Would you mind?

[siamburox]

Hey bros,

Just wanna hear your opinion with regards to this issue. I am together with my new girlfriend for about three months now, it seems that i can't seem to stop thinking about the ex bfs that she used to have. Even though she is completely loyal to me, but there is still a stint of jealousy whenever i think about how she isn't a virgin anymore and i am not the first person that has had her. I never used to have problems with any of my exs similar to this, what is going on with me? I really can't stop thinking about the fact that she isn't a virgin anymore. It's making me over suspicious over every little detail of our daily lives and to an extent that it is driving me crazy. Any advice?:(

[Pilot Preceda]

if you really love her, you don't really care if she's a virgin...
I bet you're not a virgin either...

[sentsggirls]

if really care and love her , then dun bother much about her downsouth , is what inside her heart is more important.

[kyutake]

Love is only physical to a certain extent but infinite when it comes from the heart. If you love her, what has happen in the past should be let gone. Never dwindle in the past for it only makes you more shallow =)

[siamburox]

thanks for the replies bros, but i really would like to know how to go along trying to not " mind ". it's really heart wrenching to see her ex around knowing that he has bedded her before.

[MasP]

It proved tht u may not really in love with her! Since it is only 3 months, stop the relationship or else, u wil b in greater pain once yr LOVE reduced. U will wonder more at tht time?????

[alan0338]

then how u going to get married in the future, :eek: dun think so easy to get a virgin liao :p

[arsenal_84]

stop having double standards in your life...it will make life easier on yourself.

for example:
if i'm not a virgin myself, last thing i want is a virgin partner.

[innuendo]

thanks for the replies bros, but i really would like to know how to go along trying to not " mind ". it's really heart wrenching to see her ex around knowing that he has bedded her before.

Wake the fuck up and stop being an idiot. You should feel lucky to have her now, and for the future, unless you keep thinking about retarded insignificant things like this. In fact, you should be thankful that she's been around, and has ended up choosing you (for now). I know what you mean; I had the same insecurities, but got over them once I grew a pair.

I used to think love was about being her first, but really, it's about being her last. Think about it.

[Stud00]

Dear TS,

Wake the FUCK up.... i am writing this to u, firstly, i doubt u r a virgin..and since u r not, who are u to judge or even "condemn" her? the fact that she is open enuff to share with u all this things, is becos she trusts u and loves u. but u in turn, becos of ur puny male ego chose to judge her?

Wake the fuck up.. or dump her, she deserves much better then u..

[see see only]

Wah TS,

Let me guess she must be a very green & innocent girl but yet very obliging when come to sex si bo ... :)

So much so that you felt that she should only belong to you. :D

Nevertheless bro ... she is your girlfriend now, she belong with you not belong to you :) .... soul search a bit, mate

[flowerboy888]

It is good, that she tell you the truth.

[johndoe8808]

Dear TS,

Wake the FUCK up.... i am writing this to u, firstly, i doubt u r a virgin..and since u r not, who are u to judge or even "condemn" her? the fact that she is open enuff to share with u all this things, is becos she trusts u and loves u. but u in turn, becos of ur puny male ego chose to judge her?

Wake the fuck up.. or dump her, she deserves much better then u..

wonderful advice.
if only more people can be more straight up, the world will be a better place.

[prccuntlover]

Wake the fuck up and stop being an idiot. You should feel lucky to have her now, and for the future, unless you keep thinking about retarded insignificant things like this. In fact, you should be thankful that she's been around, and has ended up choosing you (for now). I know what you mean; I had the same insecurities, but got over them once I grew a pair.

I used to think love was about being her first, but really, it's about being her last. Think about it.

agreed about the "last" thing
i din last and its pretty sad
so treasure whatever or rather whoever is in front of you...

[abchow]

HI TS .

Now the issue is your insecurity . Lets face it . Its like a competition out there.
So now u have to compete against her ex bf . ( in your mind).

