When easy becomes a problem...

[winstonlyj]

Dear SBF bros,

I got into the hunting mood for fbs, ONS about 3-4 years ago.
Started off with about 1-2 flings every 3months and after awhile, I'm picking up gals every other week almost like my second nature... All these while attached.

I enjoy the challenge, the bonks, the achievement of conquering random "guai" looking gals, public fucking, recounting my sexperience to acquaintances, etc. But I'm trying to settle down now as i want to commit to my relationship and I can't get rid of this addiction...

Any bros in similar situation?
Any advice?

[YoloTown]

Power to you....

When you are naturally tired of it then its the right time to settle down?

many married men also have affairs though...

[Kittenz]

Dear SBF bros,

I got into the hunting mood for fbs, ONS about 3-4 years ago.
Started off with about 1-2 flings every 3months and after awhile, I'm picking up gals every other week almost like my second nature... All these while attached.

I enjoy the challenge, the bonks, the achievement of conquering random "guai" looking gals, public fucking, recounting my sexperience to acquaintances, etc. But I'm trying to settle down now as i want to commit to my relationship and I can't get rid of this addiction...

Any bros in similar situation?
Any advice?

yeah me too bro no challange, i just smile at a girl as next thing she in my car sucking my penis, also with money, i just go casino and 99% win 1-2k so i stop working 10 yrs already, no need to do anything just smile get bonk, walk in casino win money, no challange in life i think kill myself

[Koibitosan]

Firstly, how do you pick gals weekly? That is some feat. Kudos to you.

[winstonlyj]

Power to you....

When you are naturally tired of it then its the right time to settle down?

many married men also have affairs though...

The problem is I'm not tired of it, at all. I'm still enjoying every second of it but I want to give my all to a loving and committed gal.

"many married men also have affairs though", to me, this is the "addiction" that I'm worrried about... that i cannot stop hooking up with gals that i bearly know...

[winstonlyj]

Firstly, how do you pick gals weekly? That is some feat. Kudos to you.

Every other week bro, thereabouts during my peak...

Every week is possible but way too time consuming and i cannot manage that haha.

[winstonlyj]

yeah me too bro no challange, i just smile at a girl as next thing she in my car sucking my penis, also with money, i just go casino and 99% win 1-2k so i stop working 10 yrs already, no need to do anything just smile get bonk, walk in casino win money, no challange in life i think kill myself

Then you're one up in this aspect. I still find it a challenge but that's where i find enjoyment :)

[ilovepantyhose]

yeah me too bro no challange, i just smile at a girl as next thing she in my car sucking my penis, also with money, i just go casino and 99% win 1-2k so i stop working 10 yrs already, no need to do anything just smile get bonk, walk in casino win money, no challange in life i think kill myself

:eek::eek::eek:

cool story bro

[mitosblog]

When I was a student in uni I had a very big problem; I got addicted to gambling, my best friend told me if you don't quit now you are going to destroy the entire family by ending up poor, being in heavy debt, looked down by relatives. I know I had to quit for good, all by myself, and today I am no longer addicted to gambling, I live a normal life without gambling. My case no different from yours, quit now before you destroy your own relationship. There will be no happy ending if she found out about your lifestyle someday. Confirm divorce if you decide to marry her. So take action now if you have plan to marry her in the future. Good luck bro

[Parkerlon]

When I was a student in uni I had a very big problem; I got addicted to gambling, my best friend told me if you don't quit now you are going to destroy the entire family by ending up poor, being in heavy debt, looked down by relatives. I know I had to quit for good, all by myself, and today I am no longer addicted to gambling, I live a normal life without gambling. My case no different from yours, quit now before you destroy your own relationship. There will be no happy ending if she found out about your lifestyle someday. Confirm divorce if you decide to marry her. So take action now if you have plan to marry her in the future. Good luck bro

How did u quit Bro?
I'm still addicted

[mitosblog]

How did u quit Bro?
I'm still addicted

Before I decided to quit, all I was thinking was how to earn back all the losses and even try to seek solution with a gambling counsellor. The more I bet the more I will lose. In the end I said to myself never mind of the losses. Just quit for good and never looked back. This is what I called self determination. It's entirely up to oneself to quit. The choice is in your hand.

[winstonlyj]

Before I decided to quit, all I was thinking was how to earn back all the losses and even try to seek solution with a gambling counsellor. The more I bet the more I will lose. In the end I said to myself never mind of the losses. Just quit for good and never looked back. This is what I called self determination. It's entirely up to oneself to quit. The choice is in your hand.

This is actually a very good example, thanks bro.

