this wasn’t fun and games...she backed away quietly into the dark...


‘All those time...’...Ching continued...’I waited for you...and believed you...then when you didn’t go to England, I thought ok, plans can change...no big deal....and now...after all the time you told me you do not believe in getting married...you are marrying her?? What is wrong with me?? Why won’t you marry me??’


Alrighty Houston...we have a problem...


‘Wait Ching...’...I said...even though I didn’t know what to say...’That was a long time ago...we...’


Chong stepped in...’What do you mean all the time you waited for him??’


I motioned for him to stay quiet but he ignored me...


Ching laughed...actually, looked a lot more like crying to me...’I was with him, didn’t you know?...he would fuck me every week...but wouldn’t call me his girlfriend...’


Chong stared at me...


‘That’s right...’.Ching continued...’because he wanted to go to England...and we won’t be together for long...yeah...but he didn’t go to England, did he??’


Chong shook his head slowly...still staring at me...


‘Ching...please...’..I said...but she cut me off...


‘Not only didn’t go to England...’..Ching yelled...’he is now willing to make someone his girlfriend...and even happy to marry her...the lying bastard...’


I wished for a hole to open up so that I can hide from this nightmare...but at the same time...perversely...I kinda felt it was deserved....even though I never lied to her...it was really my plan at that time....


‘You and he were together?’ Chong asked...very slowly...so slowly it was a bit creepy.


‘Yes of course..’..Ching laughed with tears flowing...’for almost a year...’


‘Why didn’t you tell me??’...he turned and asked me...


‘Errr bro...I never thought it was important...’...I said weakly...


‘Not important?’... Chong raised his voice...’you fucking my wife is not important!!!’


‘No bro...that was way before you got together with her...come on...’...I defended myself...


‘Then...’...Chong did the slow questioning again....veins popping out all over his forehead...’why didn’t you tell me?? Did you guys do anything after we got married??’


‘No bro...I swear...we stopped our relationship even before you met her...’


‘What??’ He yelled...


‘I mean...’...I was kinda stuttering...’before you and she got together...before you and she became an item...’


‘Then...why...not...tell...me??’ Chong asked again...this time more softly and very slowly...


Fuck...where are the bloody knives???? I can see his empty hands...but for how long more will they be empty???


At this stage...I think Ching 'woke' up and came to her senses...and perhaps realised the gravity of what she had done....


‘Chong...dear...’...she said to him in a gentle voice...’let’s forget this fucking liar and go home...’...she also started to walk towards him...


Chong did not move and just kept staring at me...his fists pumping open and close beside his hips...


Ching went over and held him...and slowly nudged him towards the lobby...she was not very steady on her feet, but he was like a stone statue...unmoving....


She said something into his ear...he shook his head...and she kept whispering to him...after a long while...way too long to me...he started to back away...one step...then another step...after 4 or 5 steps...he turned around...they walked away kinda holding and supporting each other...


‘We are not done with this yet’...he yelled out to me as they started to walk into the lobby...


I was in a state of shock...like a bus just hit me from the side without any warning...what the hell just happened??


Anyway...that was the end of that night...


I tried to call him the next few days and weeks...he never answered nor returned my calls...even though she never formally blamed me, his sister refused to help too...then a month or so later, I got a hand written note, I think it's from Ching because it was on them lilac-coloured paper that she likes...it was placed folded inside my mailbox...it contained only one word...


Sorry.


We never regained contact since that night...it was an all round world class fuck up...I lost two of my best friends in the world and gained a damned wife....errrrmm...(happy to report...) ex-wife....


(the end)

.

[targuse]

sad sad for u

[targuse]

i have up your point

[curiouslala]

Hahaha sis... No worries...understand where you're coming from...

Unfortunately, this drama episode is too real to me...

Yeah right...you say one har...you better not get a paper cut or something...I'll show up at your door with sea salt...and vinegar...and personally do the rubbing...then see how you heal...:mad:

Hahaha...no need see fortune teller lah...my star sign is ostrich...no eye see is my way to move on in life...:D

Cheers...


.
Well, if i have mouth ulcer, i rub salt on it..
It's healed in a few days.. :P

[henabi]

My gOsh... That night was way way WAY too epic... I don't think I will be able to handle it as well... Let alone trying to contact them for weeks n months...

So.... Theorically, since that written note you received from her, it has been like 20 over years until today?!?!

[mrsaint100]

interesting read for a while . However i guess u have protrayed to be a self centered person who has the ability to suay any women to be by your side, so i guess the years of damage did a karma return with such a dramatic ending. So did u managed to re establish the friendship ?

[SEAJ]

OH....MY....GOD!!

This is way way too wild!! One can make an Oscar Winning Movie script from this!

I WAS going to suggest that you should be straight up and just confront the situation with the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Before this last part, I had thought that since you and Chong were good buddies, that it would have been best for you to just be totally honest with his daughter, discuss with her if it would be wise to continue as lovers or not (hopefully not) and then the ways on how you and she could present you back to Ching and Chong. But this latest installment in the saga makes the whole thing just too perilous.

Or maybe not. For after all, the whole thing happened because you have been less than truthful to Ching, Chong and of course their daughter. I THINK that the whole thing with Ching and Chong 20 years ago had really been bothering you all these years - and this thing with their daughter now only brings the whole pain and tragic sorry tale back to the front burner.

I say that its about time you face the consequences once and for all - and since you ARE mostly at fault, you would be well deserving of any repercussions from it. I'd think that you would never be able to make peace with yourself for the rest of your life otherwise.

Withholding the truth, the aims justify the means, not being completely forward, not relaying important matter/news as its more convenient - yes, failings that most of us ARE guilty of. But in your case, it has led you to where you are at today.

Not saying it's Karma or retribution or anything even remotely close to this - but this all came about because of YOU and because you failed to communicate fully when there was a need to have done so. And I'd like for you to consider to come out with it all once and for all; even print out and show him this whole thread (errr...not a good idea actually, as it would be salt to Ching, Chong and their daughter's wounds!). Ok scrap that, but IMHO, the TRUTH is still your best course of action.

The worst that can happen is that you will make an enemy of the whole Chong family - but as it is, right now, I'd think that Chong, Ching hates you...and their daughter must also NOT have you in her good books. I mean - what is she supposed to think of you just disappearing?? And maybe get punched or .....????
But, look-it, as it is, they are now NOT the good friends and practically family that you had outlined to us as was the case in the past!!

But the upside is that you may gain back some very important people that are dear to you.
I'd like to remind you that Good Friends are worth ALL the trouble.

Just MY POV - which is what I THINK you want??

Respects...and my good luck to you ...whatever you decide to do.

SEAJ

[Tazzymercs]

Originally Posted by Tazzymercs
speechless man lol...

you up her mother first..then up their daughter..hahahaha imagine when all things came to the light...

ching : " you bastard..you up me before already still wan up my daughter...

chong : " what? since when you up my wife...still now up my daughter..wan up me not..."

siao liao lol but you cannot deny leh the world really very small...scarily is you see something in the daughter which sub consciously remind you of ching...ho sey liao....


HO SEY LIAO...

Bro i guess correctly liao lol standard reply..I'm good lol KNN but i hate to guess correctly coz it is so painful lo....lost 2 friends leh...told ya you should have came clean ma...then its up to them to decide whether they wan to be together ma..

as the sayings goes 有缘千里能相会，无缘对面不相逢...

i really feel dread for you sia..imagine you come clean liao to chong that you up his daughter...but i dont think you up chong daughter...coz..you all never contact already right..how to carry her..hmmmmmm..but if is real...the punch he had been saving up for years will come x2 de lol one for his wife..one for the wife...and one for the daughter...maybe plus one more for future son in law...wahahahaha...blue black liao.....( PASS THE SALT PLEASE)

i think you up your buddy daughter...? wah lau...now confusing liao....KNN lol

[Wizrd]

sad sad for u

Yes...very...very sad...:(


i have up your point

Thanks for the upzz...

Cheers...

.

[Wizrd]

Well, if i have mouth ulcer, i rub salt on it..
It's healed in a few days.. :P


Aiya...in the mouth, sooner or later will heal one...no need salt at all...

But next time when you have cut or tear in more tender and sensitive areas...I'll be ready with the salt rub...:p

Hahaha...others are helping me work on my problem...you are still focused on salt rub...cha bo really prioritise things differently...but no choice in life...still gotta love women...:D

Cheers sis...

.

[Wizrd]

My gOsh... That night was way way WAY too epic... I don't think I will be able to handle it as well... Let alone trying to contact them for weeks n months...

So.... Theorically, since that written note you received from her, it has been like 20 over years until today?!?!


Thanks bro...

At that time...I saw it as the only window of opportunity to clear things up with him/them...and as history has bore out...once I missed it, there is no turning back...ever... :(

Yes bro...more than 20 years...no contact whatsoever...


Cheers bro...

.

[Wizrd]

interesting read for a while . However i guess u have protrayed to be a self centered person who has the ability to suay any women to be by your side, so i guess the years of damage did a karma return with such a dramatic ending. So did u managed to re establish the friendship ?

Thanks for reading and commenting bro...

I think as human, we are all self centred...the difference is just in degrees...

This is not really Karma bro...it's just my guilt killing me...but...the karma I'm seriously worried about is when I up...not someone else's daughter...now that would be real karma...

Nope...in all these years...never had the pleasure of re-establishing anything with them... :o

Cheers bro..

.

[Wizrd]

OH....MY....GOD!!

This is way way too wild!! One can make an Oscar Winning Movie script from this!

Thanks bro...I guess...


I WAS going to suggest that you should be straight up and just confront the situation with the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Before this last part, I had thought that since you and Chong were good buddies, that it would have been best for you to just be totally honest with his daughter, discuss with her if it would be wise to continue as lovers or not (hopefully not) and then the ways on how you and she could present you back to Ching and Chong. But this latest installment in the saga makes the whole thing just too perilous.

Bro...maybe I never made this clear...but while I feel a little sad about what happened between Chong and me...I have moved on...I do not think it was my fault at all and it was merely bad timing and misunderstanding...we cannot have everything in life and I accepted losing my best friends way back then...

The guilt I feel now comes from the girl...I really like her and the guilt come from hurting her for doing an MIA...



Or maybe not. For after all, the whole thing happened because you have been less than truthful to Ching, Chong and of course their daughter. I THINK that the whole thing with Ching and Chong 20 years ago had really been bothering you all these years - and this thing with their daughter now only brings the whole pain and tragic sorry tale back to the front burner.

I say that its about time you face the consequences once and for all - and since you ARE mostly at fault, you would be well deserving of any repercussions from it. I'd think that you would never be able to make peace with yourself for the rest of your life otherwise.

Withholding the truth, the aims justify the means, not being completely forward, not relaying important matter/news as its more convenient - yes, failings that most of us ARE guilty of. But in your case, it has led you to where you are at today.

Hang on bro...how was I less than truthful with Ching?

I really was planning to leave Sg after NS...even got a place in Uni in Scotland already...

As to the marriage part...she was with me for roughly 8 months...about 3 months as just friends...and she wanted out...the woman I eventually married...and at the time of that fateful night, was with me for almost 4 years...stuck by me despite me saying exactly the same things as I said to Ching in terms of not wanting to settle down until after getting my degree...

Retrospectively...if Ching hung on to me for even a year longer...until I joined the Air Force...she might have gotten her wish to marry me...but no, she quit, she wanted out, she gave up on us...and then she blames me?

As to Chong...yes, maybe he can be angry with me...but I was never deceitful to him...firstly, he asked me to help him win Ching over and I helped as best I can....secondly, as I replied to this question earlier...how does one say something like this to a best friend (and when ever a good time for this chat?)...if he merely asked me what I thought of Ching, I probably would have told him...but he tells me he liked her, in fact obsessing about her...as his best friend, how to tell him? Before he told me...it was none of his business who I or Ching slept with, right?...thirdly...perhaps my western mentality and his eastern mentality do not gel perfectly...but I still maintain...she and I were no longer together for many months before he even said he liked her...so there was no issue in my mind...and lastly...he is angry with me for not telling him? What about Ching? She never told him either...why is that my fault only bro?


As for the daughter...how does one be truthful in that situation? When she showed me the photos, should I say, hey, your father was my best friend??

Please think this through bro...what is her next question? Oh, really? I never heard of you before...what happened that you and daddy have not met for more than 20 years? (Because I should know, or know about you otherwise). Then should I also be truthful and tell her that her father was upset because I was fucking her mother?

I understand being truthful is good bro...but where do we draw the line?

Before she showed me the photo, I was as truthful as I can be other than my identity...unless I recite all my past and present friends and relationships to her before bedding her...or check out all her relatives and friends...there is no way we would have prevented the situation...



Not saying it's Karma or retribution or anything even remotely close to this - but this all came about because of YOU and because you failed to communicate fully when there was a need to have done so. And I'd like for you to consider to come out with it all once and for all; even print out and show him this whole thread (errr...not a good idea actually, as it would be salt to Ching, Chong and their daughter's wounds!). Ok scrap that, but IMHO, the TRUTH is still your best course of action.

The worst that can happen is that you will make an enemy of the whole Chong family - but as it is, right now, I'd think that Chong, Ching hates you...and their daughter must also NOT have you in her good books. I mean - what is she supposed to think of you just disappearing?? And maybe get punched or .....????


Thanks bro...but now that I'm MIA to her...the worst that can happen is that she hurts for longer than I'm praying for...I do not see any benefit to anyone to be honest to her or her family about this...not me, not Chong, not Ching and not the girl...contacting her again has only downsides...I will find a way to deal with my guilt...no point ruining the 'peace' of one whole family just so that I can ease my guilt...and as I asked before bro...please think this through...what happens after I 'come clean'...and after taking the punches? I will most probably have to disappear after anyway...so all I have accomplished is to bring more hurt to more people yet I'll be back to exactly where I am to her...MIA...

What exactly is the point of coming clean bro?



But, look-it, as it is, they are now NOT the good friends and practically family that you had outlined to us as was the case in the past!!

I don't know bro...we have had no contact for more than 22-23 years...



But the upside is that you may gain back some very important people that are dear to you.
I'd like to remind you that Good Friends are worth ALL the trouble.

Please read above bro...



Just MY POV - which is what I THINK you want??

Respects...and my good luck to you ...whatever you decide to do.

Thanks bro...yes, I want your POV...that's why I posted this...

Please do not take offence with my replies bro...I'm just trying to work through, in my own mind as well as reply to you...all the points you mentioned...nothing was pointed at you for trying to help ok? I take your points on board and am merely throwing out my take as a reaction...neither of us is all correct or all wrong...it's down to perspective...and I respect your views even if I do not agree to some f them...

Thanks again bro...

Cheers...

.

[yatachi]

I guess in this world nothing can be covered up. It will come and bite you around "paper cannot cover fire" the truth being made known is bad enough. But to loose 2 very good friend is worst.

[Tazzymercs]

BRO!! i just realized...if she can show you photos of her and dad....

wait..eh i confuse liao lol i tot you said that u used to carry her when she was a baby....then now u say you no contact with the daddy...wah lau lol how come your memories so lol scattered de.....

Y U NO LIKE ME...

anyway if she can show you pics of chung ching daughter and daddy..then if daddy shows her pics of you and daddy...i really wonder how she would react sia...