Learn how to accept it and deal with this insecurity issue. You should be telling yourself that you have this girl as your girl friend and proud to show her off.

Even if your girl and her ex do cross path one day. Just be a gentleman and act gracious.

No need to act hostile or uncomfortable . We are all adults . So if you can handle all this emotional well, then your girl friend will be impressed and her ex will be pissed off. ( if he still feel anything for your gal).

Emotions can be a issue when its out of control. So learn to deal with it and learn to love your girl friend well. In time she will only have you in her heart and mind.

good luck!!

[K9696]

Hey bros,

Just wanna hear your opinion with regards to this issue. I am together with my new girlfriend for about three months now, it seems that i can't seem to stop thinking about the ex bfs that she used to have. Even though she is completely loyal to me, but there is still a stint of jealousy whenever i think about how she isn't a virgin anymore and i am not the first person that has had her. I never used to have problems with any of my exs similar to this, what is going on with me? I really can't stop thinking about the fact that she isn't a virgin anymore. It's making me over suspicious over every little detail of our daily lives and to an extent that it is driving me crazy. Any advice?:(

Bro..
Are you really in LOVE or just interested in her cunt:confused:

Check yourself..:D

Keep yourself occupy and surf less sbf and see less porno..

[burningicez]

U can buy virginity implant u know?

[eternally]

1 thing to ask yourself..do you love her?

If yes, love her for who she is now and forget about her past.
Many of us have pasts, those are pasts already & why are you keep looking at past & not the present.

[niteowl]

Hey bros,

Just wanna hear your opinion with regards to this issue. I am together with my new girlfriend for about three months now, it seems that i can't seem to stop thinking about the ex bfs that she used to have. Even though she is completely loyal to me, but there is still a stint of jealousy whenever i think about how she isn't a virgin anymore and i am not the first person that has had her. I never used to have problems with any of my exs similar to this, what is going on with me? I really can't stop thinking about the fact that she isn't a virgin anymore. It's making me over suspicious over every little detail of our daily lives and to an extent that it is driving me crazy. Any advice?:(


Just as a coin has two sides. You mind about her virginity, how will your girlfriend think of yours :confused: Most probably, you are not deep in love with her. Once lost, then you learn to treasure will be TOO LATE :rolleyes:

[LoveAngel]

... I am together with my new girlfriend for about three months now, it seems that i can't seem to stop thinking about the ex bfs that she used to have. Even though she is completely loyal to me, but there is still a stint of jealousy whenever i think about how she isn't a virgin anymore and i am not the first person that has had her. I never used to have problems with any of my exs similar to this, what is going on with me? I really can't stop thinking about the fact that she isn't a virgin anymore. It's making me over suspicious over every little detail of our daily lives and to an extent that it is driving me crazy. Any advice?:(

Your GF must be a beautiful girl.

And if I'm your gf, I'll leave immediately.
Will there be happiness if you can't even trust her at all?
She has TRUSTED you with her honesty and her past.
And she is COMPLETELY LOYAL to you now!
So what is your problem??

She shared the truth of her past, because she trusted you, she loved you.
Why are you allowing yourself to indulge in such selfish and self-righteous thoughts?
Why do you even want to continue the relationship if this is eating into you??

You are letting your own insecurity destroy your chance at happiness.
You are letting your own paranoia destroy her self-worth and dignity.

To be honest, I'm seriously really upset with the way you think now.
Please pardon me, but I am in the exact situation your GF is in right now.
And my BF thinks exactly the same way as you.
And it's making me absolutely exasperated, helpless & vulnerable.
I do not know how to help you, just like I do not know how to help my bf.

I tried assuring him, I even stopped talking to those guys he is insecure about, but he could never forget it.
Every once in a while, he will haunt me with it, just as it drives him crazy too.
So can you tell us what we can do to help you & him get over it??

