What will you do to that man who cheat on your wife if you know who he is.

[jasonlianghs]

Hi guys,

New to this forum despite that i've know its existence years back.
I'm been with my wife for 8 years with no kids. Have never laid my eyes or hands on another women since i got together with my wife.
For the past 3 months i've notice my wife some change in character. After some hardcore investigation, i found out that she has been cheating on mmefor coming to half a year. And i know who this guy is and where he lives and work.

What will your do if you were to be in my shoes?

Lost ....

[sammyboyfor]

Time to get a new wife. :p

[sunhuan-con]

You cant blame everything to the man..it takes both hands to clap. Perhaps is your wife lie to him that she is single.....find the truth before u do anything. I understand how u feel...If cannot just let go. Once a woman betray u means she has no love. She can be very cruel to u.

[Edyta]

The person who has a marriage contract with you is your wife. The focus should not be that man. I know you are angry but it could be any other guy if not this one. Stay calm and talk to your wife to have an mutually agreed solution to this. Please take care and stay calm.

[firejalan]

Time to find evidence of her lies..to protect ur self..

[big321big]

The root of the problem is your wife, NOT THE MAN. Just like if somebody choose to take slimming pills to lose weight over exercise, and if he/she gets liver failure it is HIS/HER problem not the pills.

If I were you, I'd get good evidence (videos, pictures) of them cheating. Talk to a PI or a lawyer, ask them what is needed. Next stash your cash, hoard gold and bury them. Only if you have secured the EVIDENCE, and have a backup (backup as in stashing your assets) in case AWARE screws you over, you can then proceed to confront her.

[prettymannequin]

Why is she cheating, what is she missing from you that she has to seek from another man... settle that problem with your wife first. :)

[big321big]

Why is she cheating, what is she missing from you that she has to seek from another man... settle that problem with your wife first. :)

Oh ya and that. Lol totally forgot and went on the defensive. :rolleyes:

[jasonlianghs]

I have extracted all my wife's msg, whattsapp, wechat, even phone calls logs from singtel billing. Just shot of photos of them.

I know it takes 2 hads to clap. And partially it was my fault neglecting at certain point of life due to work commitments.

I also understand that its between me ans my wife but i can't let go of hatred for these type of hunters out there hunting down girls knowing they are married.

[prettymannequin]

Oh ya and that. Lol totally forgot and went on the defensive. :rolleyes:

Hahahah it's understandable, AWARE is a huge bitch for the guys so you gotta cover your back.

But for a woman to cheat, she is most likely missing something from her own relationship, and it just so happens another guy is providing that for her. So that is the important issue to tackle first between the couple before they decide on any course of action. :o

[big321big]

For ladies to cheat IMO, most probably goes down to lack of emotional support. Maybe TS was missing this? Only he knows...

[porscheclub]

I have extracted all my wife's msg, whattsapp, wechat, even phone calls logs from singtel billing. Just shot of photos of them.

I know it takes 2 hads to clap. And partially it was my fault neglecting at certain point of life due to work commitments.

I also understand that its between me ans my wife but i can't let go of hatred for these type of hunters out there hunting down girls knowing they are married.

#1 Dump her for betraying you
#2 Get a shot-gun & blast that MF. Failing which T-bone him car to car or catch them in bed then show him how a baseball bat is used other than hitting balls :D
#3 Go KTV, get couple of buddies & have ten girls service the room!

After doing all those & you're still alive without getting caught then go find yourself a new life.

Well, they have already told you the civilised Singaporean ways so choose wisely. ;)

[topcook1]

Quickly divorce her as she has no more feelings and respect for you. Anyway I have to congrats you for gaining your freedom. No point to bring back a woman who has no feeling for you.

[maxsee]

It takes two hands to clap...don't blame the other guy....he offers ur wife the bait and your wife took it....anyway karma will catch up with him one way or another.

For yourself, divorce her using the evidence you have and move on with your life. But you are still liable for alimony even if you can prove adultery in court...:D:D:D

[jackson3]

who women nowadays so cruel de

[justl00king]

I'm been with my wife for 8 years with no kids. Have never laid my eyes or hands on another women since i got together with my wife.

