How should I take things to the next level?

[boft]

Dear bros and sis out here, i have a problem which has been bugging me for quite a while. Hope to have advice from the more experienced ones out here :) :)

I have this close female friend whom I like for the longest time already, but as she was attached when I first knew her, I could only keep my thinking to myself. But recently, she broke up and is now single. As such, i began to initiate more meetups and there were times when she would initiate to meet up for dinner and drinks. We would often hang out together, be it just the two of us or with our friends (she was comfortable with meeting up with my friends and vice versa). When teased about how often we hang out together and that we should be together, there was no rejection on her side.

Now the problem is, how should I confirm that this is not something that I just wished would happen and that I can take things to the next level, as im afraid that if i rush things, things would become very awkward and i do want to keep her as a friend.

Any advice?

[katong]

This kind of situation, it's right to go with the mentality of YOLO.

Don't try, later other people potong jalan then you will be again forever alone with your right hand

[conquer]

Strategically, you need to know the reason why she broke up with her ex-boyfriend, whether she is ready for a new relationship, her feeling towards you... all sort of tedious procedures you need to go through to understand her state of mind.

But, I would recommend you to take the short cut: just ask. The answer usually would be yes or no. If yes, congratulations; if no, go for next target.

[DeanAmbrose89]

my advice to you is, since she break up with her boyfriend (not sure how long was it) but since u are not with her, maybe try to be by her side first like when she need a someone to be there and stuff, then if thing work well then pop the qn. but if you think it's about time liao then just confess and see how she would react. i wish u all the best and support to hope u get this gal that u like.

[DeanAmbrose89]

Strategically, you need to know the reason why she broke up with her ex-boyfriend, whether she is ready for a new relationship, her feeling towards you... all sort of tedious procedures you need to go through to understand her state of mind.

But, I would recommend you to take the short cut: just ask. The answer usually would be yes or no. If yes, congratulations; if no, go for next target.

i agree to Bro conquer suggestion but do have a plan b in hand in case thing don't wrk out.

best of luck boft.

May the force be with u hahaha..

[Arexis]

If friend for long time, maybe kana friendzone already...create some spark, spur her emotion, get abit touchy and ask. Drag too long sure no hope. You will really rather she say No to you now than this drag on few more years...time wasted.

[Jebuschris91]

Now the problem is, how should I confirm that this is not something that I just wished would happen and that I can take things to the next level, as im afraid that if i rush things, things would become very awkward and i do want to keep her as a friend.

Any advice?


Honestly, you probably don't want to keep her as a friend. Which normal guy wants to see the girl he likes, end up with another guy when they have been hanging out and having meals together all these while.

So no, don't kid yourself. What you want is for her to be yours, not your friend.

Like what Conquer said, just ask. Actually, more of tell her how you feel. Tell her why you like her and then see what she says, if she rejects you, then she's been friend zoning you the entire time and then what's the point of you being so close to her, we are men, not women.
You're wasting your time on a female who will probably never want you intimately and you could be pursuing other women who would want to have intercourse with you and hold your hand afterwards.

If she says yes then good, problem settled. May you last long and maybe spawn a child or something in years to come.

[strikeback4]

Just tell her your feeling, how much you like her bla bla bla...

The longer you dilly dally about this. the faster she will be grab by other guys....

Even if she reject you, both of you still can be friends what right? :rolleyes:

[DeanAmbrose89]

bro i like the way u say it.

[fringe929]

ah ya... just grab her hand when crossing road and after cross road liao, still keep holding on.... from there you will know where you stand with her...

3 scenarios : 1) she keep letting you hold.... just cont holding as she understood your meaning and is ok with it.
2) She drop your hand and look at you funny... just say "oh.. sorry" and cont on ur normal routine like nothing happened.... if she probe you about why you keep holding your hand later, means you are in luck as she just needs a confirmation on you wanting her as your gf.
3) She drops your hand and looks at you funny.... and don't talk about it anymore.... and suddenly keep trying to keep her distance by not jioing you out etc or take very long to answer ur messages or with just a 1 word reply.... means you kanna friend zone and she never see you as a male but as a friend all along.