The only way I can think of now, is to leave.
Do you wanna wait till you lose her then you wake up?
It's the past. Stop dwelling in the past.
What's important is what is she now.
If you truly love her as you claim, then do something about your insecurity.
If you can't, then I beg you, leave her and let her go find another man who will give her the fullest respect and intergrity.

You can TRUST without LOVING, but you can’t LOVE without TRUSTING!

p/s: TS, I'm sorry about my outburst .... I'm not at you personally but I really do hope you spare a thought for her feelings too. You must be willing to forgive her past otherwise there's no future at all. We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.

[niteowl]

TS, can see that you are a self-centred and greedy in nature person. To wipe out your insecurity, I suggest before you go into any relationship please make sure that your gf is a virgin. I am sure that will solve your problem totally :cool:

[dyelook]

You can TRUST without LOVING, but you can’t LOVE without TRUSTING!

YESssssss....;)

[Ichigo_Kurosaki]

You can TRUST without LOVING, but you can’t LOVE without TRUSTING!

Love without trusting is called Possessive

Once a while, we tend to behave as such but better to realise this selfish behavior now then to regret later. ;)

[Crazyfowl]

Hey bros,

Just wanna hear your opinion with regards to this issue. I am together with my new girlfriend for about three months now, it seems that i can't seem to stop thinking about the ex bfs that she used to have. Even though she is completely loyal to me, but there is still a stint of jealousy whenever i think about how she isn't a virgin anymore and i am not the first person that has had her. I never used to have problems with any of my exs similar to this, what is going on with me? I really can't stop thinking about the fact that she isn't a virgin anymore. It's making me over suspicious over every little detail of our daily lives and to an extent that it is driving me crazy. Any advice?:(

Bro mind me asking you how many girls have you fucked before her???
And I suposed she's not the last that you're going to fuck

Be fair to her ,,,If you cannot forget her past then tell her she can be only your Fb and not your GF

[paul^bibi^baby]

As long as you're her Last, it is very fortunate le.

Unless you want to find a virgin gf whom you are her first, and many coming up behind you ?

Virginity is over-rated, now what era liao. Happy Jiu Hao !

[horny03]

Forget the past, live for the present, plan for the future.

[aqcmme]

A man always wants to the woman's first stop.

A woman always wants to the the man's last.

i said my piece, your call.

[feelmetonight]

Your GF must be a beautiful girl.

And if I'm your gf, I'll leave immediately.
Will there be happiness if you can't even trust her at all?
She has TRUSTED you with her honesty and her past.
And she is COMPLETELY LOYAL to you now!
So what is your problem??

She shared the truth of her past, because she trusted you, she loved you.
Why are you allowing yourself to indulge in such selfish and self-righteous thoughts?
Why do you even want to continue the relationship if this is eating into you??

You are letting your own insecurity destroy your chance at happiness.
You are letting your own paranoia destroy her self-worth and dignity.

To be honest, I'm seriously really upset with the way you think now.
Please pardon me, but I am in the exact situation your GF is in right now.
And my BF thinks exactly the same way as you.
And it's making me absolutely exasperated, helpless & vulnerable.
I do not know how to help you, just like I do not know how to help my bf.

I tried assuring him, I even stopped talking to those guys he is insecure about, but he could never forget it.
Every once in a while, he will haunt me with it, just as it drives him crazy too.
So can you tell us what we can do to help you & him get over it??

The only way I can think of now, is to leave.
Do you wanna wait till you lose her then you wake up?
It's the past. Stop dwelling in the past.
What's important is what is she now.
If you truly love her as you claim, then do something about your insecurity.
If you can't, then I beg you, leave her and let her go find another man who will give her the fullest respect and intergrity.

You can TRUST without LOVING, but you can’t LOVE without TRUSTING!

p/s: TS, I'm sorry about my outburst .... I'm not at you personally but I really do hope you spare a thought for her feelings too. You must be willing to forgive her past otherwise there's no future at all. We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.


Absolutly agree!!!