What will your do if you were to be in my shoes?

Lost ....Bro, it's your wife who've been astray, n good thing that there's no kids to worry about.

So if it was me, get evidence n time to get a divorce.
N with your new found freedom, there's no lacking of women for you to lay your eyes or hands on! ;)

Wish u all the best, good luck! :)

[ColdBlood99]

the man probably is SBF member :eek::D

[Castrol]

Why is she cheating, what is she missing from you that she has to seek from another man... settle that problem with your wife first. :)

so the other man is loaded and more handsome than bread pitt, how to settle?

[solarflare]

Hahahah it's understandable, AWARE is a huge bitch for the guys so you gotta cover your back.

But for a woman to cheat, she is most likely missing something from her own relationship, and it just so happens another guy is providing that for her. So that is the important issue to tackle first between the couple before they decide on any course of action. :o

i disagree that aware is a huge bitch... the younger members of aware is, but aware as a whole is not actually.

they were the ones who fought for paternity leave, they also wrote in to try and get some changes on WC.

For TS - please find out WHY she is cheating, before you think of what to do with the cheating.

[solarflare]

so the other man is loaded and more handsome than bread pitt, how to settle?

married for 8 years, i believe if love was once there, it would have taken more than money and looks to get her away from you.

What did the guy did right that you din?

[someonelonely]

I am sorry to hear that ... Like many bro said, stay calm , focus on the issue and talk to your wife. Take care

[demonhunter]

Organize a threesome with that Bro , see what he does that you do not do ...

You will know the answer as to why your wife cheated on you .

:D

[zan888]

Hi guys,

New to this forum despite that i've know its existence years back.
I'm been with my wife for 8 years with no kids. Have never laid my eyes or hands on another women since i got together with my wife.
For the past 3 months i've notice my wife some change in character. After some hardcore investigation, i found out that she has been cheating on mmefor coming to half a year. And i know who this guy is and where he lives and work.

What will your do if you were to be in my shoes?

Lost ....

1. Take revenge on the guy, go to jail for a few years and get free food/sex there

or

2. Take the lost and move on. I think few men can accept the goods once used by another man, so just find another gf etc. Better not to get married is possible unless want kids. Marry for what? Secure pussy? Despite what we think, it is NOT secured. Man only need to worry no money.

Choice is yours.

[Rocode]

Hi Ts, (From Bro To Bro Ah)

U Treasure The relationship/marriage?

Then talk It Out. Find A Solution.

OR

If She Disgusts You..

Hire PI, Gather Evidence, Black & White. Divorce Her. Clearly She thinks The Other Guy Can Satisfy Her Needs, Better Then You.

Why? Cause You deserve Better Then SCUM.

You Have No Kids. No Strings. Plenty Of Ladies Out There.

Best Regards
Rocode

[Hurricane88]

wow...so many opinions...well done to SBF...here can really learned many things...sexperts around...:)

I have nothing to add...:)

[ch1818]

Just dump that unfaithful wife of yours.......

[zan888]

I dont know why bros here say "Talk to wife" etc. Has anyone here managed to U-turn a relationship by talking to a woman? To me its a waste of time lol. Whats there to talk or resolve? If so easy then the woman will try to resolve first the unhappiness, once she fucks another, talk is out of the window.

I stand corrected if anyone manages to salvage a relationship with woman by talking! It is more likely you can solve by farkin than talking lol

[sammyboyfor]

I dont know why bros here say "Talk to wife" etc. Has anyone here managed to U-turn a relationship by talking to a woman?

Since the dawn of mankind, nothing has ever been achieved by talking to women because nothing a man says ever registers with the opposite sex the way it was intended.

Attempting to be logical and reasonable only makes things worse.

[soggypanties]

I have extracted all my wife's msg, whattsapp, wechat, even phone calls logs from singtel billing. Just shot of photos of them.

I know it takes 2 hads to clap. And partially it was my fault neglecting at certain point of life due to work commitments.

I also understand that its between me ans my wife but i can't let go of hatred for these type of hunters out there hunting down girls knowing they are married.