[Wizrd]

HO SEY LIAO...

Bro i guess correctly liao lol standard reply..I'm good lol KNN but i hate to guess correctly coz it is so painful lo....lost 2 friends leh...told ya you should have came clean ma...then its up to them to decide whether they wan to be together ma..

as the sayings goes 有缘千里能相会，无缘对面不相逢...

i really feel dread for you sia..imagine you come clean liao to chong that you up his daughter...but i dont think you up chong daughter...coz..you all never contact already right..how to carry her..hmmmmmm..but if is real...the punch he had been saving up for years will come x2 de lol one for his wife..one for the wife...and one for the daughter...maybe plus one more for future son in law...wahahahaha...blue black liao.....( PASS THE SALT PLEASE)

i think you up your buddy daughter...? wah lau...now confusing liao....KNN lol


Hahaha...KKN bro...your posts always make me laugh...even though they hurt sooo much...na bei...can't imagine if you add salt some more...:eek:

No need to prepare for punches lah...I think MIA is the way to go...otherwise, it's a police case for sure...

So...better I self-impose the FBI witness protection programme before the mob comes after me...

Tell me if you don't agree...

Cheers bro...

.

[Wizrd]

I guess in this world nothing can be covered up. It will come and bite you around "paper cannot cover fire" the truth being made known is bad enough. But to loose 2 very good friend is worst.


Sorry bro...I don't understand what you're saying...care to explain again please?

Cheers...

.

[Wizrd]

BRO!! i just realized...if she can show you photos of her and dad....

wait..eh i confuse liao lol i tot you said that u used to carry her when she was a baby....then now u say you no contact with the daddy...wah lau lol how come your memories so lol scattered de.....

Y U NO LIKE ME...

anyway if she can show you pics of chung ching daughter and daddy..then if daddy shows her pics of you and daddy...i really wonder how she would react sia...


WTF bro...what talking you???

If my memory like yours then I really hum ka lan already lah... :mad:

Read the last part of the story again bro...even on that night I carried her while we were running around the garden...(KNN...memory shorter than one page still dare to brag...haiz....)

And that fateful night was more than 20+ years ago...btw, if my memory serves (unfortunately not quite like yours yet...:p)...she should be 24-25yo this year...

Still confused bro?

Yeah...we were not big in taking photos back then...some in camp stuff with camo on faces type...other than that...almost nothing...maybe Ching has one or two of me, but I was soooo young (and cute) then, and doubt she'll flaunt it around....and she doesn't have a photo of me...remember that I said I acted blur when she asked for one? Oh sorry...forgot about your power memory...hahaha...

Na bei...:D


.

[Tazzymercs]

NNB la bro :)

i think i really confused liao okok here my confused part ah...maybe too much chong ching chung liao lol

be more patient with me leh lol i wanna rub more salt de hahaha no la joking..

1) coz you said lost all contact with chong liao right after that fateful night wwe showdown with both chong and ching..and then no contact le ma..so hor this part i abit confuse..they haven married yet right? or they married liao then have kids and you carried her liao?

2) no la i never say you have send her pics..but is that some how chong got old pictures taken with you ma..then one fine day he took it out and show the daughter..

chong : " hey darling...see this is last time daddy..slim slim hor...like a monkey..see this is daddy's friend..wizrd..my old buddy..blah blah blah"

then she see liao i really wonder what will course thru her mind sia lol

gonna be an exciting moment for the chong family

[Tazzymercs]

ok scrape number 1 point lol KNN i re read again liao lol KNN

too many chong ching make my brain chin chow liao lol

my deepest apologies...hahahaha wah lau :p

and my deepest condolences hahahaha if point number 2 shows up in chong family discussion

[Wizrd]

ok scrape number 1 point lol KNN i re read again liao lol KNN

too many chong ching make my brain chin chow liao lol

my deepest apologies...hahahaha wah lau :p

and my deepest condolences hahahaha if point number 2 shows up in chong family discussion


Hahaha bro...why you still up? :eek:

I thought you zzzz already...even edited my earlier reply to you after I thought of what you wrote...

Yeah, second points is a bit of concern but those pics (and old time quality) really cmi one lah...even my own mother will have problems picking me out of those pics...only we know by knowing where we were standing, sitting etc...

So I'd say at most a 2.21% probability of causing a problem...

The other concern are photo that Ching has...but since the bust up...doubt she will ever bring them out as long as Chong is alive....let alone show her children...

So I'd say at most 1.778% chance of happening and 5.96% chance of causing a problem...

Plus...when she and I were joking and teasing each other...she guessed my age to be 15-18 years younger than I am...so I doubt she will ever connect that her father and I are in the same generation...

Overall, not worth worrying about for now...

But good points though bro...I hadn't thought about getting screwed by old photos before...thanks for a sleepless night now...:rolleyes:

Cheers bro...:D


.

[ChairmanMao]

Bro, you are fucked...

lol, so true

[ChevelleZ]

Hahahaha damn it man!its not troule with capital T but its
Fucked with F :D

Haiyo yo bro, i think u shold ask ur self first lah
Do u really like her? Yes/no?
If no then just run lol
Do u really love her?
If no, run again lah
If yes, then I think u should tell her that u really love her
But something bother u which is ur history about her parent
U know.. In some way, we r similar
(Always wanna go uni in england but never, always dun believe in marriage but 'kena' married one n divorced, chased similar girl with best friend but actually already up the girl in front..:D..trying to hook up with girls...randomly)
I guess u know too lor that if a girl really love a man then willing to do anything
If she is not that willing then maybe if its a sign not to be together loh
And if u serious about her then continue lah became serious lah
But importantly i think u should call her so she wont think u just an a-hole
Tht treat her only like a random slut lol :D

For the parent ah...if u determined n serious about the daughter
They will not look back lah
I think its childish crap if they still get angry
and who knows maybe after that night u spiced up their sex life
Cuz chong on bed start asking ching like 'is he better than me' 'is he bigger than me?' 'How u did with him' etc
No lah just kidding lah... Hahahahahaha
I a person that think
People came n go..also friendship
But if it keeps coming back then perhaps its a sign tht u need to clear up
the unfinished business. Whether, they still reject u or not then i believe
in the of the day you still have better closer for your self
If they reject u then it meant to be like that... ;)

[curiouslala]

Aiya...in the mouth, sooner or later will heal one...no need salt at all...

But next time when you have cut or tear in more tender and sensitive areas...I'll be ready with the salt rub...:p

Hahaha...others are helping me work on my problem...you are still focused on salt rub...cha bo really prioritise things differently...but no choice in life...still gotta love women...:D

Cheers sis...

.

Lol..
Just saying nia la..

Anyway, my advice is still the same la.. RUN!
And please keep your radar up or put 10 radars when you're coming to her town..
I'm sure that you don't want to bump into Chong or Ching or your sweet gal or maybe helping their other children in the street n then being invited to meet the parents for thank you party..
I always have the worst scenarios in my head..

The worst isn't if Chong finally punch u in your face bcos u slept with her daughter..
But if he had heart attack once he saw you being intro-ed by her daughter as guy friend..
So, the worst would be he died in your arms..
And you will be Chong's family ultimate enemy..

Too much drama?
Well, i also think so.. But drama created from real daily life story mah..


Anyway, like u said above, you're actually not really wrong..
But, I guess he's just a normal cave (traditional) guy..
Other guy can be his wife's ex screw partner, but he nv expected his best buddy as one and some more fix them up together.. And at that time, his wife still have feelings for his best friend..
I think he felt like you're giving him an invisible slap in his face..

Maybe you should ask guys in here how would they think n feel if their best friend screw his wife before they get married? N their wives still hv feeling for his best friend even after they get married n having two lovely children..
I think, most of them will be disappointed of his best friend.. And maybe hate him..

Bcos she won't be mad at that time if she dun have any feelings for u..
And if he forgive you, you'll still in touch with him.. And he'll be the first one to be there when your marriage life goes down.. But he didn't.
Well, he maybe forgive you, but not be able to forget what happened..

Remember to watch your back when you go back to Australia..
I'm sure, no matter how long, you won't want to bump into her or any of them..
Bcos if last time you still can run n take cover, I dun think you'll get any chance to run on 2nd meeting..
And please be careful too when you try to hook up gals. At least, eyeing her first before approaching.. No one knows if you meet her in another place..

Hopefully you're not too scared with my worst case scenario view..
Bcos if I'm you, I'll run n camo myself..

:D

[Squeezy]

TS,

I guess the best thing for you is to quickly come back and leave Perth without saying goodbye... It's cruel but it's the best thing to do...at least...for me..

Can't blame you for the screw up case...all man think differently and with all the ladies makeup skills, they really looked older than they look now...

[tripleaxe]

TS, put it plainly, you don't need our POV. You already know what you have to, ought to & should do.

Surely you are not hoping for an eureka answer or attain enlightenment in your situation.

So all this talk i see, is you wanting someone to talk to only, or at best to justify what you intended to do.

Isn't that right!

[tcrecruit]

Guess if I were u after reading thru 9 pages, n I really liked the gal, then be straight to her. Maybe she can't accept all the facts and call it off, she would have solved the problem for ya. If she's willing to continue after listening, then you may have found your gem...

[tungsten]

TS, here is my POV.

The 3 "adults" (you, chong and ching) are wrong in this issue. It is not important to argue who is "more wrong" in this issue. What matters is that all 3 of you contribute to this issue.

You - Seriously I do not bother with how "western" are you in that age when you matchmake the two. What matters is that you already know that your good friend is such a conservative person. How would a conservative person react in such a situation? PISSED.... That is the reaction. Awkward or not, it is better to have tell him upfront then that actually both you and ching were an item before and sex was involved. It would have been much easier. I have a similar situation... Not so drama as you but it was averted because me and my best buddy chose to be upfront with each other. They did not stay together but our friendship did.

Chong - Calling himself your buddy yet he did not give you a chance to tell your side of the story.

Ching - For being a bitch and ruin the friendship between you and Chong in the faishion. It is not right. If one cannot hold his or her own liquor, then for fuck sake stop drinking so much. WTF...

The only innocent party is the daughter. All this godpa, best friend and whatever nonsense is not her fault. As long as you are not her biological father, what is stopping you and her to get together? Her parents? Oh please, at least give her the chance to decide. What has happen in the past is the fault of everyone in your generation. Though if you are going to dump her subsequently after she fall out with her parents... Then you are a real fucking bastard. Period...

If I were in your situation and serious about this girl, I would just tell her upfront about what has happen in the past. If she is willing to risk a total fall out with the family, then I will talk with Ching and Chong. If not, then at least the damage is reduced at her level and she is given a chance to decide what to do.

If talking to Ching and Chong turns out to be positive, then that is the best. You get a young, sexy and fuckable wife. At the same time, you solved your buddy issue.

If it is not positive and the daughter leave you. It just turns out that girl is not strong enough to fight to be with the one that she love. At the same time, you know that Ching and Chong are not really buddy material since they are not willing to talk things out despite you making the first step.

Be a man and not a wussy... Use logic and not just emotion to solve this issue. Once the decision/consequence tree is drafted, you realise that it is not that difficult to make a logical decision.

[tcrecruit]

However, if Ching is still as fiery as she was donkey years ago, then it's a gone case... A more appropriate act will be to tell your new gal about the whole story, n then tell her you won't continue with her as you know her mum n dad will not b receptive n you want her to continue living happily with her parents n not ruin their lives again.. For the 3rd soul...

[Wizrd]

lol, so true


:o...so very very true...:(


.

[Wizrd]

Hahahaha damn it man!its not troule with capital T but its
Fucked with F

Haiyo yo bro, i think u shold ask ur self first lah
Do u really like her? Yes/no?
If no then just run lol
Do u really love her?
If no, run again lah
If yes, then I think u should tell her that u really love her
But something bother u which is ur history about her parent
U know.. In some way, we r similar
(Always wanna go uni in england but never, always dun believe in marriage but 'kena' married one n divorced, chased similar girl with best friend but actually already up the girl in front..:D..trying to hook up with girls...randomly)
I guess u know too lor that if a girl really love a man then willing to do anything
If she is not that willing then maybe if its a sign not to be together loh
And if u serious about her then continue lah became serious lah
But importantly i think u should call her so she wont think u just an a-hole
Tht treat her only like a random slut lol

For the parent ah...if u determined n serious about the daughter
They will not look back lah
I think its childish crap if they still get angry
and who knows maybe after that night u spiced up their sex life
Cuz chong on bed start asking ching like 'is he better than me' 'is he bigger than me?' 'How u did with him' etc
No lah just kidding lah... Hahahahahaha
I a person that think
People came n go..also friendship
But if it keeps coming back then perhaps its a sign tht u need to clear up
the unfinished business. Whether, they still reject u or not then i believe
in the of the day you still have better closer for your self
If they reject u then it meant to be like that...


Wah bro...really quite similar leh...please tell me you didn't join Air Force ok? I cannot hack it if I suddenly find my 'twin' here...:eek:

Yes bro...I agree with your assessment...but...as much as I like her...I'm not sure all the untold stress and drama is worth it to go through the inquisition again...

Maybe you are right in that, but I doubt life (or fate) is asking me to clear up the past...I think it's just a case of wrong time, wrong place and wrong person that's all...I believe we all have some regrets that can never be properly resolved...:(

Cheers bro...:)

.

[Wizrd]

Lol..
Just saying nia la..

Anyway, my advice is still the same la.. RUN!

Hopefully you're not too scared with my worst case scenario view..
Bcos if I'm you, I'll run n camo myself..

:D

Hahahahahaha sis...

No lah...just tekan you a bit nia la...:D

Yes...cannot agree more...run road is the best option and like Forrest Gump did...I've already started running...

I'm seldom in Perth nowadays, but you are right...RADAR permanently on...and while in Perth...full camo must be in place...

Cheers sis...

.

[Wizrd]

TS,

I guess the best thing for you is to quickly come back and leave Perth without saying goodbye... It's cruel but it's the best thing to do...at least...for me..

Can't blame you for the screw up case...all man think differently and with all the ladies makeup skills, they really looked older than they look now...


Hi bro...

Thanks and I think your solution is the best option too...


Cheers...

.

[Wizrd]

TS, put it plainly, you don't need our POV. You already know what you have to, ought to & should do.

Surely you are not hoping for an eureka answer or attain enlightenment in your situation.

So all this talk i see, is you wanting someone to talk to only, or at best to justify what you intended to do.

Isn't that right!


Thanks bro...

Not exactly true though...when I first posted...I was still in contact with her and thinking how to best talk it out with her...and then the suggestion of MIA came out and I adopted it as the best practice...

You are right that I already knew what to do (in fact done...) in the later few pages...but the later pages are done to give my earlier readers the background on why I was so stressed...

Yes bro...when have unresolveable issues...most people need someone to talk to...


Cheers bro...

.

[yang punk]

TS. If you had been a bastard, one who fucked and boasted, then you would not have this Ching-Chong problem! So sometimes being a gentleman fucker is not always a good thing. Anyway it was Ching who leaked the info of her past relationship with you and that's why she apologized. Their migration was probably to save their marriage and to assure Chong that she would never have the opportunity to see you again. Chinaman thinking is like that one! :D

It is highly unlikely that you would want to settle down with their daughter no matter how good a fuck she is after knowing where she comes from! So unless you want to cause her more distress (as well as open new wounds for Ching-Chong) then going AWOL is the best solution. Not sure if it would help her move on if you just write to her and tell her that you were just out for fun and not a serious relationship, using age differences, bad experience with past marriage, etc.