Nobody is perfect. There is no point being bothered by something you cant change.

Respect and love her as who she is.

[remote]

To TS,
I understand how you feeling now...i myself is with my gf whom once had a history and she herself is disgraced by it. Many times i felt disgusted by her past and histories and it will normally end up in a heated argument.

After she told me abt her past, many times i added salt to her wounds which is very childish of me and as times goes by, i keep asking myself why such a decent girl will commit such disgusting acts? It only make me more angry and harsher my words to her. It break my heart now thinking how i treated her before.

I wasnt exactly a decent guy either, after i knew abt my gf's past, i back again to my regular ktv session and was involved with a singer while with my gf. Yes....i admit i'm a two timer...living in my own fairy world that lasted for 6 months that the singer and i will have something good happen. Neither does the singer know i got a gf at that point of time cos almost everyday i went up to the joint to visit her. After her term finished, i even went back to China with her for a month and had a romping good time with lots of promise etc. Haizz...indeed i am blinded by 'love' and was so happy with her but sadly, it ended suddenly with no head no tail and till now, i still dun know how and why it ended. Just FYI, its nothing to do with money or materials...i guess its the trust issue.

After i broke up with the singer and was very depressed by it, guess who stood by my side and cheer me up during that time? You guess it...it is my innocent gf who knew nuts abt this matter. She just know i am very unhappy without knowing why and to cheer me up, she once wake up very early in the morning to bake different flavour of cheesecake and send them to me after her work. I am deeply touched and i felt like a big bastard lying to her. After i got the cheesecake, i just broke down and hug her tight. It is that moment i know what is right and what is wrong.

Who dun have a past or a history? Matter most is one willing to change and turn over a new leaf now at this moment.

I learnt my lesson and self reflected on my sins. Now, we are very happily together spending time never to talk abt the past nor think abt it. Finally one day, i made up my mind and brought her to visit my parents and they like her to bits. We had also just selected our flat and wedding bells will be ringing next yr.

I remember a bro saying this...it not the exact words but it goes something like this; "Those whom had not sinned cast the first stone." I not a christian BTW but indeed, this few words does strike deep into my heart and mind.

[LoveAngel]

..... guess who stood by my side and cheer me up during that time? You guess it...it is my innocent gf who knew nuts abt this matter. She just know i am very unhappy without knowing why and to cheer me up, she once wake up very early in the morning to bake different flavour of cheesecake and send them to me after her work. I am deeply touched and i felt like a big bastard lying to her. After i got the cheesecake, i just broke down and hug her tight. It is that moment i know what is right and what is wrong.

Who dun have a past or a history? Matter most is one willing to change and turn over a new leaf now at this moment.

I learnt my lesson and self reflected on my sins. Now, we are very happily together spending time never to talk abt the past nor think abt it. Finally one day, i made up my mind and brought her to visit my parents and they like her to bits. We had also just selected our flat and wedding bells will be ringing next yr.

Hello Remote,
Thanks for sharing your story with us. It warms my heart & brought a tear to my eye to read about how through your own failings, you are able to see beyond, understand, forgive & forget the past, and see clearly your girlfriend's heart to embrace the meaning of true love & forgiveness.

It is also encouraging to read that there is still a 2nd chance in this world.
I'm really glad you have woken up in time to see the real beauty & the new person in your girlfriend.

Remember, another parable ... "why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?"

Cherish the love you had yesterday; that you still have today and look forward to cherishing the love you shall have tomorrow.

Congrats! :)

[remote]

Hello Remote,
Thanks for sharing your story with us. It warms my heart & brought a tear to my eye to read about how through your own failings, you are able to see beyond, understand, forgive & forget the past, and see clearly your girlfriend's heart to embrace the meaning of true love & forgiveness.

It is also encouraging to read that there is still a 2nd chance in this world.
I'm really glad you have woken up in time to see the real beauty & the new person in your girlfriend.

