Can you really forgive, if you can't forget?

[JWNY]

Can you really find a way to forgive someone, if you can't forget what that person did to you?

JWNY

[knightnight]

Hurts huh!!!

Well Bro, its hard to put oneself in your shoes and feel the pain when the whole picture is not seen however, I have been thru such situations myself and experience has taught me some good lessons.

Firstly, Forgiving and forgetting are two different things. Often we mix them both up. Forgiving is a willing act of letting someone know that though it caused you a hurt, yet you CHOOSE to forgive the person and NOT bear any GRUDGE or hatred towards them in future. But forgetting is as simple as memory and your mind. Guys like me tend to forget over time, but I know people who remember the color or lipstick the girl wore when she dumped him. So its all based on the individual.

Dealing with someone who has caused you pain is hard, but forgiving is the FIRST step. That will give you a peaceful mind, you no longer will scheme or device against the person and your whole being is better.

Forgetting is time Dependant and if the person who caused you the pain, beings to heal the relationship from their side, forgetting is even easier....

just my 2 cents mate

[DenmarkDoll]

Forgive easy, forget hard...

I never forget but i always forgive. :D

[The_Unrepentant]

Can you really find a way to forgive someone, if you can't forget what that person did to you?

JWNY

can forgive but never forget. if u forgive u are big hearted. if u forget, sorry, u r plain stupid.:D

[MMM88]

well.....if she gives me BBBJ all the times....surely i will b too sextified n busy to remember (wat she did wrong )..yeah...:p

[Manofwar]

Well for me, guess need to depends wat she did lo. Of cos if given Green hat( + 2 timer) liao.... cant forgive i presume nevertheless say forget.

Guess for my case, been kinda of extreme ba... but hate to say that she wont appricate those i given her still seek for other and giving the excuse that she still remenber those time she had been hurt.( for my ex case)

Forget her as GF.. but forgive her as frd?? perhaps

[XboxSG]

4 relationship, the easiest way to forget the old one is to start a new one

[PS3SG]

Life's goes on, never turn back

[milo_man]

NV in my lifetime. Since she knew she did something which will hurt me forever, den she beta expect forever enemity.

[antlau]

i am big-hearted stupid man, meaning i am a forgiving and forgetful man..

:D :rolleyes:

[RedIndian]

forgetting is not stupid thing.

In my view, forgetting shall not be taken in literal sense. That is a choice, to keep whole affair in low priority or to brush aside the thought whenever it arise.

Nobody can forget the pain.

[asdfghjkl]

This is moral reasoning.. must see the case first then can decide ler.. :o

[DenmarkDoll]

This is moral reasoning.. must see the case first then can decide ler.. :o


True and agree! It is base on a case by case thingy actually. :)

[tristanova]

Time will heal all wounds. You may not be able to forget but may forgive. Especially so, when you get older into your twilight years.

[Shuang_Jie_Gun]

for me,i have learned to forgive.life is too short for u to bear the grudge for so long.maybe i have not met someone who dealt me with a very big blow but this is what i feel for now.;)

[qw2op]

sum ppl will do anything @ ze expense of others ... sum ppl r nt aware of or choose 2 ignore ze effects of their own actions on others ... sum ppl r just born like dat ...

u hv no control as 2 who u meet in life ... u may nt noe abt a person until u hd it ... un4tunately, u hv 2 meet them n 'kena' fr them in ur life ...

life is short ... no pt keeping the hatred feeling wif u on sumthing dat u juz hv to experience in ur life ... otherwise, u dun feel happy everyday ...


if ze person could do it once on u, he/she could do it many times on u ... would u let ze same person do ze same thing 2 u over n over again? ... would u think of urself as being stupid of nt learning a lesson? ... dat fella may even b laffing @ u behind ur back 4 being so naive ... nt many ppl allow dat ... me no exception either ...


my 2.1 cents worth (gst incl.) ...

[Toyota Honda]

Time really heals the wound. Thogh it may not be fully... cos you still cannot forget the hurt..

I am currently in this situation where my longtime gf left me late last year... supposedly for another guy who is in the AirFiorce. I was badly hurt and really wished them all the worst...

for the first few months feelings things were bad.. and feel very sad, disappointed and sore over her...

Now, I have more or less accepted the fact that she really has gone.. And I really miss her.. Hope that she is happy with whoever she wants to be and wishing her all the best.. Never mind that I might be lonely forever, so long as she is happy.. Anyway, I have come to face the imminent fact that I will be single for the rest of my lofe cos I don't know how to love a person after her again..

I have forgiven her, but I can't forget her..

[Shuang_Jie_Gun]

Before u choose to bear the grudge and hate someone,there is a few questions worth pondering:

1)Does he/she knows u hate him/her?

2)Is it worth it,what do u take in the end?

3)Live a happy or sad day also 1 day will pass which will be better?

For myself,i will truthfully answer these qtns and once i got the answer,i moved on and am happy abt it.Maybe not totally satisifed but at least it did felt better.:)

[hoesay]

To forgive and forget it is easy to say then done, however it should highly dependent on the level of damage. I found that most of the cases I would forgive first and as for forget just let time to do the job.

[thruster]

Forgive easy, forget hard...
I never forget but i always forgive. :D

Same here Brother :)

[maomao]

Can forgive, but certain thing may not be easily forget :)

[no_faith]

i dun tink can forgive if i cant forget
coz deep in ur heart n mind, you could not overcome the hurt inflicted on u
but tat depend. if the hurt was sml, forget n forgive loh

[Ah Q]

Forgive easy, forget hard...

I never forget but i always forgive. :D

For me depends...
small matter can forgive and of course, easily forget.

But big matter can (sometimes) forgive but how to forget?
Only thing is no need to bring up like a gramafone record as will spoil the relationship...True easy to talk but difficult to do...

[wetger]

I think I can forgive lor....life is so short and unpredictable, no point keeping unhappy memory with me :)

[Camry38]

I can forgive too :D

[I.O.N.U]

I guess given time , one can forget.

[Thai Rak Thai]

i can't forget and i sure won't forgive :mad:

[High till Dry]

i can't forget and i sure won't forgive :mad:

i know who u r talking about...:D

[curious75]

my ex gf which had two timing on me.i forgive her but cant forget :(

[tobediscreet]

My soon-to-be-wife. For two-timing me with some rich SOB during our first few months. But at least it lets me go GL or do FLs with less guilt.

I'm a SOB.

[Professori]

Interesting question. Especially since most people never forget. But I believe it can be done. Forgiveness means not holding it against the person.

[Watsons]

well it depend too what kind of situaction ur getting into 1st :)

[Thai Rak Thai]

Interesting question. Especially since most people never forget. But I believe it can be done. Forgiveness means not holding it against the person. got saying- 'do good no 1 say do 1 small bad thing all ppl knoe' :cool:

[Chinmeng]

Be happy and do some other thing like watch AV, KTV where more people around. Worst if you can't forget or forgive and need to van your anger, then go GL and Fxxx as many time you can. You should be shiok and tire after that.