[Wizrd]

Guess if I were u after reading thru 9 pages, n I really liked the gal, then be straight to her. Maybe she can't accept all the facts and call it off, she would have solved the problem for ya. If she's willing to continue after listening, then you may have found your gem...

However, if Ching is still as fiery as she was donkey years ago, then it's a gone case... A more appropriate act will be to tell your new gal about the whole story, n then tell her you won't continue with her as you know her mum n dad will not b receptive n you want her to continue living happily with her parents n not ruin their lives again.. For the 3rd soul...


Thanks bro...


While I see the merit in your suggestion...I cannot help getting the feeling that it will go terribly wrong...

I am certain she will ask for the reasons I am not longer in contact with her parents...and from her personality ( what little I have seen...) she will not be afraid to 'confront' her parents...and the whole lobang will be so picchared until no way of mending or hiding from any more...

My premise is still the same...why drag so many people through the pain again...for now, I feel guilty for hurting her, but any additional action on my part will be (to me anyway...) unforgivable should it hurt the whole family, together and as a individuals...just so that I can have one young woman's company...

Whether its true love or not, or whether marriage is possible or not...nothing guarantees that she and I will be together forever....meanwhile, once the truth is out...the pain is almost guaranteed to last that family for as long a they live...weighing the pros and cons...hurting one woman may be the best option...


Cheers bro...

.

[Wizrd]

TS, here is my POV.

The 3 "adults" (you, chong and ching) are wrong in this issue. It is not important to argue who is "more wrong" in this issue. What matters is that all 3 of you contribute to this issue.

You - Seriously I do not bother with how "western" are you in that age when you matchmake the two. What matters is that you already know that your good friend is such a conservative person. How would a conservative person react in such a situation? PISSED.... That is the reaction. Awkward or not, it is better to have tell him upfront then that actually both you and ching were an item before and sex was involved. It would have been much easier. I have a similar situation... Not so drama as you but it was averted because me and my best buddy chose to be upfront with each other. They did not stay together but our friendship did.

Chong - Calling himself your buddy yet he did not give you a chance to tell your side of the story.

Ching - For being a bitch and ruin the friendship between you and Chong in the faishion. It is not right. If one cannot hold his or her own liquor, then for fuck sake stop drinking so much. WTF...

The only innocent party is the daughter. All this godpa, best friend and whatever nonsense is not her fault. As long as you are not her biological father, what is stopping you and her to get together? Her parents? Oh please, at least give her the chance to decide. What has happen in the past is the fault of everyone in your generation. Though if you are going to dump her subsequently after she fall out with her parents... Then you are a real fucking bastard. Period...

If I were in your situation and serious about this girl, I would just tell her upfront about what has happen in the past. If she is willing to risk a total fall out with the family, then I will talk with Ching and Chong. If not, then at least the damage is reduced at her level and she is given a chance to decide what to do.

If talking to Ching and Chong turns out to be positive, then that is the best. You get a young, sexy and fuckable wife. At the same time, you solved your buddy issue.

If it is not positive and the daughter leave you. It just turns out that girl is not strong enough to fight to be with the one that she love. At the same time, you know that Ching and Chong are not really buddy material since they are not willing to talk things out despite you making the first step.

Be a man and not a wussy... Use logic and not just emotion to solve this issue. Once the decision/consequence tree is drafted, you realise that it is not that difficult to make a logical decision.


Hi bro...

Thanks for your take...and I cannot disagree with much of what you have said...

I do see my own mistakes in the whole situation...but like I said before...time and space helped create the situation as well...yes, I'm in no way blameless but then again...I did what I believed to be the best thing for everyone concerned at the time...

And yes...to get her to side me then to leave her later would make me the ultimate bastard...but bro...I cannot get into a relationship with that amount of pressure hanging over me...no one should... It becomes a one way relationship because should she later become a real evil witch to me...I will still need to be with her to atone for my prior sins for putting her through the family fall out (should she choose the option...)

That is no way for anyone to live a life bro...

Thanks and I really appreciate your point of view....

Cheers...


.

[Wizrd]

TS. If you had been a bastard, one who fucked and boasted, then you would not have this Ching-Chong problem! So sometimes being a gentleman fucker is not always a good thing. Anyway it was Ching who leaked the info of her past relationship with you and that's why she apologized. Their migration was probably to save their marriage and to assure Chong that she would never have the opportunity to see you again. Chinaman thinking is like that one! :D

It is highly unlikely that you would want to settle down with their daughter no matter how good a fuck she is after knowing where she comes from! So unless you want to cause her more distress (as well as open new wounds for Ching-Chong) then going AWOL is the best solution. Not sure if it would help her move on if you just write to her and tell her that you were just out for fun and not a serious relationship, using age differences, bad experience with past marriage, etc.


Thanks bro...

I agree with you 100%...

I was thinking about giving her some excuse like age difference, country difference etc to 'break up' with her...but after reading the POVs from earlier comments...I am not sure that going MIA will hurt her more that the 'break up' method...the downside of MIA is I have no way of knowing how long this will hurt her for...but the downside of giving her excuses will no doubt create a ten thousand questions session which will drag the whole thing out...even if it doesn't, she will know those are just unconvincing excuses and may be even more hurt that I would play her with them...

I don't know bro...I'm still considering just writing to her in a way that she cannot reply type....but I'm still hurt by what Ching did to me...apologising without giving me a chance to express my own opinion...why to it back to her daughter...

Perhaps the best is to leave things as is now since I'm already MIA to her...

Cheers bro...


.

[SEAJ]

My premise is still the same...why drag so many people through the pain again...for now, I feel guilty for hurting her, but any additional action on my part will be (to me anyway...) unforgivable should it hurt the whole family, together and as a individuals...just so that I can have one young woman's company...
.
Because healing of any wounds can only occur if you tackle it at source, or if your bodily resistance is strong enough to heal itself.

OK, you did try to heal the wound 20 years ago but Ching + Chong had rebuffed you. You’re probably hoping and THINKING that over the years, your body had miraculously somehow healed everything; but as is what is happening now, the infection is not only back, but back with a vengeance.

Yes, I totally see that you had tried your best in smoothing out the path for Ching+Chong, but even the best of intentions can - and in your case, do - go awry. And please don't tell me that since you've tried your best, that you can be held totally blameless. It happened because of circumstances and action by 3 parties of which you are one of them.

The most important thing and the one thing that I want you to put a priority on is this nebulous concept of "Friendship." OK, I may be a bit old fashioned on this, but I do believe that you probably put as much importance to friendship as I do. There is no substitute for good friends and I am a believer of always trying to do everything possible to preserve friendship.

I had a similar thing happen to me when my good friend/apartment mate for many years whilst in University, married my "steady Girlfriend" after she and I broke off; in fact I think that this situation happens a lot more than most people think (Just IMHO). Anyway, after 25 years, I decided to go back to my old university town and of course hooked up with my old friends still there - including D my room mate and RA, my ex-GF. We had a helluva great re-union and partied till the wee hours like we used to always do in the past - as if we had not seen each other for just a couple of weeks!!

The next day, I phoned for D but RA picked it up and she told me that she's really pissed off and must see me right away. Huh???!!! Anyway, within 15 minutes she was banging on my hotel room and came storming in whilst crying up a storm, screaming "you really hurt me, you really hurt me. All these years and I can still the pain as if it was yesterday!"

I retorted "What? What??!! Its you who left me back then - but if I did hurt you, then I'm sorry, I'm really sorry!!"

Then she rushed over to me and hugged me tight whilst saying "that's all I wanted to hear, all I wanted to hear…. all these years……"

25 years and that hurt had stayed with her – never mind that it was her who left me (cause she had gone to see her pastor for counseling about my relationship with her – and can you believe it, this bastard who was married actually ended up seducing her and convincing her to leave me – CHRIST!! But that’s another story!!).

So like you, I thought that I was totally blameless, but there’s no accounting for human feelings – and especially female human feelings!! But that what is more important and remain is FRIENDSHIP - which still stays and is something that we all cherish.

And NOOOOO….. just in case y’all are wondering, RA and I never did anything more than have that soul clearing and heartfelt hug. Yeah, she stayed a bit more and we did a lot of talking which re-established the bonds D, RA and I had I had in days past.

As for your previous statement that you didn’t want to “re-open old wounds” well, the wound from 20 years ago is still festering in ALL OF YOU! Don’t for one moment think that Ching + Chong never, ever argued over the events of 20 years ago; and from what I can detect from your writings, the pain and the regret you’ve been living with for the past 20 years still very much remains in your psyche.

As you know, marriage per se is so difficult as it is already, and if you are the gentleman that I think you are, I would hope that you would think it IS your duty to assist your 2 friends in cementing their marriage….even if it means that they will forever consider you their common enemy….as a way of coping with the facts….as a way of ignoring the truth of the matter. But IMHO, when you do meet up with them, I really very seriously doubt that this will cause any further rancour in their marriage. It’s also something they need to bring out into the open, and …..treat properly once and for all.

I still say that you need to come totally clean with the daughter, explain in minute details like you did on here what happened and come up with a plan to meet up with her parents – YOUR GOOD FRIENDS!

I don’t for one minute (from reading all that you’ve written here only of course) think that you are the sort of guy who can or should turn away from difficult matters. You’re the type of guy who needs to confront it and do something about it.

And BTW – my opinion on your relationship with the young lady; this is so minor in comparison to the massive problem you, C + C have that it must be left on the back burner. You know that you’re a player and this girl is only just one of a string of others and is really of no significance when compared to the cancer that’s been festering between you and her parents.

You don’t take this one opportunity and you will forever regret it. Just my thinking of course – but I believe that things happen for a reason; what reason is there for you to chance upon their daughter of all the people you meet as a pilot travelling around all the time??

Just all IMHO and I also hope you do not take offense at what my suggestion is. I got lucky with RA and D, whilst you do need to bite the bullet if you do tackle Ching + Chong. But let me tell you, the result will be very satisfying and will cement your opinion of yourself as being a righteous gentleman.

SEAJ

[Wizrd]

Because healing of any wounds can only occur if you tackle it at source, or if your bodily resistance is strong enough to heal itself.

OK, you did try to heal the wound 20 years ago but Ching + Chong had rebuffed you. You’re probably hoping and THINKING that over the years, your body had miraculously somehow healed everything; but as is what is happening now, the infection is not only back, but back with a vengeance.

Yes, I totally see that you had tried your best in smoothing out the path for Ching+Chong, but even the best of intentions can - and in your case, do - go awry. And please don't tell me that since you've tried your best, that you can be held totally blameless. It happened because of circumstances and action by 3 parties of which you are one of them.

The most important thing and the one thing that I want you to put a priority on is this nebulous concept of "Friendship." OK, I may be a bit old fashioned on this, but I do believe that you probably put as much importance to friendship as I do. There is no substitute for good friends and I am a believer of always trying to do everything possible to preserve friendship.

I had a similar thing happen to me when my good friend/apartment mate for many years whilst in University, married my "steady Girlfriend" after she and I broke off; in fact I think that this situation happens a lot more than most people think (Just IMHO). Anyway, after 25 years, I decided to go back to my old university town and of course hooked up with my old friends still there - including D my room mate and RA, my ex-GF. We had a helluva great re-union and partied till the wee hours like we used to always do in the past - as if we had not seen each other for just a couple of weeks!!

The next day, I phoned for D but RA picked it up and she told me that she's really pissed off and must see me right away. Huh???!!! Anyway, within 15 minutes she was banging on my hotel room and came storming in whilst crying up a storm, screaming "you really hurt me, you really hurt me. All these years and I can still the pain as if it was yesterday!"

I retorted "What? What??!! Its you who left me back then - but if I did hurt you, then I'm sorry, I'm really sorry!!"

Then she rushed over to me and hugged me tight whilst saying "that's all I wanted to hear, all I wanted to hear…. all these years……"

25 years and that hurt had stayed with her – never mind that it was her who left me (cause she had gone to see her pastor for counseling about my relationship with her – and can you believe it, this bastard who was married actually ended up seducing her and convincing her to leave me – CHRIST!! But that’s another story!!).

So like you, I thought that I was totally blameless, but there’s no accounting for human feelings – and especially female human feelings!! But that what is more important and remain is FRIENDSHIP - which still stays and is something that we all cherish.

And NOOOOO….. just in case y’all are wondering, RA and I never did anything more than have that soul clearing and heartfelt hug. Yeah, she stayed a bit more and we did a lot of talking which re-established the bonds D, RA and I had I had in days past.

As for your previous statement that you didn’t want to “re-open old wounds” well, the wound from 20 years ago is still festering in ALL OF YOU! Don’t for one moment think that Ching + Chong never, ever argued over the events of 20 years ago; and from what I can detect from your writings, the pain and the regret you’ve been living with for the past 20 years still very much remains in your psyche.

As you know, marriage per se is so difficult as it is already, and if you are the gentleman that I think you are, I would hope that you would think it IS your duty to assist your 2 friends in cementing their marriage….even if it means that they will forever consider you their common enemy….as a way of coping with the facts….as a way of ignoring the truth of the matter. But IMHO, when you do meet up with them, I really very seriously doubt that this will cause any further rancour in their marriage. It’s also something they need to bring out into the open, and …..treat properly once and for all.

I still say that you need to come totally clean with the daughter, explain in minute details like you did on here what happened and come up with a plan to meet up with her parents – YOUR GOOD FRIENDS!

I don’t for one minute (from reading all that you’ve written here only of course) think that you are the sort of guy who can or should turn away from difficult matters. You’re the type of guy who needs to confront it and do something about it.

And BTW – my opinion on your relationship with the young lady; this is so minor in comparison to the massive problem you, C + C have that it must be left on the back burner. You know that you’re a player and this girl is only just one of a string of others and is really of no significance when compared to the cancer that’s been festering between you and her parents.

You don’t take this one opportunity and you will forever regret it. Just my thinking of course – but I believe that things happen for a reason; what reason is there for you to chance upon their daughter of all the people you meet as a pilot travelling around all the time??

Just all IMHO and I also hope you do not take offense at what my suggestion is. I got lucky with RA and D, whilst you do need to bite the bullet if you do tackle Ching + Chong. But let me tell you, the result will be very satisfying and will cement your opinion of yourself as being a righteous gentleman.

SEAJ


Na bei bro...you sure know how to push my buttons...:o


I hear you bro...and also know you are right....but...


Ok, ok...I think I have time to think this over right? Like I said, I'll be in Melbourne soon...maybe give her a call and have a heart to heart with her first...then see how to involve her parents into a meet up later...this gives me a couple of weeks to seriously consider all possible permutations of outcome and fallout...


My feelings on this is not as hard-lined as you said though...doing the right things is good, but not always prudent and not always the best way to go...

I, and C & C, are already so-called one foot in the coffin type...while healing 20+ years of hurt will be great news...I'm not sure I want to chance another 20+ years of hurt for what I may or may not do today...