Just curious, how you managed to retrieve the call and msg logs?

[Greendevil]

TS, my advice is collect more concrete evidence loike photos and etc. keep it for future use. you never know when you need it.

at this point, your hatred is fuelled by your anger that blind you. i wont encourage or discourgae you to confront the other guy cos end of the day my
comment probably wont mean a thing to you. My question to you is, after you confronted him, make a fool of everyone including you, maybe even beat him up, then what next? what are you going to do next then?

I think once you have this answer, then probably you will; be clearer and can better decide what you should do now

[nickharold]

Hi Ts, (From Bro To Bro Ah)

U Treasure The relationship/marriage?

Then talk It Out. Find A Solution.

OR

If She Disgusts You..

Hire PI, Gather Evidence, Black & White. Divorce Her. Clearly She thinks The Other Guy Can Satisfy Her Needs, Better Then You.

Why? Cause You deserve Better Then SCUM.

You Have No Kids. No Strings. Plenty Of Ladies Out There.

Best Regards
Rocode

Think Bro Rocode made it rather clear. TS, you really need to know what you want right now la. At least in a sense, if you do choose the divorce route since you have lost all respect for the woman, at least you have no kids, so in a way, I guess no one else suffers.

Settle this in a manly manner though. Anger and hatred is definitely going through you right now, but don't let it take over unless you're gonna humtum him. Think through it logically and calmly. And most importantly, collect evidence if you really do divorce. Whichever, wish you the best.

[heye]

who women nowadays so cruel de

bro i had gone thru it.
All bullshit , woman sometimes also wanna play.
like many had advice you no point goin after dat guy.
I been betray more than once.
I knw maybe now u are goin thru wat i had been thru trying to salvage the marriage.
I did too but for me it didnt work out i cant forget same incident and i dunno how to face the world.
When i let her go it turns out to be more relax for me.
No more worries she will betray me again.
i take 2 weeks to accept the fact and i am married with kids.

I also found out she betray me with 5 guys for short term relationship.
Crap and bullshit if she tinks i am not good enuff then divorce me
wat is the excuse i wanna be with u , u take care of the family
when u nv regret at all wat u did.

In our time ppl are getting more and more self centre and not tink of family as a whole. I learn my lesson althou this is too harsh.
I had learn to love myself more.

[Curly Fries]

Since the dawn of mankind, nothing has ever been achieved by talking to women because nothing a man says ever registers with the opposite sex the way it was intended.

Attempting to be logical and reasonable only makes things worse.

This is the BEST TRUTH I've heard !
Amen !

[jackson3]

female nowadays all so cruel de........... once a women change in character<-------------------------------HO SEH LIAO LA

[wa81]

I guess some bros had given quality advice to you. Just my thoughts...

First you have to do a deep reflection and ask yourself, do you still love your wife and willing to forgive her for what she had done? What done cannot be undone, the damage, the scar will be there for a long time. But times do heal, just that it will take a long while.

Secondly, we can totally blame the guy for what he done but put yourself in his shoes, he may not be wrong if the feelings are mutual. IMO, its the lady who is more wrong for giving in to her temptations so going back to first point, do you love her enough to forgive her?

Thirdly, you do have to protect yourself. Gather whatever evidence and prepare for the worst. This is just to be objective. Going separate ways is not
hard, its whether is it a ugly process or a peaceful split.

Lastly, splitting would be the last option, you can go for marriage counselling if both are still willing to give each other a chance. Its about just finding that 10-15 mins of each others time, sit down in a comfy place, your living room after dinner, and just start that first sentence, taking the first step to open the mouth is the hardest ever, but just have the courage to say it out. You are husband and wife to start with.

What is not desirable most is letting anger and jealousy getting into your head. To answer to your question on what to do to that man, to have the courage to tell him to take good care of your ex-wife when the time arises. Take care bro.

[joscklee]

TS

how about BBQ ur wife lover's ku ku jiao

[LeeHsienLoong]

On a more serious note, what is the point?
The wife is screwing around for a reason.
Similar to us guys who screw around for many reasons too despite being married. :D

[arsenal_84]

Since the dawn of mankind, nothing has ever been achieved by talking to women because nothing a man says ever registers with the opposite sex the way it was intended.