[strikeback4]

ah ya... just grab her hand when crossing road and after cross road liao, still keep holding on.... from there you will know where you stand with her...

3 scenarios : 1) she keep letting you hold.... just cont holding as she understood your meaning and is ok with it.
2) She drop your hand and look at you funny... just say "oh.. sorry" and cont on ur normal routine like nothing happened.... if she probe you about why you keep holding your hand later, means you are in luck as she just needs a confirmation on you wanting her as your gf.
3) She drops your hand and looks at you funny.... and don't talk about it anymore.... and suddenly keep trying to keep her distance by not jioing you out etc or take very long to answer ur messages or with just a 1 word reply.... means you kanna friend zone and she never see you as a male but as a friend all along.

lol like ch8 drama :D

[virgone]

Dear bros and sis out here, i have a problem which has been bugging me for quite a while. Hope to have advice from the more experienced ones out here :) :)

I have this close female friend whom I like for the longest time already, but as she was attached when I first knew her, I could only keep my thinking to myself. But recently, she broke up and is now single. As such, i began to initiate more meetups and there were times when she would initiate to meet up for dinner and drinks. We would often hang out together, be it just the two of us or with our friends (she was comfortable with meeting up with my friends and vice versa). When teased about how often we hang out together and that we should be together, there was no rejection on her side.

Now the problem is, how should I confirm that this is not something that I just wished would happen and that I can take things to the next level, as im afraid that if i rush things, things would become very awkward and i do want to keep her as a friend.

Any advice?

Advice: if you are not going to open your mouth and ask, you are not going to get.

Girls likes guys to be confident and daring.

Since she didn't reject when tease, then you already stand a good chance. Don't miss it.

[Parfum]

Advice: if you are not going to open your mouth and ask, you are not going to get.


Very true bro

[DeanAmbrose89]

waaa bro like this i kena a lot of friendzone sia :(

[sexcision]

Personally, since you both have been meeting with each others friends. I believe the feeling should be mutual, maybe go the the beach or somewhere quite after a regular dinner and pop the question? Try holding hands like one of the bro suggestions.
i believe u have a pretty good chance.
Go for it bro!

[boft]

Good advice from all the bros here! I think i have an idea what i should be doing already :):)

Thanks again everyone!

[DeanAmbrose89]

Personally, since you both have been meeting with each others friends. I believe the feeling should be mutual, maybe go the the beach or somewhere quite after a regular dinner and pop the question? Try holding hands like one of the bro suggestions.
i believe u have a pretty good chance.
Go for it bro!

totally agree with u on this.

[FindersKeepers]

Very true bro

Indeed very true

[alec]

Still need to consider meh? Why not just ask her to be your gf and you'll get your answer. As long she steady, you steady, both of you will steady bom bi bi

[sammygirl29]

I`m would recommend you to take the short cut: just ask. The answer usually would be yes or no. If yes, congratulations; if no, go for next target

[Lorres]

Just ask. Life is too short.
Never try never know.
Its not a marriage proposal. Hence just go ahead and date. (sex, optional).
If it doesn't work out, then part graciously. And if feel can no longer even be friends.... then so be. That's life.

[CurioCity]

I`m would recommend you to take the short cut: just ask. The answer usually would be yes or no. If yes, congratulations; if no, go for next target

Logical advice :)

[conquer]

ah ya... just grab her hand when crossing road and after cross road liao, still keep holding on.... from there you will know where you stand with her...

3 scenarios : 1) she keep letting you hold.... just cont holding as she understood your meaning and is ok with it.
2) She drop your hand and look at you funny... just say "oh.. sorry" and cont on ur normal routine like nothing happened.... if she probe you about why you keep holding your hand later, means you are in luck as she just needs a confirmation on you wanting her as your gf.
3) She drops your hand and looks at you funny.... and don't talk about it anymore.... and suddenly keep trying to keep her distance by not jioing you out etc or take very long to answer ur messages or with just a 1 word reply.... means you kanna friend zone and she never see you as a male but as a friend all along.