If we play out the non-encounter...they are blissfully oblivious to my existence (or re-entry into their lives) and they will likely live the same as they have been for so many years...happily or not, not withstanding...the girl is the only one hurt, which as much as it pains me...seems a normal part of life...even at my age, I get my share of heartaches from mis-selecting a partner (fucking case in point right, bro?)...she is a tough minded young lady...and I think she will move on from this and perhaps 'screw up' her next relationship, just like most of us go through as part of our growing up...and she will find her happiness herself...over time, she may hate, or miss me...but that is par for the course in life.

However...going down the route of a 'confrontation' brings about untold permutations and unknown reactions...not that I'm afraid to face them necessarily, bro...but because of the multiple unknown factor, we cannot logically work out the end game...and hence unable to device any strategy to deal with what may happen...yes bro...we can always hope for the best and plan for the worst...but in this case...I do not know what the worst is? Let's say, as one pm suggested to me...what if Ching kills herself over the shame of this being exposed to her children OR to the fact that she and her daughter have 'had' the same man? How shall I live with that? (as you rightly said bro...female feelings and reactions are a mystery to us men...)


Ok...it may not be so drama...but...because we do not know what the worst case scenario can be...I'm reluctant to start a process I will be powerless to stop or control, should it go terribly wrong...


Hope to hear your further thoughts bro...and thanks for bearing with me...


Cheers...

.

[Tazzymercs]

BRO!!!!!!!!!

i just realized this is what you know...lol asian remake of twlight breaking dawn part 1 and 2

lol you like the jacob hahaha wanna up belle ( ching ) but ching already with chong ( edward ) then you kena imprinted by the little girl half vampire....then when she grew up you up her liao wahahahaha KNN

like that also can link de...

hurry up with your " breaking dawn part 3 " leh lol dun hemm and haww liao lol ka kin! hahahaha :D

[SEAJ]

Na bei bro...you sure know how to push my buttons...:o


I hear you bro...and also know you are right....but...


Ok, ok...I think I have time to think this over right? Like I said, I'll be in Melbourne soon...maybe give her a call and have a heart to heart with her first...then see how to involve her parents into a meet up later...this gives me a couple of weeks to seriously consider all possible permutations of outcome and fallout...


My feelings on this is not as hard-lined as you said though...doing the right things is good, but not always prudent and not always the best way to go...

I, and C & C, are already so-called one foot in the coffin type...while healing 20+ years of hurt will be great news...I'm not sure I want to chance another 20+ years of hurt for what I may or may not do today...
Yes, of course you have time etc but you also know that to do or at least to TRY to do the best you can about the situation is a MUST! There's no avoiding it and it truly is high time that you do confront all the demons in your life. Karma, chance, whatever, but you are where you are right now as there IS a reason!!

Not always prudent/Not the best way to go?
Come on guy – there is no substitute for doing the right thing.

And yes, IMHO you must take the daughter into your full confidence; try to find out more about how C+C are these days and together with her, figure out what is the best way to approach them. After all, the daughter knows them intimately.



If we play out the non-encounter...they are blissfully oblivious to my existence (or re-entry into their lives) and they will likely live the same as they have been for so many years...happily or not, not withstanding...the girl is the only one hurt, which as much as it pains me...seems a normal part of life...even at my age, I get my share of heartaches from mis-selecting a partner (fucking case in point right, bro?)...she is a tough minded young lady...and I think she will move on from this and perhaps 'screw up' her next relationship, just like most of us go through as part of our growing up...and she will find her happiness herself...over time, she may hate, or miss me...but that is par for the course in life.

Blisfully oblivious to your existence …. WHILST for sure suffering from a mostly unspoken and deep-seated unhappiness. A painfully heavy albatross that they themselves have no power to remove from their hearts …and only you can do so. And don’t be so pessimistic as to the outcome of this approach! After all, your involvement in their unhappiness had NOT been set off by an active/purposeful act on your part; it just happened stupidly. And I would think that 20 years would be long enough for them to now not loose their temper as they had when it was a fresh wound. And for sure some maturity and common sense gained during the intervening years.
And you will have an important Ace in hand –the daughter!!


And BTW, I’d opine that your relationship with the daughter should and ought to take a back seat to the task at hand – this you must also discuss with her fully and for her to agree. After all, you 2 will be talking about something way more important than love affairs – which lets face it, happens all the time, not a big deal comparatively. Sure if it can be accommodated within this framework, fine and dandy, but it cannot take any prominence. You two should totally leave out the part about you 2 being romantically involved for now; that you did meet, just chatted as friends, put 2 and 2 together and discovered your ties to her parents etc. Not lying, just leave out the Romance part out as it will only complicate matters more.

However...going down the route of a 'confrontation' brings about untold permutations and unknown reactions...not that I'm afraid to face them necessarily, bro...but because of the multiple unknown factor, we cannot logically work out the end game...and hence unable to device any strategy to deal with what may happen...yes bro...we can always hope for the best and plan for the worst...but in this case...I do not know what the worst is? Let's say, as one pm suggested to me...what if Ching kills herself over the shame of this being exposed to her children OR to the fact that she and her daughter have 'had' the same man? How shall I live with that? (as you rightly said bro...female feelings and reactions are a mystery to us men...)


Ok...it may not be so drama...but...because we do not know what the worst case scenario can be...I'm reluctant to start a process I will be powerless to stop or control, should it go terribly wrong...
Thus the full and UNEQUIVOCAL cooperation of the daughter is very important; a daughter who I would think would place the happiness of her parents way over that of her own (convince her – LOL!) and a daughter who knows her own parents intimately and thus able to steer both of you towards a safe and good outcome.
Yes, definitely discuss with daughter (what IS her name anyway??? I’m getting tired of typing “daughter” out each time!!) ALL the possible permutations AND how to handle it all; I’d suggest even to the point of writing these things down and to practice handling such problems over and over again. You two are doing something serious and you both should handle it seriously….hopefully helping to convince C + C that you really have their best interest as THE ONLY thing that matters.


Hope to hear your further thoughts bro...and thanks for bearing with me...


Cheers...
And errr…. Thanks for bearing with MOI!!
You did say you want my further thoughts didn’t you? LOL!

Good luck bro
SEAJ

[Wizrd]

BRO!!!!!!!!!

i just realized this is what you know...lol asian remake of twlight breaking dawn part 1 and 2

lol you like the jacob hahaha wanna up belle ( ching ) but ching already with chong ( edward ) then you kena imprinted by the little girl half vampire....then when she grew up you up her liao wahahahaha KNN

like that also can link de...

hurry up with your " breaking dawn part 3 " leh lol dun hemm and haww liao lol ka kin! hahahaha


:eek:

Ning na buay eh....:rolleyes:

Bro...you know those nice people in white coats? And you remember them giving you a few packets of those pills? What they tell you bro is not a suggestion bro...you really must take those medication daily...ok bro? Please...take your medication hor? Now, that's a good boy.....;)

Na bei...like that also can anyhow link...your brain short circuit already lah...

When those nice guys in white coat come get you...please dont struggle bro...they are doing it for your benefit...ok? :D

Hahahaha...you are special bro...very special indeed...KNN...


Cheers bro...always a joy to read your thoughts...


.

[Wizrd]

Yes, of course you have time etc but you also know that to do or at least to TRY to do the best you can about the situation is a MUST! There's no avoiding it and it truly is high time that you do confront all the demons in your life. Karma, chance, whatever, but you are where you are right now as there IS a reason!!

............

And errr…. Thanks for bearing with MOI!!
You did say you want my further thoughts didn’t you? LOL!

Good luck bro
SEAJ


Wait bro...

I read your post a few times...let me clear up an idea I think you are suggesting...


....I should talk to her...Maybe or maybe not reveal the full truth to her...but give her enough info to initiate a meet up with C&C....

Then for the purpose of the meet up...make her out to be the intermediary for the meet instead of her having any relationship with me...

Hopefully, C&C are as forgiving as you suggest...all goes well...I get my 2 friends back...well, sort of...and even if it doesn't go as well, at least I tried...

Then she and I can decide how and in what way we continue our relationship...or not?


Hmmmmm...this might be workable...but how much to tell her and into how much details is something I need to think about...cannot have her get shocked and surprised when some details come out during the meet...so she must know and be ok that her mother and I had a past together...sexually...hmmm...a challenge...


What are your thoughts bro?


.

[SEAJ]

Wait bro...

I read your post a few times...let me clear up an idea I think you are suggesting...


....I should talk to her...Maybe or maybe not reveal the full truth to her...but give her enough info to initiate a meet up with C&C....

Then for the purpose of the meet up...make her out to be the intermediary for the meet instead of her having any relationship with me...

Hopefully, C&C are as forgiving as you suggest...all goes well...I get my 2 friends back...well, sort of...and even if it doesn't go as well, at least I tried...

Then she and I can decide how and in what way we continue our relationship...or not?


Hmmmmm...this might be workable...but how much to tell her and into how much details is something I need to think about...cannot have her get shocked and surprised when some details come out during the meet...so she must know and be ok that her mother and I had a past together...sexually...hmmm...a challenge...


What are your thoughts bro?


.
First and foremost you must enlist her to be totally on your side; and to do that IMHO you need be totally and fully honest with her.

The last thing you want to happen is if "The Daughter" (Christ, pls give me a name to write!!) gets blind-sided by anything you and C+C discusses; anything of significance that she did not know about/you did not disclose to her comes out in the meeting with C+C, she would feel betrayed, will totally be turned off by your "Lies" and you'd have all three of them reaching for your throat!

No, no, no - bro - this whole thing mainly happened because you originally withheld information you had deemed unimportant/insignificant; don't make the same mistake again.

And know that the daughter IS your ACE - an ace which must be totally on your side and which you can only accomplish if you are fully honest with her.

Make her out to be an "intermediary?" Are you mad? The conversation you are going to have with C+C is NOT going to be easy, plenty of hard truth and words are gonna be spoken - and for sure then C+C will figure out that you're now just merely using their daughter as an "intermediary??"
The same old selfish Wizrd who's only interest is himself.
Madness!!

SEAJ

Ps. And the BEST way to decide on a course of action is AFTER you've fully discussed the matter with daughter; you will find out most of the important details of C+C's lives now, how their relationship is now, how they've matured etc - all things which you AND DAUGHTER - will need to come up with a plan of action.
No use for you to get more suggestions here - just DO IT!
I mean go and discuss it thoroughly with daughter and decide on a plan of action with her.
Then as a TEAM, work towards a common goal of making HER parents happy.

[Wizrd]

First and foremost you must enlist her to be totally on your side; and to do that IMHO you need be totally and fully honest with her.

The last thing you want to happen is if "The Daughter" (Christ, pls give me a name to write!!) gets blind-sided by anything you and C+C discusses; anything of significance that she did not know about/you did not disclose to her comes out in the meeting with C+C, she would feel betrayed, will totally be turned off by your "Lies" and you'd have all three of them reaching for your throat!

No, no, no - bro - this whole thing mainly happened because you originally withheld information you had deemed unimportant/insignificant; don't make the same mistake again.

And know that the daughter IS your ACE - an ace which must be totally on your side and which you can only accomplish if you are fully honest with her.

Make her out to be an "intermediary?" Are you mad? The conversation you are going to have with C+C is NOT going to be easy, plenty of hard truth and words are gonna be spoken - and for sure then C+C will figure out that you're now just merely using their daughter as an "intermediary??"
The same old selfish Wizrd who's only interest is himself.
Madness!!

SEAJ

Ps. And the BEST way to decide on a course of action is AFTER you've fully discussed the matter with daughter; you will find out most of the important details of C+C's lives now, how their relationship is now, how they've matured etc - all things which you AND DAUGHTER - will need to come up with a plan of action.
No use for you to get more suggestions here - just DO IT!
I mean go and discuss it thoroughly with daughter and decide on a plan of action with her.
Then as a TEAM, work towards a common goal of making HER parents happy.


Ok bro...I understand what you mean now...


It's not going to happen then bro...


Firstly, I do not know how to tell her about her mother And me...maybe if she and I had been together for a few months or years, I can slowly tell her...but 6-7 days is not enough to give me immunity...


Secondly...Ching may really kill herself...I chose another woman instead of her, which prompted the first outburst...now I'm choosing her daughter over her again...I'm not doing it bro...it is a lose lose for me and my conscience is not worth the shit the body and mind has to deal with...


Thirdly...assuming these two women are strong enough to handle the truth...what about Chong?


Let me ask you bro...lets say you just found a girlfriend...someone you adore in a very short time...and thinking of introducing her to your family...then out of the blue...she tells you she used to bang your father...and can you please help to fix it so that she and your father can now be friends??? What do you think your reaction will be??? And...what do you think your father's reaction will be???
(Can't speak for you bro, but I know what my reaction would be...why the fuck did you tell me?? And no fucking way in hell will I help...you just want to bang him again right?...would be my reaction...)


It is precisely because I am not mad that I decided on the MIA option bro...


Thanks but its a no go bro...


Cheers...


.

[CptCum]

First and foremost you must enlist her to be totally on your side; and to do that IMHO you need be totally and fully honest with her.

The last thing you want to happen is if "The Daughter" (Christ, pls give me a name to write!!) gets blind-sided by anything you and C+C discusses; anything of significance that she did not know about/you did not disclose to her comes out in the meeting with C+C, she would feel betrayed, will totally be turned off by your "Lies" and you'd have all three of them reaching for your throat!

No, no, no - bro - this whole thing mainly happened because you originally withheld information you had deemed unimportant/insignificant; don't make the same mistake again.

And know that the daughter IS your ACE - an ace which must be totally on your side and which you can only accomplish if you are fully honest with her.

Make her out to be an "intermediary?" Are you mad? The conversation you are going to have with C+C is NOT going to be easy, plenty of hard truth and words are gonna be spoken - and for sure then C+C will figure out that you're now just merely using their daughter as an "intermediary??"
The same old selfish Wizrd who's only interest is himself.
Madness!!

SEAJ

Ps. And the BEST way to decide on a course of action is AFTER you've fully discussed the matter with daughter; you will find out most of the important details of C+C's lives now, how their relationship is now, how they've matured etc - all things which you AND DAUGHTER - will need to come up with a plan of action.
No use for you to get more suggestions here - just DO IT!
I mean go and discuss it thoroughly with daughter and decide on a plan of action with her.
Then as a TEAM, work towards a common goal of making HER parents happy.


bro SEAJ...return ups u +9!!!

[SEAJ]

Ok Bro – it’s of course your own life and naturally, your own choice; but I really don’t think that this course of action you’re contemplating is the best way…certainly not for anybody with a bit of gumption and sense of decency. Sorry, just MY own, probably very cloistered-view POV

Ok bro...I understand what you mean now...

It's not going to happen then bro...

Firstly, I do not know how to tell her about her mother And me...maybe if she and I had been together for a few months or years, I can slowly tell her...but 6-7 days is not enough to give me immunity...
To me the whole thing has got very little to do with you and the daughter, all to do with your obligation as a friend AND what I would assume would be the daughter’s filial duty to her parents; that she SHOULD be very concerned with the well being of her parents.

Secondly...Ching may really kill herself...I chose another woman instead of her, which prompted the first outburst...now I'm choosing her daughter over her again...I'm not doing it bro...it is a lose lose for me and my conscience is not worth the shit the body and mind has to deal with...
This is where the discussion you must have with daughter is essential and central to the plan. This is when telling her the whole truth of the matter is not only crucial, but it is THE opportunity for you to fully let her understand your concerns about how the BOTH of you must handle the situation.

