Tahan too long until dick go soft?

[Shooter]

When I make love to my GF, I can remain hard for about 20 mins making her come with the thrusting. The problem is when I want to come myself, I always find it very hard to reach climax. Have to really concentrate to make myself come. Sometime try too hard and didi go soft during change of position. A few occassion she has to HJ me.
I know I do not have erectile dysfunction and I do not have premature ejaculation. I realise that actual love making takes me longer to come (sometime cannot achieve it) and other form of stimulation like BJ and HJ seem to make me come faster.
Am I under too much stress or am I too use to BJ and HJ that making love makes is harder for me to come. Any advise to reverse this. By the way I have a understanding Ang Mo girlfriend who always reassure me it is ok but I feel kind of "Impotent". Haiz..... help me

[fun4evergood]

One question, are u a chinese? and she is an Ang Mo ?? .......dunno whether that affect it.... :p

[DehOne]

I have a simlar problems too bro. Can poke for 45 mins none stop, gf has multiple orgasms but me... nope. I can't seem to come unless I get a handjob or blow job. Very frustrating... :confused:

[Shooter]

To bro Fun4evergood I am a Chinese (local Singaporean)and my Gf is an Ang Mo girl. Maybe I am too stress to perform that I cannot come... but I dun think it is due to her. She is a real nice sexy girl.

Must learn the art of concentrating and focusing my energy onto my didi while making love. :D

[onenightstand]

same goes with me... :(

[Herich]

I also faces the same problem at times. Need a hj to cum. like what the girls say, no feeling. The most common causes are psychological. Common postulated causes include:

A strict religious background causing the person to view sex as sinful
Lack of attraction for a partner
Conditioning caused by unique or atypical masturbation patterns.
Traumatic events (such as being discovered in masturbation or illicit sex, or learning one's partner is having an affair)

You guys may find this link useful:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delayed_ejaculation

[whitegals]

One question, are u a chinese? and she is an Ang Mo ?? .......dunno whether that affect it.... :p

eh bro, i think is irrelevant right? saya is also chinese mah, and fat some more, and all the ang mo gers i bang here i also dun have this prob...

I think the threadstarter has already answered his own question in his 1st post. Yes mate, you are trying to hard. Try not to think about cumming, just make love to her or bang her, depending on the type of gal you are in bed with.... make not an issue out of it, focus on enjoying what you are doing and pretty soon, things will be back to normal... :cool:

[whitegals]

I have a simlar problems too bro. Can poke for 45 mins none stop, gf has multiple orgasms but me... nope. I can't seem to come unless I get a handjob or blow job. Very frustrating... :confused:

Bro, try and experiment with different positions... different people, boys and gals prefer different positions with regards to getting an orgasm. Try out the various positions, if in doubt, there is a thread somewhere in here with pictures of the positions, switch around but not during one night! Try out 1 or 2 positions each night for a week, then go on to the next 2.

Then pick out the ones you enjoy best and stick to them... :D

[Ultra6969]

Haha, I kinda have the opposite problem. Have never cum from a BJ or HJ before. Just won't fire. It's FJs all the way! Still to try an AJ.

[ypres]

Bro,

I think you may be suffering from performance anxiety.

[kudos]

maybe ask the doc for beta blocker to prevent u getting anxious easily...

[DehOne]

Bro, try and experiment with different positions... different people, boys and gals prefer different positions with regards to getting an orgasm. Try out the various positions, if in doubt, there is a thread somewhere in here with pictures of the positions, switch around but not during one night! Try out 1 or 2 positions each night for a week, then go on to the next 2.

Then pick out the ones you enjoy best and stick to them... :D

Thanks for the advice bro. Believe me, we try out several positions in every session that we have! I don't think it's a matter of position. We both prefer different rhythms - I like it slow and steady all the way, building the pace up gradually to a climax. She likes it fast and furious, after a short warm up. Also I tend to lose 'concentration' as I focus very much on pleasing her. I feel it is more of pyschological problem than anything else. The links provided by another brother were very informative.