Quote:
Originally Posted by seoseo
you got this so perfectly correct. While happy ending is possible, maybe one in a million but I think for most of us, it's realistically stupid to do so when we do have the opportunity to find better stuffs as it goes along.
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Hahaha, correct because apart from reading about the other bros' experiences, I went through most of them myself. Hate to use this phrase but "been there, done that".
Bro, I see that you are now fantasizing about various "plans" to test her reaction, thinking about whether to go MIA, etc, etc. I think this relationship is really bothering you a lot at this point in time.
I only have three words for you; let it go.
In your current state of mind, it is normally difficult to analyse matters logically. Let me try to help by going through a series of questions.
Assuming she did not love you at all, why should you get so worked up and emotional over this so-called relationship? What is it that you are after? You want to possess her and make her yours exclusively? If that is the case, are you really in love with her or merely want to own her? For most people, a strong degree of pride is involved. Pride in the sense that you do not like to lose.
Assuming she really was in love with you. The next question is then what? Are you going to marry her and live together happily ever after? Are you going to migrate to China or is she prepared to uproot from her immediate social circle and move over to Singapore? Even if she wants to move over to Singapore, getting citizenship or permanent residence status is not so easy even if you are married.
While I am not a Buddhist, I understand that one of the teachings is to recognise that all things are impermanent. The greater the desire to possess something, the greater your misery. Only if you are able to let it go, would you be able to reduce your misery. I would be grateful if the Buddhists amongst us could correct me if I am wrong on the above.
Just enjoy the memories of what you had and let it go bro. Makes life easier and happier for all concerned.
And I also agree with ShittyAss that you shouldn't just simply MIA. Must have some pride mah. I think you can even tell her that since there is no possibility of a happy ending between the two of you, you feel that it would be better to stop seeing each other. Even if you have to cut off ties, my personal view is that it can and should be done gracefully. Calm, logical, dignified.