Like I suggested, your affair with daughter MUST be at the back burner and you must convince her that for the sake of her parents, her filial duty, she must also just forget it for the moment. Just let it be that you just accidentally met and became just regular friends, when by accident you discovered who she really is.

Thirdly...assuming these two women are strong enough to handle the truth...what about Chong?
Chong – yes, the stoic, dependable as the day is long Chong. I of course ALSO don’t know how he would handle this; but I AM thinking that after 20 years, all of us matures and mellow down. Plus note the fact that the marriage HAS lasted this long….well… whatever happened 20 years ago had NOT led to the breakdown of their marriage. And especially when the daughter is now involved with trying to put things straight –I would think that that the loving/responsible father that Chong SHOULD be, would able to hold his temper.

Let me ask you bro...lets say you just found a girlfriend...someone you adore in a very short time...and thinking of introducing her to your family...then out of the blue...she tells you she used to bang your father...and can you please help to fix it so that she and your father can now be friends??? What do you think your reaction will be??? And...what do you think your father's reaction will be???
(Can't speak for you bro, but I know what my reaction would be...why the fuck did you tell me?? And no fucking way in hell will I help...you just want to bang him again right?...would be my reaction...)
This situation…. Has actually happened in at least a couple of famous families in Hong Kong!!!. I Swear!! And these marriages have lasted up to now!!
But your scenario is not an analogy of your own situation. The girl screwing the father in law did NOT cause any rancour in the family of the F.I.L. Something which I am counting on the daughter, to take up to make things better in her own family.


It is precisely because I am not mad that I decided on the MIA option bro...
Thanks but its a no go bro...
Cheers...
.
But again it is of course your own life, your own decision and either way you decide – I just wish you luck that you will find the peace-of-mind that I think you really want.

SEAJ

[SEAJ]

bro SEAJ...return ups u +9!!!

Thanks bro!

SEAJ

[tcrecruit]

I'm sure you know what you want and what u plan to do... Don't keep us campers waiting too long... It's cold out there in da jungle while the bonfire is fading....

[Wizrd]

Ok Bro – it’s of course your own life and naturally, your own choice; but I really don’t think that this course of action you’re contemplating is the best way…certainly not for anybody with a bit of gumption and sense of decency. Sorry, just MY own, probably very cloistered-view POV

SEAJ


Thanks bro...I think I know how to move forward in this case...thanks for your insight and encouragement...


For all your efforts, I feel I need to give you my take even though I know you do not agree with it...and while I can just simply agree with you here to get you ' off my back'... I think you deserve better...


The truth of the matter is...having no contact for more than 20+ years...although I was initially excited at your suggestion...to rekindle this friendship, and as much I still have some sentimental inkling for it; it has not been in my life for so long that it is seriously very low on my list of priorities....
This does not mean I do not value Chong as my friend, but that was another time and another place...for now, I rather put effort into my present friendships, many of whom have been in my life this recent 20+ years...


Of course, I will never say no to more friends, but the amount of drama to get this one back is not worth the risk of all possible downside...


The daughter, lets call her Chang...has her own life now...and should not, for a man she has been with for less than 2 weeks, have her life turned upside down and perhaps crashed in on her...and then, she is suppose to help this man get back into her family...causing unknown grief to people she actually love, and to herself...all for what? To be perfectly honest...and if I should be called a bastard, then so be it...but after finding out who she is...I'm not sure I can sleep with her again (she will likely feel the same once she knows the truth)...so at best, she will go through all the shit for a new friend, or at worst, doing it for an uncle she once had sex with...not really urgently-needed, top priority stuff in her life right now.


I don't know why but most guys here or through pm, think I should marry her or hint at marriage eventually...but most women are telling me to leave the poor girl alone...and I tend to think the women know what a female would prefer...I am NEVER getting married again...not even with the goddess of the most erotic plus most tender love...


Perhaps you are right that this sort of things happens with other families. Bro, I know I'm a pretty open minded guy...and have done things most normal couples wouldn't dream of trying...(I once had a swing with a couple and his first cousin...a swing with a couple and her sister etc...) but mother and daughter is not something even I can accept as a normal daily thing...maybe I need a few more years to get sicker in the mind before I can be excited at having done a mother and daughter combo...


Alrighty bro...there it is...maybe you're disappointed in me...but I cannot do what you think is right...it feels all wrong to me...I know a way to get her home address and will write her a snail mail dear Jane letter...without giving her any facts, make an excuse to not see her again...hopefully, she can put the past with me behind her...

This episode was a mistake...whoever is to blame...but having that knowledge now that I made a mistake, then to go boldly in to stir up unknown amount of shit as I go, with a family who may have settled into a normal routine after 20+ years, just so I can feel better (which incidentally, I will not feel better at all, even if Chong hugs me and tells me I am still his best friend...plus I still have face Ching and Chang...)...it would be an inexcusably mindless, reckless and bastardly thing to even attempt...many have suggested that I leave the girl alone, and that, I believe is the most correct course of action...


Cheers bro...with my deepest respect to you...

,

[Wizrd]

I'm sure you know what you want and what u plan to do... Don't keep us campers waiting too long... It's cold out there in da jungle while the bonfire is fading....


Hahaha...thanks bro for hanging around the camp site....

Huh? Cold?? :confused: what happened to the fire that sis asdfghjkl started??
Aiya...must stoke the fire once in a while ma...

Yes...as stated above...

I'm going to snail mail her, giving her some excuse of why I can't be with her anymore...and hope she'll get over this quickly...

Thanks all for reading and helping...peace...


Cheers...


.

[Spud_Boy]

from what began as a story has now evolved to a sharing session...

bro Wizrd, since u have gathered all the info & made ur decision, then u just have to bit the bullet & carry out what u deemed as the direction u decide to go..

as for Chang, think writing the letter sounds a better option than totally MIA & leave her hanging there.. shows the responsibility for u as a person & the respect u have for her as well..

most imptly, i know it sounds cliche...

不在乎天长地久，只在乎曾经拥有

from all this melodrama & u having to go thru ur past, means u have also put in feelings into this r/s, even how much the player u may be.. so no need to feel too guilty abt it.. maybe it's just not meant to be at this moment in time..

[Wizrd]

from what began as a story has now evolved to a sharing session...

bro Wizrd, since u have gathered all the info & made ur decision, then u just have to bit the bullet & carry out what u deemed as the direction u decide to go..

as for Chang, think writing the letter sounds a better option than totally MIA & leave her hanging there.. shows the responsibility for u as a person & the respect u have for her as well..

most imptly, i know it sounds cliche...

不在乎天长地久，只在乎曾经拥有

from all this melodrama & u having to go thru ur past, means u have also put in feelings into this r/s, even how much the player u may be.. so no need to feel too guilty abt it.. maybe it's just not meant to be at this moment in time..


Thanks bro...

I have started writing the snail mail already...and for sure...I'm going to use the cliche line you put here...it describes almost perfectly how I feel actually...:)

She is a very special woman...but for now, I'm not sure if my feelings for her is more as a man or it's more paternal...anyhow...she should move on too...

Cheers bro...


.

[ludwig19]

Now that we are done with sharing opinions, can we now get on with the rest of the story? Or has it ended already haha

[alan10]

TS, I just came across your story....certainly has its heart-wrenching moments.

My advice if I may offer it - MIA from the daughter, for her own sake. I'm sure time will heal her heart, and she will move on.....

As for re-establishing contact with the C&C, I think this is not the time yet; my gut feel is probably when u all are in the sixties, with one foot in the grave...people would probably be more forgiving then.

[Wizrd]

Now that we are done with sharing opinions, can we now get on with the rest of the story? Or has it ended already haha


Hahaha bro...

If you want more then obviously I'll have to write more....but this story is done bro...earlier next time ok? :D

Cheers...

.

[Wizrd]

TS, I just came across your story....certainly has its heart-wrenching moments.

My advice if I may offer it - MIA from the daughter, for her own sake. I'm sure time will heal her heart, and she will move on.....

As for re-establishing contact with the C&C, I think this is not the time yet; my gut feel is probably when u all are in the sixties, with one foot in the grave...people would probably be more forgiving then.


Thanks bro...and for the upzz too...

Yup...exactly my thoughts too..

Cheers bro...


.

[Tazzymercs]

heh

finish liao


who to troll

sian

sian


sad

ok hart liao

rak te do leh mai dai

[Wizrd]

heh

finish liao


who to troll

sian

sian


sad

ok hart liao

rak te do leh mai dai


Ah ha...you finally come back here...na bei...die go where?:mad:


Hmmmm bro...forgot your medication again right? :rolleyes:

Ok ok...no worries...bro..go sit down in the corner first ok? Kor Kor need to go call the hospital for you ok? Hey, stop playing with scissors...and put down the toaster...KNN...

:D

Cheers bro...

.

[Tazzymercs]

lol medication or not your post is my medication leh KNN lol

now no more liao sian liao le loh...

btw your snail mail how? share the contents abit here abit there leh..then we can throughly discuss on how to rub salt, vinegar pus dettol and some alchol swab on the wounds that you are licking leh hahahaha

you best liao le lo..ching chong chang...make me have to re read very tiring de leh in between reading and sending resume to non responsive employers hahahaha

toaster is for mid night snacking while camping for your stories leh lol i camp at my bed room de lol

[SEAJ]

Thanks bro...I think I .............
For all your efforts, I feel I need to give you my take even though I know you do not agree with it...and while I can just simply agree with you here to get you ' off my back'... I think you deserve better...


The truth of the matter is................ and that, I believe is the most correct course of action...


Cheers bro...with my deepest respect to you...

,
And my equal amount of respect to you...and thanks for taking the trouble to explain. Hope it also helps to soothe your own troubled thoughts on the whole matter.

I am but a faceless observer commenting and suggesting things on a matter which I really do NOT have a full grasp on; only you know all the twists and turns and ultimately, it must be your own decision.

In any case, my best wishes to you, whatever course of action you now take.

And my thanks to you for sharing your saga(s) with us here; excellent story telling and writing skills.

Kudos!

SEAJ

[SammyNewbie]

I actually want to hear you tell your tale in more detail about how you slowly seduced his daughter and yeah the steamy steamy sex involved, along with the semi romance plot going on before it leads to the shock.:o

Actually if your story is written properly and in more detail and turned into a novel. It can make ALOT of money... I think alot of people will like it.;)

[Wizrd]

lol medication or not your post is my medication leh KNN lol

now no more liao sian liao le loh...

btw your snail mail how? share the contents abit here abit there leh..then we can throughly discuss on how to rub salt, vinegar pus dettol and some alchol swab on the wounds that you are licking leh hahahaha

you best liao le lo..ching chong chang...make me have to re read very tiring de leh in between reading and sending resume to non responsive employers hahahaha

toaster is for mid night snacking while camping for your stories leh lol i camp at my bed room de lol

Hahaha...Aiya bro...you no hope liao lah...hide in your bedroom how to impress employers? Haiz...(make sure you disclose your mental illness past hor...hiding it will come back to bite your arse on your first day at work one...)

Yeah, ok...you can read my other threads for now...until I have new adventure, nothing much to write about lah...settle one case at a time ok? (Please double check ok...don't accidentally put Ching Chong or Chang in your résumé hor...)

Ehh...you damn kaypoh leh...my snail mail nothing much...usual dear Jane letter type...how nice she is...how much I like her...why we cannot be together...maybe if fate is willing, we'll meet again...blah blah blah...if I may say so myself...quite touching...I'm still not happy with my reason but think it's realistic enough...so I think can work...overall quite from the heart...


Hey...alamak...toaster is for bread hor...don't put Maggie mee inside...can start fire one like that...na bei...


:D

.

[Wizrd]

And my equal amount of respect to you...and thanks for taking the trouble to explain. Hope it also helps to soothe your own troubled thoughts on the whole matter.

I am but a faceless observer commenting and suggesting things on a matter which I really do NOT have a full grasp on; only you know all the twists and turns and ultimately, it must be your own decision.

In any case, my best wishes to you, whatever course of action you now take.

And my thanks to you for sharing your saga(s) with us here; excellent story telling and writing skills.

Kudos!

SEAJ


Thanks bro...

Really heart felt thanks...:)


Cheers...


.

[Wizrd]

I actually want to hear you tell your tale in more detail about how you slowly seduced his daughter and yeah the steamy steamy sex involved, along with the semi romance plot going on before it leads to the shock.:o

Actually if your story is written properly and in more detail and turned into a novel. It can make ALOT of money... I think alot of people will like it.;)


Hahaha bro...thanks for that...

I am in the middle of writing a book...but not as steamy as you suggest...now I am thinking of what you said and may add some (or a lot of) sex in...

But....

From what I know...books do not make as much money as people think...can only be a hobby I think....unless you know publishers who knows otherwise..

Cheers bro...


.

[TempLust]

Kept my opinion to myself right till the end. Not commanding lah but just don't like jumping to conclusions.

At all those different crossroads with Chong and Ching. You pick and chosed what you had to. I don't see anything wrong with it.

Between devil and the deep blue sea. You had to make a choice that in your opinon was the lesser evil. Nothing wrong, I would had chosen the same path given that I have the hindsight that I have now. You had dealt with it the best way that you can. I would had done exactly the same. Hahhahhahhaaa.

As for the girl....you have your own answer below. Can't you read the fucking contradiction ? Hahahhaaaa.


I don't know bro...I'm still considering just writing to her in a way that she cannot reply type....but I'm still hurt by what Ching did to me...apologising without giving me a chance to express my own opinion...why to it back to her daughter...

.

You want to write to her when you yourself cldn't stand the "sorry" letter from Ching ? Aren't you doing the same to her daughter ? Funny lah you.

Break ups are about closure. Do it properly and each can move on. You done it badly with Ching so don't do the same to her daughter. Both times you are non-committal and that's what fucks them up.

Go Melbourne. Meet up with her. Tell her why you cannot see her any more. That's the plot. As for the story line and BS that you can give her to help her get a closure.

[Rickey]

Hahaha bro...

I am in the middle of writing a book...but not as steamy as you suggest...now I am thinking of what you said and may add some (or a lot of) sex in...

But....

From what I know...books do not make as much money as people think...can only be a hobby I think....unless you know publishers who knows otherwise..

Cheers bro...


.

Oh, wow !..my good fren, bro Wizrd, is gonna write a book which every1 shd enjoy reading.. Look forward to reading it !...:)

[Tazzymercs]

Ehh...you damn kaypoh leh...my snail mail nothing much...usual dear Jane letter type...how nice she is...how much I like her...why we cannot be together...maybe if fate is willing, we'll meet again...blah blah blah...if I may say so myself...quite touching...I'm still not happy with my reason but think it's realistic enough...so I think can work...overall quite from the heart....

eh you very corny leh....very (meat numb)hahahahaha what fate la what cannot be together la...lol you act TVB si bo lol

arh bo you should say ma...dear chang...im sorry...we are like liang shan bo and ju yin tai like that must be seperated..reasons are that cannot be said..blah blah blah..more drama...make her cry ma...

for some perverse reason for me..if i cannot get the girl for whatsoever reason hor...lol i must make her remember me by making her cry then i more guam lan hahahaha....like that i feel a bit worth my time spent though wasted la...