Attempting to be logical and reasonable only makes things worse.

golden words of wisdom :D

[ClownoRama]

golden words of wisdom :D

Very true indeed

[Megatronzombie]

Very true indeed

Totally agreed with boss sammy

[MIFAcafe]

Learn so much here......

Should open a school and name it after boss.

Since the dawn of mankind, nothing has ever been achieved by talking to women because nothing a man says ever registers with the opposite sex the way it was intended.

Attempting to be logical and reasonable only makes things worse.

[MIFAcafe]

Getting a new wife?

Is it......

Jumping out of pan and go into the fire.


After doing all those & you're still alive without getting caught then go find yourself a new life.

Well, they have already told you the civilised Singaporean ways so choose wisely. ;)

[GreenGiraffe]

Learn so much here......

Should open a school and name it after boss.

Hahaha, :D

[jasonlianghs]

Thank you all for the advices and jokes.

Finally managed to get photos of them and have tapped some conversation between them.

Now just thinking of what to do.....
it seems like i can't let go of her. She still thinks that i dun know anything.

anyone knows if i get divorce with evidence of her infidelity, is she still able to claim anything from me? Like my assets, money and house ...?

Additionally the car that i drive was previously purchase under her name, and hers under my name.

Any experience bro knows how do i go about?
Will be meeting a lawyer on monday. Brain is telling me to just go ahead and divorce, heart is pulling me back.

[urgg]

Thank you all for the advices and jokes.

Finally managed to get photos of them and have tapped some conversation between them.

Now just thinking of what to do.....
it seems like i can't let go of her. She still thinks that i dun know anything.

anyone knows if i get divorce with evidence of her infidelity, is she still able to claim anything from me? Like my assets, money and house ...?

Additionally the car that i drive was previously purchase under her name, and hers under my name.

Any experience bro knows how do i go about?
Will be meeting a lawyer on monday. Brain is telling me to just go ahead and divorce, heart is pulling me back.

Bro, I sympathise with your situation. Can understand the suffering and pain you are going through. My advice to you is divorce. I duno much about the law governing divorce. I think you wun lose out since you got evidence..

What done is done. There is one old saying, quoted from TV drama. "when a vase breaks, no matter how you mend it, the cracks will still be there.."

[jackson555]

divorce is an easy way out, imo. Don't go ahead and divorce just because you are angry or hearsay that it is the only ending to cheating cases. Ultimately, it really depends on her attitude towards you and the marriage.
Secondly, please don't think that life after divorce is going to be easy or = freedom. There are bros and sisters here who can share their experience about life after divorce: http://sammyboyforum.com/showthread.php?t=481099

[porscheclub]

Getting a new wife?

Is it......

Jumping out of pan and go into the fire.

Bro, I said "life" not "wife" but sometimes people do want to marry again.

Thank you all for the advices and jokes.

Finally managed to get photos of them and have tapped some conversation between them.

Now just thinking of what to do.....
it seems like i can't let go of her. She still thinks that i dun know anything.

anyone knows if i get divorce with evidence of her infidelity, is she still able to claim anything from me? Like my assets, money and house ...?

Additionally the car that i drive was previously purchase under her name, and hers under my name.

Any experience bro knows how do i go about?
Will be meeting a lawyer on monday. Brain is telling me to just go ahead and divorce, heart is pulling me back.

Under our law. The wife can still claim from you even if she admits to committing adultery & the law also knows husbands will shift assets away so anything that you transfer out within a time frame (check with your lawyer) the wife can get a court order to have you surrendering them again under matrimonial asset/s. It's a long process taking up to 3-5yrs & we're supposed to swear in court about our assets as well.

If she earns more than you then you can actually claim from her too!

Your lawyer will explain but you must be armed with questions & seek how to protect yourself. Remember the common law here, "You can do anything you want but just don't get caught!"

If you guys share a HDB flat then troublesome. Cars can easily trade/sell/transfer.