I know it is hard to quit when you are losing, etc.
Imagine if you are winning every hand (its an exaggeration but imagine winning 60% of the time...)
And yes, that is me right now...
I'm "winning" the gamble but not exactly winning either.

Not sure if I make sense...

[mitosblog]

This is actually a very good example, thanks bro.

I know it is hard to quit when you are losing, etc.
Imagine if you are winning every hand (its an exaggeration but imagine winning 60% of the time...)
And yes, that is me right now...
I'm "winning" the gamble but not exactly winning either.

Not sure if I make sense...

Gambling is like this, at first you win some and you want to win more. But you don't know how to stop when you start losing. In the end you lose all the money. Luckily I did not end up in debt to anyone as I was using my parent's money. The only solution is to let go of all of the losses. I did not take any pills or see any doctor for my gambling problem.

I need to get out of this hell hole alone. It was really difficult in the beginning as the craving was still there you know. It took me many years to overcome this addiction by learning from other people experience such as from people who owed money to loan shark, children who got disowned by their parents due to gambling debt, wife divorcing husband due to gambling, etc.

If I don't stop I cannot imagine how my life would be today. Because I accept life is filled with ups and downs. Losing in gambling is one downside in my life and I accept it as path of learning and growing up. Because in real life if you never fail you cannot learn anything. I accept it with open heart and decide to move on with my life.

I then get involved with regular physical exercise and I found out that this has transformed me over the last 5 years. My confidence increased, I no longer get addicted to gambling, even if I do I only play for fun and bet small amount, win or lose does not matter to me anymore. I felt so much healthier than before. Some ppl even commented I looked younger 10 years than my real age!

To eliminate the craving of bonking outside you can substitute it with a much better hobby such as going for regular exercise and see the difference in your overall long term health. It works for me, I do not see how it cannot work for you if you put full effort in. But let me tell you to change you need discipline, consistency and action.

When I am doing physical exercise I also met obese people (over 100 kg) trying to lose weight by walking for few days and after that disappeared and never see him again. I can sense that he must have given up on losing his weight completely.

The same goes to you, very difficult in the beginning, but at least you must make a first move to find a new hobby, try it and enjoy it. Eventually you are going to get rid of your current hobby. Because if you don't you are going to follow the same old path after you get married and will continue the same old habit even when you have children.

[jnudes]

You want to settle down is normal for every guy that want to end their bachelorhood.

The main thing is do not marry a wrong woman. Or else the consequences are far more painful that you can imagine of. :D

[911s]

How did u quit Bro?
I'm still addicted

You will stop when the money dries up. lol

[*FiReWoRkS*]

This is actually a very good example, thanks bro.

I know it is hard to quit when you are losing, etc.
Imagine if you are winning every hand (its an exaggeration but imagine winning 60% of the time...)
And yes, that is me right now...
I'm "winning" the gamble but not exactly winning either.

Not sure if I make sense...

Bro on the contrary it is actually hard to quit when you are winning not losing..

I'm just like you but I've been in cold turkey for the past one year because i've found the girl that can make me put down my rampaging streak.

It is not easy esp when we know we have the ability to do it and moreover when we "fail on a mission" we get even more pumped up to conquer her or other girls.. failure doesnt get us down it only spur us on.. which actually make matter worse in this case..

But i dont know.. one day i just woke up and feel that it's meaningless to do this anymore.. whats the point of conquering 1, 10, 100, 1000 or 1M of them? Theres no meaning to it.. maybe there is a preset quota or timeframe within all of us which we are not aware of.. maybe one day when your quota is reached you might just "wake up" from it all..

For now just continue doing whatever you want and feel like doing bcos ultimately the most impt thing in life is to be happy.. but at least im happy for you bcos you are starting to have the realisation of the meaningless of all these shenenigans which mean you would be able to quit soon..

Do update us on your progress bro..

Goodluck~

[happywoody]

I'm "winning" the gamble but not exactly winning either.

Not sure if I make sense...

the path of excess will lead to the tower of wisdom

[Cheesebeast]

Maybe you're not ready to settle down yet...

[Ladyrain]

What is it in your current gf which makes you want to commit and stop the addiction?

[winstonlyj]

Bro on the contrary it is actually hard to quit when you are winning not losing..

I'm just like you but I've been in cold turkey for the past one year because i've found the girl that can make me put down my rampaging streak.

It is not easy esp when we know we have the ability to do it and moreover when we "fail on a mission" we get even more pumped up to conquer her or other girls.. failure doesnt get us down it only spur us on.. which actually make matter worse in this case..

But i dont know.. one day i just woke up and feel that it's meaningless to do this anymore.. whats the point of conquering 1, 10, 100, 1000 or 1M of them? Theres no meaning to it.. maybe there is a preset quota or timeframe within all of us which we are not aware of.. maybe one day when your quota is reached you might just "wake up" from it all..

