What should i do?

[MrBaller]

Hi to all brothers and sisters,

Currently i'm in a dilemma, here goes my story, appreciate any constructive comments.

I met this girl as a colleague last year (Lets call her A). Initially i wasn't interested in any relationship, however as time goes by, i started to develop feelings for her.

Fast forward to this year, I knew i would need to make my feelings known to her. Hence i targeted it at April as her birthday falls during this period. All was well as i started to do a bday celebration for her. I also asked a couple of friends of hers to join in(whom i know). I baked a cake for her and made chocolate roses. After that night, i send her home with a small gift. Inside there was a thank you card (with a hint of how i wish tonight would be a recurring one). And yea, i did not verbally confess to her.

After that day, i tried to make further arrangements for outings, however A suggested after her exams. A few days later (12th), i confessed to A (thru text), however till now i haven gotten any replies. The next day, i actually asked her friend whether are there for any pointers for me to take to woo A. But the friend mentioned that she had someone in mind so...... i tried to probe further but to no alas citing privacy. The friend suggested that i still can be friends with her. The last msg to A was that all this might be too much for her to accept, but i need to put my feelings across.

I'm at my wits end. Moreover, today i visited a temple and got a bad lot for this issue.

That is my story currently, i hope that you guys can give some insight on this. I know i missed the chance to act on the celebration night and i confessed thru text which is a big no no. We wont be seeing each at other for now at work as we are part-timers.

Questions:
1) What is running through the girl's mind? By not replying to me, my friends cited 2 possible scenarios; either she dunno how to reject me and save this friendship or she is still considering me.
2) To what extent does a friend's info can be trusted?
3) Facing rejection, how can the two maintain as friends? Because deep in me, i will find it hard to be a friend outside while the inside of me......

[chanster]

Originally Posted by MrBaller

Hi to all brothers and sisters,

Currently i'm in a dilemma, here goes my story, appreciate any constructive comments.

I met this girl as a colleague last year (Lets call her A). Initially i wasn't interested in any relationship, however as time goes by, i started to develop feelings for her.

Fast forward to this year, I knew i would need to make my feelings known to her. Hence i targeted it at April as her birthday falls during this period. All was well as i started to do a bday celebration for her. I also asked a couple of friends of hers to join in(whom i know). I baked a cake for her and made chocolate roses. After that night, i send her home with a small gift. Inside there was a thank you card (with a hint of how i wish tonight would be a recurring one). And yea, i did not verbally confess to her.

After that day, i tried to make further arrangements for outings, however A suggested after her exams. A few days later (12th), i confessed to A (thru text), however till now i haven gotten any replies. The next day, i actually asked her friend whether are there for any pointers for me to take to woo A. But the friend mentioned that she had someone in mind so...... i tried to probe further but to no alas citing privacy. The friend suggested that i still can be friends with her. The last msg to A was that all this might be too much for her to accept, but i need to put my feelings across.

I'm at my wits end. Moreover, today i visited a temple and got a bad lot for this issue.

That is my story currently, i hope that you guys can give some insight on this. I know i missed the chance to act on the celebration night and i confessed thru text which is a big no no. We wont be seeing each at other for now at work as we are part-timers.

Questions:
1) What is running through the girl's mind? By not replying to me, my friends cited 2 possible scenarios; either she dunno how to reject me and save this friendship or she is still considering me.
2) To what extent does a friend's info can be trusted?
3) Facing rejection, how can the two maintain as friends? Because deep in me, i will find it hard to be a friend outside while the inside of me......

Go back to school

[Inceptionist]

She don't know how to reject you or she is just shunning you after your confession.

If you want to continue being friends, you need to change your approach. Try a light hearted or humorous approach

[porscheclub]

Love is a strange chemical reaction connecting two beings together. Your actions might be overwhelming for her so much so that she's avoiding you now. Yes she's scared because rejecting might destroy you but if she meets you then you'll
get the wrong idea so avoiding is the best option.

Sometimes when the right person appears, a simple smile is all that it takes.

So don't worry practise more and find the right lady. Meanwhile play it cool & she might come looking for you If not there's plenty of fishes in the ocean

[Tai_zi21]

All in my pov only

First she is not considering u at all,so pls stop giving urself false hope anymore! Ask urself would u totally avoid the guy if u consider him? She is trying to save the friendship cos u r a mr nice guy tat all

It very normal for gal to have someone in mind isn't it? Even she dun doesn't mean she will consider or accept u anyway

Last answer to ur ques forget abt her,i assume u r still young look for other target and move on with ur life

[MrBaller]

Thanks to all replies till now

@Inceptionist: how can i change my approach when i had showed my cards?

