i am a sinful person

[ang076]

Go to HC/RLD for sex is not sinful... as long as you treated gals with respect , donate to charity can ward off sin to a certain extent.


However, I feel that this thread is not relevant to this subforum.

[fbee]

To leeky,

whether cheonging is a sin is a subjective question. We all end in this path to indirectly solve some of our subconscious problems (some of which even we don't know) - it could be loneliness and isolation, rejection, regret of some past decisions, fear, stress, the urge for power and recognition, childhood problems... these are all reflected in our current behavior in different ways. Ironically, it becomes a 'physical need' ONLY when we allow it be one. once we make cheonging a 'habit' we certainly have this 'physical need'. It's been ultimately our choice, initially.

For now, the best is that you internally accept yourself and whatever you have done first. Once you accept yourself (religious activity is one possible way, others include sports, healthy diets, learning a new skill, travel), any change becomes easier because you could then 'like' yourself better. If you don't accept yourself (which you sound like from the way you wrote), you are in the 'giving up' mode and your life is sure to spiral down (at least psychologically). You need to take a step backward and breathe, then you can think clearly and won't be guided solely by bad 'habits'.

I think just getting a GF won't solve the problem entirely, unless your GF happens to be a good listener and is not the very self-centered type. Plus, the cheonging days probably made you view women somewhat like commodities, and this could be the root of an unhealthy relationship in the future. I think you should try solve the fundamental problem first a bit more before getting a GF, by actively talking to friends (you at least have one or two rite?), going to church or temple if you like to, reading up on non-work hobbyish stuff. There are plenty of stuff to do besides HC or FLs. Spend time with family and good people you have met, not with FLs or the paid girls, who just take your money and laugh at you at the back. "If you want to be rewarded in life you have to FACE IT directly and SEEK TO TAKE CONTROL." Going back to your old bad habit is merely an escape and is a sign of defeat. The turning point is always tough but you should hang in there..

[ct75]

My Diagnosis is the following...

1) U are addicted to sex hence the guilt felt after a bonking session.....
2) Having a gf will solve nothing cos u will end up treating her like a bonking object
3) U may be suffering from depression which I seriously advise you to seek help for....
4) What some bros say is rite.. try to stop coming here into this forum, avoid porn... they give u the weirdest ideas.
5) Try doing something to keep you occupied like exercise and all
6) Im not a very religious fellow but if it helps u to pray then go ahead.... but please dont go thinking rubbish like GOD is going to punish u for your sins and all.... God if he or she is as merciful as what all religions say will be alot more forgiving and understanding than we idiots.... The punishment part is most likely religious leaders trying to scare their flock into total obediance.....
7) Finally dont go do charity cos u feel it as an escape... do it cos you want to do it.

[worldwidealf]

dude, i understand how you feel

you probably need to talk to a psychologist to get help
otherwise you can't solve the problem

but welcome to chat with me if you want

[glfingers]

It's a good start that you know you are suffering. Suffering exists for everyone. It's also good that you want the suffering to stop. I have good news for you. The suffering CAN stop. The suffering stops when you don't crave for things that are superficial, temporary and unimportant to your life.
The suffering lessens when you accept that your suffering is the result of your own ignorance. Once that ignorance is corrected,( ie you get smarter) you will feel better.

The next time you need to for a prostitute. Remember these three words: IT WILL PASS.
Don't suppress the urge. It will resurface anyway. Just understand that, even if you don't fuck a chicken, your urge will pass. Once you trust that it will pass, there's little point in wasting your money.

These three words (IT WILL PASS) has been working for me so far.