Remember, another parable ... "why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?"

Cherish the love you had yesterday; that you still have today and look forward to cherishing the love you shall have tomorrow.

Congrats! :)

Hello LoveAngel,
By bringing my story up is not to show the world how great i am but rather, a mere human being like the rest of the world.

If TS is still very much bothered by your gf's past then i would suggest you to leave it cos there is nothing at all she can do about it.

She is ,in fact, more upset and angry at herself than anyone else in the world but sad reality is she cant turn back time.

I was very foolish before to keep on rudding salt into her wounds and keep digging up her past while i myself isnt a clean sheet of paper.

No one is perfect and to err is human but no one can ever turn back time. What we can only do is to move on and embrace life as it is now. I did and now life is good for me n my gf....knowing that we will stand by each other side is the perfect ending.

Honestly, the more you know the more upset you will be so think logically and ask yourself, what r the benefits to prode on deeper and let it linger around your mind? I can tell you this for sure....nothing.

[ari212121]

A man always wants to the woman's first stop.

A woman always wants to the the man's last.

i said my piece, your call.
totally agreed.

[RealEstateGuy]

To TS,
I understand how you feeling now...i myself is with my gf whom once had a history and she herself is disgraced by it. Many times i felt disgusted by her past and histories and it will normally end up in a heated argument.

After she told me abt her past, many times i added salt to her wounds which is very childish of me and as times goes by, i keep asking myself why such a decent girl will commit such disgusting acts? It only make me more angry and harsher my words to her. It break my heart now thinking how i treated her before.

I wasnt exactly a decent guy either, after i knew abt my gf's past, i back again to my regular ktv session and was involved with a singer while with my gf. Yes....i admit i'm a two timer...living in my own fairy world that lasted for 6 months that the singer and i will have something good happen. Neither does the singer know i got a gf at that point of time cos almost everyday i went up to the joint to visit her. After her term finished, i even went back to China with her for a month and had a romping good time with lots of promise etc. Haizz...indeed i am blinded by 'love' and was so happy with her but sadly, it ended suddenly with no head no tail and till now, i still dun know how and why it ended. Just FYI, its nothing to do with money or materials...i guess its the trust issue.

After i broke up with the singer and was very depressed by it, guess who stood by my side and cheer me up during that time? You guess it...it is my innocent gf who knew nuts abt this matter. She just know i am very unhappy without knowing why and to cheer me up, she once wake up very early in the morning to bake different flavour of cheesecake and send them to me after her work. I am deeply touched and i felt like a big bastard lying to her. After i got the cheesecake, i just broke down and hug her tight. It is that moment i know what is right and what is wrong.

Who dun have a past or a history? Matter most is one willing to change and turn over a new leaf now at this moment.

I learnt my lesson and self reflected on my sins. Now, we are very happily together spending time never to talk abt the past nor think abt it. Finally one day, i made up my mind and brought her to visit my parents and they like her to bits. We had also just selected our flat and wedding bells will be ringing next yr.

I remember a bro saying this...it not the exact words but it goes something like this; "Those whom had not sinned cast the first stone." I not a christian BTW but indeed, this few words does strike deep into my heart and mind.

Congratulations brother. What a wonderful story of love. A unique and wonderful Singporean love story.

[Stud00]

Whatever u appreciate, would appreciate in value, and whatever you don't appreciate.. would deappreicate in value. Ts, you ain't perfect, so what makes you think u are fit to cast stones at your gf? If i am you, i would start waking up my idea and start loving her. Treasure her before u lose her. We all have our bad pasts and stuff, don't we? start loving her future..and stop living in her past, and if u r there to remind her of her past.. honestly, u dont deserve her.. The grass aint greener on the other side.. it just seem greener.. and if you are dumb enuff to think u deserve better, then go ahead, do her a big favour n dump her. She would manage much better without u.

