My search for a Friend With Benefits - Story
 

First of all, I would like to thank some bros here who offered valuable advice when I was very down. I won't mention names but you all know who you are.

And for those find it difficult to find a fwb, hang in there because it will happen. At my age (30s), I feel women look for men who can laugh with them and make them laugh. Be honest and respectful.

Do not be disheartened if you fail. Take it as a learning stage. Try again if you fail. Persistence is the key to many successes.

And that was how a strictly platonic friendship became one with benefits.

Enjoy!

Re: My search for a fwb
 

I was a faithful guy. Never cheated except for the occasional visits to FLs to get some release because of frequent rejections and occasional anger. Now will that be considered cheating? I do enjoy the BBBJs from FLs cos I don't get a lot of it at home. After reading about risks of unprotected oral sex, I've stopped requesting for BBBJs. I have been very careful not to let my wife know about my visits. I believe she isn't aware.

2014 was a bad year for me. Into my x year of marriage, I started to suspect something was going on with my wife. To cut the story short, I found out about her 'affair' with a colleague. Why 'affair' with quotes? It's because I couldn't bear to dig deep into details. I just want to act on it, stop it and forget it. I don't want to know if they did anything and any of those details. You can say I'm in denial but what's the point of knowing if the damage has already been done? I was damn angry. I have also confronted the guy.

A few weeks after the confrontation, I decided that I wanted out of the marriage but she refused. I wondered why. I don't think it's about the kids; more like an embarrassment to her because she was very proud to be married young, way before most of her peers.

I still live in bitterness but people have said, time heals all wounds.

Wounds somehow have healed, not because of time but because of someone else.

What I'm going to write is almost true, just some adjustments made to hide identities.

Re: My search for a fwb
 

For me, i do not believe that time will heal all wounds but rather just make my heart more numb.

Also issues like this will rise to the surface again should u 2 disagree on something in the future.

The pain will be lessen if she did apologize and ask for forgiveness.

I read also that you found someone else as a form of emotional ji tuo.

Any idea if she is still seeing that particular guy u had a confrontation with.

A song i hear when i was betrayed some years ago.

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All in all i hope things work out for u bro. :cool:

Re: My search for a fwb
 

Is numb good? I think so in a way. As long as it doesn't hurt as much.

Re: My search for a fwb
 

Numb till the point of being zombie and lose interest in the marriage relationship totally is not healthy imo.

Are you both talking still when see each other daily?

If too personal dun wanna say it ok .

Sorry ah if i talk too much

Also dunno how to share song haizz

Re: My search for a fwb
 

What is a fwb again?

Re: My search for a fwb
 

Im really sorry to hear you are in this plight.

Do you currently have any kids? might be because your wife know you might have evidence liao so she might lose the kid?

I did consider the situation if my wife cheated on me would I still stay with her? My answer is i Will, because I do not want my princess to lose their mother...this is the only reason.

Re: My search for a fwb
 

Sorry bro, it's Friends With Benefits

Re: My search for a fwb
 

Thanks bros. No need to feel sorry for me. Things happen for a reason. For me, it seems like a blessing a disguise.

If things didn't happen I won't be able to meet several ladies within a short period.

Re: My search for a fwb
 

It's really sad to hear your story and hope u can stay strong bro.

Re: My search for a fwb
 

Ever since I found out, I felt unbalanced in life. Many occasions I lose concentration at work. Sometimes I daydream when I'm driving.

Maybe I should cheat too. I've forgiven and tolerated for years. No platonic friendship involves the words honey, darling, dear unless it's a clear friend-zone which most guys won't bother going further.

Heard about fwbs and fbs but I had no idea how to search for one. And I envy guys out there have one. I searched SBF and got some clues. I saw some posts in the forum mentioning different platforms to find one.

I tried Ashley Madison, Adult Friend Finder, Skout, Wechat, Linked, OKCupid. The first 2 social sites were like scams. You need credits and what not to read instant messages. And immediately after I registered, I got PMs. Too good to be true so I didn't frequent it so much.

OKC was nice. I've chatted with several ladies. Married, divorced, separated, single, complicated ones.

LINK was not as good as advertised.

Skout was quite amazing. I actually had a girl chat me up. It was funny as she had a great sense of humor. Eventually she posted her photo. Very pretty girl. Divorced at a very young age. However we stopped chatting due to some mis-communication and cheekiness. Eventually skout started to lag at night when I am most active and I logged on less frequently.

Backpage was ok. Found several FL adverts but I am starting to dislike those PRC FLs. Emotions are too fake and so were the moans. However there was one PRC who was pretty, sweet and did a very good BBBJ for me. Had a tight pussy which made me cum very fast. Couldn't find her in the trade anymore though. Perhaps she got caught.

Then I chanced upon this certain class ads portal which I made the most number of contacts. I was hanging around the portal reading the posts and got some reference on how and what to post.

Re: My search for a fwb
 

bro very impressive, u really invest lot of time ... :D

Re: My search for a fwb
 

Impressive. Really investing time and effort into it. What is this class ads portal about? Sounds interesting. :)

Re: My search for a fwb
 

Denial and feeling numb ... maybe that's 1 way of dealing with it.

One door closes and another opens ... looking forward to your stories :D

Re: My search for a fwb
 

Bro, when you cannot concentrate at work, that's when you have the time.

I omitted one of the popular names. I believe some bros here know which one.

I find the response a little Lukewarm as compared to my first story during my army days.

But I will still continue to share when I have some break time from work. :)