Seriously, if I were you. I would teach that guy a lesson for screwing the wife. Sometimes, we have to Man up.

[4getful]

there r reason y women wanted rich man. i think as in an event of a divorce, the law that favour women cos they r typically assumed as victim, will entitled her to have a share of what the rich man owned; even she does not contribute anything or those asset r b4 they got married. that is y i think if govt want less divorce more happy family n more babies, it can be achieve by amending the law but i believe it is not possible to change even in the next 100yrs. so, no matter what, the men will be gg to make monthly payment to the adulterous woman to bonk other man after they divorced. of cos this will add pain to the alr distress men, maybe as a punishment on y they nv open their eyes big big b4 signing the paper?

[dresden]

Hey TS, I empathise with your current situation, maybe you should take a step back and decide what's next, try to clear your mind for a while. Some things in life are lost once it's broken, that's really true, but don't bring down your life over a momentary loss. A very genuine question you should ask yourself is that, if your wife admits her mistake and sincerely apologises, will you be able to accept that? Conversely, you should also justify to yourself why you cannot take such a matter lying. Once you have your reasoned justifications, your next move will be clearer and you will feel less unencumbered by them. I guess you should seek out married women for advice, since they are in a similar situation, better if it's relatives since they know about you and can give advice with good intentions for you

[Greendevil]

Thank you all for the advices and jokes.

Finally managed to get photos of them and have tapped some conversation between them.

Now just thinking of what to do.....
it seems like i can't let go of her. She still thinks that i dun know anything.

anyone knows if i get divorce with evidence of her infidelity, is she still able to claim anything from me? Like my assets, money and house ...?

Additionally the car that i drive was previously purchase under her name, and hers under my name.

Any experience bro knows how do i go about?
Will be meeting a lawyer on monday. Brain is telling me to just go ahead and divorce, heart is pulling me back.

She is still able to claim her shares of the property under both yours names. The car will goes back to the owner unless you have proven that you have been paying but again she will do likewise. some divorce can drag for years and some end swiftly minimum 6 months. i sugest that if you have gathered sufficient evidence and your decision is to go for divorce, i suggest you try to settle the asset and money matter amicably with her. this will save you unnecessary legal fees, time and not to mention the hell wreck ride of goin thru the whole divorce case thru court. in fact, if both can agree on the spiltting of assets and money, you both can engage only one lawyer to draft out agreement and settle it, and again save legal fees on both parties (50-50).

I will like to re-emphasis to settle it amicably, i.e. keep cool and calm, no point raising voice. already you have the upper hand and most likely she will agree to split the asset fairly, based on each contributions toward the asset. if all end well, you just got back your shares of the house, probably drive back each own car, no need pay her any additional single cents and off with you new life in 6 months time.

[BiRd13]

Under our law. The wife can still claim from you even if she admits to committing adultery & the law also knows husbands will shift assets away so anything that you transfer out within a time frame (check with your lawyer) the wife can get a court order to have you surrendering them again under matrimonial asset/s. It's a long process taking up to 3-5yrs & we're supposed to swear in court about our assets as well.

If she earns more than you then you can actually claim from her too!

Your lawyer will explain but you must be armed with questions & seek how to protect yourself. Remember the common law here, "You can do anything you want but just don't get caught!"

If you guys share a HDB flat then troublesome. Cars can easily trade/sell/transfer.

Seriously, if I were you. I would teach that guy a lesson for screwing the wife. Sometimes, we have to Man up.

Sorry bro. A bit side thread...

Let's say if the house is under the man's name. He bought it previously, and even after married with his wife, the house never include the wife's name.

If divorced, can the wife claim 50/50 for the house?

[porscheclub]

Sorry bro. A bit side thread...

Let's say if the house is under the man's name. He bought it previously, and even after married with his wife, the house never include the wife's name.

If divorced, can the wife claim 50/50 for the house?