@porscheclub: 'Your actions might be overwhelming for her so much so that she's avoiding you now. Yes she's scared because rejecting might destroy you but if she meets you then you'll get the wrong idea so avoiding is the best option.' I understand the rationale behind this, its always seems to be something wrong either ways, just as much i'm waiting for her reply yet i fear of rejection. What to make of if she still doesn't reply. I dont want to seem to be preesing hard against her.

@Tai_zi21: the 3rd qn is there hence i'm prepared for the worst. How can not replying = saving friendship? If i were to wait it out, its scary to think that this might turn to anger which i hope doesn't happen.

[Koiz]

Originally Posted by MrBaller

..met .. girl .. colleague last year .. April.. her birthday.. started .. celebration.. couple of friends ..baked a cake .. chocolate roses. .. send her home with a small gift.

After that .. tried to make further arrangements for outings, however A suggested after her exams. .. asked her friend .. friend mentioned .. she had someone in mind .. visited a temple and got a bad lot..


Questions:
1) What is running through the girl's mind?
2) To what extent does a friend's info can be trusted?

Hope following useful (otherwise ignore):

1) She is interested - probably needs time to consider. Ask her when the exam is over. Wish her all the best for the coming exam. Do not disturb her until exam over. Move on if no progress after "exam period" - clear decision then.
2) Never trust her friend's info 100%. Her friend could be interested in you / out to sabotage. Also, unlikely that a sweet/nice looking girl will have no boyfriends.
3) "visited a temple and got a bad lot" - trust you own feelings, no need to be so superstitious.

Opinions may/will often differ - no need to agree.

All the best.

[prettymannequin]

Just be a friend, continue treating her like you do to others. That's the only way to make things less awkward for now!

[queenstar]

Originally Posted by prettymannequin

Just be a friend, continue treating her like you do to others. That's the only way to make things less awkward for now!

That Right support you

[Wintermelontea]

Go chase other gals...leave her alone for now as her heart is with the other fella...

there should be other gals for you de...guys normally have more than 1 gal in sight/radar...but need time to lock-on since missiles all used up in the first target.

good luck.

[hoho99]

Originally Posted by MrBaller

After that day, i tried to make further arrangements for outings, however A suggested after her exams. A few days later (12th), i confessed to A (thru text), however till now i haven gotten any replies. The next day, i actually asked her friend whether are there for any pointers for me to take to woo A. But the friend mentioned that she had someone in mind so...... i tried to probe further but to no alas citing privacy. The friend suggested that i still can be friends with her. The last msg to A was that all this might be too much for her to accept, but i need to put my feelings across.

I'm at my wits end. Moreover, today i visited a temple and got a bad lot for this issue.

Kekeke, seeing your post, you must be a very young boy sibo?

People preparing for exam, you go drop bomb on her You so desperate to tell her you are not a sensitive guy who cannot accomodate her timing or showing her you so eager to bring her to bed?

By the way, you already ask 神 and got a lot but you still wanna ask samsters, so you must have held a very high regards for us

Perhaps you can consider tidings to ah Sam and he might bo bi your points to be higher in this forum

[Johnbass]

I also share with you my story...
Last time got this samstress, she never liked me since Day 1.
Rejected me many times.
But slowly she starts to reply me and say hi.
Now we are BEST friends.


Moral of the story... Must learn to take rejections gracefully.

*Paiseh, if I exaggerated some parts*

[maxsee]

Time will heals all wounds....getting your heart broken is like quitting drugs...the initial part is extremely uncomfortable....but each passing day would make things better.....

[MrBaller]

@ Koiz: yea, i intend to leave her to chill. Her friend herself got a bf, out to sabo? i hope not, the girls are close and i places great trust in those whom i know.

@ prettymannequin: had to be one, but currently we are in a stationary position.

@ Wintermelontea: my circle of female friends is very small. plus getting to know someone now doesn't seems to be natural.

@ hoho99: yes you may say the timing isn't correct, but firstly i already dropped a hint on that night. I believe that if there isn't prompt follow up, girls might think i'm not genuine in what i had expressed. sometimes when one is down, imo all sources of opinions are welcomed

@ johnbass: comforting to hear a positive end to it.

[saabking]

Originally Posted by porscheclub

Love is a strange chemical reaction connecting two beings together. Your actions might be overwhelming for her so much so that she's avoiding you now. Yes she's scared because rejecting might destroy you but if she meets you then you'll
get the wrong idea so avoiding is the best option.

Sometimes when the right person appears, a simple smile is all that it takes.

是你的，就是你的。
不是你的，不要抢！
人之所以快乐，不是因为得到的多、而是因为计较的少

that is what i learn from master samster