love has die?

[Avant Garde]

hi guys

want to share and seek advise. me and wife have been married bout 8 years. we marry young. i and her only finish secondary 2. we have 0 children till now but we seldom do that thing as she don't like it. she think bj is digust

me just a clerk pay not high and also not say look like tom cruise maybe below average. my wifeis a secretary. sigh how to say. i think she love someone else now. maybe someone more rich and good looks. she goes drink almost all nites as her fren and work frens all quite young

me feel abit bad as can't really her perfect life and now economy no good. can anyone advise how to ask her if divorce? sometime she comment like regret marry early make me feel bad. if i divorce her hope she find wat she wants

sad

[GreenHorny]

Bro Avant Garde,
I must praise that you are really a mr nice guy, and that you really love her, as u hope the best for her even if after the divorce.
However, i would suggust you not to make fast conclusion. Although early marriage might sometime suggust she still haven enjoy enough, but that does not mean she does not love you anymore.
Have a good talk with her. Open your heart, and tell her how you really feel. If that still dun work, there are many professional marriage consultation outside which could help you. Dun give up so easily if you still love her.
Worse come to worse, if she really fall in love with another man, be a man, let her go. Pain is inevitable, but u r still young. Hook up with some sbf bros, bring u to superb bonks, superb bbbj. No big deal. Now economy bad, if u stress urself still, you gonna fall into a depression. Cheer Upz..

[Blue_gal]

move on...not easy but tat is LIFE...dun be too hard for urself...LIFE is already a hard one to live "IN"...so be nice to urself....

be positive! tis one can't work out.. there is plenty in the OCEAN!!...

cheer up!
Blue Aunt|e

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Go read this.
All u need to know is here!

http://sbfonline.site/matters...ml#post3458801

Same theory applies

[pewpew]

Have a nice chat with her, see how things is going before you start thinking about divorce.

DO NOT ASSUME AND PRESUME coz that will cause misunderstanding and regrets in future.

[colins]

Bro TS, there is nothing more unfortunate than a person who has given up on himself. If you believe that you are lazy, you won't go and take a course to improve your education and employability. If you believe that you are hopeless, you won't want to find out what she really wants.

If you believe you are not worth her love, you won't believe that you are perhaps the only guy in the world who is willing to love her unconditionally, whether got money, good life, career...etc, or not.

So bro, you choose your life. No woman will want to stay with a guy who is happy stagnanting himself. At least you can show some effort in putting improvement in your relationship with her. From that angle, if you think this way, you will know what you have to do.

[DesSia]

Getting married young is not the problems. The problems is not getting the right treatment from either party and too greedy for better things in life.

What is life?

Happiness is the foundation of life;
Life is the formulation of choices;
Choices is the formation of happiness!

So what's make life so boring? Wrong choices resulting in no happiness thus boring life. Understand?

Both of you should sit down and discuss whatever right or wrong of either parties and sort it out. No point a bit of problems start thinking of divorce. All problems have many solution. Try to see it at another angle. Problems will not look for you if you don't want it.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

Bro DesSia, new nick but wise posts....reminds me of someone...hmmmmmmmmmm

[pussyman72]

Communication is very important... open up the table and talk to her... whatever problem sit down and discuss what is the actual problem...

If the problem is on u or her then see can be resolve cannot and she feel that really wanna split then bo bian. u decide what to do...

i may not be married but i believe that if even open communication cannot resolve the problem then what is the point to carry on... even try so hard still cannot then give up better then regret later...

anyway good luck to u. Cheers

[mike1304k]

Dear TS,

I am sorry to hear your situation. But never look down on yourself!! Sometimes marrying young will lead to the inevitable problem of either or both party wanting to try new things. Especially if either party now has more economic freedom than the other. My personal take will be that you speak to your wife, explain to her how you feel. Then if she expects more from you, then see if you can improve yourself. But if not, then let her go. I do sincerly applaud you for your willingness to let her go and let her be happy, but the people I know have actually used this as a means to step up in life and make themselves better.