For now just continue doing whatever you want and feel like doing bcos ultimately the most impt thing in life is to be happy.. but at least im happy for you bcos you are starting to have the realisation of the meaningless of all these shenenigans which mean you would be able to quit soon..

Do update us on your progress bro..

Goodluck~

Impressed. You have aptly empathized my situation. It's not really easy road forward, like you have said. But I've a plan in mind and will keep you all posted :-)

[winstonlyj]

the path of excess will lead to the tower of wisdom

Words of wisdom. Have you been on a similar route? Have you found your light?

[winstonlyj]

What is it in your current gf which makes you want to commit and stop the addiction?

When I see my future, there's only her in my vision.
Sorry. This is hard to answer satisfactorily; i cannot put a finger on a particular reason(s).

[*FiReWoRkS*]

Impressed. You have aptly empathized my situation. It's not really easy road forward, like you have said. But I've a plan in mind and will keep you all posted :-)

What's the plan bro?

If you don't mind me asking.

In a way we are on the same kind of boat so was thinking it would be good if we could share our ideas and thoughts.

Cheers.

[happywoody]

Words of wisdom. Have you been on a similar route? Have you found your light?

been there, done that.
but not necessarily the wiser for it.

i guess my approach is never say never.
as each new temptation may turn out to be even more compelling than the last.

if u've made a commitment, then don't give up.
even if u falter, fight your way back to the straight line.

the only easy day was yesterday.

[MoeLanYong]

Dear SBF bros,

I got into the hunting mood for fbs, ONS about 3-4 years ago.
Started off with about 1-2 flings every 3months and after awhile, I'm picking up gals every other week almost like my second nature... All these while attached.

I enjoy the challenge, the bonks, the achievement of conquering random "guai" looking gals, public fucking, recounting my sexperience to acquaintances, etc. But I'm trying to settle down now as i want to commit to my relationship and I can't get rid of this addiction...

Any bros in similar situation?
Any advice?

Hi TS,
What you said resonated with me, hence this post. I have been through that stage. Not proud of it. Lets just call it a period where one sows his wild oats. At the back of my head, I knew it was my gf that I loved. Those flings and easy meats are just a passing fad. I told myself, when in my 20s, I want to do the things that 20 year olds do. Have fun. Go wild wild west. When in my 30s, I want to do the things normal 30 year olds do. Settle down, get married. Ditto 40s and 50s.

So when the time came, when I turned 30, I married my gf and turned my back on those easy preys. The cold turkey was not easy. There were withdrawals. I cut all associations with the women kind and tried to make myself as ugly as possible by dressing down, being rude etc. I turned to my religion for strength and direction. I was not 100 percent successful. There were 2 other women in the course of my marriage, and I will bear these scars for the rest of my life. Other than this, I am now happily married to my wife. She is my best friend. Now, we still hold hands and date every week after 17 years of marriage. We have 4 kids. So our time is spent devoting ourselves to each other and our kids. Life cannot be more blissful.

I guess what I am saying is, its ok to have an ugly past. We guys may not have done things right. But if our hearts are set in the right place, we will know what to do when the time comes. Don't give up on yourself. You have a glorious future. But you need to choose wisely with your head, not your dick. You need to know when to stop. I hope that by sharing my experience, it can help you. I wish you all the best, my friend :)

[MoeLanYong]

been there, done that.
but not necessarily the wiser for it.

i guess my approach is never say never.
as each new temptation may turn out to be even more compelling than the last.

if u've made a commitment, then don't give up.
even if u falter, fight your way back to the straight line.

the only easy day was yesterday.

Thoroughly understand and agree with what you wrote. My religion taught me a new way. FLEE temptations. Don't even bother trying to psycho yourself not to get tempted. The flesh is weak. Just FLEE. No lunch alone with a woman. No one to one work meetings. After work, no clubbing, just go straight home. Tomorrow, fight to do same thing.

[Datingafter35]

What powderful. Can I buy you lunch and pick your brain? I've learned the game for 3 years and got laid only one from online dating.

I've never been to approach any women but I'm not fat just not competent to be a husband. I can feed myself though.

[happywoody]

Thoroughly understand and agree with what you wrote. My religion taught me a new way. FLEE temptations. Don't even bother trying to psycho yourself not to get tempted. The flesh is weak. Just FLEE. No lunch alone with a woman. No one to one work meetings. After work, no clubbing, just go straight home. Tomorrow, fight to do same thing.

i feel u too bro.
someone wise once said "it's easier not to get in than to get out".

i've not come to that wisdom yet