想要把你忘记真的好难
思念的痛在我心里纠缠
朝朝暮暮的期盼
永远没有答案

站在天平的两端一样的为难
唯一的答案
爱一个人好难

[Wizrd]

Kept my opinion to myself right till the end. Not commanding lah but just don't like jumping to conclusions.

At all those different crossroads with Chong and Ching. You pick and chosed what you had to. I don't see anything wrong with it.

Between devil and the deep blue sea. You had to make a choice that in your opinon was the lesser evil. Nothing wrong, I would had chosen the same path given that I have the hindsight that I have now. You had dealt with it the best way that you can. I would had done exactly the same. Hahhahhahhaaa.

As for the girl....you have your own answer below. Can't you read the fucking contradiction ? Hahahhaaaa.



You want to write to her when you yourself cldn't stand the "sorry" letter from Ching ? Aren't you doing the same to her daughter ? Funny lah you.

Break ups are about closure. Do it properly and each can move on. You done it badly with Ching so don't do the same to her daughter. Both times you are non-committal and that's what fucks them up.

Go Melbourne. Meet up with her. Tell her why you cannot see her any more. That's the plot. As for the story line and BS that you can give her to help her get a closure.


Thanks bro...

As much as I hate to admit it...you are dead right...it has been my feeling too but it just seem easier to avoid a confrontation...

But when you are right bro, you are right...

Ok, I haven't sent the snail mail yet...and my trip to Melbourne is merely 3 weeks away...I think I will call her...buy her a ticket to come over for a weekend...and have a face to face breakup with her...

Of course, she must never know the real reason...but I shall provide her with a no-room-to-manoeuvre excuse...and she can hit me if it makes her feel better...

With luck...she can get it out of her system and have closure...and I can have closure too...

That should do the trick...

Cheers bro...

.

[Wizrd]

Oh, wow !..my good fren, bro Wizrd, is gonna write a book which every1 shd enjoy reading.. Look forward to reading it !...:)


Haha bro...thanks...:)

Will update you when I finish writing...I'm on chapter 8 now and I think it's about one third way through...

Thanks for the support bro...

Cheers...


.

[SammyNewbie]

Please remember to share if you get great breakup angry sex;)

[Wizrd]

eh you very corny leh....very (meat numb)hahahahaha what fate la what cannot be together la...lol you act TVB si bo lol

arh bo you should say ma...dear chang...im sorry...we are like liang shan bo and ju yin tai like that must be seperated..reasons are that cannot be said..blah blah blah..more drama...make her cry ma...

for some perverse reason for me..if i cannot get the girl for whatsoever reason hor...lol i must make her remember me by making her cry then i more guam lan hahahaha....like that i feel a bit worth my time spent though wasted la...

想要把你忘记真的好难
思念的痛在我心里纠缠
朝朝暮暮的期盼
永远没有答案

站在天平的两端一样的为难
唯一的答案
爱一个人好难


:eek: :eek:

KNNBMNHFDKLCF...&@£%#*+€¥=^<

Now sing song some more?!?!?!?!

Na bei...maybe dosage not enough....:rolleyes:


Meat numb?? I'll make you head numb soon...

NKC...you not meat numb...yeah, you expert at breaking up with girls...with your résumé writing experience, you write the dear Jane letter for me lah...


But no choice lah bro...women like meat numb stuff mah...better give her what she likes since its my fault plus I'm the break upper...she is the poor break uppee and deserves some manly meat numb letter...can or not??

Plus...I not pro at losing women like you leh...during breakups...if the woman don't try to kill me, I already thank sky thank ground already...making her walk away willingly is more important to me then making her cry...

Anyway...I have a few weeks to device a face to face meeting...and may post here to wrap up the saga...

But for you bro...medication, medication, medication...:D


Cheers bro...


.

[Sapphirez]

LOL. its like those taiwanese drama where those impossible coincidence happen.

[Wizrd]

LOL. its like those taiwanese drama where those impossible coincidence happen.


Yeah lor sis...:o

Sorry about that but that bro Tazzymercs refuse to take his medication leh...what to do...so become like Taiwanese drama lor...:(

Really sis, normally not so bad one...when he takes his medicines, he doesn't anyhow sing and anyhow link stories...a bit more like Japanese drama, and not Taiwanese...but hor, if he takes too much, then also trouble liao...anyhow cry lah, throw tantrum lah...then become like Korean drama...haiz...

Talked to his doctors before, but the hospital don't dare to accept him also...don't know what else to do...so we all have to live with it even though like Taiwanese drama lor...

Forgive him ok sis? He knows not what he does...


Thanks...:D


.

[Wizrd]

Please remember to share if you get great breakup angry sex;)


Hey bro...

Wah...sneaked your post in there...didn't even see it last night...paiseh...

Thanks bro but that's not going to happen...I need to keep away from her sexually...too easy to become addicted...:o

Cheers bro...

.

[SammyNewbie]

As the Merovigan would say if it happens 'You see? He's just a man'

Oh well I guess I will have to wait until you publish your book.:D

I'm bumming a lot cause I'm looking for a job, and I still haven't done my math homework due soon. Hence my ability to roam the forums all day. :o

[chenzong]

Ok, I haven't sent the snail mail yet...and my trip to Melbourne is merely 3 weeks away...I think I will call her...buy her a ticket to come over for a weekend...and have a face to face breakup with her...


Personally, I feel that it is not safe to meet up face-to-face. I'm not sure about a kid that grew up in Oz, but my experience with Chinese women told me that emotionally charged women are crazy. The snail mail should do the trick. Just let it go and perhaps avoid business in Melbourne for a while.

And DO NOT send your snail mail out of Singapore! Send it from another country, and let her think you are living there!

[Tazzymercs]

LOL. its like those taiwanese drama where those impossible coincidence happen.

HELLO its talking about you la mr manly meat numb KNN lol is your impossible coincidence..meeting with chang ended up knowing chang is ching chong's daughter..not my post WEAK!!!!!!!!!!!

beside you wan buy ticket for her to come sg....bro think twice..

1) later she cannot take it go crazy threaten to jump/kill....how you gonna explain to her parents your good friends

2) when you announce break up...is she gonna get console from you who initiated the break up or is she gonna be alone..then go drink get wasted...kena rape/banged by other ppl and then begin her demise..with you partly responsible..

3) when you initiate break up you gonna leave her alone or gonna fuck her?

3.1) if you leave her alone...1) and 2) may occur then how...

3.2) if you gonna fuck her...will you give her the feeling that you will still consider her or fuck her for the sake of fucking? if you wan an intimate session with her after break up...bro i think you will give her false hope which i dun forsee down in the recent future that you gonna uphold..you being very bastard lo....

you think again if you wan to buy her a ticket for her to come over not lo..so far the cons weight much heavily then the pros...

if you were to fly there tell her..still ok as she still got emotion support her friends/FB/family/close friends blah..if here...maybe she all alone....

well..worst come to worst..intro her to me..i help give comfort after you break up with her in local soil lol then my turn to post fr :P

1 home cheap..two home gain no wahahahaha

[hknight2013]

After reading through your story and the comments by the others, I have formed my humble opinion.

It seems that you already know what to do and have done that, which is to disappear from her life and fade off. So why the need to send her the snail mail. You have already MIA for some time now and she has probably gotten over the hurt. Now, u want to send her a mail and explain why u cannot continue to see her? This will stir things up for her again. Not to mention you considering flying her to sg.

Some of your thoughts and actions reminds me of my own good friend years ago. He was breaking up with his girlfriend. However he insisted on seeing her one last time. While he waited to meet her, I chatted with him a few times. I asked him since you guys already break up, why want to meet up? He always said that he just want to say how sorry he was as it was his fault that their relationship had to come to an end. In my heart, I didn't believe him. I finally got the reason from him the night before he was supposed to meet her. As expected, there was only one reason, one last fuck.

I am not saying that u want to do that but it seems to me that u are the one that needed closure. u don't seem to want to take this opportunity to make up with your once upon a time good buddy. So why need to write to the poor girl. MIA, already done, leave her alone, let her live her life from here on, no need to explain, u didn't see this as a long term relationship anyway. Why care about who her dad is? Unless u want to meet her dad. U already made your choice, so stick by it. Leave the poor girl some peace and some imagination. Yes she will be wondering what happened to u, but that's better than receiving a letter from u with some half fuck reason.

Sorry so long winded. Cheers.

[tripleaxe]

After reading through your story and the comments by the others, I have formed my humble opinion.

It seems that you already know what to do and have done that, which is to disappear from her life and fade off. So why the need to send her the snail mail. You have already MIA for some time now and she has probably gotten over the hurt. Now, u want to send her a mail and explain why u cannot continue to see her? This will stir things up for her again. Not to mention you considering flying her to sg.

Some of your thoughts and actions reminds me of my own good friend years ago. He was breaking up with his girlfriend. However he insisted on seeing her one last time. While he waited to meet her, I chatted with him a few times. I asked him since you guys already break up, why want to meet up? He always said that he just want to say how sorry he was as it was his fault that their relationship had to come to an end. In my heart, I didn't believe him. I finally got the reason from him the night before he was supposed to meet her. As expected, there was only one reason, one last fuck.

I am not saying that u want to do that but it seems to me that u are the one that needed closure. u don't seem to want to take this opportunity to make up with your once upon a time good buddy. So why need to write to the poor girl. MIA, already done, leave her alone, let her live her life from here on, no need to explain, u didn't see this as a long term relationship anyway. Why care about who her dad is? Unless u want to meet her dad. U already made your choice, so stick by it. Leave the poor girl some peace and some imagination. Yes she will be wondering what happened to u, but that's better than receiving a letter from u with some half fuck reason.

Sorry so long winded. Cheers.



Very well said

[tripleaxe]

Wizrd, word of advice, however noble your intention is, since you MIA sometime, just forget the whole thing.

What you are doing now is creating future trouble. You think the best outcome you can hope for is she can realise the situation & move on happily without you, honestly what do you think will happen. Feelings will be stirred!

Come on, be sensible, at your age can become grandfather already.
Ask yourself Why are you doing this? Is it really for her? Or for yourself.

Samsters cheering you to contact her only care about reading what will happen and about you getting some action like some kind of a novel. They don't care about her.

If you truly care for your friend's daughter, let her go.

[Wizrd]

HELLO its talking about you la mr manly meat numb KNN lol is your impossible coincidence..meeting with chang ended up knowing chang is ching chong's daughter..not my post WEAK!!!!!!!!!!!


:confused: Huh?? Is it? Like that meh? *scratch head* no ah....she posted directly below my reply to your lack-of-medicine moment...never quote me what....must be talking about you lah...ehh...you taiwanese right? Sing Chinese song some more...:rolleyes:




beside you wan buy ticket for her to come sg....bro think twice..

1) later she cannot take it go crazy threaten to jump/kill....how you gonna explain to her parents your good friends

2) when you announce break up...is she gonna get console from you who initiated the break up or is she gonna be alone..then go drink get wasted...kena rape/banged by other ppl and then begin her demise..with you partly responsible..

3) when you initiate break up you gonna leave her alone or gonna fuck her?

3.1) if you leave her alone...1) and 2) may occur then how...

Bro...your brain numb is it? Will never bring her to Sg lah...I meant bring her to Melbourne...

Nevertheless, gravity in Melbourne same as Sg...so jumping is of equal concern...even though she seemed very stable to me, one never knows....hmmmm...must rethink plan liao lor....haiz...



3.2) if you gonna fuck her...will you give her the feeling that you will still consider her or fuck her for the sake of fucking? if you wan an intimate session with her after break up...bro i think you will give her false hope which i dun forsee down in the recent future that you gonna uphold..you being very bastard lo....

you think again if you wan to buy her a ticket for her to come over not lo..so far the cons weight much heavily then the pros...

if you were to fly there tell her..still ok as she still got emotion support her friends/FB/family/close friends blah..if here...maybe she all alone....

well..worst come to worst..intro her to me..i help give comfort after you break up with her in local soil lol then my turn to post fr :P

1 home cheap..two home gain no wahahahaha


KNN...you not only brain numb...heart numb also...still thinking about sex in this time...bro...you no hope already lah...:mad:

Fucker lah you...ask for help and you happy happy help yourself hor...good...next time you better check properly...your medicine may suddenly, accidentally become lau sai medicine hor...then we hide the toilet paper at the camp site...see how you tahan...


Go sing song lah you...Na bei


:D
.

[Wizrd]

Personally, I feel that it is not safe to meet up face-to-face.

After reading through your story and the comments by the others, I have formed my humble opinion.


Wizrd, word of advice, however noble your intention is, since you MIA sometime, just forget the whole thing.


Alrighty bros...

Thanks so much for your input...I agree with all of you...

My original plan was to just go MIA...

Many pm suggested that I give the girl some closure but most sis say to leave her alone...and that gels with what you guys are saying..

I can see where some bros are coming from about doing the right thing by not letting her just hang...I understand that too...

As stated, there is still a few weeks before my trip so I haven't made any plans for her yet...already written the snail mail...and strangely, after writing, it actually gave me my closure already...I do not think I will even send it..

I am leaning towards leaving things as is....to reopen the wound will do neither of us any good...but I am still feeling guilty for leaving her in the dark...
However, in the next couple of weeks, my resolve will surely strengthen and I'll be content to leave things well enough alone.


Thanks for the wake up call guys...



Cheers...


.

[Wizrd]

As the Merovigan would say if it happens 'You see? He's just a man'

Oh well I guess I will have to wait until you publish your book.:D

I'm bumming a lot cause I'm looking for a job, and I still haven't done my math homework due soon. Hence my ability to roam the forums all day. :o


Thanks bro...

Hahaha...thanks...and that you mentioned my book gave me an idea...I better go hook a new woman to add to my story...which will also help me to stop thinking about this issue too much...

Thanks for the inspiration...

You looking a job too? why not join force with bro Ta...ok...forget it...he a bit 13 points and not very stable these days...not a good idea...(if you see anyone carrying his toaster around, Siam ASAP....) :D...let his brain unnumb first then we talk about it again...



Cheers bro...

.

[Tazzymercs]

NNB lol

actually think about it lo...u just left like that no closure de...if you in the girl shoe you will sure think..NNBCCB...fuck me liao promise me to meet my parents..then leave me hanging...i deserve this meh...

well...i duno about you la...but if the girl wans explanation....you sure must give de....then do your closure lo....

one man meat is another man poison de ma...your poison maybe my meat leh..hahahahaha anyway i'll pretend that im you lo to meet the parents swee bo...lol

KNN im not taiwanese lo singaporean cannot sing chinese...must sing what...oh...