It's true that those in a relationship, don't know hw to treasure what they have and they take their mates for granted, wherelse those that r single r so dying n praying for someone to share that love with, but all they get is all the bitches and jerks... what ironic?

And if you are pissed and wanna zap me.. by all means.. go ahead.. it doesnt matter.. i am just doing you a favour by pointing out the truth behind your disgusting ego thoughts..

[Reoxy]

It is that moment i know what is right and what is wrong.

I remember a bro saying this...it not the exact words but it goes something like this; "Those whom had not sinned cast the first stone." I not a christian BTW but indeed, this few words does strike deep into my heart and mind.

I am very touched by your story.

浪子回头金不换，
衣锦还乡做贤人。

[NewMike1304k]

The ability to "not mind" may also be from your take in life. (This is of course just a personal opinion). Most guys hate to share and always want to be first. But in a way, having a virgin or having a virgin gf or wife... is it such a big deal? I had a virgin gf before and it gave me lots of stress and pressure because I jad taken her first and had to "take" that responsibility. She was not all that nice as a gf and I was almost glad to let her go. Then all the "stress and responsibility" also lifted.

Now my take on it is that, it is better for her to experience anything and everything she wants... what is past will remain in the past... But she has learnt how and what pleasure is and it is with me that we share this pleasure from now on.

Maybe it is just me lah.

[wells]

Cherish her if she is loyal and good to you. Why stress about her past? In your past i bet its not so clean either. There is no ending in choosing the right love.

[aqcmme]

my wife is no virgin when i met her; if it makes you feel better TS. And i am going to bet more than 5 out of 10 bros married non virgins.

Sexual experience is a good thing these days. Dun ya think? chill dude, its fine, you are better in bed i am sure. :rolleyes:

[Javanoob]

i mind, so since i am not the 1st in line.
i make sure i the largest in line. fuck her X time more then everyone infront.

nbcb and force her say their name while i fuck her. its high try it.:D

[Stud00]

Brother, i salute u. You made mistakes, but u got the balls to admit it. for that i salute u. :)



To TS,
I understand how you feeling now...i myself is with my gf whom once had a history and she herself is disgraced by it. Many times i felt disgusted by her past and histories and it will normally end up in a heated argument.

After she told me abt her past, many times i added salt to her wounds which is very childish of me and as times goes by, i keep asking myself why such a decent girl will commit such disgusting acts? It only make me more angry and harsher my words to her. It break my heart now thinking how i treated her before.

I wasnt exactly a decent guy either, after i knew abt my gf's past, i back again to my regular ktv session and was involved with a singer while with my gf. Yes....i admit i'm a two timer...living in my own fairy world that lasted for 6 months that the singer and i will have something good happen. Neither does the singer know i got a gf at that point of time cos almost everyday i went up to the joint to visit her. After her term finished, i even went back to China with her for a month and had a romping good time with lots of promise etc. Haizz...indeed i am blinded by 'love' and was so happy with her but sadly, it ended suddenly with no head no tail and till now, i still dun know how and why it ended. Just FYI, its nothing to do with money or materials...i guess its the trust issue.

After i broke up with the singer and was very depressed by it, guess who stood by my side and cheer me up during that time? You guess it...it is my innocent gf who knew nuts abt this matter. She just know i am very unhappy without knowing why and to cheer me up, she once wake up very early in the morning to bake different flavour of cheesecake and send them to me after her work. I am deeply touched and i felt like a big bastard lying to her. After i got the cheesecake, i just broke down and hug her tight. It is that moment i know what is right and what is wrong.

Who dun have a past or a history? Matter most is one willing to change and turn over a new leaf now at this moment.

I learnt my lesson and self reflected on my sins. Now, we are very happily together spending time never to talk abt the past nor think abt it. Finally one day, i made up my mind and brought her to visit my parents and they like her to bits. We had also just selected our flat and wedding bells will be ringing next yr.