4) She kneels down and gives you a blowjob for helping her crossing street. :cool:

[DeanAmbrose89]

hope this Ts got the answer he was looking for and hope he give us an update :)

[avantas]

Dear bros and sis out here, i have a problem which has been bugging me for quite a while. Hope to have advice from the more experienced ones out here :) :)

I have this close female friend whom I like for the longest time already, but as she was attached when I first knew her, I could only keep my thinking to myself. But recently, she broke up and is now single. As such, i began to initiate more meetups and there were times when she would initiate to meet up for dinner and drinks. We would often hang out together, be it just the two of us or with our friends (she was comfortable with meeting up with my friends and vice versa). When teased about how often we hang out together and that we should be together, there was no rejection on her side.

Now the problem is, how should I confirm that this is not something that I just wished would happen and that I can take things to the next level, as im afraid that if i rush things, things would become very awkward and i do want to keep her as a friend.

Any advice?

Hi TS

Please don't have a "loser" mentality as " staying as a Friend if things don't work out ". I am in my forties now and seldom see any man and woman stay as friends with regular meet ups and conversations, especially if they are married.

I can understand that your affection for her may warrant a desire of a "no fish prawn is good" outcome. But it will just lead to disappointments and may impact your opportunities with other women.

Organise something special with her and pop the question. Typical sg women are very procedural, as Long as you do something unique to signify her value and you fit the profile of what she is looking for, she would accept it.

Do note that some woman love the spare tyre effect where you don't fit what they want but they keep you around for the attention and benefits.

Most of the time, my experiences taught me to move on to others if she rejects me on the first try regardless of her explanation or excuses. Things like "she needs more time", "she needs to know you better" are all stalling tactics by woman who have options other than you.

If the feeling is good and there are no other commitments, any sensible woman will give the relationship a try unless she prefers you to stay in the Friend zone.

[xqueen]

action and communication :p

[tzeryin]

Red Card always give to good guy.

[randyrockhard]

If you never ask, the answer would always be a resounding "No"

[fringe929]

or you can chut the pattern my first gf chut on me...

we were just like going out all the time together... but i never asked her to be my gf...

Then one day she turn and looked at me saying" my neighbors saw me and you together, asked me if i was her bf".... Then she looked into my eyes and said... "so ... are you my bf?".... stuck in such a sudden situation .. i blurted out..." ya...

Can try this if you want

[knot]

I`m would recommend you to take the short cut: just ask. The answer usually would be yes or no. If yes, congratulations; if no, go for next target

+1 agreed here

[arsenal168]

or you can chut the pattern my first gf chut on me...

we were just like going out all the time together... but i never asked her to be my gf...

Then one day she turn and looked at me saying" my neighbors saw me and you together, asked me if i was her bf".... Then she looked into my eyes and said... "so ... are you my bf?".... stuck in such a sudden situation .. i blurted out..." ya...

Can try this if you want

In this mondern days, if the girl is interested in u, she will tell u or hint u.

Even the most shy girl will hint u subtly.

If u dun get any, means she is just comfortable as a friend with u at this stage n has no wish to take it further.

[sgxxr]

Hi TS

Please don't have a "loser" mentality as " staying as a Friend if things don't work out ". I am in my forties now and seldom see any man and woman stay as friends with regular meet ups and conversations, especially if they are married.

I can understand that your affection for her may warrant a desire of a "no fish prawn is good" outcome. But it will just lead to disappointments and may impact your opportunities with other women.

Organise something special with her and pop the question. Typical sg women are very procedural, as Long as you do something unique to signify her value and you fit the profile of what she is looking for, she would accept it.

Do note that some woman love the spare tyre effect where you don't fit what they want but they keep you around for the attention and benefits.

Most of the time, my experiences taught me to move on to others if she rejects me on the first try regardless of her explanation or excuses. Things like "she needs more time", "she needs to know you better" are all stalling tactics by woman who have options other than you.

If the feeling is good and there are no other commitments, any sensible woman will give the relationship a try unless she prefers you to stay in the Friend zone.

This advice is gold.

It's pointless to "stay as friend" after initial rejection. It hinders you from moving on to a better girl

[25minutes]

TS -just say want to up her. What is the worst can happen?

[6livings]

TS -just say want to up her. What is the worst can happen?

Same thoughts here.