1) A very close fren of mine, normal guy, no degree but working in the IT sector. Marries this wife who was former SQ and she kept asking him to buy this, upgrade that and so on. In the beginning, he thought he had married into a life in hell. But then the fren spoke to the girl, then she sort of lowered her expectations, (not a lot hor) and also stopped going out to "party" anymore and he took up courses and so on. Now he is an IT Manager and they have 2 children and are living happily.

2) Both married young.. as in no more than 20, because of shot-gun. The girl was a princess from a very rich family and so had a lot of expectations. The guy also thought... 9 minutes of pleasure and 9 years of hell had begun. Things were very very difficult because princess was only child, brought up like princess and also treated like princess. But the guy tried his best, work a lot of things and worked very hard. Saved some money and showed that he can try. In the end, now they are expecting their 2nd child and seem very happy.

Many young couples miss out on a lot of things when they marry young. The girls will think that they have a bad deal especially if the guy is not too rich or highly educated. And because the girls go out to work, they are exposed to a life that they have not experienced and also may not be able to experience with their husband. But being married means working things out together. through thick or thin, better or worse. If the girl or guy understands and tries to meet the other half way, while the other party tries to improve or make things work out, then in theory, the marriage should be able to last. However, in so saying, sometimes it does not work out. Then let her go. Just like WL or FL or wife, if you love someone truly, then let them go and wish them happiness. In the end, happiness may find you too.

[sammyboyfor]

Originally Posted by Avant Garde

hi guys

want to share and seek advise.

Should be "Want to share and seek ADVICE.".

"Advise" is a verb.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

You can be poor
You can be lowly educated
You can be handicapped
But that doesnt mean anything

Wealth doesnt mean money
Wat is wealth????
Wealth is mental purity
Wealth is physical well being
Wealth is peace and purity in the heart

Money is actually not considered as GOOD Wealth but "PROBLEMATIC" wealth
Got more money, will have more probs

But most important thing in your life is YOU! No one can see you no up....even if people say you looser watever, you need not be one!
But once you allow yourself to feel like one, you are already beaten.

Just remember, a wife that 有难自己当，有福同享 can ask her for fuck off cos this type means you just married CANCER
But if she not this type, then try to work things out.

[EtherC]

Life is a symphony of imperfections. Occasionally the notes will escalate into something truly inspirational and deeply touching. Cherish these moments and ride out of the bumps that come your way. If you're not academically inclined go learn a skill(Underwater welding for eg makes good money). This recession will most likely mean retrenchment for a lot of white collar workers. If you're willing to work hard with your hands I'm sure you'll be able to provide well for your wife. The true measure of a man lies in the way he deals with problems.

[DO_YOU_BJ]

人是活的
什么都是死的
解决问题是用脑
用心什么也解决不了

[sexfrenzy]

Well like a bro above rightly point out, there is no better avenue now than to sit down and have a talk together. A relationship is unique in its own right and none of us here can give you a recipe to resolve your issue.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
I had a fren who has an almost similar situation such as yourself.
They were both ROMed and were together for 5 years since school. Both came out to work in the society. My friend does not have a bachelor and work as an IT helpdesk engineer.
The lady works as an admin and met 2 colleagues who keep criticizing that my fren is not good enuff for her, not rich, handsome, educated etc. In the end, they intro her to a guy colleague who bring her to clubbing and drives her to work everyday.

My fren was shattered when she filed for annulment. She even got a protection order against him to cut off all communication. In the end, they divorced.
-------------------------------------------------------------

So if u value your your relationship, try to salvage it. Do what you can. Talk to her, and find out what went wrong. And if it is your issue, correct it.

People do change in diff stages of their lives.. expectation changes, character changes. Important thing is that she must still loves you. Otherwise whatever you do will be in vain.

Good Luck.