I remember a bro saying this...it not the exact words but it goes something like this; "Those whom had not sinned cast the first stone." I not a christian BTW but indeed, this few words does strike deep into my heart and mind.

[edgar18]

Well said bro

[edgar18]

To TS,
I understand how you feeling now...i myself is with my gf whom once had a history and she herself is disgraced by it. Many times i felt disgusted by her past and histories and it will normally end up in a heated argument.

After she told me abt her past, many times i added salt to her wounds which is very childish of me and as times goes by, i keep asking myself why such a decent girl will commit such disgusting acts? It only make me more angry and harsher my words to her. It break my heart now thinking how i treated her before.

I wasnt exactly a decent guy either, after i knew abt my gf's past, i back again to my regular ktv session and was involved with a singer while with my gf. Yes....i admit i'm a two timer...living in my own fairy world that lasted for 6 months that the singer and i will have something good happen. Neither does the singer know i got a gf at that point of time cos almost everyday i went up to the joint to visit her. After her term finished, i even went back to China with her for a month and had a romping good time with lots of promise etc. Haizz...indeed i am blinded by 'love' and was so happy with her but sadly, it ended suddenly with no head no tail and till now, i still dun know how and why it ended. Just FYI, its nothing to do with money or materials...i guess its the trust issue.

After i broke up with the singer and was very depressed by it, guess who stood by my side and cheer me up during that time? You guess it...it is my innocent gf who knew nuts abt this matter. She just know i am very unhappy without knowing why and to cheer me up, she once wake up very early in the morning to bake different flavour of cheesecake and send them to me after her work. I am deeply touched and i felt like a big bastard lying to her. After i got the cheesecake, i just broke down and hug her tight. It is that moment i know what is right and what is wrong.

Who dun have a past or a history? Matter most is one willing to change and turn over a new leaf now at this moment.

I learnt my lesson and self reflected on my sins. Now, we are very happily together spending time never to talk abt the past nor think abt it. Finally one day, i made up my mind and brought her to visit my parents and they like her to bits. We had also just selected our flat and wedding bells will be ringing next yr.

I remember a bro saying this...it not the exact words but it goes something like this; "Those whom had not sinned cast the first stone." I not a christian BTW but indeed, this few words does strike deep into my heart and mind.

Well said bro

[nubox]

It is not what lies in the past, but what lies ahead.

everyone has a past, so just look beyond that and move on.

[MonteCristo]

thanks for the replies bros, but i really would like to know how to go along trying to not " mind ". it's really heart wrenching to see her ex around knowing that he has bedded her before.

Since you would like to know how to go along trying to not "mind", it means you are trying to let it work out. Fair enough, I will give my 2 cents in hope that it will help you and your gf.

In order not to mind, give your gf total trust. Believe her and have faith that your relationship will work out. Faith makes things happen.

I presume, you are jealous because you feel inferior to your gf, and that you believe her ex is a better choice than you. Well, she has chosen you as her bf and not seek reconciliation with her ex(es) because she loves you wholeheartedly. Do not treat her love lightly. Honour it with your unbreakable faith and love in her. The fact that she chose you over them now means she believes you are her uniquely right guy. Don't lose sight of this fact. You are more qualified than the others guys before you in her life to make her happy, or rather, you are the only qualified guy to bring her happiness or hurt; since she has placed that choice in your hands.

Sense of inferiority can be cured - by bettering yourself continuously. Not only by bettering yourself, by reinforcing the love you have for her; and her love for you. When you find that she means more to you than you yourself, and that you mean more to her than her herself, your problem will cease to exist.

Of course, this is going to be very tough. If you do not think you can do all that, just let her go. I am sure it will be much less troublesome and mentally exhausting to free both of you from the emotional shackles now than say few months down the road when you two hate each other's guts out.

[mona]

This gal is in love with u if not she wont tell u abt her virginity. She trust u so she let u know. Remember it is not easy for a gal to tell a guy she has been boonk before. Treat her well and everything will be fine.