It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do
To look you in the eye
And tell you I don't love you
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to lie
To show no emotion when you start to cry
I can't let you see what you mean to me
When my hands are tied and my heart's not free
We're not meant to be
It's the hardest thing I'll ever had to do
To turn around and walk away
Pretending I don't love you

KNN how to carry toaster ard >.< wan carry also portable bunsen burner...and a metal plate ma to BBQ hahahaha CB!

ok la leave her alone or not actually is her decision de..why not msg her ask her how is she..then if she like never ask much then move on lo silent closure..if she becomes hysterical...hohohoho....i can pass some med to her lol sedate her....

no la actually this type of things varies from girls to girls...if she is truly concern about you and you suddenly mia...she will worry much no? when you like a person or rather even love a person that much and suddenly that person mia..you will also feel worried..anxiety and stuff de ma..later she fell into depression how..

actually just send her a text saying that you will be back in aussie then from then see what she says..if she not concern liao then good for you lo..but if she is..i think you do owe her an explanation de

[lim07]

NNB lol

actually think about it lo...u just left like that no closure de...if you in the girl shoe you will sure think..NNBCCB...fuck me liao promise me to meet my parents..then leave me hanging...i deserve this meh...

well...i duno about you la...but if the girl wans explanation....you sure must give de....then do your closure lo....

one man meat is another man poison de ma...your poison maybe my meat leh..hahahahaha anyway i'll pretend that im you lo to meet the parents swee bo...lol

KNN im not taiwanese lo singaporean cannot sing chinese...must sing what...oh...

It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do
To look you in the eye
And tell you I don't love you
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to lie
To show no emotion when you start to cry
I can't let you see what you mean to me
When my hands are tied and my heart's not free
We're not meant to be
It's the hardest thing I'll ever had to do
To turn around and walk away
Pretending I don't love you

KNN how to carry toaster ard >.< wan carry also portable bunsen burner...and a metal plate ma to BBQ hahahaha CB!

ok la leave her alone or not actually is her decision de..why not msg her ask her how is she..then if she like never ask much then move on lo silent closure..if she becomes hysterical...hohohoho....i can pass some med to her lol sedate her....

no la actually this type of things varies from girls to girls...if she is truly concern about you and you suddenly mia...she will worry much no? when you like a person or rather even love a person that much and suddenly that person mia..you will also feel worried..anxiety and stuff de ma..later she fell into depression how..

actually just send her a text saying that you will be back in aussie then from then see what she says..if she not concern liao then good for you lo..but if she is..i think you do owe her an explanation de

lol we got a kind badass over here! :x

[tripleaxe]

Alrighty bros...


Thanks for the wake up call guys...

Cheers...
.

Glad to hear that.

My bad also for not considering your own closure, which i am happy you have found it by writing the snail mail.

Its good being the better man.

All the best.

[TempLust]

actually just send her a text saying that you will be back in aussie then from then see what she says..if she not concern liao then good for you lo..but if she is..i think you do owe her an explanation de

Coming from a 13 points. This sounds like a bloody good plan. Find out & give her what she needs for her to move on.

As for Wizrd's closure, gonna kanna fuck for saying this. I don't really give a shit. He started it in the first place. You play the game, you gotta know the rules. He broke the rules and got his heart into it then he just gotta pay the price.

[Wizrd]

NNB lol

actually think about it lo...u just left like that no closure de...if you in the girl shoe you will sure think..NNBCCB...fuck me liao promise me to meet my parents..then leave me hanging...i deserve this meh...

well...i duno about you la...but if the girl wans explanation....you sure must give de....then do your closure lo....

one man meat is another man poison de ma...your poison maybe my meat leh..hahahahaha anyway i'll pretend that im you lo to meet the parents swee bo...lol

KNN im not taiwanese lo singaporean cannot sing chinese...must sing what...oh...

It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do
To look you in the eye
And tell you I don't love you
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to lie
To show no emotion when you start to cry
I can't let you see what you mean to me
When my hands are tied and my heart's not free
We're not meant to be
It's the hardest thing I'll ever had to do
To turn around and walk away
Pretending I don't love you

KNN how to carry toaster ard >.< wan carry also portable bunsen burner...and a metal plate ma to BBQ hahahaha CB!

ok la leave her alone or not actually is her decision de..why not msg her ask her how is she..then if she like never ask much then move on lo silent closure..if she becomes hysterical...hohohoho....i can pass some med to her lol sedate her....

no la actually this type of things varies from girls to girls...if she is truly concern about you and you suddenly mia...she will worry much no? when you like a person or rather even love a person that much and suddenly that person mia..you will also feel worried..anxiety and stuff de ma..later she fell into depression how..

actually just send her a text saying that you will be back in aussie then from then see what she says..if she not concern liao then good for you lo..but if she is..i think you do owe her an explanation de


Alamak...KNS...song singing again...:mad:

Ok bro...you go take your medication...double dose...diam diam sit in the corner first...Kor kor deal with you later...

KNN...confusing me...one post say cannot meet, one post say must meet...ehh...I cannot operate based on which and how much medication you take ok?
If I see you with that Bunsen burner, I'll light it up and shove it up your pet pet...NNKC...then you sure can get a job displaying fire breathing...gu niang...


Ok bro? Don't ka jiao us adults talking for a minute...sit in the corner and play with your razor blades and C4 explosives quietly, ok?


Haiz...


.

[Wizrd]

lol we got a kind badass over here! :x


Thanks bro...

Sorry about that...he is my good bro but...haiz...since he got raped by his kindergarten teachers, then by his primary school teachers and classmates, then by his high school teachers and school mates...now not very stable...whole day singing 'fat bottom girls'...

Not his fault because he kenna split personality liao...keep switching between a kind of bad and a kind of ass...so easily mistaken for kind badass...

But what to do bro? Who ask me to be his bro, right? So keep him around the camp site to take care of spiders lor...

Don't mind hor...paiseh paiseh...

:D

.

[Wizrd]

Glad to hear that.

My bad also for not considering your own closure, which i am happy you have found it by writing the snail mail.

Its good being the better man.

All the best.


Thanks bro...

My closure wasn't important...just worried about her...

Cheers...

.

[Tazzymercs]

WEAK

you still cannot make up your mind...i'm catering to what you need at the moment leh KNN

i never say dun meet i just said that its wise not to meet when there is no comfort zone

i think you need your medication for anxiety and depression liao lol

beside you realize that you do owe her an explanation whether you like it or not...

im just saying you text her first and see what she has to say la...if she not interested in you liao or that she dose not seem interested..you have your silent closure liao le ma..but if she becomes hysterical...you know what you have to do liao le lo...seriously...she in perth and you in melbourne..its not wise for you to BRING her over just as so you can break up with her lo...coz i duno..maybe she dun have close friends/close relatives/FB...

its best that you text her see what she has to say or react then you decide your course of action KNN...your minds more messed up then mine bitch lol

[Wizrd]

Coming from a 13 points. This sounds like a bloody good plan. Find out & give her what she needs for her to move on.

As for Wizrd's closure, gonna kanna fuck for saying this. I don't really give a shit. He started it in the first place. You play the game, you gotta know the rules. He broke the rules and got his heart into it then he just gotta pay the price.


Hahaha bro...

Thanks...and no...you may kenna fuck for the previous comment...what you said about me is true and I accept that...no worries...

But bro...13 points is a 13 points for a reason...cannot just accept what he says one...must think through...check his latest medication intake...talk to his doctors...then decide if can accept of not...

As much as I love my bro...his god father is that fucking Cao Cao...he also sama like his god father...One post tell me cannot...what if she jumps...my fault...don't contact...Then the next post say must contact her, otherwise she depression...then my fault again...Na bei...with him, must wait for the wind to settle down, then check where he stands...

In this situation bro...I can either leave things be since I already MIA...or contact her...in which case a face to face would work better than SMS or email...anyways, I'm not sure that giving her a way to contact me (phone number or email..) is a good idea...

But...

If I don't like where we are headed after initiating contact...say she keeps asking me to reconsider or to meet her again etc (since I cannot tell her the real reason...)...then, I need to change number/email to cut her off...which means going MIA on her a second time...with the second one strongly indicating that it's because of her...

So overall...not a good plan...


Thanks bro..hope you have some thoughts about what I just said...

And...please be kind to Cao Cao junior...he is trying very hard to be normal...if only he will take off that elephant trunk off his head... :rolleyes: :D

Cheers bro...


.

[Wizrd]

WEAK

you still cannot make up your mind...i'm catering to what you need at the moment leh KNN

i never say dun meet i just said that its wise not to meet when there is no comfort zone

i think you need your medication for anxiety and depression liao lol

beside you realize that you do owe her an explanation whether you like it or not...

im just saying you text her first and see what she has to say la...if she not interested in you liao or that she dose not seem interested..you have your silent closure liao le ma..but if she becomes hysterical...you know what you have to do liao le lo...seriously...she in perth and you in melbourne..its not wise for you to BRING her over just as so you can break up with her lo...coz i duno..maybe she dun have close friends/close relatives/FB...

its best that you text her see what she has to say or react then you decide your course of action KNN...your minds more messed up then mine bitch lol


Hahaha...ok...kor kor is back...what's up? :)

Errr...you join up all the C4 for what? And why you put that match on them? Hmmmm???...:confused:

Eh..I took one of your pills...that purple one...I think it will calm me down a bit...but something not right leh...feeling guai guai one...


Ok bro...cannot contact her through SMS...then she will have my other number...if she ignores me, that is the best case scenario...but if she talks lovey dovey...then how? Reply her lovey dovey also or reply cold cold? Either ways are wrong right?

Plus as stated above...if I cut off contact with her again (for whatever reason...)...that will be doing the bad deed to her twice..I don't want to do that...

Face to face is a possibility...but then cannot give her comfort zone...that would mean to meet her in Perth...then high chance C&C (or other siblings) may show up too...seriously not good...

In either case, she might jump...so...

At the moment..I'm already MIA to her...and yes, she may wonder and hate me...but modern women should be able to handle this kind of 'rejection' easier...many women always complain that after their dates, men say will call but don't call...to her, I am just one more arsehole who is like that...so I believe she will move on better than if I contact her again...


I hear what you are saying...but weighing the two possibilities...I think not contacting her is the better way...even though I dislike both methods...I have to choose the one causing less damage..


What say you now?


Cheers bro...


.

[TempLust]

I'm somehow caught in a same dilemma as you. Worst still, I'm already hitched with no option of un-hitching. So I do have an opinion from what I think is a right action. Biased ? Maybe.

You are sensible and logical. Will know what's best. Information is power. The more you can know, the better you can plan for you next course of action. Email is impersonal. Just buy a store value card from another country and use it from where you are. Thinks What's App or Viber can work using an ID and password. Maybe there is a Networking App that you might wanna explore.

Just help her to walk out of the darkness that you've created. I'm trying to do the same but it's fucking difficult. I have feelings too.

[Tazzymercs]

BRO there is always this thing call skype lol

use skype is international number..you can even configure your number to 123456 lol i know it coz my friend used it to prank call me ma kek ko kena f by me lol duno what hell number is that...

scarly answer liao the line opp is from hell how lol i already sinned alot liao...whore calling....flirting ard..sleeping ard...drinking..smoking....the four vices i all tio alrd...eat..drink..whore..gamble...

anyway...you do owe her an explanation whether you like it or not lo...imagine u in her shoes la...you may have may not KC her till she love you deep deep..but if is the latter...ho sey liao lo...either way..you have to let her know ma..

a love lorn woman is a crazy woman lo...if she really misses you like a siao hor...who knows...maybe jump/kill liao? or sink into depression wondering what went wrong..its very toturing de

[Wizrd]

I'm somehow caught in a same dilemma as you. Worst still, I'm already hitched with no option of un-hitching. So I do have an opinion from what I think is a right action. Biased ? Maybe.
.


Sorry to hear that bro...how did you resolve your issue? Or have you already resolved it?

Reply on my case below...stay tuned...


Cheers bro...


.

[Wizrd]

BRO there is always this thing call skype lol

use skype is international number..you can even configure your number to 123456 lol i know it coz my friend used it to prank call me ma kek ko kena f by me lol duno what hell number is that...

scarly answer liao the line opp is from hell how lol i already sinned alot liao...whore calling....flirting ard..sleeping ard...drinking..smoking....the four vices i all tio alrd...eat..drink..whore..gamble...



Hahahaha...bro...you really something wrong leh....123456 calling you also anyhow answer...haiz...must be too free...hoping it's a woman calling to find FB is it? :o

Errr...I think you have 6 sins already leh....eat...drink...whore...gamble....smoke...sia o ding dong....
And maybe if your condition continues...addicted to drugs also....

7 heavenly sins...you swee swee tio all....hahahaha...congrats...

Ok...dismantle the C4 castle you built ok? And put away the blow up dolls...I know it's confusing...but blow up dolls do not need C4 to blow up one...the two things are not linked...ok??...go eat dinner then take medicine and send more resumes...(I think a mental hospital somewhere needs patients to experiment on...try that one...good chance...):p

Reply to my case below...


Cheers bro...

[Wizrd]

Just help her to walk out of the darkness that you've created. I'm trying to do the same but it's fucking difficult. I have feelings too.


anyway...you do owe her an explanation whether you like it or not lo...imagine u in her shoes la...you may have may not KC her till she love you deep deep..but if is the latter...ho sey liao lo...either way..you have to let her know ma..

a love lorn woman is a crazy woman lo...if she really misses you like a siao hor...who knows...maybe jump/kill liao? or sink into depression wondering what went wrong..its very toturing de


Ok bros...


I hear what you guys are saying...but...


I have just gotten replies from my survey...I sent a scenario to all my women and some closer female friends...told them a mate of mine is in this dilemma...here's the scene set up...


If YOU met a nice guy and had a two week fling with him...you thought the two of you are great together and do think that this one has a chance to turn long term...

He had to travel for work and you two kept in touch for another week or so...then suddenly, no more news from him...no text, no calls...you tried calling him but his number is dead...texts are not returned and there is basically no other way you can contact him...

Now...another 2 weeks has gone by...You have no idea if he is dead or alive...

Suddenly...he texts you...ask if you want to meet in another city...he has something to tell you...he will buy the ticket for you to travel...you ask him what it is...he says he wants to tell you face to face...

1) what will you think?
2) will you go?
3) if his latest contact is to breakup with you...would you be happy for the latest contact or wish he never contacted you again?


Here are the answers...

1)
12 out of 17 thinks he is a con man trying to lure them to the new city for someone bad...
5 out of 17 just thought he is basically an arsehole.

2) unanimous...17 out of 17 will not go...

3) unanimous...17 out of 17 said they rather not get contacted again...

Follow on...
8 out of 17 said they would have good / fond / sweet memories of the fling if he didn't contact them again...like a holiday romance...
4 out of 17 said they would be worried sick about him and maybe assume he died, or got hospitalised, or abducted...but...since no way to contact him...they would have forgotten about him in a short time (never specify how short..,)
The rest didn't give follow on...


So...in the female wisdom...it's unanimous that they wanted to be left alone after and preferred not to be contacted again...

Bros...I understand...and part of me feel the same as you guys...but we maybe not giving enough credit to how strong/tough women are actually...

And based on this information...I guess you guys know my action plan...


Thanks bros...really appreciate your thoughts and support...give me more and we can always discuss it...

But I think the ship on contacting her sailed a few days after I went MIA...

Cheers bros...


.

[tcrecruit]

Take it with pinch of salt unless your respondents are westerners/westernized/ABCs.. Their mentality will b diff from SG gals...not sure how diff it will b to hook up a 25yo gal in SG for 2weeks of sex..but will assume its damn tuff!

[hknight2013]

Sorry Bro, I am new here and I don't know your reputation and history, I just want to express my honest opinion. Sorry if I offend anyone here.

I really don't understand if you are genuinely in a dilemma or you are enjoying this and wants to keep you readers enthralled with your MIA or not MIA, snail mail or not snail mail, contact or not contact drama. And I guess, like what another brother said, majority of the readers here are more interested in seeing you meeting up with her and waiting for more juicy posts from you, rather than giving their honest opinion and help you get over this.