As far as I know, anything that's under our name before marriage is considered yours & the spouse cannot claim. Also, make sure that she does not contribute direct or indirectly to your property. The moment she has Cpf or cheque contributions to your property then ;)

The court is also just in the sense let's say you build up a $100 million empire before marriage & this girl comes along to marry you then raise divorce, she cannot automatically lay claims to 50% of your empire. The case will be complicated if you're married for decades & the wife can prove that she helps you to build the business or eg. if she was a high income earner & becomes a homemaker aka housewife after marriage. She can then lay claims on lost income or contributing to household bills etc.

That's why I never let my wife pay for any telco & utility bills. All home expenses & medical are taken care of with my pocket.

Lastly, pre-nuptial agreement is not recognized in Singapore courts. You can have that contract signed but make sure that you're both registered in a country that recognizes that.

[BiRd13]

As far as I know, anything that's under our name before marriage is considered yours & the spouse cannot claim. Also, make sure that she does not contribute direct or indirectly to your property. The moment she has Cpf or cheque contributions to your property then ;)

The court is also just in the sense let's say you build up a $100 million empire before marriage & this girl comes along to marry you then raise divorce, she cannot automatically lay claims to 50% of your empire. The case will be complicated if you're married for decades & the wife can prove that she helps you to build the business or eg. if she was a high income earner & becomes a homemaker aka housewife after marriage. She can then lay claims on lost income or contributing to household bills etc.

That's why I never let my wife pay for any telco & utility bills. All home expenses & medical are taken care of with my pocket.

Lastly, pre-nuptial agreement is not recognized in Singapore courts. You can have that contract signed but make sure that you're both registered in a country that recognizes that.

Thanks bro for the clarification.
Yes. The current flat was bought way before my marriage.
After that, the flat does not include her name since we married.
Nor she contribute any money to the monthly rental as well.
So I will say she don't have any rights to have 50/50 share of this house right?

Thanks again!

[Xyberduke]

Hi guys,

New to this forum despite that i've know its existence years back.
I'm been with my wife for 8 years with no kids. Have never laid my eyes or hands on another women since i got together with my wife.
For the past 3 months i've notice my wife some change in character. After some hardcore investigation, i found out that she has been cheating on mmefor coming to half a year. And i know who this guy is and where he lives and work.

What will your do if you were to be in my shoes?

Lost ....

interesting how this thread has evolved.... back to answering the TS first query.

if i knew who that guy is, I'll engage a PI to collect evidence of adultery.
Once evidence is sufficient, I will storm in during one cheating session (within 6mths), give that bitch a tight slap and that motherf**ker a kick in his ass followed by re-arranging his face.

Then arrange for divorce. If need be, pay the bloody fine for assault.

[jason_]

one bro say man up and teach the guy a lesson, another say kick him in the ass and pay fine for assault... assault can use money to settle meh? may end up in jail, really not worth it since want divorce, just let go...

infidelity or not, with evidence or not, the woman can still claim against the husband, that is the power of woman's charter. even if she near a child which is not yours biologically proven using DNA test, but she conceive and give birth to the child while still married to you, you also have legal obligations towards that child which she bear for her lover, such serious problem i mention in another thread but nobody bother.

to cheapo singaporeans, dishonest handphone shop cheating hundreds of dollars is bigger issue, funny?

[Plaedes]

Dear Jason,

I do understand exactly what you are going through.

It is natural to feel a total rage, to want to rush up with a chopper to the other guy's work place, with a feel of righteousness, guilt, anger and vengeance for the heavens.

There are heavy consequences in SG.

I know it is not an easy time for you. I know it is weird posting on a sex forum. In my case, as I grow older, I find my true friends become lesser and I become more lonely.

For a relationship to work, it's either physical or emotional. Please, take a second to stay calm. Accept what has happened. Understand, that there was something missing in your relationship you both could not be happy with.

A relationship has to be happy. If either of you are not, why carry on? I know it's easier said, but why carry on, till the losses are way above what you can manage?

Can you forgive her? Can you look at in the eye and say, Dear, I am sorry, Let's try again?

Will you ever trust her again?

It will never be the same again.

And, you have a choice, right now. Whether you wana be drunk, go pay and fcuk in ectasy but a painful heart. Whether you want to let go.

Whether you want to forgive.