From my humble understanding after reading your posts, I conclude that you are not a young punk, you have had quite a few no strings attached sexual relationships before, so what is the big deal here? You are obviously old and mature enough to handle this situation, which you are already half way through it and should be continuing what you do and finish it.

What is the purpose of the survey? Does it matter the survey is done with Caucasians or Asians? If you just want confirmation of what you have already done, which is MIA, is the most suitable thing to do, you already have it from the first few pages of this thread.

The poor girl wants to move on, you should too, since you never wanted this to be a long term thingy. So stop being so grandma grandma mother mother, drag mud bring water and just move on.

I am sure it will be more interesting and will garner more readers if you start posting your other adventures with more juicy details.

Cheers.

[Tazzymercs]

yes yes say him lol he thrive on being cheap..in cantonese its call jin kak hahahahahaha

he is so wishy washy like a girl lol WEAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


anyway bro since you come to conclusion already then stick to your ideals la hahahaha dun need to think liao le la..move on to next story please....

but then again to rub the last fine sea salt into you...well..i hope during your " holiday" in melbourne..you dun chance upon c&c&c&c lol the c family...later you really tio..HO SEY LIAO HUAT AH lol

chong : " hey wizrd looooong time no see..ho seh bo.."

you : " eh...er...ho seh..working"

just nice ching come...oh bastard......you come here for? have you seen our daughter..she this old liao blah blah blah....

chong : " chang! where you? come come see your long lost bastard uncle wizrd....last time he carry you wan..he carry you ..you no cry...."

chang think eh sek sek leh the name...pop by HO SEY.....

hahahahaha i sure laugh at you de...welcome to my medication family bro

[SammyNewbie]

Be gone smurfs and clones the whole lot of you in the name of sammyboyfor and his helper Big Sexy!

[Wizrd]

Take it with pinch of salt unless your respondents are westerners/westernized/ABCs.. Their mentality will b diff from SG gals...not sure how diff it will b to hook up a 25yo gal in SG for 2weeks of sex..but will assume its damn tuff!


Thanks bro...

Yes, I understand that but the cross section of the women in question are fairly widespread...and I believe the opinion is a woman's point of view and not too much country/cultural base...

Bro...hahaha...no...hooking a 25 yo SG woman is not that difficult...look around the threads bro...the mean active sex age for women in SG is roughly 27yo...which means 25 is coming into their prime for hooking...
Of course, this model is skewed because I'm sure there are many over 30s who are really active too, maybe they have gained the experience to not post or let their partners post their activities...nevertheless...the picture means 24-30 are the 'easier' hooking targets in Sg...the guys just need to have the right bait...:D

Cheers bro...

.

[Wizrd]

Sorry Bro, I am new here and I don't know your reputation and history, I just want to express my honest opinion. Sorry if I offend anyone here.

Cheers.


Hi bro...welcome to the thread and board...

I'm not sure what you didn't read but from what you said, I'm not sure you got the full picture...

If not for her parents, she and I would have no problems...but because of her parents, I cannot tell her why I cannot see her anymore...

Anyways...the survey was for my own understanding and done purely for me...

All the bros and sis here have been very helpful but also very conflicting...some say to contact her, some say to leave her alone...and because I really do not know which way is the best...I checked with my female friends to gauge reactions...

And from what I have learnt...leaving her alone sounds like the best way to go...and so..that's what I'm doing...

Whether some of the posters asked me to meet her for more stories is moot because with my state of mind, I made it clear that even if I do meet her, nothing juicy was ever going to happen...

Hope this explains what's going on...but please feel free to read the whole thread again to better understand the dilemma...

Cheers bro...

.

[Tazzymercs]

Wizrd

All the bros and sis here have been very helpful but also very conflicting...some say to contact her, some say to leave her alone...and because I really do not know which way is the best...I checked with my female friends to gauge reactions....

HO HO.....i know liao....good heart give you help...now come to conclusion liao throw us into drain liao le la....good heart no good return liao...../pout..good heart treat like dog bark...dog bite lu dong bing ah..duno good people heart liao..

use us liao then say we conflict you hor!...next time see you go die liao lol

[Wizrd]

HO HO.....i know liao....good heart give you help...now come to conclusion liao throw us into drain liao le la....good heart no good return liao...../pout..good heart treat like dog bark...dog bite lu dong bing ah..duno good people heart liao..

use us liao then say we conflict you hor!...next time see you go die liao lol


Hahahaha.....

13 points really 13 points...:rolleyes:

Ok bro...good boy...*pat pat Tazzymercs's head*... Kor Kor still loves you...no need to pout ok?

Sit down and drink your Chocolate milk and let Kor Kor explain slowly to you ok?

You see, Kor Kor was very confused with the situation....so...HEY!!! The straw is for your mouth, take it out of your left nostril now!!!!!! FFS...

Where was I?... Yes, so Kor Kor asked for help and gave out details for others to help with understanding of what happened...and many people helped by giving their points of view...but then the...NA BEI...French fries is for eating one...take them out of your ears...KNN...got chilli sauce some more?? NO!!! no need bunsen burner....WTF man???

Alrighty... As Kor Kor was saying...many helped, including you...but the views are very different...and you know lah...Kor Kor very open minded one mah...and can accept and agree with all the points of view...so lagi more confused because can only follow one route, right??...so discussed and debated each route...EHH CHEE BEI, can sit still to listen or not...what you doing now?? Why you play with mummy's lipstick??.. Haiz...yes, very creative but no...that is not what they mean when they say red cock ring...now put both the tiny sticks away ok? :rolleyes:

Anyways...you and the others all helped me to come to this conclusion...and Kor Kor was just explaining to the other bro on why it took so long to come to a conclusion...

Yes I know that he may not care but at least must answer the question right? And that does not mean Kor Kor do not appreciate your input ok?? In fact, very very appreciate...and always remember, Kor Kor will never be like your godfather Cao Cao one ok??

Happy now?? OH, NNB...no need take off pants to fart lah...but don't fart when i am here...fart later...that's a good boy...

Now go take your medicine and go to bed...Kor Kor has a date ok??...yes, with that cute woman waiting outside...no...you cannot fuck her first...NNKC...go take your medicine lah!!!

Good night ok bro...see you in the morning...:cool:




Cheers bro...


.

[back_it_in]

firstly, I LOVE YOUR STORY! reminds me of the movie crazy, stupid, love. in the end, the guy who fools around end up falling in love with his buddy's daughter and it was a happy ending. why not the same for you?

secondly, why don't you believe it's fate that you met her, whose father is your best friend before? though most of the rest agrees that you should just go on MIA. but can you really go on with your life with that guilt hanging over you about your old buddies, chong and ching? in one way or another, you can never resolve that guilt without that girl. be a man. do the right thing. just confess to her the whole story about her and her parents, snail mail will be better as she will see how much effort you have made to the confession. also, it will allow her time to read and re-read the whole content. if she still loves you, she will want to contact you back. if she still think of you as a fucker, she won't bother replying you. but at the end of the day, do you plan to start on a real relationship with her? if not, just tell her that as well. be as honest as possible. i'm sure she will understand.

though old memories may be ruffled for both of your old friends, can you bear to hold your own guilt within yourself? settle the past, and just embrace whatever the future may brings you.

anyway, your survey may be quite biased cos most people just don't want to hear the ugly truth while just remembering just the good things. isn't that normal? but touch your heart, and you will know what's the right thing to do. honesty is always the best policy. what if a few years down the road, you meet the three of them? all will remember you as a 1 big fucker and all hell will break loose. your good buddy will hate you even more for fucking his daughter, regardless of your intention.

[tripleaxe]

......what if a few years down the road, you meet the three of them? all will remember you as a 1 big fucker and all hell will break loose. your good buddy will hate you even more for fucking his daughter, regardless of your intention.


There are million of scenarios that can happen.

What has been done is done. No point what if this.....what if that......

No one can predicate what will actually happen.

Dammed if you do & dammed if you dont...

So the choice is which is the lesser of the 2 evil.

And from a female's point of view it has been made pretty clear

......you will know what's the right thing to do. honesty is always the best policy.

"Honesty is the best policy"..... though seems like a really really good intention, depends on the situation. Not every thing honesty...honesty.. is applicable.

You have to be wise in any situation

Think EQ, then you will understand

Of course it still boils down to TS choice & what is he prepared to accept base on the choices that he has taken.

[nitetcrawler]

We can all provide suggestions but ultimately it is TS decision what to do.

[Wizrd]

firstly, I LOVE YOUR STORY! reminds me of the movie crazy, stupid, love. in the end, the guy who fools around end up falling in love with his buddy's daughter and it was a happy ending. why not the same for you?

anyway, your survey may be quite biased cos most people just don't want to hear the ugly truth while just remembering just the good things. isn't that normal? but touch your heart, and you will know what's the right thing to do. honesty is always the best policy. what if a few years down the road, you meet the three of them? all will remember you as a 1 big fucker and all hell will break loose. your good buddy will hate you even more for fucking his daughter, regardless of your intention.


Thanks bro...

I see your point...really I do...

The way I weigh this is...

. Now => MIA causes one known problem...my guilt of hurting her...her pain is an unknown even though we can guess that she will be unhappy...but it is an unknown how much...
. Future => complete unknown because a multitude of possibilities can happen. No way of predicting each nor prevent any from happening. Likely case though is that all is forgotten and life kinda goes on as before we met...

VS

. Now => tell her the truth...causing 4 known case of hurt for C&C plus her and me...each and all of us may or may not recover from the hurt feelings or the warped relationships involved...
. Future => Still unknown depending on how each reacts to the truth. Cannot assume the best case scenario as that is only one possibility out of many...but likely though is that life will not go on as before...more guilt and blame will be placed on some or all of us...


Looking at the comparison above bro...I rather live with the MIA option...

I agree with bro tripleaxe with regards to honesty...but thanks for your toughts...much appreciated...

Cheers bro...




There are million of scenarios that can happen.

What has been done is done. No point what if this.....what if that......

No one can predicate what will actually happen.

Dammed if you do & dammed if you dont...

So the choice is which is the lesser of the 2 evil.

And from a female's point of view it has been made pretty clear



"Honesty is the best policy"..... though seems like a really really good intention, depends on the situation. Not every thing honesty...honesty.. is applicable.

You have to be wise in any situation

Think EQ, then you will understand

Of course it still boils down to TS choice & what is he prepared to accept base on the choices that he has taken.


Thanks bro...

100% agree...and I know I have to live with my choice...I am willing to accept that much....but I do have to make a choice...so MIA it is...

Cheers bro...



We can all provide suggestions but ultimately it is TS decision what to do.


Thanks bro...

All the suggestions are welcomed and important because each point of view gives me food for thought to eventually come up with this decision...god knows I have been tempted by each method at some point...but I rather control the damage than to only please my own conscience which may (will) cause untold harm to the other party and her family...


Cheers bro...

.

[tripleaxe]

Thanks bro...

100% agree...and I know I have to live with my choice...I am willing to accept that much....but I do have to make a choice...so MIA it is...

Cheers bro...

.

no problem bro. :o

[Wizrd]

no problem bro. :o


Thanks for being the voice of sensibility...

But why the :o face? I hope I haven't made a boo boo by calling you bro when you are a sis...

Gender notwithstanding...I appreciate your help...greatly...:)

Cheers...

.

[Tazzymercs]

Haiyah...you so long winded wan KNN....hurry up with the next installment la...

BTW IM NOT A GIRL...please dun not mistaken me for 1..thanks..you know who you are...:)

[Wizrd]

Haiyah...you so long winded wan KNN....hurry up with the next installment la...

BTW IM NOT A GIRL...please dun not mistaken me for 1..thanks..you know who you are...:)


Ah ha...bro...finally willing to come back to the camp site??

Huh? Na bei...what happened...what talking you again? Have you been messing with your dosage again?

Who mistaken you as a woman?? Haiz...told you don't be so 13 points, you don't listen...:rolleyes:


Ehh...what next installment? Have no news now leh...maybe can start another thread about other episodes...like the time when I broght my 13 points bro to the hospital and met this seriously cute therapist who wanted to practice with my body? or the time when my head wind bro made a scene at a cinema and the gorgeous manageress demanded physical compensation from me for bringing my bro to disturb her customers? Or the time when my mentally unstable bro say his teacher call him a woman and when I went to confront her, she turned out to be a very sweet biology teacher needing practical lessons??

So many stories...so little time...haiz...:D



Welcome back and cheers bro...

.

[georgemagnum]

Wizrd sir,

I had spent my lunch time reading thru this story of yours .... To sum it up, freaking solid!
Many of the decisions which you had made ..... I believe I would adopt them too ... *touch wood* I dun ever wanna be in that kind of situations ....
As it is, who is to say u r wrong .... Who is to say u r right? ..... It's a very difficult judgement call ...... I think it seriously is .....
Cheers! :D

gm

[Wizrd]

Wizrd sir,

I had spent my lunch time reading thru this story of yours .... To sum it up, freaking solid!
Many of the decisions which you had made ..... I believe I would adopt them too ... *touch wood* I dun ever wanna be in that kind of situations ....
As it is, who is to say u r wrong .... Who is to say u r right? ..... It's a very difficult judgement call ...... I think it seriously is .....
Cheers! :D

gm


Thanks bro...

Yes, life is merely a series of decisions...each leading us on the way to where we are today...right or wrong cannot be applied because we simply do not know how any of the alternatives would have turned out...

Hahaha...thanks, if you like what you read...check out my other threads...(sorry, shameless plugging of my other work here... :p )

Cheers bro...


.

[SammyNewbie]

I think a few of these people honestly are just clones by one person trying to disturb you. Ignore them lah wizard ;)

[tripleaxe]

Thanks for being the voice of sensibility...

But why the :o face? I hope I haven't made a boo boo by calling you bro when you are a sis...

Gender notwithstanding...I appreciate your help...greatly...

Cheers...

.


Hi bro, just a fellow brudder here only.

My :o face meant being humble. :D

Sincerely glad to be of help. :)

I have to say, from your responses & the way you write, you are a successful guy & able to handle yourself pretty well.

I like the way you phrase your words. I am impressed

All the best

[Wizrd]

I think a few of these people honestly are just clones by one person trying to disturb you. Ignore them lah wizard ;)


No worries bro...

After all, they are promoting my thread...so I'm happy to entertain...


Cheers bro...


.

[Wizrd]

Hi bro, just a fellow brudder here only.

My :o face meant being humble. :D

Sincerely glad to be of help.

I have to say, from your responses & the way you write, you are a successful guy & able to handle yourself pretty well.

I like the way you phrase your words. I am impressed

All the best


Hahahaha bro...

One big happy misunderstanding...:D

Good to clear this up...and thanks...:o (to indicate my own humbleness...)


Cheers bro...

.

[queeniegal]

Don't contact her since you went missing so long.

Lets time to heal her slowly..

Even you felt guilty or whatever just don't contact her..

I just went thru this type of lousy feeling. Someone missing contacted me few times..
Tears rolling, sad, angry many why inside the brain..heart want to reply but brain say no I should not.. Sleepless night..

I'm sure you are happier with your few keeper la lol

Good luck dude..